Tina Dutta offended by “Dear” - Page 3

Deep down a person acts or reacts to vibes he is getting from person

Point no 1 - Fandom is generally “Paltu Pyaaz” …. The opinions change based on who is involved rather that what is said

Point no 2 - Keeping Tina out of the topic and just focusing on the word “Dear”… In English speaking countries using “Dear” in written communication is normal but in verbal lingo used normally for kids or strictly for someone you are close to( not randomly)….the same goes for Hindi equivalent “Priyah” by and large

Point no 3 - How you would like to be addressed in a civil conversation is your prerogative.Even before calling someone who is not close/known to me by first name in a verbal convo , I seek permission .

Sallu stopped Upen from calling him “Bhai” midway through the season because of Upen’s behaviour.Sajid politely told Saundarya not to call him Sajid and use SK instead, because obviously she hasn’t played marbles with him …. In Shiv’s case he repeatedly called Tina by the word even after she told him he has lost the moral right to call her that……forcing something on is not cool ….he ended up looking like sadak chap mawalli …. In conclusion, the usage of “ Dear” is incidental in this case, it’s the behaviour that mattered

Point no 4 - Though I am cool with first name, I personally find the usage of word “Dear” repulsive when it is some random stranger or an acquaintance at the other end …. I would tell the person to STFU .., it’s my life, my call

Tina is very sophisticated 😳

Usse dear se bhi problem hain.call her her highness 😆

Brand tina ko sabka sabse problem hain aur woh khud ham sabke liye tv pe sabse bada problem😆

Originally posted by: MadOwhat

Point no 1 - Fandom is generally “Paltu Pyaaz” …. The opinions change based on who is involved rather that what is said

Point no 2 - Keeping Tina out of the topic and just focusing on the word “Dear”… In English speaking countries using “Dear” in written communication is normal but in verbal lingo used normally for kids or strictly for someone you are close to( not randomly)….the same goes for Hindi equivalent “Priyah” by and large

Point no 3 - How you would like to be addressed in a civil conversation is your prerogative.Even before calling someone who is not close/known to me by first name in a verbal convo , I seek permission .

Sallu stopped Upen from calling him “Bhai” midway through the season because of Upen’s behaviour.Sajid politely told Saundarya not to call him Sajid and use SK instead, because obviously she hasn’t played marbles with him …. In Shiv’s case he repeatedly called Tina by the word even after she told him he has lost the moral right to call her that……forcing something on is not cool ….he ended up looking like sadak chap mawalli …. In conclusion, the usage of “ Dear” is incidental in this case, it’s the behaviour that mattered

Point no 4 - Though I am cool with first name, I personally find the usage of word “Dear” repulsive when it is some random stranger or an acquaintance at the other end …. I would tell the person to STFU .., it’s my life, my call

I agree with everything you said. Point 4 is what I do too. I don’t mind anyone calling me by my first name even if we aren’t friends, but being called “Dear” would bug me if the person addressing me wasn’t dear to me at all! But I understand in India some people don’t understand the meaning and use it. So no offense intended ! Lol!

Originally posted by: Aps74

Meaning of “Dear” as per Oxford dictionary is “regarded with deep affection; cherished by someone.”

Many people in India don’t know this meaning and hence use it casually. They think it’s acceptable polite term. It’s equivalent to some stranger in your work place calling you “janeman, Janejigar” It won’t be appreciated!

That’s why I said one’s English has to be week if one incorrectly uses the term “Dear”.

With all due respect , I know

Oxford dictionary is a household item . Funny thing is my grandfather even used oxford dictionary .

And most people in india do know the meaning of "dear". Its not dt difficult to understand. And people use it out of affection only. See you might not consider a relationship enough affectionate to call you dear , but someone else might.

I dnt knw if u get my point. Like u might not feel a frnd has the ryt to call u dear but many people do. And those people know the meaning of dear very well.

What may not be acceptable to you , can be acceptable to others.

Originally posted by: Harish111

Just one thing to keep in mind here. The choice on how to react will always be with the person who receives and not person who says.

P..s i am just adding to your comment, not disagreeing to the point you are making

Absolutely

I agree to that

Originally posted by: Aps74

I didn’t mean to offend you, but if you are from such a background you must be aware calling anyone “dear” is not a nice thing. “Dear” is a term of endearment. Calling a stranger this is not at all polite. It’s actually patronising. Why would you want to second guess whether this stranger will feel offended by the term “dear” or not from a random stranger and call them that???? Please leave “Dear” for people with whom you have a loving relationship.
That’s what I am trying to explain. Tina felt offended and I get it coz I feel offended when some random person calls me “dear”. I love hearing it from my family and friends.., but not at all from anyone who I dislike. So Tina was right in getting irritated.

I never said Tina was wrong

I hv already said before.....once Tina objected to it , Shiv should hv stopped at once. If she didnt feel comfortable with it , she shouldnt hv been addressed wid it.

But dt doesnt mean people who arent proficient in english will be okay with use of "dear" by anyone and everyone. Dt is the part I hv an objection to . One shiv doesnt represent the whole indian population.

Adding to make it more clear.

See I am not saying .....you shouldnt hv objection to the usage of the word "dear" . You have the right to .But even a person who not so good at the use of english language.....can feel offended by the indiscriminate use of the word. While a person proficient in english ....might be okay with it.

Originally posted by: WhtsinAname

Like u might not feel a frnd has the ryt to call u dear but many people do. And those people know the meaning of dear very well.

What may not be acceptable to you , can be acceptable to others.

My dear 😅… it’s obvious you are not clear about the meaning Dear. Lol!


p.s- Dear here is *sarcasm* 😂

Originally posted by: Aps74

My dear 😅… it’s obvious you are not clear about the meaning Dear. Lol!


p.s- Dear here is *sarcasm* 😂

Its not at all funny

But I will quit this discussion here bcz clearly you feel u r more intellectual than the rest of us and dont find it necessary to prove my intellect to an internet stranger.

Originally posted by: Aps74

Few episodes back Tina flipped when Shiv referred to her a “Dear”! Had me grinning as it’s what annoys me too. In India many people refer to strangers and randomly call someone “Dear”. “Dear listen” “Dear no you can’t do this” “Dear please do this”

While it may not be exactly a rude thing to do but yes it sounds very stupid to call people you don’t find “Dear” as Dear” ! So dear is reserved for people you are genuinely fond of and very close to. Not thrown around casually! 😊

P.S - I support Tina in throwing a hissy fit over “Dear” from someone who is not a friend and certainly not Dear to her. 🤪

Dear hi bola na. Deer toh nahi.