*~H.G.O.R.C. #548~*- $~Invites Only~$ - Page 6

na chahte hove bhe door na reh saka.. os ne BD wish ki or muhe rula diya. kiyon ke family ke baad kisi ne itne ache se wish kiya he nahi tha shayed is liye,

main ne phir se koshish ki ke ansar door raho is se. phir 10 nov a gayi or Mama ki death ke baad jese kisi ne care ki mujhe laga yehi hai wo... lekin phir se koshish ki or door raha..

magar kab tak rehta....

phir april 2014 wo larki meri life me pyaar ban ke ayi. dil se os ko accept kiya. lekin phir socha nahi.!!! main phir se sochne laga ke door rehna chahiye. but tab nahi kar saka or mera the end ho geya,

dil ne kaha yehi hai wo jo tumhain dil se khush kar degi, yehi hai wo jo os sad ansar ko zinda kar sakti hai jo kahin na kahin kho geya hai..

main ne kaha os larki se ke dekho agar sath dena hai to sath chalna mere.. or ager nahi to abhe side pe ho jao becoz kal ko tum to side pe ho jao gi lekin main nahi kar sakon ga. to abhe soch lo, os larki ne kaha nahi ansar tum he zindagi ho meri. os ne mujhe majboor kiya ke main os ka yakeen kar loon. or main ne kiya,

phir jab apne plan ko le kar agey chala to samjh aya ke sab asaan nahi hota.. zindgi me sab se bura waqat chal raha tha. future ka kuch pata nahi tha ke kya hoga or kya nahi. lekin itna pareshan hone ke baad bhe feel karta tha ke main dil se sad nahi hoon. matlab wo dard jo andar he andar mujhe maar raha tha wo nahi tha.

kaam ki waja se pareshan tha lekin kasam se dil sakoon me a geya tha.

to main khush hova ke eyse he himat haar geya tha or socha a gayi hai meri zindgi to ab khush he rehna hai hamesha..

phir wo umeed jo main bhula chuka tha wo wapis a gayi. or socha ke nahi ansar koi hai jis ne tumhain andar se zinda kar diya hai,

os larki ne acha kaam ye kiya ke 1 almost mare hove insaan ko jeene ki umeed de di os ne. or bura kaam ye kiya ke jate jate wo pehle se bhe bura haal kar gayi mera...

ya to ye sab karti he na, rehne deti osi pain me mujhe, or ager kar he liya tha to phir wo na karti jo dec 2015 me kiya os ne..

os ne mujhe meri zinddagi ka sab se acha time diya 2 saal ka, jab mujhe pata chala ke zindagi to sachi me khubsurat hai. lekin afsoos jaldi he sab cheen bhe liya,

You know ager koi insaan jail me ho, or os ko yakeen ho ke sari life isi jail me rehna hai, lekin phir koi os se ja kar bol de ke nahi. tum jaldi he jail se nikal jao ge, to 1 pal socho wo insaan kitna khush hoga... lekin theek waqat par Ap os se kaho ke tum jail se nahi nikalne wale to os ko zeayda dard hoga. becoz Ap ne os ko khushi de kar wapis dard diya. same yehi hova mere sath.

jesa bhe tha yaar main jee raha tha. dard me ya acting kar ke bus jee raha tha. lekin kisi ne mera hath tham kar mujhe 1 umeed di or wapis phir phenk diya..or phir a kar bolain ke ansar tumhara dard mujhe samjh a raha hai to i think ye mera mazakh he banaya geya tha ke mera dard os ki samjh me aya tha,

beshak dil weak hai. jo bhe hai itna bhe nahi hota ke koi insaan 1 he baat pe itna sad rahe wo bhe itne saal se.

sab batain mix ho gayin na ab to. abhe to acting bhe nahi hoti khush rehne ki,

bohot talent hai mujh me, koi bhe kaam karon dosre heraan reh jate hain ke kese kar liya ansar? lekin dil ke maamle me piche reh geya. is dhakan ko strong nahi kar saka main. isi ki galti hai sari. agar ye strong hota to naagin jesi larki ki himat he na hoti ke wo meri zindagi se khelne ki koshish karti.

or ye bohot kami hai mujh me.

Mama bhe kaha karti thin ke beta khud ko thora strong banao warna jeena mushkil ho jayega. or mujhe lagta tha ke sab meri Mama ki tarhan he hain jo apni care se or apne pyaar se mujhe rone nahi de saktin

main galat tha... is duniya me survive karne keyliye zaroori hai ke dil naagin jesa ho. is baat pe on ki tareef karni chahiye or ye taane mar wali tareef nahi sachi wali tareef hai.

main to khud ka kheyal rakhne ke kabil nahi to main ne or kya karna tha life me.. loooser kahin ka.

marne ki khuwiash 100% hai mujhe, koshish bhe ki beemar karne ki, lekin marna kab hai i dont know.

lekin ye soch kar dar lagta hai ke abhe to 5 saal he hove or baki ki life eyse he guzarne wali hai itne pain me..

wo log jo bolte hain ke khud ko theek karo, ya ye kehte hain ke theek ho jao ge, ye wo log hain jo mujhe 1% bhe nahi jante. on ko kuch maloom nahi hai

mera 1 record ban geya hai. dec 2015 se ab tak, aj ki date tha bhe,! koi eysa insaan jo mujhe 1 saal ke baad ya 1 month ke baad bhe dekhe to 1 he baat puchta hai ke ansar ro kar aye ho? eysa nahi hai ke 24 hour he rota hoon, baat ye hai ke eyes me dard he itna hai ke sab ko nazar ata hai ye dard, or agar koi zeyada deep jaye to phir ansu bhe a jate hain. blv me jab bhe kisi ne dekha mujhe sab se pehle meri eyes ko dekh kar sawal kiya mujh se.

meri ye ankhain jis ko bhe dekh rhi hon bus eyse lagta hai jese ye req kar rahi hon, on se keh rahi hon ke plz help me. lekin koi kuch nhi kar sakta.

or ye sab ki sab batain os shehzadi, maahaaan Naagin ki waja se hain.

os ne koi galat kaam thori na kiya hai,? bus zindagi he to barbaad ki hai meri, or kisi ki zindagi barbaad karna koi galat kaam thori hai? or wo bhe meri. lol main to toy tha on ka, jo on ke kaam aya ke wo khel sakain mujh se.

warna os se pehle jesa bhe tha. beshak aandar se sad tha lekin bahir se to khush tha na. eyese he is CC ki history me chala geya tha. or koi 12 hours se ye sab read kiya. yakeen nahi a raha tha ke ye main he tha?

100% yehi hova mere sath.

main ne naagin se nahi kaha tha ke aao meri life me or meri help karo. main ne kaha na main to accept kar chuka tha ke ab eyse he jeena hai.

lekin os naagin ne 1 umeed de kar mujhe os se bhe 100X zeyada pain diya jis me already me tha.

main kya blame karon bechari naagin pe? lol talent ki to tareef karni chahiye,

lekin haan pathar ka dil hai ye zaroor kahon ga main, naya ashiq dhond liya tha to thori si to care kar leti meri. ya kam se kam yehi bol deti ke ansar tumhari sab batain main sun sakti hoon bolo.. os ne ye bhe nahi kha tha.....

.

wo to kehti thi tumhari sab baton ko ignore karna hai, tum rowo ya dard ho mujhe koi fark nahi parta. tum mere or mere ashiq ke beech me na aao,.

is baat pe to 100% blame banta hai mera. ke dil tora mera. or baad me salt lagaya, os ki care nahi chahiye thi mujhe, bus ye to dekh leti os ne kiya os ke baad meri halat kya ho gayi thi..

main ne kitni baar kaha hai ke ec 2015 me wo kese baat karti thi wo sab main kabhe phir se read kar he nahi saka.. may 2019 wali to 100 baar kar li lekin dec wali nahi hoti mujh se.

jab ye zindagi khubsurat ho to jeene ka man karta hai, dil karta hai ke 1000 saal ki zindagi mil jaye,

or jab ye zindagi naagin jese logon ki waja se saza ban jaye to phir jeene ka sawal he nahi banta. phir to har lamha saza ban jata hai, phir to yehi dua hoti hai, koshish hoti hai, khuwiash hoti hai ke kab wo din ayega jab akhri sans hogi...

main to naagin se mazakh karta tha ke main tum se zeyada sharpmind hoon, lekin lagta hai os ne kafi serious le liya is baat ko or apna talent dikhane keliye os ne meri he zindagi ko barbaad kar diya ye dikhane keyliye ke wo zeyada sharp hai.

main janta hoon wo dimaag me bohot tez hai mujh se, warna baar baar mujhe ullu kese banati. sharpmind hai to he eysa kar sakti hai, jab man kare araam se mujhe ullu bana deti hai,

2014 ho ya 2015. 2017 ho ya 2019. main to ullu he bana...

chotti si kiddo, lol