BHAGODE Shravan ...aur... woh itni bhi badi baat nahi thi.

May be this topic has been beaten to death and I am not saying anything new. But I felt I had to write something on this. So please bear with me.😳

I feel every conversation we have in real life has different perspectives. Sometimes when people are not on the same wave length, misunderstandings crop up. So if I had been in Shravan's place with all the history I had with Suman , I may not have taken it very seriously. Because to an extent, I can connect with Suman- who she was in the past, and what she is today. I can also sympathise with Shravan, because I know he didn't get what she was trying to say...he was in not in a mindset to make an effort to, either.

I thought I'll try and see if I can make some sense out of why Suman came out with two very insensitive dialogues. In no way I am trying to prove one person is greater or lesser than the other, but trying to see their view points. I think the key to understanding Suman here comes from the first promo.

Bhagode Shravan: Runaway.

Suman: I know you are upset with me. You have been ignoring me ever since you came back. You read my apology, and I even said it to you though you ignored me the other night. You came late, because of you I stayed hungry, yet I wanted to make it up. But you refuse to acknowledge me or make an effort on your own.

Yesterday, you acted like a perfect stranger- so cold and distant. I was not sure if you remembered all that we had shared before...so when I brought up the apology...I wanted to make sure I was not belittling you by making a huge thing out of something foolish I did that may or may not have hurt you...perhaps it was not a big thing...going by how cool and composed and unaffected you are now, I suppose woh itni bhi badi baat nahi thi'. I was pretty sure that would be your response to me if I apologised to you. Tum dus saal se yahi atki huyi ho? Aur koi kaam nahi tha?'

[YOUTUBE]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qbDY5P30aGo[/YOUTUBE]

Now I know you are more than just a little upset with me. Your behaviour suggests that I do affect you in some way, since I can now actually read resentment in your behaviour with me, rather than complacence. I had never thought you'd be so insensitive. But what you did today really crossed the limits. What is between us should not be a fodder to insult my family and hurt their sentiments. If you have unfinished business with me, stand up and face me. Talk to me, rather than run away like you did years ago.

Yes. You did run away back then too. One day your mother leaves your father, and the next day you run away to London without ever looking back. I am left waiting for you to come back- for ten long years. But you kept running and never came back...that is all our friendship meant to you, perhaps. Why couldn't you have stayed here and faced your problems, let me apologise and left with a proper good bye?

Shravan: So you think I ran away? After all these years , don't think you can keep insulting me and I'll take it sitting down, Suman. This time around, I'll show you what it means to be hurt by a friend- then you'll know if it is a badi baat or a chhotti baat!

Originally posted by: -Sush-

Hi Chick,

I understand what made it difficult for Suman to apologize...but the lack of sentivity she has shown to the entire episode and to Shravans feelings continues to apall me...

How difficult is it for her to say...What I did was horrible, I understand how much of a blow it must have been to you...to first be abandoned by your mother and than by me...in front of others...I am really, truly sorry...I understand if you never want to talk to me for what I did to you...But if you gave me the chance to be your friend again...you can count on me,...

She seems to focus totally on her own feelings...doesn't admit she was wrong...😲

Anyway just my opinion...don't want to start fanwars...

Originally posted by: MrDarcyfan

Nice post Chicky. But I agree with Sush. Suman needed to acknowledge that she was wrong. That is why I made her do that in my OS. I didn't make Shravan look good for choosing to revenge himself on her that way but neither did I trivialize his feelings. I think THAT was always the issue. Shravan felt his feelings were never important to Suman. Not even 10 years later. That line "It was not that big of a deal anyway" (said for the wrong reasons) hurt him even more and then he was bent on revenge. Yes he was giving her attitude, but I think that encounter sealed the deal for him and he decided to actually get even with her.

In the OS I wrote they both kept accusing each other, but at least Suman accepted her fault, and Shravan was yet to acknowledge his. But he felt bad when she said they will always maintain distance from now on. He didn't get the "Pay off" he thought he would from insulting her. Somehow it didn't feel as great as he thought it would. Maybe on the show it's the same too, but they are taking a more staggered approach to it. We could see from the scenes of Shravan leaving the party how restless he was. This was before the dressing down from Pushkar Btw.

No he didn't run away. I think he just removed himself from the situation. He could not take it anymore what with his Mum leaving and then Suman's defection. He finally had no reason to refuse his Dad's suggestion of studying in London. Sometimes distance is needed to put things into perspective, or in this case warp things even more!

Originally posted by: -Sush-

Hi Chick,

I understand what made it difficult for Suman to apologize...but the lack of sensitivity she has shown to the entire episode and to Shravans feelings continues to appall me...

How difficult is it for her to say...What I did was horrible, I understand how much of a blow it must have been to you...to first be abandoned by your mother and then by me...in front of others... I am really, truly sorry...I understand if you never want to talk to me for what I did to you...But if you gave me the chance to be your friend again...you can count on me,...

She seems to focus totally on her own feelings...doesn't admit she was wrong...😲. The first step of apology is an honest acknowledgement that you were wrong, and being able to see...what the other person felt because of your actions...Shravan hasn't apologized yet...but the viewers see that he is realizing his mistake...he is seeing the impact his actions have had on Suman's life...He is focused on her feelings...I wish the makers will pay attention to this aspect of the story...and show the same for Suman, in those 10 years after Shravan left...and she regretted her actions... [May be an apology like the one I wrote above is not possible...because it will resolve the situation and finish the story...😛😆, but her private feelings can be shown)

Anyway just my opinion...don't want to start fan wars...

Originally posted by: -Sush-

Hi Chick,

I understand what made it difficult for Suman to apologize...but the lack of sensitivity she has shown to the entire episode and to Shravans feelings continues to appall me...

How difficult is it for her to say...What I did was horrible, I understand how much of a blow it must have been to you...to first be abandoned by your mother and then by me...in front of others... I am really, truly sorry...I understand if you never want to talk to me for what I did to you...But if you gave me the chance to be your friend again...you can count on me,...

She seems to focus totally on her own feelings...doesn't admit she was wrong...😲. The first step of apology is an honest acknowledgement that you were wrong, and being able to see...what the other person felt because of your actions...Shravan hasn't apologized yet...but the viewers see that he is realizing his mistake...he is seeing the impact his actions have had on Suman's life...He is focused on her feelings...I wish the makers will pay attention to this aspect of the story...and show the same for Suman, in those 10 years after Shravan left...and she regretted her actions... [May be an apology like the one I wrote above is not possible...because it will resolve the situation and finish the story...😛😆, but her private feelings can be shown)

Anyway just my opinion...don't want to start fan wars...

Originally posted by: MrDarcyfan

Nice post Chicky. But I agree with Sush. Suman needed to acknowledge that she was wrong. That is why I made her do that in my OS. I didn't make Shravan look good for choosing to revenge himself on her that way but neither did I trivialize his feelings. I think THAT was always the issue. Shravan felt his feelings were never important to Suman. Not even 10 years later. That line "It was not that big of a deal anyway" (said for the wrong reasons) hurt him even more and then he was bent on revenge. Yes he was giving her attitude, but I think that encounter sealed the deal for him and he decided to actually get even with her.

In the OS I wrote they both kept accusing each other, but at least Suman accepted her fault, and Shravan was yet to acknowledge his. But he felt bad when she said they will always maintain distance from now on. He didn't get the "Pay off" he thought he would from insulting her. Somehow it didn't feel as great as he thought it would. Maybe on the show it's the same too, but they are taking a more staggered approach to it. We could see from the scenes of Shravan leaving the party how restless he was. This was before the dressing down from Pushkar Btw.

No he didn't run away. I think he just removed himself from the situation. He could not take it anymore what with his Mum leaving and then Suman's defection. He finally had no reason to refuse his Dad's suggestion of studying in London. Sometimes distance is needed to put things into perspective, or in this case warp things even more!