Antara's Diary..... 3rd to 7th Aug

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skeptical

@skeptical

Inactive

Posted: 16 years ago

3rd August

Dear Diary

It was in the night after dinner, that I was standing in my favourite place……..looking up at the sky. The lady who sings well was standing near me and was also looking out. But she didn't seem to look at the sky like me. She had some yellow paste on her face. She was not looking nice at all. What was she doing? Anyway me eyes were trained on the huge expanse of the sky.

I looked up to see the white moon's face

Clouds were about like ribbons and lace

Although it was indeed very far

My eyes were fixed on a twinkling star

And somewhere in that Milky Way

Mamma looks down at me and prays

That I may never live in fear

Why is Mamma never near?

Papa and Abhi were upto something. They wanted to photograph Abhi's mum. Papa and Abhi were upto something. They wanted to photograph Abhi's mum. There were some arguments and a lot of shuffling and whispering. Why !!! I think Papa and Abhi had hatched some kind of a conspiracy!!!

But need they disturb me when I look up at the moon? Don't they understand that it disturbs me? I like to see Mamma, for I know she is near the moon and the stars.

Papa has made a scrap book with the pictures of the people I know. Now why did he have to paste the picture of that irritating Billo? The less said about him the better. Anyway Papa showed me his picture with his name………… Yes I know Papa. Anyway. He showed me Abhi's mum's photo and says this is your Ma. Whooa!! That was not my mother. Mamma lived up in the sky. I got off the sofa and went to the balcony. I pointed out to the sky and said "Antara…Ma". I was very surprised. How could Papa make such a mistake? He didn't know what "Ma" was????

At the clinic, Vikram Uncle led me across the smooth floor. Another "didi"!!!!

People………people …….. and people. I was in a cross mood today. Why do so many people nag me? I pulled my hands away from hers. I wanted my everyday routine….. Was that too much to ask?

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skeptical

@skeptical

Inactive

Posted: 16 years ago

4th Aug

Dear Diary, I did not like the start of the session. The floor was horrible. I was screaming. But Didi and Vikram uncle calmed me down. She told me how to separate the beads according to their colours. Oh! That was interesting. I love beads....... remember I carry one in my rucksack? I love the feel of beads and thats why I have so many. Building blocks was a child's play. Could do it in a jiffy.......

But what's wrong with Papa? Why does he always show me that lady's picture and insist she is my mother? Who is this? Who is that? Imagine showing me a picture of that squeak. The last time I scared him. Foolish boy !!! Yawn........... really tired today because I played Jigs for a long long time. Good night.

Edited by skeptical - 16 years ago

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skeptical

@skeptical

Inactive

Posted: 16 years ago

5th Aug
Sorry folks............since I didn't see the serial yestdy, I didn't write the diary..

Edited by skeptical - 16 years ago

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skeptical

@skeptical

Inactive

Posted: 16 years ago

6th Aug

Dear Diary,
After the long session of cricket, we went home. All the children were playing together. I like Billo's father. He's really my best friend. Always talks nicely to me and treats me like a lady *giggle* . Oh………Papa has given Abhi a shower. And Abhi the chatterbox was asking question after question. Papa answered all his questions. He told him that I was special and that's why God had sent me to a home which had a wonderful boy who'd be my brother, look after me and love me forever. Y'know something? I really like Abhi, he was looking mighty cute today. Hair tousled and smelling of soap. He asked Papa why we didn't look similar. Papa took both of us to the mirror and said who said you don't look alike? He tweaked our noses and said the same eyes, the same chubby cheeks and two eyes….. Papa is wrong. I would rather have rosy cheeks and leave the chubby ones for Abhi. *hee hee*. But what did Abhi mean when he said what would have happened to me had I been in Billo's house? His mother would have beaten me….Why? Why would she beat me? I have done nothing to her yet she is always angry and cruel to me. I become pale when I think of her. But yesterday, Billo had offered me an olive branch. How times have changed!!!
Papa and I were 'studying'……I answered them correctly. The last question was about Abhi. Was he my bro? Abhi was standing in the doorway and was looking expectantly and nervously. What did he want me to say? Relax Abhi I am like you. Remember Papa told you we were alike? Then why are you so tense? But I was taking my time…..purposely. Finally I pointed to the 'yes' flashcard. Abhi was happy and he smiled widely. What fun I was having …….

Abhi came to my room in all new clothes. What was he wearing? A dhoti? He looked so cute….he grabbed my hand and took me to the living room where Papa and the rest were sitting. Abhi put out his hand and asked me to tie a rakhi on his wrist. I didn't know what this was all about. So Papa asked Arti bua to retie the rakhi on his wrist. I looked closely from the corner of my eye. Oh I got the idea. Papa handed the rakhi to me and I placed it on Abhi's hand. Ooops !! How do you tie a knot? Papa helped me do that. Abhi said he had no gift to give me. Billo made some suggestion about Love. What is Love? Then he started screaming as usual. He's really such a squeak!! But Abhi gave me a colour paints. Wow I love paints ….I love colours.

I was so excited I couldn't wait to try out the paints. Early in the morning, I took my brush and paints and began to draw creepers with pink buds and blooms on the walls of the landing outside our house. Everyone was astonished. I felt I was in a beautiful garden.

Edited by skeptical - 16 years ago

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skeptical

@skeptical

Inactive

Posted: 16 years ago

7th Aug

Dear Diary, I was up early in the morning. My fingers were itching and the paint bottles were beckoning and the brushes started moving. They called to me to pick them up. So I decided to do just that. I picked up the brushes, unscrewed the lid of the green bottle and dipped the hairy bristles in. I twirled the brush to make a brush point and then rested it on the wall. Then I ran lines that intertwined. I drew tiny leaves and then large leaves, some buds and then some flowers. Since I love pink, I decided to paint them pink and tint them with white. Can you guess which flowers I drew? Well I think they were balsams. No …… they were carnations…..no they were …….? I drew them all over the wall. What a big canvas I had! And I let my imagination take hold of my hands and my hands? They seemed to have a mind of their own. They smoothly glided and made decorative designs.

Billo's mum came to collect the morning papers and was the first to see my masterpiece. With her mouth agape, she stared at what I had drawn and her eyes almost popped out. She went rushing to call the other ladies and soon I had an audience. I could hear the murmurs and the whispers but I couldn't care less. I was thoroughly enjoying myself. It's like playing the piano. With fingers running over the keys, a beautiful melody is born. With fingers running with deft strokes, a picture is born. Aren't they similar? Both having a beauty that touches the heart. Papa came out of the house and couldn't believe what he saw. But the ladies apologised and promised that they wouldn't call me "mad" anymore. Oh!!!!! Does that mean I can't call them mad either? The postman was at the door and said that today is 7th August. Dear God………..how did I forget? It was Anuradha Rai's birthday and said so. Why did the adults suddenly fall silent? But that date triggered an avalanche of emotions in me. Who was Anuradha Rai? I began to pace up and down and repeatedly asked myself. Papa came behind me. He asked me what I was seeking. I am trying to put a face to the name, Papa. Anuradha Rai was …..who was she? I knew her from somewhere but from where. Papa told me it was time to get ready. But I was not ready. Not ready to do anything. I wanted to know who…….Oh dear me…….Wasn't Anuradha Rai……. Mamma? This upset me and I threw a huge tantrum. I was screaming and pushing everything away. Papa went to work. The kind lady tried to passify me. She kept asking me what I wanted and what was troubling me. I wanted my Mamma. Why couldn't anyone understand?

I couldn't speak, I couldn't tell
I was sure going through hell
I banged my head and didn't bother
For all I wanted was my mother.

Come and see the garden I've made
Where flowers are of all shades
Where white fluffy rabbits played
And brown baby donkeys brayed.

I was so sad. I began to beat my head on the floor, then on the cupboard. That lady got frantic and started to call Papa to come back for she couldn't handle me. She called Vikram Uncle too. Meanwhile my head started hurting since I was rattling the steel cupboard. There was a blowplast suitcase on the cupboard which started to move. But I was like a little bull and there was no stopping me. The suitcase began to fall………

Edited by skeptical - 16 years ago

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Parma

@Parasaathi

Beginner

Posted: 16 years ago

Superb Skept. I was looking for a remark on that paste on Vidya's face. You went suttle. 😉

I was thinking. Antara notice it and said to herself who is this crazy looking woman next to me😆. I think I will continue to look at the sky hoping and praying she would disappear😆 Let me not look at her or else she will turn me into that😆