Ishqi - Ahaan Relationship - My take - Page 3

I wrote this in the other thread as well but might as well copy it here as it I think can lay a part on Ahaan’s knee jerk reactions and innate need to protect.

So as we mentioned regarding the chachi dialog for not letting get another woman be abused, I agree this is likely due to Ahaan’s father being abusive towards Savitri. Also the innate need to protect by Ahaan - I think this stems from childhood trauma. He probably has suppressed memories that witnessed this abuse. He must have had a soft corner for his mom in his youth but that was completely overtaken and indoctrinated by Dadi. Hence we see Dadi time and again only spewing lies of infidelity and unsanskari aurat on Savitri. Usually such kids have a hard time remembering their childhood trauma because they can’t figure out whether it’s a figment of imagination or something they experienced in younger years. I think Ahaan was old enough to understand this but young enough to be molded by Dadi into thinking otherwise and suppressing all those bitter memories.

Originally posted by: esprit_00

I wrote this in the other thread as well but might as well copy it here as it I think can lay a part on Ahaan’s knee jerk reactions and innate need to protect.

So as we mentioned regarding the chachi dialog for not letting get another woman be abused, I agree this is likely due to Ahaan’s father being abusive towards Savitri. Also the innate need to protect by Ahaan - I think this stems from childhood trauma. He probably has suppressed memories that witnessed this abuse. He must have had a soft corner for his mom in his youth but that was completely overtaken and indoctrinated by Dadi. Hence we see Dadi time and again only spewing lies of infidelity and unsanskari aurat on Savitri. Usually such kids have a hard time remembering their childhood trauma because they can’t figure out whether it’s a figment of imagination or something they experienced in younger years. I think Ahaan was old enough to understand this but young enough to be molded by Dadi into thinking otherwise and suppressing all those bitter memories.

What makes me wonder is usually abuse is a learned behavior. So, Was Daadi abused by her husband but never fought against it? She could have been lucky and he became bhagwan ko pyaara very early but that probably stems to let her think her bahu should have put up with abuse.

I am thinking like this only because she is nice to Karthik's mom, so she might not be a bad Mother in law to begin with.

She always talked about how her saas was horrid and that’s how it is in life 

Originally posted by: esprit_00

She always talked about how her saas was horrid and that’s how it is in life 

Makes perfect sense.

Originally posted by: esprit_00

Based on today's episode I feel like Ahaan going in bitter toxic mode isn't for Ishqi leaving Mayank at the altar or the latter's family being destroyed. It played a role in his self-destruct mode but it is not the reason for his anger towards her. 

I think he is more upset that she didn't tell him the entire reason for it. Even if she had just done it for her feelings, he would have been upset but gotten over it (as he mentioned earlier on Friday episode). I don't know but the last bit today when he is talking to himself and asks why she left Mayank... and adds "Woh bhi us waqt tab... main aur Ishqi ek doosre ke itne Paa.."  Ahaan did not want to hear the half truth because he was at a point in this relationship that he needed her to be completely candid and she was not in a position to speak the complete truth.

I think her silence irked him... but rather than understanding that silence, his obsession just made him extremely bitter in life. After today, I am certain (sanskaars or not) he would have married her, if she had only told him why she left Mayank. It's in his nature to know the specifics especially when it comes to Ishqi. There have been a few dialogs of Ahaan since a few episodes now that reflect this. I think somewhere he just needed to hear the complete truth and he would have left everything to be with her but he needs to understand some truths are better left unspoken and that he has to trust the partner and have faith.

Ishqi will forgive him in time - but she may not be willing to trust him again. Because from her perspective, he needed proof or reason to believe her - her word wasn't good enough. I think there was a dialog in Humsafar, which can work here too like "yeh kaise muhabbat hai jis mein bharosa hi nahi tha" ... something like that.

Ya, he was angry at her bcause she didn’t confide in him . After the pool incident he thought she will never ever hide anything from him bcause they had developed that level of trust. Ishqi also would have told him the truth as he expected had Sonu allowed her . As you said Ahaan also need to understand there is a level of transparency in every relation and you can’t just simply be bare infront of the people you love . There is some private space and private decisions which she has the right to take and even not tell the reason about it . He needs to just trust her and go with the flow . Here’s where he made mistake by not trusting her silence and accusing her silence . If he had known Ishqi so much he would not have asked for proofs . 
When it comes to Ishqi he wants to know everything even if she wants or not . This is a strict case of trespassing her privacy . What I mean he is territorial. She is a grown up girl and she can make decisions and she doesn’t need to explain it to anyone be it her lover also . It’s completely her choice whether to confide or not . You can’t just pressure her . Ahaan is doing that . His behaviour needs to be mended . As he approaches and hold Ishqi close enough that there is no breathing space btw them his heart and mind is holding her even more close almost overlapping . He is literally forcing himself upon her ( not in that way) and it’s high time he recognise his limits and flaws . All thi is bcause she is distancing away from him and he can’t handle it .It’s only Ishqi and her love who can handle and pacify this desperate and violent Ahaan . 
Yesterday I noticed one thing in Ahaan’s behaviour . He was angry and worried at her for not telling him her maasa used to abuse her . He was like how can u hide such a thing from me . That’s y I told Ahaan thinks he holds all the right on her even more than herself . 

All this is bcause their relation have no name and both are not committed towards each other . They haven’t promised anything each other but Ahaan has already done everything in his mind to Ishqi . And she has not reciprocated it. So he is always in a fear of losing her and that’s adding more pain to him.

Originally posted by: esprit_00

I wrote this in the other thread as well but might as well copy it here as it I think can lay a part on Ahaan’s knee jerk reactions and innate need to protect.

So as we mentioned regarding the chachi dialog for not letting get another woman be abused, I agree this is likely due to Ahaan’s father being abusive towards Savitri. Also the innate need to protect by Ahaan - I think this stems from childhood trauma. He probably has suppressed memories that witnessed this abuse. He must have had a soft corner for his mom in his youth but that was completely overtaken and indoctrinated by Dadi. Hence we see Dadi time and again only spewing lies of infidelity and unsanskari aurat on Savitri. Usually such kids have a hard time remembering their childhood trauma because they can’t figure out whether it’s a figment of imagination or something they experienced in younger years. I think Ahaan was old enough to understand this but young enough to be molded by Dadi into thinking otherwise and suppressing all those bitter memories.

Very true , Ahaan’s innate needs to protect and provide came from his own subconscious mind where he might have buried all the vague memories . Daadi has later programmed him in a sanskaari version and even fed him with hate for his mom . Ahaan's actions reflect Daadis upbringing. Hats off to ur vision regarding Ahaan’s innate needs 

Excellent write up! 

Plus he always found her attractive, that scene where he is listing all her "bad habits" to Kartik and Sonu.... and they teased him "Bhai looks to aap bhi mante ho"

I too feel shouldn't have any wedding of ishqaan yet... their relationship needs to develop more and have an understanding which lack for now.and also i want to see ahaans support to ishqi against dadi...he needs to change his 1920s soch,there is alot of difference's between ishqaan which needs to be solved before they get married.hopefully guls notices this which is highly unlikely

Originally posted by: DailySoapBai

Excellent write up!

Thank you so much dear 

Originally posted by: jacinta_91

I too feel shouldn't have any wedding of ishqaan yet... their relationship needs to develop more and have an understanding which lack for now.and also i want to see ahaans support to ishqi against dadi...he needs to change his 1920s soch,there is alot of difference's between ishqaan which needs to be solved before they get married.hopefully guls notices this which is highly unlikely

Hope Gul realises what we are expecting and show us their character development and progress instead of this rushed marriage . Moreover Ishqi should not forgive Ahaan so easily . Let him earn it .