FF ~Yeh Dooriyan ~ update pg14

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-Misek-

@-Misek-

Rocker

+ 3

Posted: 13 years ago

#11

Originally posted by: Miss.Colorfull

thanks. i choose akash n manatys since their relationship is boring so i wanted to add some spice n drama to it like a fight between them so manatya realizes who she really wants. next ff is def going to be manveer for sure.

Yaaayyy...Gud luk 👍🏼 👍🏼 😃

ps add me on PM list as well 😊

Edited by limbu.simmy - 13 years ago

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Poulomi Das

@_Poulomi_

Stunner

+ 2

Posted: 13 years ago

#12

Shivu...🤗

before that i'll start reading ur FF first!

okay read it!

Its awesome considering its ur first FF!

can i give u one suggestion?

Edited by poulomi12 - 13 years ago

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shivani

@Miss.Colorfull

Rocker

+ 2

Posted: 13 years ago

#13

Originally posted by: poulomi12
Shivu...🤗

before that i'll start reading ur FF first!

okay read it!
Its awesome considering its ur first FF!

can i give u one suggestion?

thanks. sure u can give a suggestion 😳

Quote

Poulomi Das

@_Poulomi_

Stunner

+ 2

Posted: 13 years ago

#14

Your dialogues are bang on!😉

but descriptions are a lil inadequate, esp when u r describing someone's reactions and surrounding! work on them! I loved the way u described Akash's possessiveness and jealousy...it felt natural! so 👍🏼 and 👏 for that!

And keep writing!

P.S. : My Akash scene was way better than urs!

Quote

shivani

@Miss.Colorfull

Rocker

+ 2

Posted: 13 years ago

#15

Originally posted by: poulomi12
Your dialogues are bang on!😉
but descriptions are a lil inadequate, esp when u r describing someone's reactions and surrounding! work on them! I loved the way u described Akash's possessiveness and jealousy...it felt natural! so 👍🏼 and 👏 for that!

And keep writing!

P.S. : My Akash scene was way better than urs!

thanks i will keep that in mind. 😳