The Path to Confession - SwaRon/TanHa topic

Never Say Never

He pushed the laptop aside and stood up. Very carefully he kept his spectacles on the desk and moved towards the washroom. It was 11pm and it was time to go to bed. There was a studied deliberation in his movements as if his limbs were on auto-pilot and his mind couldn't care less. He glanced briefly at the rain outside, then continued on his way. Once upon a time he would have hung his head out from the window like a dog to feel the cold refreshing drops on his face...no more.

She stood staring at the door looking almost scared. There was an uncharacteristic hesitation in her movements. She shivered a little, unconsciously, as the rain seeped into her bones. She had seen him come home as dusk began to fall and marched to his door, determined to face this encounter like she had faced everything else, boldly and confidently. She planned to bulldoze him into accepting her. Now, 3 hrs of being too terrified to knock later, she realized now how dumb that thought had been. She had never been able to force him into doing anything, he had always been in the driver's seat where she was concerned.

He checked the thermometer and a wry smile crept on his lips. He was remembering his long-time and only friend, Rey's joke about his obsession with precision. Rey had seen him use the thermometer to measure his bath water's temperature a while back and was still giving him hell for it. He caught his reflection in the mirror and the familiar feeling of watching a stranger peering back seized him. Over the last 16 years, he had become unrecognizable even to himself. Back in college, the guy could teach a class on spontaneity. Now everything in his life was pre-planned and ran on schedule. There was no room for surprises. 16 years...since she had left, 16 years...since he had stopped living.

She felt a bolt of courage brighten her heart and raised her right hand to knock. She continued watching as that courage deserted her just as quickly and her hand hovered in mid air like a dazed fly. It wouldn't move ahead and she couldn't draw it back. No, she wouldn't. She had spent 16 years regretting a rash decision and the past 2 years stalking him, trying and failing to muster up enough courage to talk to him. Tonight was going to be the night she finally put them out of their misery. But... what if he was not miserable? 16 years is a long time to hold on to something that has given only pain. No. he has not moved on, she told herself and taking a deep breath, knocked.

He entered his bedroom and took out her photo. She was smiling and his lips curved into an involuntary answering smile. Rey thought it was unhealthy that he still went to bed with her photo under his pillow. She was gone and he wanted him to move on. Rey didn't understand. He knew she was gone. He had waited for months, confident about her unspoken love, knowing she will return...until the months had turned into years ...then the years into a decade...and she hadn't come. He didn't know when he had started accepting her rejection of his love, but it didn't hurt anymore. He had made peace with whatever little he had of her. He held on to her memories and cherished them because he didn't want to move on. There was nothing better to move on to.

He was about to turn out the lights when he heard the knock. He looked at his watch and frowned. He had no frigging idea who would come calling at this time in this godforsaken weather.

She couldn't believe she did that!! She just knocked on that door!! Anytime now, it would open and he would be standing in front of her. Oh God!! Oh God!! She didn't know what to say to him. She didn't even want to be here. She imagined the hatred in his eyes and every cell in her body screamed "Run"!

She couldn't run. Her blasted legs wouldn't move! She stood frozen to the spot, her green eyes wide with horror as the rain pounded harder and the wind howled. Her heart beat faster and louder, threatening to jump right out of her chest till she heard the door click and it stopped beating.

Complete and utter silence. That was the only thing the two people staring at each other across the threshold were aware of. He looked stunned, almost disbelieving. She looked like she was about to pass out and only his eyes were holding her up. Neither heard their thundering hearts or their heavy breathing. Neither knew whether at that moment they were dead or alive. Neither knew if this was real or a dream. Slowly she watched the shock in his eyes turn to anger. Hers turned pleading. As they kept staring, anger was replaced by a far worse emotion, pain. Hers started tearing up as they reflected his anguish. He seemed to be tearing apart inside and her heart started bleeding. Slowly, when she thought she would die if she had to look at that soul-scorching agony anymore She saw resignation creep in and her green eyes darkened with abject fear. She couldn't deal with resignation. Anger, she was prepared to withstand..pain, she was ready to heal..but resignation, she didn't know what to do with it.

Her eyes started begging as his softened in response. He asked, she answered. For the first time in her life she didn't try to hide anything. She was ready to bare her soul and leave herself defenseless like a wounded puppy at his feet to have him back in her life. She had spent 16 years, not knowing how to soothe the constant gnawing his absence had caused. She didn't know if what she was offering was enough anymore, but she hoped with every fibre of her being that he would think so.

Swayam Shekhawat felt like he was in a suspended state of reality. So this is what an out-of-body experience feels like. He saw as his hand rose and his fingers stretched to reach her but didn't remember commanding his hand to move. He saw Sharon's beautiful ,plump lips part to form words but heard nothing over the thunderous roaring in his ears. He was dimly aware that the noise was of heartbeats gone crazy but didn't know who did they belonged to, him...or...her. He watched motionless as her lips sealed once again and she hung her head. He continued watching as slowly, after an eternity she raised her eyes to meet his again. He watched as a solitary tear slid down her heart shaped face and finally the fog lifted..

His mind snapped back.

This was Sharon!! His Sharon...at his doorstep, asking for a second chance!!

She had come back!!

Yesterday didn't matter, the past 16 years didn't matter...this was today...and today he had his Sharon at his doorstep crying for him!!

Sharon didn't know what she had expected when she knocked at his door. She had been too scared to think. What she had hoped for though was anger. She had almost prayed that he'd shout, scream maybe even throw things at her. She'd hoped that in his fury she'd finally find some relief for the guilt that had been eating her alive for so many years, that his rage would be her catharsis. Yet as she looked at him now, she knew absolution wouldn't come that easily. Penance was going to be a long and painful road. The best she could hope for was a chance to undertake that journey. She had said her piece but he hadn't reacted. Maybe she was too late. She didn't want to believe it but maybe leaving was the right thing to do. She didn't deserve any more chances and maybe by leaving she could finally do the right thing by him, give the man who had given her everything, at least one thing in return. The tears were blinding her as she turned to leave when she heard the two most beautiful words in the English language...

"Come in"

Originally posted by: dvrushu

loved ur post...👏
it was soo soo well written...
falling in love with tanha..once again...
they were so awsmm, mesmerising, passionate n alsoo damm cute...
uhh brought old memories back...😭 😊
love tanha...n always will⭐️
there proud fan 😊