Potent thoughts, impotent words

There is a palpably aggressive undertone in theMy Choice video, which features Deepika Padukone (also the narrator) and 98 other women, and has gone viral. The video alienates the opposition (people who deny women their choices), and its lines lack the power to evoke emotion and the depth to invoke thought. From sifting through the angry responses to this video online, it appears that a vast number of viewers have taken exception to the line, "Sex outside marriage, my choice". I don't believe, however, that the intent here is to refer to an extra-marital affair, as has been widely misperceived " "sex outside marriage" could also be a reference to consensual sex had by, say, divorced women. The uproar is a result of the inefficacy of the words and the delicate nature of the topic. The line, after all, follows, "My choice: to have sex before marriage",making it easier for viewers to misunderstand.

The video laudably attempts to assert the freedom of women in choosing, among other things, sexual orientation, relationship status, and having a baby. The purpose seems to urge patriarchy to recognise that women have a choice too, but the writing puts paid to it. Imagine a person " your dad, for example " trying to stop you from doing something. Have you ever replied, "I'll do it. It's my choice," and found that it helped? There's a reason such an argument never works. It comes across as hostile and insensitive. When the condescending undertone is, "I don't care what you think", the point does not get across. Sexist men are left with the wrong notion that independent women are careless, insensitive and oblivious to consequences. The good ones, meanwhile, are left reeling from what seems like an undeserved attack. And hence, the responses it has met with which include a parodic male version of My Choice that has already got half-a-million views so far.

The video says it's wrong to be upset when a woman returns at 4 a.m.. The concern here, however, is more than just the freedom of a woman to come home late; it is about the dangers fraught in a society that isn't safe for women yet, especially during nights. Consequences, after all, hurt more than choices do. The video, in its emphasis on the latter, skips this conveniently. Can a woman take care of herself? Of course. Can a concerned person worry about said woman's safety? Of course. No reason to believe that the two are mutually exclusive, as the video suggests.

While Padukone recites the lines with a foot-tapping instrumental score in the background, you are shown monotonous black-and-white shots of pretty women, for the most part, smiling, frowning, and at one point, even yelling " this last visual perhaps best summarising the tone of the lines. The overall focus of the video, seemingly unintended, is more on alienation than liberation. This is never more evident than in the lines: "My songs, your noise. My order, your anarchy. Your sins, my virtues." You are given what seem like ultimatums. "My love for you cannot (be replaced), so treasure that!" You are also told in no uncertain terms not to "get cocky." It reaches a soaring high at "I'm the snowfall. You're the snowflake." The theme is clear: me versus you, woman versus man. Well, how about woman AND man?