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Hi All
I have based this one on Raman's thoughts (mostly regret) and his time away from Ishita after the Parmeet fiasco. I havent spent a lot of time in jotting down about Param's future. Frankly no punishment seemed enough, and it wasnt the focus of this scene. So i just 'skipped' over what would happen to him
Please let me know what your feedback is...
******
"I fell in love with her when we were together, then fell deeper in love with her in the years we were apart."
Nicholas Sparks, Dear John
It was a lonely night for Raman. Another one when he couldnt see any light at the end of the tunnel. It had been a month since the truth about Paramjeet came out. That night was etched in his memory, something even his sub-conscious mind couldnt forget. He had stood there, like a statue when Ishita's pleading eyes bore into him. She was begging everyone in his family to believe her. Her look towards him turned icier by the minute. He could see the changing expressions in her eyes. First pleading, then disbelief that he wouldnt even look at her, let alone support her. Then the lost hope. The final look scared him. It was a look of hatred. Mixed with a look of disappointment. That was exactly how he looked at himself in the mirror every single day.
When he had got back from Mumbai that night, there was already a heated discussion. Ishita telling everyone that Paramjeet had tried to misbehave with her. And it was not the first time it happened. Paramjeet saying that Ishita was mistaken, he tried to hug her thinking it was Simmi. He showed everyone the giftbox he was carrying too. "main bhala Ishita ji ke liye koi gift kyon khareedonga? she just misunderstood. Lets all go to sleep now, maamla itna bhi serious nahin hai". "How dare you?"
Ishita screamed. That was the first time Raman had ever heard her lose her composure. He should have known then, that there was something to it. "Warna Jhaansi ki Rani kabhi chillati nahin hai, us din to aise lag raha tha ki woh sach mein dari hui bhi thi."
[Otherwise Jhansi ki Rani would never shout, but that day it also looked that she was really scared]
Raman was already emotionally drained after the Mumbai trip. True, it was a successful trip professionally, but on a personal level it was a roller-coaster for him.
Adi had fallen sick, and he witnessed both Shagun and Ashok's callous nature towards Adi's well-being. Shagun did not waste the opportunity to try and get closer to him. On the other hand, he was only thinking about the way Ishita had looked in that green dress. How she had playfully poked him with that needle. Neither of them knew that the needle was the smallest of their problems. The cupid's arrow had already started piercing through their hearts. He'd even bought a box of chocolates for her from the airport. Not that he would admit it. Ruhi would surely love the doll he'd bought her, and then would promptly ask "Papa aap Ishima ke liye koi gift nahin laaye?" He had to be prepared. what else could he get but chocolates. Anything more and Ishita would start making sarcastic remarks about the Raavan changing. All those thoughts were long lost now. The final straw was when Toshiji asked Ishita to SHUT UP and stop wreaking havoc in her family. "OK" Ishita had said with her calm but determined voice now. "I am leaving. Frankly, I do not care if you dont believe me. But, there is NO way I am leaving my daughter here. Not in a house where a woman is not safe. One of these days, you'll realise that I am right, but I dont want to wait for your slow realisation. I am not prepared to take that risk. You can get any lawyer in town, and I will fight for her till my last breath". Raman had snapped out of his haze by then.
She was already out of the door. A sleeping Ruhi in her arms. Everyone was looking at him, expecting him to say something, he couldnt. He couldnt feel, react. He just stood there, wondering where it had all gone wrong. Thats when they all heard the silent Sarika sigh. "Was she witness to all the drama?" Toshiji thought. "Arre, kal tak baat poore society mein pata chal jaayegi".
[The whole society would come of know of this by tomorrow]
Mr Bhalla queitly told Sarika to come back later, and that Ishita would be at the Iyers'. Sarika didnt move, she stayed there, a bit unsure of herself. She said, after what seemed to be the longest 10 seconds "If I had the courage to speak up a couple of months ago, all this wouldnt have happened". "Simmi, you remember my story? The guy who misbehaved with me, got me fired from my job and then mentally tortured me. It was your husband. He even paid me the 2 lakhs to keep my mouth shut. I took that money only because I needed to take care of my ill mother, but now I wish I hadnt. At least Ishitaji wouldnt have to go through this"
The only thing everyone remembered after that was Param running. He shot out the door without looking back. He knew the Bhallas well enough to know that one of them would kill him right then. He wasnt even sure which Bhalla it would be. He just ran for his life. Romi went chasing after him.
Everyone now looked at Raman. He was mad at his family for doing this to Ishita, he was madder at himself for not being there when she needed him the most. He couldnt shout at them. They had always been blind emotional fools. But he always thought of himself as someone with sound judgement, someone who was fair and right. He was the biggest fool. He knowingly isolated the one person who had stood by him , supported him and cared for him. Not just for Ruhi, but for him too.
He had given her the night. He wanted her to try and have a good night's sleep. And did not want to disturb Ruhi's night. Maybe he should have gone to her then. Not given her the night to think. Maybe if he had gone and apologised minutes after all that had happened, she would be back here. Where she belonged. With him. He had gone to the Iyers first thing in the morning. Having been up all night, he was thankful that the Iyers woke up so early. He was there at their door when Amma came out with the agarbatti. He had Ruhi's doll in his hands. Amma was clearly mad, but he was lucky she was chanting her shloks. she would never interrupt her prayer for anything. He silently walked in and towards Ishitas room. He did not knock, afraid of what the answer would be. There she was. Sitting up on her bed, Ruhi on her lap. He did not need anyone to tell him that she was crying, and that she hadn't slept a wink.
"Ishita" Thats all he had to say. SHe looked at him, and said "I know Sarika told you yesterday. SHe came her after she left your house. I know Param ran away. But nothing has changed for me. I am still heart-broken because of the way MY so-called family treated me, the way you treated me. I dont want you to apologise, I know by now that there is only a certain amount of emotion I can expect from you. So please leave. I dont want to come back. Ruhi will stay here with me. She can visit your family as much as she likes. Your family is welcome to come here and meet her whenever they want. I am not one to stand between loved ones. BUT she will live with me. I dont want these frequent lapses of judgement on your part to affect her any more."
Raman was nursing that single drink in hands for over an hour now. The ice had melted and surely would have watered down the alcohol. He didnt have the guts to take a sip. He had promised her, he wouldnt do it any more. This had become his new routine for the last 30 days. He would come home from work, call Ruhi. She would come over for an hour. They would talk about school, his day and sometimes how Ishita's day went. Ruhi, bless her heart, was strangely his emotional support. She somehow sensed something was wrong. She never asked him about why she wasnt living with him any more. MAybe, she hadnt noticed any difference. For her, it was a join BHalla Iyer family, she had just shifted to a different room in the same house. Once Ruhi went back to the Iyers' home, he would have his dinner. He would try and remain strong
for his mom and Simmi. She needed his strength right now. Her divorce proceedings were obviously taking a toll on her. After dinner, he would make his drink, and go to the lonely room.
When Shagun had left him, he was angry. He felt betrayed. Slowly, but steadily that changed into hatred. His only goal in life was his business. His need to crush Ashok and Shagun.
It was different this time. He was angry at himself, he was the one who had betrayed the trust. He had no idea how much time it would take to get him out of this feeling. He knew he had to bring her back. He had to woo her. He had to take down the protective cover he had over his heart. Unless she saw his bare soul, she wouldnt come back to him. Thats it, he thought. It wasnt about him winning her back. It was about her coming back to him on her own. And she wouldnt do that unless he showed her how much she meant to him. with that thought in mind and determination in his eyes, he poured his 30th drink into the sink and knocked on the Iyers' door.
He didnt expect her to answer the door. As soon as he saw her face, he lost his footing. He hadnt really thought about what he would say and how he would say anything to her. She just opened the door and let him in. "Ruhi is sleeping in the bedroom, so we'll have to talk here" she said. She knew why he was here, that was a start.
But he still didnt know what to say.
"Ishita"
"Yes Raman"
"I, I " This was getting increasingly difficult.
"The next time, why dont you just text me. I have to go to sleep now, have an early appointment tomorrow" She wasnt going to let him off easy.
"Will you just sit down and listen to me, please. Just this once, dont talk. Just listen"
"I am sorry for everything that happened with you. Sorry that you had face such a horrible situation at my home. Sorry that everyone in my family treated you with disrepect"
"Its OK Raman. Mummyji, papaji and Simmi have already spoken to me. We are good now. They were cheated as well. I dont have a grudge to hold against them"
"maine bola na, please let me speak. I am not finished. I have just begun"
"What I have done to you, I dont deserve forgiveness. I have said sorry, and maybe you'll even forgive me in time. But thats not what I am here for."
She lifted an eyebrow. Raavan Kumar couldnt even apologise humbly. But she'd been ordered twice to shut up, so she held her tongue.
"I want you back in my life. I want you to be there in the room when I go to sleep. I want to be able to see you when I open my eyes every morning. I want to sleep with the feeling that you are around me. I want to feel that temporary sadness when I bid you goodbye in the mornings. I want to see your smile when we meet again in the evenings. I want to share that sense of pride when we are at Ruhi's school, witnessing her achievements. I want to see look of sweet anticipation on your face when
I hand you gifts. I want your heart to flutter every time I call. I want mine to skip a beat every time you answer that call"
That was all Ishita could bear any way. She flung herself into his arms. And for the first time in ages, she felt liked she belonged somewhere. A place where she could lose herself into another being. A place where she could breathe freely...
I have based this one on Raman's thoughts (mostly regret) and his time away from Ishita after the Parmeet fiasco. I havent spent a lot of time in jotting down about Param's future. Frankly no punishment seemed enough, and it wasnt the focus of this scene. So i just 'skipped' over what would happen to him
Please let me know what your feedback is...
******
"I fell in love with her when we were together, then fell deeper in love with her in the years we were apart."
Nicholas Sparks, Dear John
It was a lonely night for Raman. Another one when he couldnt see any light at the end of the tunnel. It had been a month since the truth about Paramjeet came out. That night was etched in his memory, something even his sub-conscious mind couldnt forget. He had stood there, like a statue when Ishita's pleading eyes bore into him. She was begging everyone in his family to believe her. Her look towards him turned icier by the minute. He could see the changing expressions in her eyes. First pleading, then disbelief that he wouldnt even look at her, let alone support her. Then the lost hope. The final look scared him. It was a look of hatred. Mixed with a look of disappointment. That was exactly how he looked at himself in the mirror every single day.
When he had got back from Mumbai that night, there was already a heated discussion. Ishita telling everyone that Paramjeet had tried to misbehave with her. And it was not the first time it happened. Paramjeet saying that Ishita was mistaken, he tried to hug her thinking it was Simmi. He showed everyone the giftbox he was carrying too. "main bhala Ishita ji ke liye koi gift kyon khareedonga? she just misunderstood. Lets all go to sleep now, maamla itna bhi serious nahin hai". "How dare you?"
Ishita screamed. That was the first time Raman had ever heard her lose her composure. He should have known then, that there was something to it. "Warna Jhaansi ki Rani kabhi chillati nahin hai, us din to aise lag raha tha ki woh sach mein dari hui bhi thi."
[Otherwise Jhansi ki Rani would never shout, but that day it also looked that she was really scared]
Raman was already emotionally drained after the Mumbai trip. True, it was a successful trip professionally, but on a personal level it was a roller-coaster for him.
Adi had fallen sick, and he witnessed both Shagun and Ashok's callous nature towards Adi's well-being. Shagun did not waste the opportunity to try and get closer to him. On the other hand, he was only thinking about the way Ishita had looked in that green dress. How she had playfully poked him with that needle. Neither of them knew that the needle was the smallest of their problems. The cupid's arrow had already started piercing through their hearts. He'd even bought a box of chocolates for her from the airport. Not that he would admit it. Ruhi would surely love the doll he'd bought her, and then would promptly ask "Papa aap Ishima ke liye koi gift nahin laaye?" He had to be prepared. what else could he get but chocolates. Anything more and Ishita would start making sarcastic remarks about the Raavan changing. All those thoughts were long lost now. The final straw was when Toshiji asked Ishita to SHUT UP and stop wreaking havoc in her family. "OK" Ishita had said with her calm but determined voice now. "I am leaving. Frankly, I do not care if you dont believe me. But, there is NO way I am leaving my daughter here. Not in a house where a woman is not safe. One of these days, you'll realise that I am right, but I dont want to wait for your slow realisation. I am not prepared to take that risk. You can get any lawyer in town, and I will fight for her till my last breath". Raman had snapped out of his haze by then.
She was already out of the door. A sleeping Ruhi in her arms. Everyone was looking at him, expecting him to say something, he couldnt. He couldnt feel, react. He just stood there, wondering where it had all gone wrong. Thats when they all heard the silent Sarika sigh. "Was she witness to all the drama?" Toshiji thought. "Arre, kal tak baat poore society mein pata chal jaayegi".
[The whole society would come of know of this by tomorrow]
Mr Bhalla queitly told Sarika to come back later, and that Ishita would be at the Iyers'. Sarika didnt move, she stayed there, a bit unsure of herself. She said, after what seemed to be the longest 10 seconds "If I had the courage to speak up a couple of months ago, all this wouldnt have happened". "Simmi, you remember my story? The guy who misbehaved with me, got me fired from my job and then mentally tortured me. It was your husband. He even paid me the 2 lakhs to keep my mouth shut. I took that money only because I needed to take care of my ill mother, but now I wish I hadnt. At least Ishitaji wouldnt have to go through this"
The only thing everyone remembered after that was Param running. He shot out the door without looking back. He knew the Bhallas well enough to know that one of them would kill him right then. He wasnt even sure which Bhalla it would be. He just ran for his life. Romi went chasing after him.
Everyone now looked at Raman. He was mad at his family for doing this to Ishita, he was madder at himself for not being there when she needed him the most. He couldnt shout at them. They had always been blind emotional fools. But he always thought of himself as someone with sound judgement, someone who was fair and right. He was the biggest fool. He knowingly isolated the one person who had stood by him , supported him and cared for him. Not just for Ruhi, but for him too.
He had given her the night. He wanted her to try and have a good night's sleep. And did not want to disturb Ruhi's night. Maybe he should have gone to her then. Not given her the night to think. Maybe if he had gone and apologised minutes after all that had happened, she would be back here. Where she belonged. With him. He had gone to the Iyers first thing in the morning. Having been up all night, he was thankful that the Iyers woke up so early. He was there at their door when Amma came out with the agarbatti. He had Ruhi's doll in his hands. Amma was clearly mad, but he was lucky she was chanting her shloks. she would never interrupt her prayer for anything. He silently walked in and towards Ishitas room. He did not knock, afraid of what the answer would be. There she was. Sitting up on her bed, Ruhi on her lap. He did not need anyone to tell him that she was crying, and that she hadn't slept a wink.
"Ishita" Thats all he had to say. SHe looked at him, and said "I know Sarika told you yesterday. SHe came her after she left your house. I know Param ran away. But nothing has changed for me. I am still heart-broken because of the way MY so-called family treated me, the way you treated me. I dont want you to apologise, I know by now that there is only a certain amount of emotion I can expect from you. So please leave. I dont want to come back. Ruhi will stay here with me. She can visit your family as much as she likes. Your family is welcome to come here and meet her whenever they want. I am not one to stand between loved ones. BUT she will live with me. I dont want these frequent lapses of judgement on your part to affect her any more."
Raman was nursing that single drink in hands for over an hour now. The ice had melted and surely would have watered down the alcohol. He didnt have the guts to take a sip. He had promised her, he wouldnt do it any more. This had become his new routine for the last 30 days. He would come home from work, call Ruhi. She would come over for an hour. They would talk about school, his day and sometimes how Ishita's day went. Ruhi, bless her heart, was strangely his emotional support. She somehow sensed something was wrong. She never asked him about why she wasnt living with him any more. MAybe, she hadnt noticed any difference. For her, it was a join BHalla Iyer family, she had just shifted to a different room in the same house. Once Ruhi went back to the Iyers' home, he would have his dinner. He would try and remain strong
for his mom and Simmi. She needed his strength right now. Her divorce proceedings were obviously taking a toll on her. After dinner, he would make his drink, and go to the lonely room.
When Shagun had left him, he was angry. He felt betrayed. Slowly, but steadily that changed into hatred. His only goal in life was his business. His need to crush Ashok and Shagun.
It was different this time. He was angry at himself, he was the one who had betrayed the trust. He had no idea how much time it would take to get him out of this feeling. He knew he had to bring her back. He had to woo her. He had to take down the protective cover he had over his heart. Unless she saw his bare soul, she wouldnt come back to him. Thats it, he thought. It wasnt about him winning her back. It was about her coming back to him on her own. And she wouldnt do that unless he showed her how much she meant to him. with that thought in mind and determination in his eyes, he poured his 30th drink into the sink and knocked on the Iyers' door.
He didnt expect her to answer the door. As soon as he saw her face, he lost his footing. He hadnt really thought about what he would say and how he would say anything to her. She just opened the door and let him in. "Ruhi is sleeping in the bedroom, so we'll have to talk here" she said. She knew why he was here, that was a start.
But he still didnt know what to say.
"Ishita"
"Yes Raman"
"I, I " This was getting increasingly difficult.
"The next time, why dont you just text me. I have to go to sleep now, have an early appointment tomorrow" She wasnt going to let him off easy.
"Will you just sit down and listen to me, please. Just this once, dont talk. Just listen"
"I am sorry for everything that happened with you. Sorry that you had face such a horrible situation at my home. Sorry that everyone in my family treated you with disrepect"
"Its OK Raman. Mummyji, papaji and Simmi have already spoken to me. We are good now. They were cheated as well. I dont have a grudge to hold against them"
"maine bola na, please let me speak. I am not finished. I have just begun"
"What I have done to you, I dont deserve forgiveness. I have said sorry, and maybe you'll even forgive me in time. But thats not what I am here for."
She lifted an eyebrow. Raavan Kumar couldnt even apologise humbly. But she'd been ordered twice to shut up, so she held her tongue.
"I want you back in my life. I want you to be there in the room when I go to sleep. I want to be able to see you when I open my eyes every morning. I want to sleep with the feeling that you are around me. I want to feel that temporary sadness when I bid you goodbye in the mornings. I want to see your smile when we meet again in the evenings. I want to share that sense of pride when we are at Ruhi's school, witnessing her achievements. I want to see look of sweet anticipation on your face when
I hand you gifts. I want your heart to flutter every time I call. I want mine to skip a beat every time you answer that call"
"So, what do you say, will you give me another chance? at Life? and Love?" He kneeled
That was all Ishita could bear any way. She flung herself into his arms. And for the first time in ages, she felt liked she belonged somewhere. A place where she could lose herself into another being. A place where she could breathe freely...
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