I agree with what AngelLikieDevil said.
As the way our country is at this stage, this question of whether to go for love marriage or go for arranged marriage becomes complicated. Arranged marriages definitely worked when India had a static society. Some fixed ideas worked for centuries. Parents of the daughter knew what they wanted for her. Find someone who will be her husband and a protector and a provider. The parents of the son also knew they needed to find a companion and a partner for him in his life. The man worked and the wife was a home maker. In a static society with this type of situation, the parents or the older people know more and have more wisdom and there choice which is arranged marriage system worked well.
But now Indian society has become dynamic with the outlook of younger generation changing a lot. And certain changes are not liked by the elders. At times, the parents don't give total importance to the happiness of their son and all they want is impose their culture on him. They look for a daughter-in-law for them instead of a wife for the son. The son on the other hand may look for an understanding wife for himself, one who co-operates with him in the market uncertainties and one who also could take up employment. And he is also prepared to leave his parents to live with his wife when he finds she is caring and understanding to him. He is also prepared to cook for her. This is not taken well by his parents. In this situation, the son is forced to find his own partner instead of expecting his parents to find suitable wife for him.
But then things are not easy for the son either if he is to go for love marriage. He may fall in love with some woman and looks into her profiles and believes she is a suitable partner for him. And he believes this way in the thrill of romantic love. And once he ties the knot, he finds things different. Romantic love and intimate love are not the same. The woman he married could have weird fears and weird notions and in that situation, he finds he doesn't know how to cope up with her. His parents wouldn't help him either and they only blame him if the marriage fails.
What is the possibility here? One hard truth is as per the way the society and the present generation are, marriages work only for those persons who had understanding relationship with their parents. When the parents love, adore, understand and validate the son/daughter the ward of the parents won't look for 'special needs' from the spouse. The parents have to have care, compassion, gentleness, tenderness and understanding to the son/daughter. In that situation they respect their ward's view and could find suitable partner also and can even help the son/daughter to find his/her own partner. One hard aspect in our country is parents don't validate, respect or understand the concerns of the son or daughter and that is where the whole conflict results. This situation worked in static society but in a dynamic society because of this reason, divorces are increasing. This is the area Indian society is to work to find better results.
Edited by maha2us - 9 years ago
Geet - Hui Sabse Parayee
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