'NO' is an Option ---Discuss - Page 2

Originally posted by: Onyourface

-Is it practical to explain your dilemma and ask for more time?

-Is it accepted for a girl to say, she is not ready for this rishta yet & doesn't feel a connection with him?

Hola nandu🤗 bang on ! **is it an obligation to say yes if we don't have a reason to say no ?** well ..the lines are quite blurry here ....

interesting topic and discussions going on here ...chalo let me also give my 2 cents 😆

First I start with mishti's thing here , I find the whole kunal's rishta for mishti thing extremely stupid and out of logic to begin with 🤣

1. Forget marriage , I wouldn't even say yes to a guy whose family just rejected my sister and instead chose me ...are we sisters some commodities or local trains haan ke ek pasand nahi aayi toh aap dusri le lo 😆 This very insulting gesture by meenu was enough for mishti to say no ..she should have said no .. for herself and for kuhu ....simple as that !

2. Coming to BM thinking mishti should get married to a guy who can be a bodyguard to her and save her from naman 🤣🤣 she thought its kunal who saved mish and got desperate ...first of all BM ji , you don't even share naman's truth with rajvanshs and then expect mishti's would be husband to save her 24*7 ....#RipLogics 🤣 Also if you want to save your daughter...please teach her some self defense or rather arrange a security for her , file a police complaint against naman and sort it out yourself...why to expect your daughter to get married for all the mess to be cleaned

Yes mishti wasn't sure about kunal but since she didn't have anything concrete against him , she went for a yes...

..also I feel mishti didn't really give any concrete thought too , it was after chasma incident she started noticing the red flags and by the GD time , she made her decision....too late par theek hai ladki ne sahi decision toh le liya for herself and for kunal ...and if I correctly remember kunal was also ready to break off the rishta...the bottom line here being both of them were not ready for a relationship and it was very clear they were not interested in each other at all and were just doing all this because of family and societal pressures 😆 Varna phone toh hai na unke pass ..jaanna hota toh phone pe batein karte. agar date spoil hui toh 😆 Instead ....one was spending time and taking advices from abir and other one appearing to be more relaxed with kuhu 😆 the urge to know each other and spend time with each other comes from within and mish- nal clearly had no urge to know each other 😆 Thodi bohot koshish kar lete the out of formality 😆

So coming to your main question here , no , there is nothing wrong in explaining your dilemma and buying some more time , however since families also get involved here and it's not a simple girl boy meet and date stuff 😆 so one has to also specify the amount of time and you just can't keep the other one hanging and waiting for a long time too !

And yes if the girl comes up with a feeling that she dosent feel the connection and it's not gonna work for whatever reasons then her opinions has to be heard n accepted... the acceptance comes easy for some 😳 And extremely difficult for some

Rishta talks are always sensitive and come with a *handle with care * caution 😃

And if I personally mention 😆 Rishta talks are going on in my house...I know bohot papad belne padte hai to convince my parents that your definitely of a *good * guy is not fitting in my dictionary and hence it's a no from my side 😆 Although I feel if its just left to me , I wouldn't be 100% sure anyday 😆😆 but overall I am quite lucky to have understanding family for the most part so no issues 😆

Good to read such analysis post after a long time. Thank you Uru for point out all the facts 👍..

Originally posted by: yrhpk_aus

Just opening up an interesting thread of thoughts and discussion :)

"KYUN JHAT-PHAT SHAADI?"

The inspiring motto of our show - 'Why marry in a jiffy?' through which our head-strong, smart and brave FL Mishti puts forth a request for marital courtship for a chance to get to know and understand her prospective life-partner.

And through her journey, we are made to remember that 'NO' is an option'! For the right reasons, Mishti herself calls her rishta with Kunal off on the goddhana day. Ofcourse she took the time to contemplate how she felt about him, what affects it will have on the family and ultimately the consequences for both Kunal and herself IF they went ahead with the rishta.

HOWEVER; my question/concern is this ---

Feel free to WATCH this scene again (as reference) :

https://www.instagram.com/p/CHZp-WehwtQ/?utm_source=ig_web_copy_link

By the END of the track, we learn the importance of respecting and utilising the 'OPTION' of 'NO'.

BUT, even in this scene above; Mishti says "Nah kehne ki koi vaje nahi hai". The fact that when Mishti is once again feeling the pressure of saying an answer to Meenakshi (with limited marital courtship), she feels that if she doesn't have a valid reason to say 'no'. Then she will be obligated to say 'yes' even though she is still uncertain about the whole rishta.

In the end, Mishti does voice her opinion that she is breaking off the rishta, because she doesn't think they are compatible. However even in the scene above, she still feels unconvinced by the vibe she has with Kunal, yet she feels compelled to say 'yes' to Meenakshi because she doesn't have a proper reason.

Kyu? Is it necessary for her to spell out a proper reason to say 'no', why isn't her apprehension enough to say she isn't ready? Why can't she ask for more time?

So my question/concern to you all forum waasis -

"Why did Mishti feel the need/pressure to say 'yes' to godhhana even when she was still unsure?"

How would you handle her situation?

-Is it practical to explain your dilemma and ask for more time?

-Is it accepted for a girl to say, she is not ready for this rishta yet & doesn't feel a connection with him?

Please share your thoughts, I would love to hear what you all think and what you all would do:

😊😊

xxx

Originally posted by: vidz70

As usual super se upar analysis by Uru.. Everything bang on.. 👌👍👏👏

Good to read such analysis post after a long time. Thank you Uru for point out all the facts 👍..

😃 And as usual....🤗🤗 Thank you vidya di for always giving time to my posts and leaving a beautiful comment for me ❤️❤️😳

Great topic Nandu and loved all the discussion in this thread 👍🏼

Sharing my two cents:

"Why did Mishti feel the need/pressure to say 'yes' to godhhana even when she was still unsure?"

I think Mishti said no because she was feeling direct pressure from BM and indirect pressure/nudge from abir and other family members. Since we are always taught that elders know better and mishti knows BM always wishes for the best for Mishti, Mishti felt obligated to say "yes". She wasn't even ready to get married when the rishta was swapped but she agreed to give it a chance because of her family and now she's saying "yes" again for her family.

How would you handle her situation?

-Is it practical to explain your dilemma and ask for more time?

I think that depends on context like which part of the world someone lives in and their family's thought process. If the family is open minded, then the person can and should definitely ask for more time if they don't feel ready. In my case, when I told my parents that I am not ready to get married yet, luckily they easily agreed. But I understand, that might not be possible or practical in everyone's case.

-Is it accepted for a girl to say, she is not ready for this rishta yet & doesn't feel a connection with him?

Yes, I think it's completely acceptable for a girl to say no if she doesn't feel a connection yet BUT after she has given it a chance ie try to get to know the guy somehow. Same goes for the guy. Both can say "no" but should do it mindfully without hurting the other's feelings.

I have seen some marriages in my family where the guy and girl were seemingly good match such as education, family background etc but things didn't go well after marriage because they didn't have a connection. So I think it's very important to have that connection with significant other to live a happy life.