Anandi's boundaries as a sarpanch - Page 12

Created

Last reply

Replies

249

Views

21.9k

Users

46

Likes

1k

Frequent Posters

718143 thumbnail
Posted: 13 years ago

Originally posted by: tinoo

AshBendre -- No I dont think it is good that Jyoti's parents are in jail. I think its terrible they are in jail.

I reserve comment on that till tomorrow.

ok i will wait..but i think they need to be punished severely for evil deed...or else how will it seep in them that whatever they did was utterly wrong?

Besides it would set very bad example for other villagers...as they will think one can go scot free even after being caught doing child marriage..

besides even gulli's parents were jailed untilt then gulli was under care of phooli n her parents...but look at gulli now...she has become so smart at school..
567043 thumbnail
Posted: 13 years ago

Originally posted by: tinoo

AshBendre -- No I dont think it is good that Jyoti's parents are in jail. I think its terrible they are in jail.

I reserve comment on that till tomorrow.



OH DEAR!!
Tinoo! This thread is going to be MOST contentious! And TERRIBLE for the well being of my nails!
You dont think law breakers/flouters should be punished?
What is the purpose of enacting laws if they shouldn't be applied?Merely enshrining them in the Penal Code did NOTHING to prevent Jyoti's parents from BREAKING it.
Commit the crime...then be ready to DO the time..else DO NOT BREAK THE LAW!
If you are worried about Jyoti's future-shouldn't her PARENTS given it a thought BEFORE they agreed to sell their daughter to the highest bidder?
Edited by znursingh - 13 years ago
Suchi- thumbnail
15th Anniversary Thumbnail Sparkler Thumbnail + 3
Posted: 13 years ago
I was thinking about this too about jyothi's parents being in jail... well if they do not go to jail then such practices will be stopped. Only when people start fearing that, they will be put to jail , will they actually stop.

For a bigger benefit such measures have to be taken
tinoo thumbnail
13th Anniversary Thumbnail Rocker Thumbnail
Posted: 13 years ago
You know, i see this entire thing as a complete and total failure on Anandi's part.
I really believe that authoritarian measures and fear based tactics can only go so far (whether in governmental activities or in parenting matters)... after a while they are ineffective. The only real solution is for people to actively want to obey the law because they see how it benefits them and how it is a good thing ... not a hindrance.
My belief (based on what I saw yesterday and today) is that anandi goes around talking about child marriage based on what has happened to her. Her personal story. A lot of people will just mock her and see her as a one-off example of how child marriage can go awry, and nobody will really listen to her when there are several examples of good working child marriages in front of their eyes (e.g. lal singh and koyel, or jyoti's own parents, etc. etc. etc.). They have all grown up in child marriages and really see nothing wrong in them. Infact, anandi too might not have seen anything wrong in it, or processed it as an issue if she and jagya had had a happy marriage.
To hold up gulli as an example or someone else like gulli, is really ridiculous because the parents wont really see any benefit in someone who avoids marriage to become an assistant teacher in a school room in a village...nor was unmarried teacherji a great role model.
Within these cultures, marriage is a form of social protection, since anti-social elements prey on single women.. From this perspective, Jyoti's parents *were* thinking in the best interests of their daughter in terms of settling her in a well-to-do household. Now it may not be the way I would judge the best interest of my daughter, and it may not be the way that someone else would judge the best interest of their daughter ... but it was Jyoti's parents way. In addition, they were not selling her off, they were genuinely interested in seeing her married. (The law makes a distinction when it judges parents by the way -- if it is found that parents were selling her -- then parents are punished under child trafficking and child prostitution acts which can lead up to 10 years of life imprisonment -- but it is found that parents were genuinely marrying the girl -- then penalty is 2 years)
Complex ivory tower notions of how women are to have their own identity and how they have to blossom to their full potential to become teachers and social workers will have no impact on these people. What educated role models have they seen who are both married and successful? None.
What do they see? -- an unmarried teacherji? an abandoned and divorced anandi? a natha lady phooli with a graduate degree who now is a single mother working in a school? a teenage girl who is an assistant teacher in a school and still not married?
Tomorrow, if jyoti's parents died in a tractor accident somewhere, they would die peacefully knowing that the girl was "settled" rather than still unmarried and orphaned at the mercy of anti social elements.
Tomorrow, if jyoti's parents let her study and become successful, they need to know that they can find a man for her in their community -- we may say that she can have a love marriage, she may meet someone in her college, -- but from jyoti's parents mentality this may not be acceptable.
If anandi is to be successful in her agenda, she has to stop talking about her own personal story and tailor her marketing strategy in terms of benefits to the parents.
And for those who say that the fear of the law is the most potent medicine against child marriage ...and that parents will be scared because jyoti's parents will be arrested. I disagree. Since this is a serial, it works that way and I respect the storyline.
In real life, it is the other way around, within 48 hours of this, the groom's father would have arranged to have anandi and shiv assassinated (and he would have given these orders from jail). After that sarpanches, and district collectors would be scared to interfere in child marriages.
Dont you see IPS officers, and income tax officers being murdered in India? A handful of people who are really committed to the cause may give their life for it ... but other government officials may just prefer to turn a blind eye rather than take on the wrath of anti-social elements on themselves and their families.
Edited by tinoo - 13 years ago
tinoo thumbnail
13th Anniversary Thumbnail Rocker Thumbnail
Posted: 13 years ago

Originally posted by: znursingh

[

OH DEAR!!
Tinoo! This thread is going to be MOST contentious! And TERRIBLE for the well being of my nails!
You dont think law breakers/flouters should be punished?
What is the purpose of enacting laws if they shouldn't be applied?Merely enshrining them in the Penal Code did NOTHING to prevent Jyoti's parents from BREAKING it.
Commit the crime...then be ready to DO the time..else DO NOT BREAK THE LAW!
If you are worried about Jyoti's future-shouldn't her PARENTS given it a thought BEFORE they agreed to sell their daughter to the highest bidder?

znursingh -- I do not believe that authoritative tactics that generate fear-based listenting to the law ever work in the long run. Social change just does not occur that way -- particularly in terms of dealing with long standing social traditions.
So, I believe that mindsets have to be changed where people feel that listening to the law enhances them, not takes away something from them. They should want to obey the law voluntarily.
I said this in my previous post -- jyothi's parents ARE thinking about her future -- from their own mindset. In addition, they did not sell her. This was a valid 'marriage' (from a notional standpoint) -- it was not a child trafficking activity. Her parents were wealthy and had bought lots of jewellery and household items as gifts for jyothi. They were not selling her for their own financial monetary benefit.
tinoo thumbnail
13th Anniversary Thumbnail Rocker Thumbnail
Posted: 13 years ago
thanks bluerobin for 'liking' my post 😆😆 I really thought i would get only brickbats.
you are a sweetheart 🤗
..Tangled.. thumbnail
14th Anniversary Thumbnail Dazzler Thumbnail + 3
Posted: 13 years ago
i totally disagree.anandi did the right thing.
bluerobin thumbnail
13th Anniversary Thumbnail Sparkler Thumbnail
Posted: 13 years ago

Originally posted by: tinoo

thanks bluerobin for 'liking' my post 😆😆 I really thought i would get only brickbats.

you are a sweetheart 🤗



Thank you. I actually start laughing whenever you remind me of my crocodile girgit story , suvve rakhee shiv brother of anandi 😆.

I really liked your post . IPS officers are mercilessly killed because the culprits know that they can easily get away and nobody fears the law here . As you said people need to change their mindset. People should be made aware what their child can achieve if they don't get her married at such an early age . It would be better if anandi with shiv organise some awareness programmes stating the demerits of child marriage ( teen pregnancy, high infant and maternal mortality rate ) , street plays etc . It will not be possible for anandi to investigate and find out which parents are going to get their small children married , run to stop child marriages . Practically its not possible as you said. Keep enlightening people like me with your posts :)
Edited by bluerobin - 13 years ago
..Tangled.. thumbnail
14th Anniversary Thumbnail Dazzler Thumbnail + 3
Posted: 13 years ago

Originally posted by: tinoo

znursingh -- I do not believe that authoritative tactics that generate fear-based listenting to the law ever work in the long run. Social change just does not occur that way -- particularly in terms of dealing with long standing social traditions.
So, I believe that mindsets have to be changed where people feel that listening to the law enhances them, not takes away something from them. They should want to obey the law voluntarily.
I said this in my previous post -- jyothi's parents ARE thinking about her future -- from their own mindset. In addition, they did not sell her. This was a valid 'marriage' (from a notional standpoint) -- it was not a child trafficking activity. Her parents were wealthy and had bought lots of jewellery and household items as gifts for jyothi. They were not selling her for their own financial monetary benefit.

chidl marriege is just too wrong.did you see jyoti's father in law?!! will a good parent send their daughter in such a house? noo! child marriege itself is a big crime.his about to be father in law tried to kill anandi!
tinoo thumbnail
13th Anniversary Thumbnail Rocker Thumbnail
Posted: 13 years ago

Originally posted by: AshBendre

[
besides even gulli's parents were jailed untilt then gulli was under care of phooli n her parents...but look at gulli now...she has become so smart at school..

AshBendre -- This is *exactly* my point ... from jyothi's parents perspective -- gulli is not somebody to be admired ... she is somebody to be pitied.
anandi to is not somebody to be admired... she is somebody to be pitied.
Are you not seeing how it is from their particular filters??
It is not your filters or my filters ... where we see gulli's or anandi's achievements as something desirable and worthy of being applauded.
For them, they are wealthy individuals, and their daughter will be getting married into a wealthy home. They dont see why jyoti needs to study when she will not need to work in the future. (this is the old dadisa mentality)...
This mentality has to be changed.

Related Topics

Top

Stay Connected with IndiaForums!

Be the first to know about the latest news, updates, and exclusive content.

Add to Home Screen!

Install this web app on your iPhone for the best experience. It's easy, just tap and then "Add to Home Screen".