This was the ideal way to portray the remorse… alas we won’t be getting any of that from this PH! Loved Sahiba’s no nonsense and Angad’s repenting. Also Manveer was put in her place.Originally posted by: LifeDramaFicTns
Hello everyone..
Here I am with the second update on my take on the track forward in TMD. Hope you all reading this alternate version from my end. Somehow no matter what I just can't imagine - sahiba staying in the hell called brar mansion anymore...
Here you go..
........
FF - Shattered
Take 2 - Ashamed
Angad's POV
As expected the minute - Sahiba reaches the hall with me right behind her with my face all pale - everyone spots us and gets up from their respective spot at the dining table.
Daar ji, bebe, gurleen chachi, Veer are the firsts to eye Sahiba's suitcase behind her worriedly where as Muma, Jasleen bua, chachu, prabhjot bua, are the ones to glare at me hard in utter confusion- as if they were collectively wondering what was I doing coming out from Sahiba's room.
They look shell shocked. And honestly, I don't blame them...coz...I am still in shock over my own doing last night..
Shocked and Ashamed...
Daar Ji is the first one to step closer to Sahiba now whose standing in stony silence just looking at everyone look at her. Once again she's so rock solid in her stance that it makes me realise that there is a part of my mind that accepts that she's the most gutsy woman I have ever met. And perhaps everyone in my home including me perhaps have just had issues accepting her stony courageous guts..
As mom continues to gape at me in confusion - Daar ji asks Sahiba - " puttar...sahiba..yeh kya..??"
Before Sahiba can say anything - Muma asks me upfront gaping at me frazzled - " angad...yeh chal kya raha hai? Tum bolo??? Yeh tum sahiba ke kamre se kyun Nikle??"
Gurleen chachi asks Sahiba worried - " yeh suitcase leke kahan jaa rahi ho Sahiba?? Kya hogaya subah subah??"
Muma looks at gurleen chachi zapped - " gurleen yahan mujhe angad ki fikar hain aur tumhe iss ladki ki padi hai??"
Daar ji exclaims glaring at Muma - " manbeer...yeh ladki bhi kisi ki beti hai...yeh mat bhulo..."
My guilt continues to eat me up at that...within...
Bebe asks Sahiba for answers again just as Jasleen bua begins to ask me- " angad did you really just spend the night in Sahibas room??"
Wait. Is it just me or do you all agree that Jasleen bua freaking aiming to add fuel in the fire??? Has she always been like this? Why on earth have I not noticed this yet? AM I STUPID OR WHAT??
Oh perhaps I am...
Muma asks Jasleen bua to shut up before I can say anything and Muma looks at me for answers again. I am so embarrassed and ashamed. All the while - Sahiba's just standing in a stony determined silence - though.
Sahiba finally looks at me now and she states her voice all cold and unraveled even though her eyes tell me she was still reliving the trauma of it all. The trauma I inflicted on her - " kal raat kya hua...uski list main kholne lagi...toh yeh aapka beta...aap sab se kabhi nazrein nahi mila payega...jaise ki apne aap se nai mila paa raha hai abhi....kyun? Sahi kaha na maine angad...???"
Damm.
She is right about that...
Again - Sahiba Kaur Monga and her guts in full swing.A small voice from my heart chips in - Sahiba Kaur Brar...you mean.My brain reminds me I am standing with her signed annulment papers in my hand. She's walking out on the marriage and me..
Everyone's still gaping at me shocked and frazzled..
Momentarily, I don't seem to have it in me to meet anyone's eyes..so I just look here and there. What to do? Oh perhaps - better I just confess my own blunder? That is when it strikes me as I look at Sahiba briefly as shes still staring at me - that by asking me this kyun angad bit? She's just given me the chance to come out clean to everyone rather than her be the one to embarrass me in front of my family...
Everyone begins to frazzle to their peaks one by one and ask me now led by muma, gurleen chachi - " yeh kya keh rahi hai angad??"
I sigh as I finally take a deep breathe and look up at Daar ji who was eyeing me in a stony silence.Iv let him down. Let myself down. They surely didn't bring me up to become the sick version of myself last night..
Perhaps - the only way one can begin redemption for a solid wrong doing is by accepting it in the first place rather than seeking to throw blames around...
I gulp down my self guilt and shame as I nod and say to all - the gulp of it feeling like poison within - " sahi keh rahi hai sahiba..kal raat jo hua..uski list woh kholne lage...toh main sach mein aap sabse kabhi nazrein nai mila paunga...jaise ki apne aap se nai mila paa raha..isiliye...main hi..batata hun...aap sab ko...ki kya hua..."
Sahiba's eyes widen at that in shock as if she never expected me to do this. She still seems unaffected on the whole though. I continue though looking down at my shoes on the floor giving everyone the basic highlight- " I was drunk last night...so drunk...and I was angry...so angry...all I could think of was how much I hated sahiba...all I could think of was the betrayal..and...in my drunken stuper..all I can say is that I misbehaved with Sahiba in the way...I shouldn't ever have with her or with any woman foe that matter......thankfully she pushed me away from herself and I eventually ended up passing out drunk in her room...."
Stunned.Silence - is what consumes the vibe in the hall now as everyone gapes at me - in shock and shame - not knowing what to say...
Muma looks at me pale as a sheet - " yeh kya keh diya tumne angad...yeh kya??? Tum aisa kabhi kar hi nai sakte..yeh isi ki galti hogi?she lured you in her room right??"
Sahiba looks at her now in disbeleif as she says - " really?? Really manbeer ma'am...you blaming me for this? Yaad kariye..aap...aap ne hi mujhe room mein lock kiya tha bahar se..toh yeh main kaise karti thi? Haan??.."
What??? Muma was the one to lock Sahiba from the out? This is so unlike Muma...but we'll whatever I did is so unlike me too...
Everyone's now gaping at Muma shocked at that revelation from Sahiba and Muma is standing stunned not knowing what to say.
Sahiba finally clears her throat and looks at all one by one and says- " angad ki badtameezi ki details mein mujhe nai jaana..kyunki..mujhe ek second ke liye bhi woh ghatiya pal yaad nai karne...par aap sab itna samajh lijiye ...ki...iski iss harqat ke baad...main yahan bass reh hi nai sakti...meri rooh Marr hi jayegi agar mein ek second aur yahan rahi...nai chahiye mujhe yeh sab...yeh Mrs brar ka tag...yeh aap sab ki ameer deewarein jo mere liye sirf nark hai...main yahan safe feel nai karti...aur na kabhi kar sakungi...aur mujhe dekhke bhi aap sab trigger hi hote ho...toh sahi yahi hoga ki yeh drama ab yahi band karein...syaape ki ilawa kuch nai hai yeh natak...aur mujhe ab yeh syaapa manzoor nai...apne atma sammaan ki cost pe toh bilkul hi nai...," she pauses only because Gurleen chachi has stepped closer to her just then as she spots the marks on her wrist and her cheek now - the marks my hands left. The marks that are proof of my manhandling...
Babaji...I swear...I am drowning in shame and guilt...
Gurleen chachi asks flabbergasted - " yeh nishaan...tumhare wrists pe...cheek pe...yeh...kaise...angad??" She looks at me shaken.
That brings everyone's attention to Sahiba's wrist and face and all of a sudden the shock and shame is evident in everyone's eyes as Sahiba just stares at me cold and hard - knowing she didn't have to state the obvious. Sahiba sighs and asks Gurleen chachi now - " aap bhi ek ladki ki maa hai...haina...gurleen ma'am...ab aap hi bole...koi aapki beti ke saath aise badtmeezi kare? Aap kahengi usko uske saath rehne ke kiye???"
That puts gurleen chachi in freeze mode. Sahiba walks up to Daarji now whose eyes have welled up in shame along with bebe as they look at me in disbelief and she asks them - " daar ji...bebe...aap ki bhi do beteiyaan haan...aap bolo...koi unke saath aise kare? Aapko manzoor hoga?"
They shake their heads in a No at that before Muted and stunned Bebe tears up and touches Sahiba's shoulder at that and Daar ji just glares at me hard. Once again taking the opportunity- jasleen bua begins to add fuel to the fire by mocking muma for brining me up to be the one to not respect women/ manhandle them/ misbehave with them etc etc...
I don't have any words to add in my defence in the moment. I deserve this shaming in front of them. Muma is looking at me expecting me to say something but I just can't.
Amidst everyone's questions and taunts finally Daar ji roars - " bass....bass karo tum sab...angad...maafi mango...Sahiba se abhi se abhi...sabke saamne.."
I look up at that instantly and nod and take a step towards Sahiba and the way she cringes in her vibe at that and begins to step back holding her hand in front of me once again is a message for all to see that I have clearly traumatised her with her actions. She states at Daarji in disbelief though as she says frustrated- " maafi nai chahiye daar ji...maafi nai chahiye...azadi chahiye mujhe iss nark se...kal tak main sab seh rahi thi...par ab bass...aap sabki image bachane ke chukkar mein main khud ka gala nai got sakti...isiliye main jaa rahi hun...maine faisla kar liya hai...annulment ke papers sign kar diye hai maine...angad ke haath mein hai...sach chahe jitna bhi kadwa ho...sach hi sahi hai...aur sach yeh hai ki...mujhe Mrs Brar ka tag ab gawara nai..acting mein bhi gawara nai..."
Everyone gapes at the papers in my hand at that and I clutch them harder.
Daar ji gapes at Sahiba - " puttar yeh tu kya keh rahi hai..."
Veer comes to stand in sahibas defence at that as he gapes at me disbelief- " sahi toh keh rahi hai bhabhi...daar ji...mera toh dil baith gaya soch ke..ki maine angad bhai ko nai rota kal raat...unke pass jaate hue...mujhe hi rokna chahiye tha..toh yeh sab nai hota...."
Sahiba just looks at Daar ji at that as if he were the only she wanted to give more explanation - " aapne mujhpe bharosa kiya daar ji..aap mujhe yahan laaye...mujhe aapko badi respect hai...par apne aap ki bhi hai...main kisi aur ke liye apni aatma ko nai raakh bana sakti...aisa kiya toh mein rab ko kya shakal dikhayungi...aap maniye pls...aapne iss vyaah ki zidd karke..mere papaji ne iss vyaah ki zidd karke...angad aur mujhe nark mein dhakela...hai...aur yeh kuch din kaafi the yeh samjhne ke kiye...narq chahe sone( gold) ki ho...nark hi hoti hai..aur jiss jagah mera koi maan nai...izzat nai..meri safety nai..woh mere liye nark hai..woh nark jo kabhi ghar nai ho paayega...mujhe zindagi bhar ki saza manzoor nai...duniya ki thodi rusvayi main abh bhi seh lungi...par apne andar ki ghutan nai...dil ke sukoon ka koi mol nai daarji...koi mol nai...aur yeh aapka ghar ...mujhe sukoon toh kya ek pal ki saans bhi nai de sakta....mujhe nai manzoor yeh pinjra...yeh deewarein jahan koi sukh nai...koi sukh nai..."
That fron Sahiba just leads to Daar ji paling in his face at that. His face twitches in angst as he finally speaks now sitting with a thumb on the sofa and says out loud to all - " jaa sahiba tu jaa....tu jaana chahti hai toh jaa...tere saath jo hamare ghar mein galat hua..bass uske liye...main bahut sharminda hun...yeh jaan ke jaa...kaise maafi mangu pata nai.....main bhi tera gunhegaar hun puttar main bhi..."
And as we all gape at Daarji in shock at that- Sahiba looks totally relieved as if she could finally breathe and without looking at either of us even once she just touches Daar ji and Bebe's feet at that. She doesnt ask Daar ji to not feel guilt not wanting to state the obvious again perhaps? That he is at fault. She just stays completely silent post getting up from touching their feet and and finally walks out the door with her suitcase with her head held high...without ..looking back even once...as everyone begins to murmur amongst themselves - with me rooted to my spot ashamed and shocked still -
Jasleen bua is on and on now making Muma feel worse about me and the situation.Gurleen chachi stays mute in a disappointed silent along with Veer. Prabhjot bua joins Jasleen bua ...as muma looks at me in shock, shame and disbelief too..
And i cant seem to look at anyone though but the sight of sahiba's back as it finally vanishes from my line of vision. Its over. Its done. She has walked out - leaving me drowned in only truckloads of shame, guilt and remorse now more than ever as her last words continued to haunt my ears.
Perhaps if she would have looked back at me once just once -she would have spotted how much I was repenting ??Not that it mattered to her anyway.She doesn't give a damm about me and I can't really blame her..
Sahiba Kaur Monga had just given me exactly what I wanted. She'd just walked out of my home / my life just like I wanted. Then why am I LEFT standind here - suddenly feeling completley shattered within by the development?
.................
Tadaaaa!
How was that guys??? Hope you enjoyed reading this bit from my end. I am totally just penning down what I would have liked to see in the show...
Awaiting your feedback!
Much love × Gratitude Now and always
Prachi
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