G! Honestly , I think your posts get so much more poignant when it gets to such emotional episodes when we truly see the parental desperation because, again- I loved it. And the collage, the colouring just makes the ISHRU & Raman ones so much more impactful. Wonderful job.
It was such a heartbreaking episode, literally. It's episodes like this that truly tell of my investment into these characters and their lives... and the ability of the three integral actors is the thing that makes the difference. The scenes that stayed with me, is the same ones that stayed with everyone. And for me, it was very reflective of two scenes from the past tracks. Firstly, the shot of Raman standing in the background as the two most important women in his life clutched and comforted each other- one in her innocence and the other trying to abate her own fears...beautiful.. That shot, that moment, that emotion- exceptional.
I remembered the incident after Raman made Ishu apologize to Adhi early in their marriage and he stood outside the door as he watched Ru question their marriage and ISHRA's love. So similar to me the shots. Back then he stood outside the room- again because of his own guilt and pain and watched the two of them cocoon themselves in their world , finding the comfort he desperately needed. Here too he needed the same, he stood in the fringes needing the warmth and love and that encompassing love tat he always receives from them- needing it to take away some of the hurt that he was piling on himself. But now, like then, he held himself back from entering- because he didn't feel worthy, because he knew it was 'all his fault', because the fear of the rejection of the love he needs is more then the desire to step forward to try and grasp it. The use of the physical threshold here by the CVs was just pure brilliance.
And the moment of Ru comforting Ishu, not knowing what exactly was the matter... simply that her Ishimaa needed her- what a return to classic YHM dynamics. I recall the scene after Ammah's accident when Raman was sleeping in the hall and Ishu sent Ru to 'take care' of her papa. Standing in the sidelines as their little cupid made him eat and took care of him. The tenderness and overwhelming parental love in that scene is quite similar to this one for me. In both instances Ru and her innocent words and ministrations were the balm for ISHRA's pain.
It was also quite interesting to me that Raman's guilt and sadness were about breaking up Ru and 'her Ishimaa'- not Ishita. For him too, it seems, on some level, she is Ru's first, Ishimaa first- especially in moments where Ru's custody comes into play. Despite the sting of her carelessly flung words of yesterday, he too recognizes the sliver of truth in her words- she was Ru's first, and then his. As much as Ru is her lifeline , Ishita is Ru's... and Raman's words today simply confirmed that.
But recognizing that doesn't negate his own need for comfort ... and that beautiful moment of him falling back into the depths of self hatred was just too painful to watch. To feel so alone, surrounded by so many, to not be able to reach out to the ones you know are in the same position and can make it better...it's a devastating thing to hate your self, and in some corner of my RKB's bruised heart that's what he was doing... I couldn't stand it.😭😭
As for Ishu's decision to abscond with Ru in tow...I completely agree with the desperate mother notion that a lot of you have put forth. But for whatever reason I looked at it with a different twist as well. This, for me, is as much about the overwhelming power of Ishita's love, as a woman, as it is a mother.
Ishita is generally a collected woman who tends to look at things rationally with sympathy (sometimes too much so).. but the two recent moments when she acted completely OTT and out of character were during the ISHRA Tom and Jerry chase in the airport and now. A part of the message to me seems to be that when the security of the home, people and life she loves gets threatened she loses rational thought and reacts in a very irrational manner. Add to that the memories and pain that hearing all the GKC chants and her fertility being up on inspection again must have brought forth- and it's a disaster in the making.
Recall that when she got the divorce papers she simply picked up her keys and ran, and now with the 'custody' papers, the same. Ishita, it seems, can't handle extreme emotions, especially when it comes to her love for RAMRU and when that love gets threatened- she simply reacts. Just like she never thought about the spectacle she was making chasing Raman around the airport, she never thought about the consequences of what she was doing to Ru when she took her away. But the last few minutes of their interaction leave me in no doubt that it will click. She will understand and do the right thing, even if she is caught before she does.
My heart is breaking and I know next week will be even tougher but hopefully by this time next week, ISHRA will have began to fill the grand canyon size emotional gap that exits between them at the moment. Because the only way for Shagun to be defeated is by ISHRA as a unit, we all know this. And when the finally stop fighting themselves and start fighting her- it will be glorious.
All these moments with them once again pointed to the angle of the #ISHRA 2.0 track for me. They still will need to break themselves and each other a little more, and then once they reach that inevitable point they will start redefining themselves, as a couple and as a family. And TBH they need it. It is unfair to pin so much on a 7 year old, they need to know that they have an identity outside of her, that they can fight and make up and exist outside of her. And both these broken souls need the assurance that who they are, outside of who they are for Ru, is not only good enough but desired and loved and appreciated by the one they love. This courting, this coming together will be amazing .. and possibly lead to the #ISHRA re-wedding we have all been craving. Keep that thought alive ladies, hold on to it because it will certainly get a whole lot worse for us all before it gets better. But it will be worth it. Because they are worth it.
Fan Fictions
Anupamaa
