Confusing Abuse with love ...IG post and a reflection wrt show - Page 2

I agree with all of you.

This is not what we signed up for. Even if they gave into online audiences’ demand of love story, there was no written rule that led them to focus on just one thing. They could’ve shown them handling their fears/traumas together AND their professional growth.

Many kept asking this track to be shown but all they stuck to drama.

I understand that the regional audience base is different and the PH probably cannot show the same storyline, but that doesn’t stop them from showing sensible drama. By showing all this, they are pretty much - a) undermining all those who have broken free from such toxicity (be it in a relationship or professional setup) and b) making a mockery out of such a sensitive yet extremely real topic.

Given this show has a wide reach and many draw inspiration from it, it is highly silly of makers to show something like this.

Friendship or personal issues should never come in the way. If that was all, then they should’ve drifted from the “social msg” bit to out and out drama (I guess that is what they are doing right now) and trying to change their “basic essence”. Whether it will fall apart or continue, I guess only time will tell but it will definitely leave a lot of sourness amongst many. They should thank their stars that no one has really taken it against them for handling such sensitive topics in the worst way possible.

I guess many of us (incl me) will be very salty for the way they’ve shown all of this, especially if this was all his mum’s story. Highly disappointing and triggering.

Originally posted by: strancho

I wish there was an applause reaction.

Pompy, will it work??😊

Originally posted by: -MOTHER-

But then the hero demanded a change in script. The Bada admi track was brought and it totally ruined Anupama and Anuj. To justify the abuse meted by the hero MaAn were sacrificed. Wo Ghatiya Nahin Hain was the begining of the end of Anupama's journey towards finding her ground.

I, for the life of me, can never really understand, why did they continue with the story when the hero had so many issues? They could’ve easily ended that part of the story and returned with something else. Why put all the efforts and money to waste?

If this wasn’t enough, they came up with an OTT only prequel that made matters worse. It is by far one of their grave mistakes.

But they will still make sure the show runs - with a leap most likely and will constantly try to move into drama category. They are never seeing 4+ again and def never coming back to track - now even if they try. This show is def not worth ruining mental peace. MaAn can only try so much. Because at the end of day, even they are not above the show (you need to be Ambuja cement or Asian paints😂😭)

First of all, don't be sorry for spreading awareness or sharing your opinion as this is a free forum for all. Makers should be sorry and everyone should blame them for spreading negativity not u or anyone who tries to address what a mockery they have made of abuse and survivors.

I am yet to read everyone's opinions on this but will share something from my own experience. Sometimes these survivors experience guilt for moving on. And whenever the guilt overpowers logical thinking, they get pulled back into toxicity for giving it one more chance to ruin them further. I just want to mention that they don't do it out of love for the abuser but because they are groomed by their narcissist manipulators to always sympathize and try to find an excuse for the abuse instead of considering it WRONG by all means.

Originally posted by: ektag06

If this wasn’t enough, they came up with an OTT only prequel that made matters worse. It is by far one of their grave mistakes.

Even if they came up with a prequel why to show things that you wont give any closure? I really want some famous personality to speak up. Common people crying and cribbing on twitter won't make them even notice. If these kind of content would have been shown in other Asian countries specially SK, people would have made sure that the PH is doomed.

Originally posted by: Koms9

First of all, don't be sorry for spreading awareness or sharing your opinion as this is a free forum for all. Makers should be sorry and everyone should blame them for spreading negativity not u or anyone who tries to address what a mockery they have made of abuse and survivors.

I am yet to read everyone's opinions on this but will share something from my own experience. Sometimes these survivors experience guilt for moving on. And whenever the guilt overpowers logical thinking, they get pulled back into toxicity for giving it one more chance to ruin them further. I just want to mention that they don't do it out of love for the abuser but because they are groomed by their narcissist manipulators to always sympathize and try to find an excuse for the abuse instead of considering it WRONG by all means.

Exactly. Wanna share a personal experience. Whenever I or my brother say that we wont eat today for whatever reason, my mom would come and plead to us that please eat or offer us that she will make something that we like. When I started having little sense, I told her one day that she should not do that. If we say we wont eat, she should say make your own food then. It took me so much time to make her realize that being a mom does not mean she has to give up her individuality. Yes she gave birth to us but that does not mean she does not have any right to happiness or any choice. But I am glad she has changed a lot and work is in progress.

Now that she does not do that, she told me she thought that a mother has to do that and it was kind of a basic thing like oxygen and water

Originally posted by: -MOTHER-

According to Maslow's pyramid of human needs, physiological needs(food, rest) followed by security needs ( housing, clothing) are basic needs of humans. Once these needs are met growth needs(self respect, sense of accomplishment, privacy, freedom to choose) arises. Unfortunately less than 1% of all woman has the privilege to basic human rights. Even women belonging to middle class and upper class are reminded regularly that their basic needs are fulfilled by their father, husband and son. So it's not unnatural for them to accept any kind of behavior meted to them by their providers. For thousands of years the thought that because of the men in our lives we got a roof above our head and food in our plate have been embedded in women's brain. This thought has spread it's root so deep that erupting it requires a massive amount of energy. Such a form of energy only appears after an earth shattering jolt. V was always a provider to Anupama. He has always fulfilled her and her kids deficit needs and he always reminded her that she is thriving because he is letting her to thrive. Her love, concern, respect for V stemmed from the physical security he provided her. V is a accha pita because V fed her kids, provided them good education. V not teaching her kids moral values, not giving them emotional support, not seeing them as individual. human beings are of no concern to her as these things are abstract to her. You can't crave what you did not taste. She never tasted respect, love, sense of individualism so she never craved them. Once she started working with Anuj she saw a completely different aspect of life. The job ensured fulfilment of her basic needs. She slowly gained the confidence that she is capable of making a roof above her head and bringing food to her table. Anuj treated her as an individual, her opinions mattered to him, her choices were appreciated, her boundaries respected. Once you taste respect you realize it tastes a hell lot better than anything you ever tasted. A person who has once tasted respect can never swallow insult. So when V and Baa assassinated her character in front of children she left the house because by then she has tasted respect so she could not digest the insult. The Aage badh scene was an excellent depiction of the progression of her character. Anu living independently far from toxicity was the best phase of the show. It was inspiring on so many levels. But then the hero demanded a change in script. The Bada admi track was brought and it totally ruined Anupama and Anuj. To justify the abuse meted by the hero MaAn were sacrificed. Wo Ghatiya Nahin Hain was the begining of the end of Anupama's journey towards finding her ground.

Love your post yaar ❤️ ... Wish we could show it to the writers to remind them what they had originally started with , do they even remember? Not that they’ll care , as RG says everyone here is puppets in the hands of the almighty PH ... I think BVs obsession with KGF and crows is probably a way of escapism from the trash they’re being forced to write 🤣

It’s also imp to note that in this case Anu had the good fortune to have a friend like Devika as a rock solid support , many family members like Dolly , Samar ( purposely not mentioning Bapuji here ) who openly went against their own blood to support her and finally Anuj as the perfect soulmate to give herself a second chance ... Her own mom also seems much sorted and cool now ... Most ppl are not that fortunate ... yet her incessant crying for her fake Maika and sprouted-out-of-nowhere Sasuraal is so idiotic !!!

Originally posted by: strancho

Even if they came up with a prequel why to show things that you wont give any closure? I really want some famous personality to speak up. Common people crying and cribbing on twitter won't make them even notice. If these kind of content would have been shown in other Asian countries specially SK, people would have made sure that the PH is doomed.

Even when there is collective outrage , the PH conveniently addresses the issue they want , while ignoring the rest . During STOP Ruining Anupama trend , a lot of tweets were against Vanraj and Baa ... did it stop the makers from making her do Kanyadaan or zoooming into his face at very inappropriate moments during the wedding ceremony ?? !! NO ... RG at length kept giving excuses about length of Mahendi , while most people were upset with the fact that it had Baa’s name and not the actual design ....

I don’t think the actors are particularly happy about certain things ( Nidhi has finally spoken out about her dissatisfaction ) but at the end of the day it’s a powerful PH and it’s their bread n butter so most have no option but to keep shut ....

That's how abuse is normalised isn't it? The concept of accha and bura insaan is soo skewed and subjective.

Let's take Vanraj for example. He's a very realistic character, men are like that, and they are normalised by women. If we remove the ema angle then everything he did can be justified by "but he isn't an addict, doesn't beat you (physically), loves his parents and children, aur kya chahiye?"

The overall expectations of society with men is sooo low that not being a wife beater is a badge of honor.

Anuj on the other hand is highly unrealistic and fictional character. Yes he gives us hope, and we all want Anuj. But as women, it's more feasible and important to vow to raise one.

Originally posted by: ga1986

Even when there is collective outrage , the PH conveniently addresses the issue they want , while ignoring the rest . During STOP Ruining Anupama trend , a lot of tweets were against Vanraj and Baa ... did it stop the makers from making her do Kanyadaan or zoooming into his face at very inappropriate moments during the wedding ceremony ?? !! NO ... RG at length kept giving excuses about length of Mahendi , while most people were upset with the fact that it had Baa’s name and not the actual design ....

I don’t think the actors are particularly happy about certain things ( Nidhi has finally spoken out about her dissatisfaction ) but at the end of the day it’s a powerful PH and it’s their bread n butter so most have no option but to keep shut ....

Nothing is gonna be addressed. Maximum they would take would some months leap and show Anupama handling everything. All growth done in a fraction of seconds.