What a cliche!

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SPuja

@SPuja

Rocker

Posted: 9 years ago

#11

Originally posted by: Missesha
This has been true in many cases too but usually not highlighted. Especially not in TV serials
In TV serials, it is always about a woman's dilemma of moving onto another relationship. But in reality many women desire to be in a relationship even if they are widows or divorcees.

Actually in TV serials also - but the woman has to be negative character - like what happened in Sa-Ja. Positive women characters hardly express their romantic feelings even when they are in love - perhaps due to patriarchal mindset of creatives.

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Missesha

@Missesha

Dazzler

+ 2

Posted: 9 years ago

#12

So far it has never been clear whether Anandi wants to remain single for the rest of her life or not.

The reason she doesn't miss a partner is because she has parked herself in a family where both she and her children can find like-minded people / friends, plus emotional support, security and readiness of Singhs to help out Anandi at any hour of need.

Besides that, she had the responsibility to find her lost daughter.

Hopefully, she now moves out of BH soon and starts living on her own. Be it emotionally, financially and mentally. Then we could determine whether she is really not looking for another partner / support or whether she feels a need.

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leavesandwaves

@leavesandwaves

Sparkler

+ 3

Posted: 9 years ago

#13

First of all, it is not possible for a single woman even in metros to have a single male friend without friends and relatives asking questions. Anant is not strictly single as he is living with his daughter and Anandi is also living with her kids. So they can carry on their friendship with their kids in tow.

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aparnauma

@GoodDoc_2105

Trailblazer

+ 4

Posted: 9 years ago

#14

Moral of the story is that a single woman doesn't feel the need for a partner or doesn't go around looking for a partner if she has a supportive family and circle of friends.

Just because of woman is single with kids to look after and she takes the support of the family that doesn't make her a woman who is incapable of looking after herself.

Single mother doesn't mean she has to reject all the support and help that is coming out of free will.

Singhs help her not because they feel that she is incapable but they love her.They do it out of their own love and affection and not because Anandi is forcing them to help her.

They have made Singhs take the place of Shekhars as well as Khazan and Bhago and that is because they want to tell a story about the relationship of Singhs and Anandi for them that is the centre piece as far as they are concerned.

Shiv was brought into Anandi's life through Dsa and Dsa was again made very important figure in Anandi's life through none other than Shiv's grand father Daddu whom Shiv looked upto and who was very dear to him.

The property given by Daddu to Anandi and the farm house that Shiv built are worth a lot.For all we know she may have sold them or may be living off the rents.

Shiv Niketan obviously has not developed over night. She was meeting minister to get funds for her projects and NGOs do depend on funds generated through donations.So where is the question of using her personal finances?

Just because her financial status has not been discussed how can it be assumed that she is living on charity?

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Vidya

@Shinya

Rocker

Posted: 9 years ago

#15

Originally posted by: libsrocks
Can two single person ever be just friends?
On one side Anant-Anandi's story might look entertaining and somewhat progressive (marriage in 40s) but on the other hand it also seems like a single man is bound to get attracted to a single woman!

Any single woman is bound to get cautious about her actions if all she attracts is romantic feelings from her so-called male friend! On one hand we say it's not wrong if Anandi spends time with Anant or seeks his company as a friend but on the other hand Anant's feelings have started becoming less-friendly/more-romantic! That is bound to make Anandi take a step back (when she gets to know his feelings) and question her alliance with single male friends in her life! It's wrong becoz that sends out a message that no widow/divorcee woman should seek friendship from other single man becoz all they will get is romanctic feelings at some point of their friendship! They just cannot enjoy a normal friendship
I really wish if CVs had not made Anandi-Anant's story follow the same old routine of man falling in love with woman! Why does admiration always take form of romance in such stories?

bold - that is not correct. Any single man is not bound to get attracted to any single woman... he must have come across many single women before he met anandi, but he wasnt attracted to them.

As per what he told his daughter, he finds anandi amazing, he said he never met a woman with so many good qualities in her... he actually loves her for her qualities. Not because she is single and beautiful.

The fact that anandi also talks to him freely, goes out with him for movies and dinners proves that she trusts him... the trust can develop into love. It has nothing to do with their singlehood.

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Awfulggt

@Awfulggt

Voyager

Posted: 9 years ago

#16

Originally posted by: Shinya

bold - that is not correct. Any single man is not bound to get attracted to any single woman... he must have come across many single women before he met anandi, but he wasnt attracted to them.

As per what he told his daughter, he finds anandi amazing, he said he never met a woman with so many good qualities in her... he actually loves her for her qualities. Not because she is single and beautiful.

The fact that anandi also talks to him freely, goes out with him for movies and dinners proves that she trusts him... the trust can develop into love. It has nothing to do with their singlehood.

Actually Dr. Anant was single for a very limited time. There's no chance he could have met many women in this short period after divorce. the very first woman he saw(possibly available, who fit in his age group), he fell in love with😳. what a...!

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aparnauma

@GoodDoc_2105

Trailblazer

+ 4

Posted: 9 years ago

#17

This Anant person was already having FBs of Anandi even before his divorce became final

and his daughter was begging Anandi to convince her parents to withdraw the divorce proceedings.

He was shown having feelings which went beyond friendship from very early on.

If he did not have these kind of thoughts from beginning and they developed gradually over a period of time while helping each other and interactions with each other then it would have been a different issue.

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dsupriya

@dsupriya

Dazzler

Posted: 9 years ago

#18

Interesting question- But the fact is society tends to make fun even when a single woman has a close friend with married man. And I am speaking from experience. Though luckily for me I was very friendly with his wife and she knew all about me. And we were quite open on friendship so insecurities and jealousies never arose. As we knew what it was all about.

Coming to your point, there is no harm if a single woman is a friend with single man and in TV Serials only I see more often that they introduce romantic angle like that of Anant having romantic interests. But as Shinya said not always you may have romantic inclination. We can happily be platonic and very good friends without all this romantic baggage which the serials generally show.

Unfortunately in society in general and at large, it is very difficult to fathom on why a man or a woman chooses to be single. The moment they see a single person, they will be after them to get married and seek companionship. Though it is laughable actually 😆 as life has no certainties. And invariable some time or other you end up single. It is very rare that both the partners will die at the same moment and time.

So TV serials also follow the same norm and when it comes to their lead they find it difficult to show how a single woman or man can still be contented. In the name of widow remarriage, or a divorcee remarriage or some other pretext they will introduce a new lead.

Not sure where BV is headed to but I feel they traversed away from the original purpose of Purnendu who wanted to show how a single woman becomes strong after a calamity like the husband death and progress from there. If I am not wrong all the articles mentioned that as main reason for bumping off Shiv. They soon went back to their TRP blockbuster😆 theme balika vadhu theme. Instead of making it a journey of balika vadhu Anandi they made it a balika vadhu theme which they may continue

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aparnauma

@GoodDoc_2105

Trailblazer

+ 4

Posted: 9 years ago

#19

Speaking from my experience as a single woman whose immediate family lives very far away I have to rely a lot on my friends for support in my day to day life.

I may be standing on my own two feet and eraning my own living but and financially as well as emotionally independent that doesn't mean that I don't need support at all.

Friends have become my support system over the years and many of them are males.S

So it is very much possible to be friends with males .

But over the years there have been instances where a couple of them had more expectations because of which we have drifted apart.

So if one person wants more from that friendship while the other person is content with just platonic friendship the chances are that they drift apart or they break up.It is quite rare for a friendship to continue if one of them is romantically inclined towards his/her friend while the other person doesn't share the same feelings.

o I don't really find it wrong if she takes the support which is offered by Jagya and Anant.

It is not like she is actively seeking support but it is more like she is taking what is offered to her.

Jagya knows where he stands with Anandi and Anant may not know where he stands.

As for Balika Vadhu have no issues if they want to revisit the original theme through another Balika Vadhu and take up more socially relevant issues through the family members of the new Balika Vadhu. Anandi is the main protaginist of the show and they cannot show anymore of issues of Balika Vadhu through her life so they have chosen to make Anandi's daughter as the next Balika Vadhu because of the connect that Anandi has with viewers.

They made Anandi's daughter a Balika Vadhu without her involvement and against her wishes so that they can make her struggles to get her daughter out of the mess both as a social activist who fights against child marriage and rehabilitates child brides and as a mother who is struggling to get her daughter back and give her the identity that is originally hers.

As for my understanding Singhs and now Anant are representatives of civil society made up of people with progressive minds and they are helping the social activist .Which is how it should be if one wants to bring changes in the mind set of people in order to change the society..

Back to the topic about man woman can't be friends -It would be nice if they show through Anandi that if a single mother is friends with a man that doesn't necessarily mean that she is looking for a relationship.Wanting to have fun and good times doesn't necessarly mean she is interested in a committed relationship.