Anupama responsible for anuj decision

OK all of us wanted to enjoy honey moon phase of maan with GK and Mukku may be for 6 months

But Creatives have sent Mukku packing and brought new cousins to trouble them and now a baby to adopt

I was thinking why anuj never felt need of own family for 45 years and now wants it as soon as he married anupama

For 27 years a man loves a woman like crazy and never ready to marry another woman give others his lovers place

For 27 years a man sacrificed having own kids thought his sister is his child his daughter and supressed all desires to have a family

Than he starts dating and marries woman of his dreams

But slowly he starts realizing this woman anupama does not love him like hhe loves her

anuj is just an option to anupama whom bapuji and vanraj permitted to marry hence she accepted him in her life

If bapuji and vanraj had not said accept him move on anupama would still not think of anuj as hubby

Anupama has never accepted anuj as lover or soul mate yet from how i see it as a viewer

When anuj realized that anupama only loves shahs baa, bapuji and her kids and even bachon ke pita and her grand child mom kinjal only more than him ever hes feeling left out insecure

He suddenly has realized this is not the dream lover or devi he thought she was who will care for him love him truly whole hearted the kind of dreams he thought from 27 years thats shattered to some extent now

Its easy to love someone from far and in dreams tough to love after knowing same person inside out

There is lot of difference in anuj and anupama whether education level, status, society behaviou, culture etc many hes always brought up with progressive woman like Mukku who are very independent educated can handle everything on own office or living alove travelling alonne unlike an aupama whose like a child needs terrible hand holding coaching as shes not exposed to outside life ever

Now his baby his daughter Mukku also has left for ever

GK is there but how long hes in 70s

Anytime anuj can become alone

Hence he wants someone only his own thats a child a daughter little anu

Also he sees how anu only talks about shahs and her kids, he feels without kids anupama may again run to shahs home long term

To ensure she stays with him hes taking this dice of adoption may be

Apart from fact that an adopted child gives him happiness of helping another child like him

It also ensures he ties anupama to himself and his house more than Shahs

I would blame anupama more for his adoption decision on honey moon than anuj

Because 27 years neither he missed family wife or kids Mukku was his only family and he was happy in Mukku only

There was no guarantee that anupama will come to his life yet he was so mad in love he decided i will stay bachelor all life no wife no kids only Mukkudi was his family and kid for last 20 plus years

Even Mukku married he never felt insecure alone for family because he knew Mukku is his only all life her kids too are his only she will always be his no matter shes alone or married or travelling etc Mukku made him feel secure although she was hardly with him last 10 years because he knew no matter hubby comes kids come his place in Mukku place will be high and same never change

Its like our fathers they know daughter will marry and go with hubby but they are not insecure that they lose daughter. Instead they gain daughter and her kids too as their own. Same for anuj with Mukkudi shes always his daughter and even if married shes his daughter only first. Mukku shall always treat him same all life whether married or not whether kids or not.

Problem is if wife (or husband) has another husband and wife has kids from other husband and you have no ex wife or kids from other wives also to claim as yours. Than human whether a man or woman get scared and insecure only. Specially when wife is so mad for ex sasural

But now shes with him his dream life that he thought if he had her is broken its back to reality boy

Staying with someone makes you realize dreams are different from reality

Anuj is enlightened enough now yes 2 days into marraige is too soon but some understand in few days that their dreams were not reality and never shall be

In little anu, anuj will see his both anupama whom he loved and his Mukku too

Because may be he realized he can never have a child with anupama shes not interested or cannot have own kids or whatever shes only interested in her 3 kids and shahs etc after all

Viewers are thinking why is anuj forcing child on 45 years old anupama who has 3 kids and a grand kid on way

No one is thinking anuj is lonely has no one not even anupama as his own does he not need someone if not now in old age to give him company take care of him in sickness fight for him if someone attacks him like shahs (mukku did that forhim so far future little anu will do)

When anupama saw vanraj and toshu snatching kapaida by tricks from anuj thru kukku she never took any action stayed silent

Baa bapuji stayed silent all shahs stayed silent

In subconcious anuj realizes hes alone no one to protect him from attacks by shahs all life

So he wants a family a child or 2 kids etc who are only his and no one elses who love him unconditionally and never leave him and support others

because till he married anupama he never felt need of family as mukku fulfilled that (mukku was hardly there in last 10 years too)

Now mukku left he understands anupama cannot take his mukku place or a real family place only kids can take that place and love and care for him unconditionally 100% may be so he wants kids

When you love someone all life like anuj has and that love is not reciprocated equally back you cannot imagine the pain a human an anuj feels(if this was real story) its like a big betrayal

Anupama will never stop her ba abapuji 3 kids vanraj jaap all life

Thank you devika you never told kavya gave divorce to vanraj or devi anupama would catch next flight to shah home from honey moon to console bachhon ka pita and tell kavya not to divorce her bacchon ke pita

So let anuj have some happiness atleast a kid or two as his own

Should he keep going to shah house to get humilated all life at functions because he has no family or what?

Anuj has made an intelligent decision for himself first time thinking of long term

Its not selfish of anuj as twitter and FD are saying its sensible as he realized fast anupama can never be his 100% or give him first place in her life over shahs

Also, she is the one who dragged him to an orphanage on their honeymoon. As if that's the most romantic place ever

Originally posted by: Harish111

Also, she is the one who dragged him to an orphanage on their honeymoon. As if that's the most romantic place ever

did she he went nooo in taxi

I have mixed views on this prem. Sorry do not know your name.

While agreed that there may be lots of differences in between Anu and Anuj, I think she can learn to love freely when she is given the space. Anuj listens to her and provides her his feedback too,rather than dictating a decision on her most times.

But yes there could be insecurities too, as being human. A child may feel like a way to bring your partner closer but is that correct? Lots of people have kids to help solve their issues, but does that help. I do not know.

In a way this point could be a great way to show male vulnerability without being too in your face.

Overall, I really liked your introspection from Anuj's point of view as afterall its a human character.

Anuj's vulnerability and insecurities is one of the plots I have always wanted the makers to explore as I have always felt that Anuj has sacrificed more in this relationship. Anupama's kids are not his own kids and can never be no matter whatever he does for them. Only if they have showed his longingness and may be little later it would have made sense. We have been shown that he always had just one dream: ANUPAMA.

They could have shown him feeling outsider when he is with the Shah/Kids and desires to have that same bond with his own kid. But ANUPAMA already took a contract of building a mandir in his name. Ab kya hi kar sakte hai.

I respect your opinion,however from where I am seeing Anu does love Anuj, you can't compare two partners love for each other just because Anuj waited for her for 27 years.I agree that maybe she wouldn't have realized her feelings for Anuj without Bapuji and Vanraj's interference...but she has become bolder in showcasing her love for Anuj with passing time.

She loves Anuj and shows her love to him in her own way.

And honestly, for the past 27 years,Anuj was not with her,not a part of her life, it was her inlaws and children only, so throwing them all away for Anuj doesn't make sense to me just because Anuj doesn't have any family,how is Anu at fault here?

She never told him to love me for 27 years,don't marry,don't have a family.

Anuj's desire to have a family of his own is not at all wrong,but then expecting the woman who has spent her entire life looking after a family and kids,in the process sacrificing her own dreams and happiness,her refusing to do anything more for having a family is also not wrong. If Anu doesn't want to take the responsibility of having another kid in her life,it's not wrong,plus having another kid for her, will increase the pressure more on her than Anuj since she already has three kids, and kids of any age,they usually aren't that welcoming for a step brother or sister...with great difficulty Toshu and Pakhi have accepted Anuj in their lives,but not compulsory they will welcome the new child as well.

nu shaadi anuj se nahi to nahi karti

Koi jabardarsti to nahi koi anu se 27 year se love kar rahe to anupama should bound to love and marriage that person

And anuj know it very well anu ki weakness shah है. Anupama jo khuch hai woh poori tarah anuj ke saamne hai anupama ka khuch bhi anuj ke saamne chhippa nahi hai he know it very very well before marriage

To yeh baat anuj ne 6 month ya 1year mein ache se anupama ka nature samakh liya hai aur agar baat acche se samjhane ke baad bhi agar anuj ne anupama se shaadi ki iska matlab yahi anuj ko anupama ka shah ghar mein jaame mein koi problem nahi other wise he has lot of time to rethink to marry anupama

Anu never told anuj ki usia ab shah parivaar se koi rushta nahi jub se main. Aap. Se mili hoon . Anupama already make it clear to anuj uska shah parivaar ae rishta bana rahega to anupama ne sub khuch clear kar diya so I dont think anupama anuj ke kisi baat ke liye responsible hai

और waise anupama ne anuj se shaadi kar liya. Real. Life mein koi aaakur kahe maine tumse 30 year se pyar kiya hai to pehli baat ro koi trust nahi karega yahi kaha jaayega 30 year se pyaar kiya ki nahi yrh kaun jaane

Real life mein to enquiry hoti phir shaadi hori

Ganimat hai anupama ne anuj ki koi aisi enquiry nahi kar wayi और anuj pe poora trust karke shaadi ki

OK since many are saying anupama has three kids so no more kids

They are not anuj kids they are shah kids they can never be given his name etc

Does that mean in world whoever had second marriage will not have kids from other spouse because they have children from first husband?

What sort of logic is this?

When you marry everyone knows what are duties of each spouse 1) take care in happy times and illness 2) To have a family basically kids

99.9% woman and men marry not to do some party they marry because they want a family and family does not mean spouse it means spouse and their kids

If both fail to have kids for medical reason they do surrogacy or adopt

You know few actors married second wife in 40 plus or 50 plus years and even wife were 35 or 40 plus

Did they not have kids from wife or husband although they have kids from first spouse ? (i do not want to name)

Why only anuj should sacrifice always?

Hes not saying give me my blood child as i am orphan i want my progeny with my DNA - any other husband will say same not only india full world all men want their DNA kid adoption is thought later if they cannot have

If anupama has so much problem even to adopt kids by anuj you should have told before, he may never marry or adopt before wedding so she cannot object etc

You cannot have a toss and say head also i will do as per my wish tail also i will do as i want

Family is all about compromise even between parents and kids or between siblings or spouses

If someone is too one way like vanraj or anupama marriage will break

I have never seen a one sided marraigfge than maan so far in ITV or movies or real life too where wife imposes all her and her ex spouse family will on a man just because hes alone and has no parents or grandparents to put across their family views (if hubby cannot)

Originally posted by: surabhi01

Anu never told anuj ki usia ab shah parivaar se koi rushta nahi jub se main. Aap. Se mili hoon . Anupama already make it clear to anuj uska shah parivaar ae rishta bana rahega to anupama ne sub khuch clear kar diya so I dont think anupama anuj ke kisi baat ke liye responsible hai

और waise anupama ne anuj se shaadi kar liya. Real. Life mein koi aaakur kahe maine tumse 30 year se pyar kiya hai to pehli baat ro koi trust nahi karega yahi kaha jaayega 30 year se pyaar kiya ki nahi yrh kaun jaane

Real life mein to enquiry hoti phir shaadi hori

Ganimat hai anupama ne anuj ki koi aisi enquiry nahi kar wayi और anuj pe poora trust karke shaadi ki

Before marrage a man can have affairs so can a wife not after wedding. After wedding you cannot go ex boy friend or ex hubby house its mental harassment case and even infidelity case

after marraige if wife keeps going to fathers house always no hubby will accept in USA forget asia or india

You have married means you are committed to your husband and his home majority time and he to you

If hubby puts case that anupama going to ex sasural it will be mental harassment law and illegal relationship law and keeping in touch with ex hubby too much after wedding can be criminal offence. Do you know laws across world you cannot keep visiting ex hubby house now and than on pertex you can get divorce on that basis or even be charged with civil offences. I know a case where hubby got divorce as wife always going to mother house forget ex hubby house , ex hubby house will become criminal offence actually. Why are you going to house where ex hubby there when you have another hubby? Its wrong socially morally and criminally too. Kids, kids are usually come and stay in mom house or few days a week court gives verdict. It never says ex wife should go and stay 5 days in ex hubby house for kids sake.