Chapter 8
“Are you going to drop me?” Raavi asked as she packed her stuff.
Shiva just nodded as he continued looking at his laptop. Not working, just starring at it. His life was getting detached from him and he was letting it. He didn’t know how would He survive without her. He wanted to stop Raavi but he knew it was best she goes away. It was the best for both of them.
All of a sudden, the room was filled with the noise of the rain clattering on the huge French window in their room. Raavi avoided her packing and reached out to the window in a
jump. She opened the window and held out her hand relishing the feeling of the season's first raindrops on her hand. She had always loved rain.
Shiva looked at magnificent sight mesmerised. He didn’t remember when was the last time she enjoyed rain. It felt as if she had stopped loving rain just like she had stopped loving him. Raavi rushed towards the open balcony. She spread out her arms and closed her eyes, getting wet in rain. Seeing her welcoming rain like that, Shiva felt as if she was welcoming him and his love in her life too, but she shrugged away the thought as soon as it came in his mind.
Shiva stood there appreciating the beauty of his wife through his eyes. Seeing her playing in the rain, a realization dawned upon him- the realization that he had unknowingly snatched away her innocence, her childishness, her own self. The desire that sparkled in his eyes moments ago changed to longing- The longing to be with the same old Raavi with who he initially fell in love with.
He stepped out in the rain, not minding the droplets drenching him. Raavi, who was lost in her own bliss stopped dancing realising his presence.
They stood there in moments of silence trying to read each other's minds.
Without saying anything, Shiva just held out his hand asking for a dance. Raavi looked at him unable to register what was going in his mind. As a teenager, she had fantasized about dancing with him in the rains, just like those cute romantic fictions.
She took his hand and both danced to an unknown rhythm of love. Their hand clasped, their eyes boring into each other's hearts.
His arms went around her waist at first and hers around his neck. Slowly her hands dropped to his waist and his rose to her shoulders, hugging her body to his adage snuggled into his chest, till they were both comfortable. They just moved their feet and let their bodies swing, enjoying the feel of each other's bodies, encased in each other's embrace.
Shiva lifted her head up, cupping her face with his palms, admiring her innocent beauty. She closed her eyes in anticipation of the moment she had always dreamt of. He kissed her forehead.
"I love you, Raavi."
He finally said what she always wanted to heard, she finally heard what he always wanted to say.
Raavi's tears mixed with raindrops as they fell down her cheeks. Shiva wiped them instantly, shaking his head, indicating her to stop crying. She leaned in his hands which were on her cheeks.
"You realise this after deciding to divorce me? When you decide to push me away from you?”
“Raavi, I…”
“Why do you always take stupid decisions, Shiva? Why can’t you at least discuss with me before that? Why didn’t you ask me if I even want to stay away from you.”
“I thought that’s what you wanted. You said that you are living a broken marriage. I don’t want you to compromise with anything, not anymore. I forced you into this loveless life so I…”
“You knew I loved you, didn’t you?” she cut him. “Still you chose to force me into marrying you.”
“I did.” He sighed. “But I wasn’t left with an option. I couldn’t think anything else at that time. To be honest, there wasn’t any choice left. You were running away.”
“You had a choice God dammit!” Raavi yelled. “You could have talked to me. You could have told me that I don’t have to run away. You could have told me that you were paying my father’s loans and I don’t have to marry a stranger.”
“And then?” Shiva yelled back. “What would have happened after that? You father would have taken more loans and he would have decided the same for you again. Now that you are my wife, at least he can’t… wait a minute. How did you know that I pay the money for your dad?”
To say that Shiva was shocked would be an understatement. He had tried his best to conceal this from her.
“That’s not the point,” Raavi furrowed her eyebrows. “Even if my dad could do that, you didn’t need to marry me forcefully. We could have talked it out. We could have been married happily.”
She said and reality hit Shiva. Raavi was right. He could have proposed her, he could have confessed his feelings for her. But his one impulse decision spoiled everything.
“You belonged to me Raavi, I couldn’t see you going away.”
“Really? Then why are you pushing me away from you? How could you hand me divorce papers just like that? It was your decision to marry me, I can at least decide whether I want to divorce you or not, can’t I?”
“Raavi,” Shiva cupped her face. “I don’t know how you got to know about the loan thing. I don’t even want to know. I never wanted you to know about that. I don’t want you to stay with me to repay for what I did for you. I want you to accept me because you love me.”
“Shiva, even if I wasn’t aware of the reason of this marriage I wouldn’t have agreed for a divorce. I might be angry with you but I never stopped loving you. Only if you have told me yourself years back, I wouldn’t have wasted 5 years of my life being angry on you,” Raavi said as tears rolled her eyes again. “But as usual, you have taken a decision for me. I have signed the papers, you have made arrangements for me to live a better life and I’ll now have to leave you. Come on, my packing is almost done.”
He held her hand while she was going and turned her around gently.
“Will you let me take another decision for you? Will you stop if I tell you so?”
“Why don’t you try?”
Shiva pulled her into a hug and the rain kept drenching them.
“Please don’t leave me, Raavi. You are my life. I won’t be able to live if you leave me. Please don’t go!” he cried like a baby.
Unable to hold herself back, Raavi deposited herself next to his chest while his arms grabbed her back and she let her tears lose again. She opened her clenched fist and wrapped her arm around Shiva's back caressing it as slowly. After a while she tightened her grip. His touch flaring her. Shiva held her tighter.
“Say it, Raavi.”
“What?” she asked still engulfed in the hug.
“That you love me.” He said pulling back.
“I love you,” Raavi said as she pressed her lips into his.
to be continued....
I hope you guys like it :)
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