Part 4C
Day Three PM: Baatein Kuch Ankahee Si
It was long after midnight when Ishita and Raman finally called it a night.
They had talked for hours. At first Raman, had been hesitant, his voice cracking as he tried to verbalise the tale of betrayal and perfidy that was never far from his mind, but that he had not brought to his lips for years.
He held nothing back. It was as though the dam walls had been breached, and the gush of reminiscences was unstoppable. Ishita was a good listener and she had let him talk, holding his hands firmly in hers, wiping away the tears that flooded his hooded eyes,encouraging him when he faltered.
Her heart ached for him as his story unfolded. She had been unlucky in love too, but luckily she had discovered her fianc's shortcomings before she married him. Raman, on the other hand, had been forced to confront his wife's infidelity after he had thought his family was complete, his life was forever settled. And the loss of his son. Raman wept on her shoulder as he described how Adi had been taken from him, how he had been proven an abuser in court, how a non contact order had been made against him. "Six years Ishita" he said through his tears. "I held him when he was a few minutes old, he slept in my arms every day, he made me a father, made me realise how much love I had in me, and I haven't seen him for 6 years"
She wept with him as he told her about flying out to his sons boarding school in Ooty, of waiting at the gates just to get a glimpse of him, not knowing what he looked like now, but knowing a fathers heart would recognise his son.
And he told her about how he saw Shagun in Ruhi, how he was too scared to love his daughter in case she too was taken from him. " I can't go through this again" he had muttered."I just can't".
Ishita's heart filled with pity and something else, something as yet undefined. His daughter was exactly like him, every gesture, every mechanism of his reminded her of Ruhi - she knew this was something that she could help him recognise, in due course.
He had seemed withdrawn after he finished telling his story. She knew he was emotionally drained and exhausted, but she had refused to leave him alone. She had insisted that he have some dinner, had protested that her cooking was not so bad that he go on a hunger strike. He had smiled at that, and again her heart had leapt.
He had helped her to heat up the food and they had eaten together. Even in his distressed state, he had not forgotten to praise her efforts, even though the pasta had become soggy and cluggy and the sauce lumpy.
"Jhoote" she had told him, {Liar}, and he had smiled and patted her shoulder, saying "Tu dentist hi rehna beta" {you should stick to being a dentist}
After dinner and over coffee, Ishita had told him her story. This was after he had told her he no longer believed in love.
"You said I still love Shagun, Ishita. You're wrong, I don't love her. I don't even hate her anymore. But I did love her once, and I hate the man I used to be, the man who got taken in by her, the man she was able to destroy. Shagun killed the love inside me Ishita. I've stopped believing in fairy tales. I've stopped believing in love. There is no such thing Ishita. People use other people, and they call it love to justify themselves. Well, I don't."
"But I still do Raman" she had replied. "And after what happened to me, I could stop believing too, na?"
She had told him all about Subbu, their meeting at 16, their comfortable and happy courtship and then finally their engagement just over two years ago, when she had collapsed and they had found out about her blocked Fallopian tubes, the result of a childhood illness. Her eyes had filled with tears as she recalled how Subbu had told her that no marriage could survive without children, the taunts of his mother, and then the unrelenting search of her mother for a groom for her, and all the rejections she faced because she refused to lie.
He saw the pain in her eyes and, silently cursing Subbu and his mother, he drew her to him, returning to her the comfort she had given him.
"Subbu was a fool" he hold her, holding her close. "How could anyone give you up?"
She stirred in his arms, suddenly self conscious as she felt his heart beating alongside hers. There was something so comforting in his embrace, that she wanted to stay in his arms forever, but there was also something disturbing, an awareness that she had never felt before, a desire to be held tighter. His stubble grazed her forehead and the sensations that were evoked in her were completely alien to her. She pulled away a little from him and he too seemed to recollect himself, letting her go as he stood up.
"It's been a long day Ishita" he said. "You should get to bed"
"Yes" she said, suddenly shy, as she too stood up.
She turned to go, then ran back and kissed him softly on one cheek.
"Goodnight Raman" she whispered.
He stood watching her go, his fingers on his cheek, savouring the feel of her lips, uncertainty in his eyes.
"Goodnight Ishita" he replied.
**********************************************************************************************************
Baatein kuch ankahee si
Kuch ansuni si
Hone lagi
Kabu dil pe raha na
Hasti hamari khone lagi
Shayad yehi hai pyaar
Keh de mujhse
Dil mein kya hai
Aaisa bhi kya guroor
Tujhko bhi toh ho raha hai
Thoda asar zaroor
Yeh khamooshi jeene na de
Koi toh baat hai
Shayad yehi hai pyar
Tu hi meri roshini hai
Tu hi Chiraag hai
Dheere dheere mit jayega
Halka sa daag hai
Yeh zeher bhi yun piya hai
Jaise sharaab ho
Shayad yehi hai pyar
Part 5A: Day Four AM Fools Rush In
https://www.indiaforums.com/forum/ye-hai-mohabbatein/4323376/ff-desire-i-prologue-part-14?pn=43 Edited by Veeann - 10 years ago
Anupamaa
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