The Second Wife -----Kalyani and Kashibai

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Posted: 5 months ago
Lots of people are drwaing semblamces between Radha and Kashibai . But I feel Radha is not and can never be Kashibai. Bajirao married Mastani for love and Baxi married Kalyani out of humanity. Kashibai was cheated by her husband and Baxi cheated Kalyani out of her rights and existence for Radha. Kashi gave refuge to her husband's second wife after knowing her identity . Will Radha scarifice her everything ---- (Kashibai requested her husband to never enter her room again )for her husband's second wife , will she take care of her husband's child born from his other wife .Intact I feel KALYANI to be the SECOND KASHIBAI --- the way she has sacrificed her every right as a wife (and her existence by hiding the truth) , the way she is taking care of her husband's unborn child indeed make a her a KASHIBAI figure although her position as the second wife would make her Mastani. And the irony of her fate is that her sacrifice and pain are unsung and unseen and neglected by both the audience and the people around her . Or does the feminist criticism of Radhamani's misery does not apply to the same husband's second wife just because she is his second wife or is the second wife not woman enough to love and be loved like the first ? Why is no one and I mean it , NO ONE seeing her misery --- what crime has she done ? A princess of her father and the kingdom , pampered and protected from every evil is suddenly thrown into a marriage where she is FORCED to witness her husband ROMANCE and cherish their NUPITAL BLISS literally infront of her eyes. She had been reduced to an asexual being , forced to kill her feminity and her desires and love for her husband . She cannot even crave for her husband's love and TOUCH because the audience will then blame her to be a HOMEWRCKER , a HUSBAND-SNATCHER and a characterless , immoral woman . And what an insult it is to Kalyani's womanhood !!!!!! Furthermore,She cannot even be jealous of her husband's love over his first wife because that would mean that she is a NEGATIVE character unlike her husband's all-goody first wife. But the goodness Radha is showing is in the darkness of Kalyani's identity . Radha also felt pangs of jealousy and interrupted Kalyani's staring at Baxi.To add to Kalyani's misery , Baxi's family treat her like a refugee eating out of their kindness. In the family rituals and gatherings she she is just an outsider and her eyes just wander here and there uncomfortably .
Posted: 5 months ago

Different people will see the same situation from different points of view. I don’t feel Baxi cheated Kalyani out of her wife rights. It was Badamba Naresh (BN) who gave a nonsensical reason to force BJ to marry Kalyani. Yes, she was hounded by Fletcher who would have married her by force, but this didn’t mean that BN should have forced a happily married BJ to marry Kalyani under the guise of a sandhi with their respective rajyas. BJ time and again warned Kalyani that he wouldn’t be able to give her a husband’s love and Kalyani also said that she was ready to sacrifice her marital life, if it meant that Badamba would enjoy the protection of BJ and his paika guards from the British rule. smiley29

I don’t know much about Kashibai, so forgive me for not being able to give a proper pov about her.  I don’t necessarily think that Kalyani’s pain is being ignored, the better way to put it is, nobody knows the truth yet about Kaxi marriage, and Kalyani herself is burning proofs and hiding and lying about the marriage from everyone, so I don’t necessarily see how Kalyani is Kashibai.. unless Kashibai also was the 2nd wife who hid her marriage from the other wife. Kalyani and BJ both are equally responsible for hiding such a big truth from RM. 

Again, Kalyani wasnt held at gunpoint to marry BJ who is happily married, and is now craving for BJ’s love and attention, something she herself had vowed to sacrifice for the welfare of Badamba. She isn’t a home wrecker, nor a husband snatcher but morality.. smiley32 that’s a whole new topic for discussion. Kalyani’s misery is compounded by her actively hiding her marriage from the family. smiley18

Also, another bad thing that’s driving away some viewers like me is the fact that they have completely changed the direction the story has taken. From a period drama, it’s changed to a regular soap that everyone can see if they switch on any Hindi serial channel. So unfortunately this hiding Kaxi marriage track will go on until the ratings go down or the makers run out of story to build on.. smiley11

phew! Such a long post.. congrats to anybody who was able to read the 
post in its entirety. I salute you all. 

Posted: 5 months ago
Originally posted by flutterby


Different people will see the same situation from different points of view. I don’t feel Baxi cheated Kalyani out of her wife rights. It was Badamba Naresh (BN) who gave a nonsensical reason to force BJ to marry Kalyani. Yes, she was hounded by Fletcher who would have married her by force, but this didn’t mean that BN should have forced a happily married BJ to marry Kalyani under the guise of a sandhi with their respective rajyas. BJ time and again warned Kalyani that he wouldn’t be able to give her a husband’s love and Kalyani also said that she was ready to sacrifice her marital life, if it meant that Badamba would enjoy the protection of BJ and his paika guards from the British rule. smiley29

I don’t know much about Kashibai, so forgive me for not being able to give a proper pov about her.  I don’t necessarily think that Kalyani’s pain is being ignored, the better way to put it is, nobody knows the truth yet about Kaxi marriage, and Kalyani herself is burning proofs and hiding and lying about the marriage from everyone, so I don’t necessarily see how Kalyani is Kashibai.. unless Kashibai also was the 2nd wife who hid her marriage from the other wife. Kalyani and BJ both are equally responsible for hiding such a big truth from RM. 

Again, Kalyani wasnt held at gunpoint to marry BJ who is happily married, and is now craving for BJ’s love and attention, something she herself had vowed to sacrifice for the welfare of Badamba. She isn’t a home wrecker, nor a husband snatcher but morality.. smiley32 that’s a whole new topic for discussion. Kalyani’s misery is compounded by her actively hiding her marriage from the family. smiley18

Also, another bad thing that’s driving away some viewers like me is the fact that they have completely changed the direction the story has taken. From a period drama, it’s changed to a regular soap that everyone can see if they switch on any Hindi serial channel. So unfortunately this hiding Kaxi marriage track will go on until the ratings go down or the makers run out of story to build on.. smiley11

phew! Such a long post.. congrats to anybody who was able to read the 
post in its entirety. I salute you all. 

BN forced Baxi and Baxi is a child who under force did a child marriage. BN forced Baxi but the decision was entirely HIS to marry or not to.Since he married he HAS to take the responsibility of his marriage. By hiding the truth of his marriage he did a breach of the only marriage vow he ever took with Kalyani ---- to give and protect her honour as his "wife "'at Rodhang.Didn't Baxi force her to hide the truth at the first place, in the middle she herself obliged out of her sympathy for Radha but time and again she warned Baxi to reveal the truth. On revealing the half truth of their marriage Baxi gunned her down ,had she revealed the whoke truth , he would have coffin-ed her by now. Kalyani had to sacrifice every right in the marriage for whatever reasons which NO woman would ever sacrifice. I just wanted to bring that into light. By the way she never asked any right from Baxi. If you speak about Kalyani's "immorality" then I must say that morality should be judged according to the society and era he lives. You cannot demean a Muslim man marrying his cousin sister as incest .similarly in 1817 it was very much "moral" and legal for the second wife to have equal right over her husband as the first .So why question Kalyani's morality? Regarding my lengthy post , you should be the first to be congratulated and thanked for reading my ENTIRE post (as I can see that you have covered almost all the issues I have raised) and having so much spare time to post such a LONGGG reply 😚😚😚Edited by imtheone - 5 months ago
Posted: 5 months ago
Originally posted by flutterby


Different people will see the same situation from different points of view. I don’t feel Baxi cheated Kalyani out of her wife rights. It was Badamba Naresh (BN) who gave a nonsensical reason to force BJ to marry Kalyani. Yes, she was hounded by Fletcher who would have married her by force, but this didn’t mean that BN should have forced a happily married BJ to marry Kalyani under the guise of a sandhi with their respective rajyas. BJ time and again warned Kalyani that he wouldn’t be able to give her a husband’s love and Kalyani also said that she was ready to sacrifice her marital life, if it meant that Badamba would enjoy the protection of BJ and his paika guards from the British rule. smiley29

I don’t know much about Kashibai, so forgive me for not being able to give a proper pov about her.  I don’t necessarily think that Kalyani’s pain is being ignored, the better way to put it is, nobody knows the truth yet about Kaxi marriage, and Kalyani herself is burning proofs and hiding and lying about the marriage from everyone, so I don’t necessarily see how Kalyani is Kashibai.. unless Kashibai also was the 2nd wife who hid her marriage from the other wife. Kalyani and BJ both are equally responsible for hiding such a big truth from RM. 

Again, Kalyani wasnt held at gunpoint to marry BJ who is happily married, and is now craving for BJ’s love and attention, something she herself had vowed to sacrifice for the welfare of Badamba. She isn’t a home wrecker, nor a husband snatcher but morality.. smiley32 that’s a whole new topic for discussion. Kalyani’s misery is compounded by her actively hiding her marriage from the family. smiley18

Also, another bad thing that’s driving away some viewers like me is the fact that they have completely changed the direction the story has taken. From a period drama, it’s changed to a regular soap that everyone can see if they switch on any Hindi serial channel. So unfortunately this hiding Kaxi marriage track will go on until the ratings go down or the makers run out of story to build on.. smiley11

phew! Such a long post.. congrats to anybody who was able to read the 
post in its entirety. I salute you all. 

To tell the truth ,I do not like love triangles , I came to see the story for its historical backdrop.I would really love to see the rebellion and one to one love story and my choice is kaxi.
Posted: 5 months ago

What morality ? From where dies morality comes from history ? Buxi jagbandhu do have 2 wives just u don't like one doesn't mean other one with removed. Morality  frictional show mein search karoge to aap ko kabhi nhi milegi. Are u trying to say women who marry married men in history lack morality ?



Shivaji married 8 times , acc 2 my knowledge his 3 wife was a very good friend of Sai bai who was first wife of shivaji.


Akbar had many wives & they were political alliances.


Lord Krishna had 16000 wives first 8 were his main queens .


Do tell me where will radhamani so called morality gone when in initial episode ask her MIL to get buxi married again as she can't conceive . Who gave her rights to spoil other women life if she can't share her husband with anyone then she has no right use other women body to get an heir , why can't see adopt a child ? For time being she is pregnant varna she may herself would tried to get kuxi married if not kalyani then some other lady  why coz she want an heir ?


I m sure she will use kalyani too to get a heir from her .


Isko kya kehte plz tell me ? Do tell how does kalyani or any other woman is responsible for radha not able give birth ?

Edited by Shake_d_spear - 5 months ago
Posted: 5 months ago

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Edited by Shake_d_spear - 5 months ago
Posted: 5 months ago

 

 

Edited by Shake_d_spear - 8 days ago
Posted: 5 months ago
Originally posted by imtheone


BN forced Baxi and Baxi is a child who under force did a child marriage. BN forced Baxi but the decision was entirely HIS to marry or not to.Since he married he HAS to take the responsibility of his marriage. By hiding the truth of his marriage he did a breach of the only marriage vow he ever took with Kalyani ---- to give and protect her honour as his "wife "'at Rodhang.Didn't Baxi force her to hide the truth at the first place, in the middle she herself obliged out of her sympathy for Radha but time and again she warned Baxi to reveal the truth. On revealing the half truth of their marriage Baxi gunned her down ,had she revealed the whoke truth , he would have coffin-ed her by now. Kalyani had to sacrifice every right in the marriage for whatever reasons which NO woman would ever sacrifice. I just wanted to bring that into light. By the way she never asked any right from Baxi. If you speak about Kalyani's "immorality" then I must say that morality should be judged according to the society and era he lives. You cannot demean a Muslim man marrying his cousin sister as incest .similarly in 1817 it was very much "moral" and legal for the second wife to have equal right over her husband as the first .So why question Kalyani's morality? Regarding my lengthy post , you should be the first to be congratulated and thanked for reading my ENTIRE post (as I can see that you have covered almost all the issues I have raised) and having so much spare time to post such a LONGGG reply 😚😚😚

I agree BJ wasn’t forced, but he was emotionally blackmailed to marry, which isn’t such a great thing at all. Time and again, he pledged his full support for BN and Badamba, I don’t recollect properly whether BJ told BN that he won’t be able to give Kalyani the love and respect of a husband, when he has RM as a doting, loving wife; but the latter was adamant and pleading with the former to marry his daughter. Yes, BJ forced Kalyani to keep quiet, but Kalyani on her part should have made greater efforts to tell the truth, even if BJ ‘gunned’ her down. Tali ek haath se nahi bajti. If you feel BJ wasn’t forced to marry Kalyani, and could have refused to marry her, then Kalyani too had all the opportunities to tell at least RM about her marriage to BJ, despite RM’s ill health, yet she also spoke half truths and doesn’t make any effort to explain her actions and her stay at Rodhang. 

I didn’t say Kalyani is immoral.. I just said that morality in her context is a whole different topic, mainly because the writing is inconsistent and lop sided. One time, we see that Kalyani yearns for her rights as a wife, and another, we see that she is ready to sacrifice her marital status for the welfare of Badamba. This smacks of lazy and inconsistent writing. One time, she says she has to tell the truth about her marriage, another time, she is explicit in hiding the very truth from everyone. There is no proper direction for both actually.. BJ and Kalyani, even RM for that matter. The poor, sloppy writing is to be blamed. 

Although I quoted your post, I meant it for everybody, even the silent readers. I was congratulating and thanking them, and no, it isn’t a question of having or not having spare time, one- you have to make the time, and two, I clearly was tired in writing so much, composing thoughts and typing them on a post that I didn’t read my post again.. before posting,that’s why the confusion and lack of clarity. 

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