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Ok so i'm not new on this forum! Just a silent reader ( i do comment now and then). But i finally decided to break this silence and write something on this adorable pair. Hope you like it đ
Funny it is! Earlier i used to be jealous of her never ending smiles thinking her life is just perfect and now her every frown pains me!
I sighed looking at her face from across the room. She looked so lost, so broken that i wanted nothing more than to take her in my arms and keep her there for the rest of my life. Fortunately or unfortunately i was not the reason this time!
"Sakshi" i called her hoping for her to spring up from her seat but my loud baritone did nothing to break her line of thoughts.
She looked so much like the arjun rawte i was before i finally killed sikander and put my anger to rest. Though i was still as guity as before and thought that i have no reason to live anymore sakshi taught me to still live, to live for the people who care for me, love me, my etf team and she taught that regardless of whoever i loose i should still live because life is all about chances and i dont know when i will get to meet someone who'll become a crucial part of my life.
I looked at her again wishing i could do something to reduce her pain then i shook her out of her reverie. She looked up at me and for that one ungaurded moment i could see a life's worth of pain in her eyes. I swallowed the lump forming in my throat and signalled her to come to my cabin.
As i sat she looked at me from across the table then suddenly commented "kya hua arjun mujhe aisa kyo lagra hai ki tum jabse kuch soche jaa rahe ho aaj toh koi case bhi ni hai". Worried lines formed on her forehead. She was worried for me even now when she went through so much just 15 days ago.
"Kuch nahi" i said staring "sochra hu ki tumhari smile kaha chali gayi". This got me one of her full fledged smiles though it was fake and the shining in her eyes was not out of happiness but the tears that were secretly forming in them.
I still stared at her unflinchingly and eventually her big smile subdued to a small one and then to nothing as she realised her facade wont work on me!
"Umm wo...kaam hai mujhe main abi aayi" she said and hurriedly left.
I felt anger rising in my chest seeing her like this. Why cant she for once share her pain. Why cant she for once stop smiling for others and instead cry for her ownself. She wants to take the whole worlds pain away but cant for once try to nurture her own wounds.
I stood up remembering her face when that phone call came. It was another hectic day at etf and we were all sitting in the conference room when suddenly her phone rang causing me to glare at her. She threw an apologetic look and was about to cut the call when her face drained of all color and she shakingly picked up the call. Then a voice said something and the phone slipped out of her hand. I without wasting anytime picked it up.
"Hello, main arjun rawte sakshi ka dost, aapne aisa kya kaha jo wo suddenly aise shock mai chali gayi hai" i demanded still looking at sakshi.
"Ji wo actually inke bhai amar anand ki border pe ladte waqt maut hogayi hai" the voice said. I cut the phone shocked. Not because her brother died but because she had a brother in first place.
Later, much later when i had asked her she told me that though she had already lost her parents to a car accident she still had a brother in army who she never got the time to tell about. She lost him too and i can completely understand how she felt after loosing the last person she could call her own and that is why she looked to me like another arjun rawte who hid herself behind a well practiced facade.
"Sakshi" i said shaking her and she suddenly stood up and ran out without a second glance.
As i had followed her out and been there for her all the time when she was mourning over her brothers loss just like she had been there after sikanders death i knew that she did not shed a single tear just stayed curled up on her bed deep in thoughts. I once even left her alone (not actually) thinking she will breakdown in solitude but well that is what i thought.
I decided i had to do something pretty soon to get the sakshi back i know and i want to see. The sakshi who was always happy and smiling, asking random questions and cracking poor jokes. The sakshi who brought roshni's arjun back in this world and who brought a smile to his face again and again. The sakshi who broke my barrier and became the first friend i ever really accepted after roshnis death , the sakshi who i fell in love with!
Funny it is! Earlier i used to be jealous of her never ending smiles thinking her life is just perfect and now her every frown pains me!
Later when i was dropping her home i glanced at her time and again trying to gauge her mood. As we reached her home and she got down i stepped down from the car too. She threw me a questioning glance but i just told her to proceed. From car to her gate she was again and again looking at me as if expecting me to finally realise what i was doing and leave but i stood my ground.
As we entered her two floor house it all screamed sakshi. From the grassy green and white theme of the drawing room to bright red and white of kitchen, to the various photos of her family and etf members , to the white tiles with quotes written engraved on walls and the huge vases in corners with artificial flowers in them. It was all so full of life that it only made me sadder looking at Sakshi who seemed dead to me.
"Arjun, tum yaha i mean kuch baat hai" she asked concerned.
"Kyo main tumhare ghar nahi aa sakta?" I asked giving her an amused look
"Aa sakte ho par pehle kabhi aaye ni naa" she said a little relieved. Afcourse i have come during the time her brothrr died. I came everyday but i don't think she even remembers that.
"Kya hua sakshi tum pehle iti khush rehti or ab... "O..or ab ab bhi toh khush he rehti hu main" she cut me off not really meeting my eyes.
"Or ab tum khush rehne ka natak karti ho" i said completing my sentence. She looked up tensed her face clear of any smile or pretense.
"Nahi wo..um tum cutting chai pioge" she asked suddenly. I sighed "sakshi kab tak aise pretend krogi ki sab kuch theek hai? Kab tak apna pain inn smiles ke peeche chupaogi? or kyo? Kabhi kabhi apne dard ko orro ke sath batna, usse aasuon ke roop me nikal dena chaheeye warna andar he andar ghut jaogi tum" I said angry on her
"Arjun patani kya kehre ho. Main khush hu, jab koi dard hai he ni toh nikalne ki baat kaha se aa gayi"
"Acha" i said getting up then pushing her up i held her both arms "khush ho tum? Toh kyo jab bhi main tumhari taraf dekhta hu toh mujhe tumhari aankho mein sirf dard dikhta hai, kyo jab bhi tum akele bethi hoti ho toh patani kaha kho jati hu, kyo mujhe tum mein mere ateet ki jhalak dikhti hai" i shouted
"Patani" she said pushing me off "or waise bhi tumhe kya farak padta hai main khush houn ya dukhi? Kisi ko bhi farak nahi padta" she said slowly at the end
"Farak padhta hai sakshi or ye baat tum ache se jaanti ho. Mujhe tumhari har baat se farak padta hai. Warna kaise hasna seekh gaya main. Kaise jeena seekh gaya. Tumne sikhaya hai or ab tumhari baatein main tumhe khudko ni bhulne dunga" i said calmly she looked defeated, tired. "Ghar jaao arjun" saying this she turned away from me but i was not having any of it. I took hold of her arms again pushing her towards me. "Kahin nahi jaa raha main or naahi tumhe jaane dunga" i cupped her cheeks slightly caressing them "please sakshi tum abhi bhi denial meh jee rhi ho. Aise pretend krri ho jaise kuch hua he nahi hai. Par aisa nahi hai. Tumhara bhai mar chuka hai. Tumhari puri family jaa chuki hai. Tum.."
"Stop it arjun" she shouted pushing me but i didn't budge still holding her. "Jaao yaha se" she said hitting me on my chest but as she tried to fight me off she eventually got tired and then a tear slipped out of her eyes. Then another. She started sobbing while i held her quietly.
She kept hitting me venting it all out. "Sab chale gaye. Mummy, papa, bhai, kisi ko koi farak ni padta. Maine kaha tha bhai se ki army naa join krre. Usse kuch hogaya toh mera kya hoga par..par wo..nai mana" saying this she slipped to the floor taking me down by my shirt. We sat there both on our knees as she tried to still fight me but then kept her forehead on my chest holding my shirt and crying.
Her next words made me freeze on the spot. "Tum bhi chale jaaoge sabki tarah. Ek insaan se pyaar kia or wo bhi mujhse pyar ni karta. Iti buri hu main?" She said suddenly looking up. He innocent face, her questioning eyes with so much pain and longing. As if searching for someone she could call her own.
Suddenly i felt fiercely possessive of this girl in my arms. Her innocence, tears and pain wanting me to protect her. I firmly cupped her cheeks intensely looking into her eyes trying to tell all that i was feeling. Trying to tell her that i will never leave her, ever.
"Main kahi nahi jaa raha! Naa ab or na kabhi or" and though i knew this was not the right time to say this but still i did "i love you sakshi and I'll never leave you" maybe because i wanted her to know she was not alone and never will be but her reaction shocked me as she pushed me and walked a step or two back to put distance between us.
I too stood up gazing at her trying to decipher what was going in her mind.
"Samajhte kyo ho tum apne aapko? Tumhe pata hai tumhari problem kya hai arjun, ki tumhe lagta hai tum sab kuch jante ho. Ki tum jo bhi karte ho wo hamesha sahi he hota hai. Par aisa nahi hai mr arjun suryakant rawte kyoki jo aap abhi kar rahe haina wo bhaut galat hai"
I looked at her completely lost and confused "kya kar raha hu main" i asked
"aap meri taraf apni sympathy ko pyaar ka naam de rahe hain. Mujhpe daya karke mujhe apne pyaar ki bheek dere hain. Arjun maine jab tumse pyaar kia toh uske sath iss fact ko bhi accept kia ki tum kabhi mere nahi ho sakte. Par aaj tumne ye jhoota pyar dikhake mujhe bhaut hurt kia hai, arey agar mujhe console karna he tha toh ek dost banke bhi toh kar sakte the ye dikhawa kyo"
Her tear stained face looked at me with an accusation i couldn't handle but still i controlled myself thinking that i've never given her a reason to think otherwise. I've never showed how much i love her.
"Sakshi tum..."
"Main kya arjun. Islie main kabhi kisi ko apna dard nahi dikhati, kyoki log sirf daya karna jaante hai wo humara dard dekhke hume aise treat Karne lagte hai jaise hum alag hai jaise hum meh koi kami hai par.."
"Stop it sakshi" i thundered. Her tagging my love as sympathy again and again hurt me to no end. I holded her upper arms in a painful grip but i couldn't care less.
"Tum jab har pal mera sath deti thi, roshni ki maut ke dard se bahar laane ki koshish karti thi toh daya karti thi mujh par haa? Maine tumse pyaar ka izhar islie nai kia kyoki main tumpe daya karta hu balki islie kia kyoki main tumse sach meh pyaar karta hu" i pushed her away then
"i expected better sakshi. Mujhe laga tum samajhti ho mujhe. Par nahi shayad tum apni insecurities meh itni andhi ho gayi ho ki tumhare around kya chalra hai tumhe ye realise he nai ho raha. Kya nahi dikhta tumhe ki kitna badal gaya hu main. Hasne laga hu. Or ye sab sirf tumhari wajah se. Toh batao mujhe, wo sab bhi tumpe daya khaake kar raha hu main"
"Fine, nahi chaahti na ki tumhare sath rahu nahi rahunga" I shook my head disappointed and stepped back to leave but as i turned around my mind changed and i looked at her again looking at the floor deep in thought.
"You know what" she snapped her head up at my voice " nahi jaaunga main, tumhara toh plan he yehi thi mujhe khudse dur karna, par main tumhe kaamiyaab nahi hone dunga" i said and plopped up on the sofa taking my phone out and started playing angry birds on it.
Her eyes widened in shock seeing my sudden change in mood and silly antics but i ignored her.
"Arjun?" She asked questioningly but i still ignored indirectly showing her that i was still angry.
"Arjun tum mujhe mere ghar meh bethke ignore nahi kar sakte" she said. I looked at her then raising my eyebrows as if saying watch me.
"Fine" she said angrily and turned around to go but i caught hold of her wrist causing her to fall on my lap with her head in the crook of my neck and her hands tightly holding my shoulders. She immediately looked up gazing in my eyes and we couldn't take our eyes off each other. Her hairs seemed to be irritating her and that irritated me. I tucked the strands behind her eyes and felt an immediate shudder in her body.
"Arjun" she whispered as i caressed her cheek. She fluttered her eyes shut her chest going up and down as her heart beats increased. My hand then wavered to her neck feeling her soft skin while the other one was tucked firmly around her waist.
"Sakshi? Aakhen kholo" i asked in a deep raspy voice. Her browns opened to look into mine silently asking if i'd meant all that i said and in reply i locked my lips to her tightening my hold around her as my other hand crawled into her hairs holding her head according to my wish. As my hard lips touched her soft ones a shudder went down both our bodies. Her surprising gasp gave me a chance to plunge my tounge down her mouth. As i licked every corner of her mouth she moaned in pleasure hardening me instantly.
what started as an innocent kiss initiated to prove my love turned into one passionate and full of hunger. She tasted like red strawberries juicy and sweet. Fresh and wild. We finally broke off in need of air. As our breathing returned to normal i looked at her. She was a beautiful sight with red cheeks , swollen lips and hairs all over the place.
"Ab koi doubt" i asked with mischief in my eyes and in reply she just hid her face shyly in my chest but what i didn't miss was her beautiful smile, a real one though. Finally!
Ok done! đł
I know this was very long and very boring but even if by chance you did like it please let me know by liking and commenting and in case you are one of those silent readers who don't like to do that then i really can't do anything about it since well this is a oneshot and i can't threaten you by saying that i won't update and bla bla so ya it's completely your call.
I can say that the people who'll like and comment (specially comment) will get a pm for my next ff whenever that is.
Ok so sorry for the typos and for eating your heads off by my blabbering. đ
Okthanksbye! đ
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Kyunki Saas Bhi Kabhi Bahu Thi 2
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