Women being ambitious... Is it a crime? - Page 4

dazling had ur cousin said he wants to marry an indian women for cultural background or some thing it would be ok but this is something too much like i dont like those guys thinking this way indian women are not dumb and it not as if its the west only which can teach them to be smart and poke their nose in their financial matters we can do it here also being a wife means this only poke ur nose in ur hubby's finanacial matters. 😆

Originally posted by: sareg

In my opinion, A educated woman has a capability to work, if she doesnt, for whatever her reasons, that is "her" problem. I know raising kids is a fulltime job(albiet non-paying) in itself too.

If she wants to work and if her husband/father/in-laws dont allow it, that is her problem what good is her education if she cannot even convince her family members to let her work, she is not going to be any good for the work industry, where you have to sell yourself to get employment.

Tough pill for the feminists to swallow, I know I am going to get hit left and right for this, but that is the absolute truth at the end of the day

Agreed.

Before one can sell anything to anyone else, they have to be sold themselves on what ever they are trying to sell.  Be it in profession or personal. 😊

[quote=Dazzlingflower]Interesting point Marayam. We have come so far and still we see women struggling to get equal opportunities. There is this pressure from the parents, choose a profession where you can be done early and have time to get married. When it comes to women, everything revoloves around marriage. More and more I am noticing that men don't appreciate smart women. They like those girls who always introduce themselves with their first name only...like they don't have any last names. Many expect them to continue with their gender biased roles. I find it so hard to believe that many men who consider them to be liberal are actually backward minded- it's okay for women to work outside the house, but they still have to take care of the house. My own cousin brother who is born and raised here wants a wife from India...which is not a crime, but why he wants a wife from india makes me sick. He said," atleast for first few years, she will obey me and won't poke her nose in my personal and finacial matters." I was so mad. Is he bringing a wife or a slave. THis other guy that I know wants a women who only have limited education because the educated woman will know too much.

It's the attitude of the society towards women. Once you have kids, you should leave your job and take care of your children. If you decide to have kids, 99%, you will be the one taking care of them. Yes in a sense Marayam you are right. It is a crime to be daughter, a mother, and a wife. That's why we pay the price by not pursuing what our heart desires.

[/quote]

Awww Welcome back Rajju di🤗 hope to see your history based posts more ofter😉

Originally posted by: sareg

If she wants to work and if her husband/father/in-laws dont allow it, that is her problem what good is her education if she cannot even convince her family members to let her work, she is not going to be any good for the work industry, where you have to sell yourself to get employment.

Tough pill for the feminists to swallow, I know I am going to get hit left and right for this, but that is the absolute truth at the end of the day

 Sareg... Totaly unfair comparrision...Even educated women have to deal with emotional factor at home which is not the case when facing corporate work environment.. I know some women in high posts at work but at home , husbands or in-laws rule..😡 It must be really sad as they cannot reason and expect fair treatment that they do at work.

 I am not feminist but what you are saying is like if one cannot get a job in India , one is not worthy to work in USA or UK.

Originally posted by: sandya_rao7

dazling had ur cousin said he wants to marry an indian women for cultural background or some thing it would be ok but this is something too much like i dont like those guys thinking this way indian women are not dumb and it not as if its the west only which can teach them to be smart and poke their nose in their financial matters we can do it here also being a wife means this only poke ur nose in ur hubby's finanacial matters. 😆

😆 true.

I know what you are saying. It's not about getting married to a girl from india. It's the reasoning that kills me. There is a real estate agent I know. He went to india to find a wife. I was so surprised that he would ask them directly ," can you stay home and cook, only then I can marry you." He also used to add ," I have never made tea for myself, so don't expect me to help in the house in any way." I used to wonder why girls won't kick his royal behind. He did manage to find a girl. The girl told him ," I have 3 brothers and I am used to cooking and cleaning, so doing the same thing at your house will be the same.  

Awww Welcome back Rajju di🤗 hope to see your history based posts more ofter😉[/QUOTE]

Thanks Maraym😛. I actually held myself from posting any history posts. I was going to post something, but I thought people would be like ,"she is back after such a long time and she posts the same old history related topics.

Originally posted by: lighthouse

 Sareg... Totaly unfair comparrision...Even educated women have to deal with emotional factor at home which is not the case when facing corporate work environment.. I know some women in high posts at work but at home , husbands or in-laws rule..😡 It must be really sad as they cannot reason and expect fair treatment that they do at work.

 I am not feminist but what you are saying is like if one cannot get a job in India , one is not worthy to work in USA or UK.

😆😆😆, where did I talk about India, USA or UK?

when you go for a job interview what happens, you tell them you are qualified to do the job, basically you are selling the idea

when you go talk to your spouse or in-laws, you tell them you are qualified to go do the job, basically you are selling the idea

With the people at home, you exactly know what their mindset is, where their weak points are, what their arguments are, and above all they are "your own" people, if you cannot fight those arguments, how are you going to convince a complete stranger you are qualified for the job?

but again, you know what my signature reads dont you😉

The posts here make very interesting reading.

I can relate many instances in our semi government company here where many women are employed and are able to perform normal tasks during normal hours but if there is any extra work pressure or targets to be achieved, then invariably the men are the people to slog it out irrespective of time involved and the women say some excuses!
I don't say this because I am a male but I am telling practically what happens in most cases.

Accepting the higher role of women at home, don't you think women need to lower their ambitions at workplace considering th practicalities

Edited by dasa1 - 17 years ago

Originally posted by: dasa1

The posts here make very interesting reading.

I can relate many instances in our semi government company here where many women are employed and are able to perform normal tasks during normal hours but if there is any extra work pressure or targets to be achieved, then invariably the men are the people to slog it out irrespective of time involved and the women say some excuses!

ya men just have their work to look after but its not the case with women. they have look after their house also.
I don't say this because I am a male i knew it while reading ur post but I am telling practically what happens in most cases.
thats wht it is practically men r not very co-operative whn it come to house hold work and ultimatly women r over burdened.
Accepting the higher role of women at home, don't you think women need to lower their ambitions at workplace considering th practicalities

y sld women bear the grudge? is it not possible for men to accept more role in house? if they r capable and they r willing to do it then y is it that women are only always expected to sacrifice their ambition?

Originally posted by: sareg

😆😆😆, where did I talk about India, USA or UK?

when you go for a job interview what happens, you tell them you are qualified to do the job, basically you are selling the idea

when you go talk to your spouse or in-laws, you tell them you are qualified to go do the job, basically you are selling the idea

With the people at home, you exactly know what their mindset is, where their weak points are, what their arguments are, and above all they are "your own" people, if you cannot fight those arguments, how are you going to convince a complete stranger you are qualified for the job?

but again, you know what my signature reads dont you😉

 Sareg....2 completely different scenarios...Making assumptions that family and corporate world project similar challenges.

 When you are applying for a job,  you are selling to someone who is not against you. Infact he/she is trying to look for the best in you and how the firm can benefit from your knowledge..

 When facing opposition at home from family members or spouse , you are already at the disadvantage and facing hostility and then their is emotional blackmail involved in a domestic situation too.

 One cannot say that if are you are not competent in changing a domestic situation to your advantage , you are not worthy to the corporate world.

 A lot of succesful people and CEO's are terrible with their personal lives because one cannot apply the same rules to both domestic and corporate situations. Imagine a pre requisite for a job offer- Have you succeded in convincing your spouse or family? If not do not bother to apply.😕

 

 

 

Edited by lighthouse - 17 years ago