Sonali Kulkarni's "Lazy Women" jibe: Controversy or Facts? - Page 6

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Posted: 1 years ago

Originally posted by: mnx12

More women are having similar feeling today. Is it worth investing personally, emotionally, financially in a relationship where returns may be totally unexpected. In a marriage, guy takes responsibility of the girl, he is marrying.

But girl is expected to take responsibility of his complete family. Earlier girls would tolerate almost everything in a marriage because of financial dependancy on their husband. Earning money gives them more confidence & more choices. 

If this trend continues,  then we may hear in nearest future- girls have become aalsi, they don't won't to work towards making marriage a success. So either way aalsi tag stays.😆 


@ Bold: I feel like this has already started. Not just girls, but boys as well. A lot of couples don't take marriage seriously anymore. They get into a marriage, decide it isn't working, and split up. There was literally this guy at one of my old jobs who got married and divorced all within the span of 2 months. And this is after being in a relationship with that girl for 8 years.


It's also why more and more young couples are looking at live-in as an option. It avoids all the mess and cost associated with marriage and divorce. If it works out, then they get married, but if it doesn't, then they can easily split up.

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Posted: 1 years ago

Originally posted by: Krantikari

No I was not alluding to the roles of prehistoric men and women at all. Gender based roles were prevalent in our societies not more than 1-2 generations ago, and they still are in a lot of places. The reason people had defined gender roles in the past was to lessen each other's burden, now if each person has to do double the work (and lets be honest women still do the majority of household work), how is that beneficial for them? 


I don't disagree that traditional gender norms still hold sway among large segments of the population in India but research has also shown that Indian adults with a college degree are less likely than those without a college degree to support conservative gender norms. Simply put, people with higher education are less likely to cling to stereotypes.


If, traditionally, Brahmins were teachers and Shudras laborers doing menial jobs, doesn't mean we will continue with that tradition in this day and age too. Same goes for traditional gender roles. Bread-winning, homemaking and care-giving have to be shared responsibilities between a husband and a wife. Obviously, it may not always be a 50-50 share in all departments at all times (some may earn less at times, some may earn more at times, some may do less work at times, some may do more work at times) but the expectation is for attitudes and behaviors on gender roles to become more egalitarian moving forward.


Originally posted by: Krantikari

What is progress and for whom? Please define it first and be specific. Also please explain how 'economic growth' benefits the average person.


Progress as in development. At the individual level, growth in per capita GDP increases the material standard of living for an average person. By average person, clearly we don't mean Tatas and Ambanis here, so two people earning, as opposed to one, would result in more disposable income for the family.


It is proving costly for countries to rely on the talents of only half of their population. Developing countries like India as well as developed countries like USA stand to gain if women participate in the labor force at the same rate as men and are employed at the same levels as men across sectors. Across countries, on an average, GDP per capita would be 20% higher if gender employment participation gaps were closed.

 

If you want a specific example, closing agricultural gender gaps supports food production. Increase in food production means more people are adequately nourished each year.


By citing progress/development I could also bring out equitable outcomes where a woman gets paid for the work she puts in (as a homemaker, she isn't getting paid) but I don't see much point to discussing what is right and what is wrong with you.


Originally posted by: Krantikari

Independent in what way? Again, please be specific. And what's wrong with being dependent btw?



Independent as in financially independent. Financial independence means having enough income or wealth to pay for your own expenses without additional assistance and to be in a financial situation in which you have enough money, either via income or accumulated wealth, to pay your expenses for the rest of your life without dependence on others.


When Yang divorces Ying or when Yang kicks the bucket, Ying should be able to take care of herself as well Ying-lets, if any, and that's only possible if she's financially independent.


Originally posted by: Krantikari

Women have never been and still aren't self-sufficient, because once again, they are not evolutionary evolved to do building and maintenance work. That is a man's job.


Can't legitimize this with a rebuttal.

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Posted: 1 years ago

Originally posted by: D_e_s_t_i_n_y

Yet to watch the video..


To tell you fact I have seen financial independent women struggling alot after marriage..


Because husband contribute less or doesn't contribute or whenever there is financial issue he depend on you and then you help them..and when times comes they wont even remembered that help.


And those who depend on husband for luxury life living happily...




Each and everything has its own pro and cons...

That's true. And some egoistic husbands even have a problem with their wife working or earning more than them. It can have a huge impact on a husband-wife relationship if the partner is not understanding.

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Posted: 1 years ago

Originally posted by: Bechain_Bulbul


And about working women, I want to share here a completely different perspective based on my experience. I work in public/govt sector and I am very disappointed at times to notice majority of women in this sector are actually lazy. For 10.30 office they come at 11.00 and also leave half an hour early, they have their royal 1 hour lunch and they always play woman card when something important, time consuming and critical work is assigned to them. Believe me they wont even shy away from crying in front of officers to avoid that work. I absolutely hate such women but unfortunately in my decade long career now I have mostly come across such women. These women are responsible for creating a image about women that they cant work, they cant handle pressure, they should not be promoted etc.

I understand that perception about govt. employees, both men and women, in general is a that of lazy bunch of people and I am also not saying that I hadn't found a male employee as lazy. But I can assure you things are changing rapidly. Gone are the days when people used to be traumatized on their visit to govt. Office. Now a days there is so much transperancy, the govt- citizen interface has improved drastically that govt employees are working as hard as private sector employees or may be even more. But the attitude of some women have not changed.

May be private sector is more demanding and there is cut throat competition so women there cant avoid work but we find lazy employees in private sector also.

I agree with your point. My father was working in govt school office and 2 ladies employee used to give pending work to my father and leave early. My Father had to work more to complete the work.

I am working in private sector and really admire some of woman employees who are hyper active even after having kids doing both job fabulously.

I would like to know what is your view on menstrual leave. It will be good for female employees but also burden male employees. Though 1 day in a month won't affect much but some woman can use it as mandatory holiday. 

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Posted: 12 months ago

Originally posted by: D_e_s_t_i_n_y

Yet to watch the video..


To tell you fact I have seen financial independent women struggling alot after marriage..


Because husband contribute less or doesn't contribute or whenever there is financial issue he depend on you and then you help them..and when times comes they wont even remembered that help.


And those who depend on husband for luxury life living happily...


Each and everything has its own pro and cons...

@bold - surprisingly I have seen this more.


I am a working Mom and I have been independent since I was 21. 

Relying on husband’s money and udaoing parents ke paise maje se girls are getting praised around me. Kuch padi nai hai. Mast shopping karo Aur tip tap banke ghumo. 

I am told that your husband cooks, tumhe Toh kuch nai karna padta. 🤷‍♀️

So I contribute equally financially - doesn’t matter but husband cooks is a privilege I have.