I am still with sameer - Page 2

When he said he is in bad mood and will say wrong things why she didn't leave him Alone instead she said kuch bhi bolo Mujhe bura Nahin lagega. Toh kehdiya na use but he was talking nonsense and she didn't like it. she also agravated him by holding his collar and said you never understand the value of love and always doosron PE blame karte ho ki woh tumhe chodke jaate hain isliye log tumhe chod ke jaate hain and he did so much for her chachaji woh toh paani mein Gaya na.

How come he slaps and he is wrong and she slaps is correct.

Originally posted by: Deepanand

When he said he is in bad mood and will say wrong things why she didn't leave him Alone instead she said kuch bhi bolo Mujhe bura Nahin lagega. Toh kehdiya na use but he was talking nonsense and she didn't like it. she also agravated him by holding his collar and said you never understand the value of love and always doosron PE blame karte ho ki woh tumhe chodke jaate hain isliye log tumhe chod ke jaate hain and he did so much for her chachaji woh toh paani mein Gaya na.

How come he slaps and he is wrong and she slaps is correct.

Originally posted by: Deepanand

When he said he is in bad mood and will say wrong things why she didn't leave him Alone instead she said kuch bhi bolo Mujhe bura Nahin lagega. Toh kehdiya na use but he was talking nonsense and she didn't like it. she also agravated him by holding his collar and said you never understand the value of love and always doosron PE blame karte ho ki woh tumhe chodke jaate hain isliye log tumhe chod ke jaate hain and he did so much for her chachaji woh toh paani mein Gaya na.

How come he slaps and he is wrong and she slaps is correct.

She is also wrong .She needed to give space and stop there only.but one learns all this by time and experience. And yes never speak about those issues which are touchy specially when angry.but still slaping both wise was wrong.

Any kind of physical violence, destroying property and threatening behaviour is domestic violence.So slapping was WRONG on both sides. Other times too it was wrong. No one has the right to hit their domestic partner/ spouse weather they committed a mistake or irked them.
Slapping or hitting and then blaming the other person for it, constantly demeaning ur partner or hitting because she/ he made u do it is not an excuse. There should be Zero tolerance for physical violence in a marriage.
There is something called cycle of violence. Please read on it.
Both were wrong. No one should hit. However no one should take it lying down either.
I am not with Sameer on this one. If one blew up every time they had a bad day at office then marriages would be battleground and all marriages will end up in court.
Sanchita

I am still with both of them Deepa...my heart absolutely went out to both yesterday...

This is completely my POV no offence to anyone.

  When I watched the episode again and then I realised that why he slapped her?

You know but it strangely reminded me a movie of Aishwarya Rai. I don't remember much details but only some of it.

Situations are completely different here but state of mind is so similar of these characters.

She gets charged for her husbands murder and she was in an abusive relationship for so long.

Nandita Das's character is in her defending team. They want to save her and gets the custody of her kid.

There was one line by Nandita  about a situation that one day she just snapped by this abuse and she took a step for herself and she did this act to free herself because she couldn't take it anymore abuse that was her breaking point.

Aishwarya's breaking point to that abuse at that time  and the act she did they use for her defence.

If you see Sameer also had listened to this taunts  from his childhood that everybody just leave him nobody wants to stay with him he doesn't deserve to be loved.

He listened to those taunts from Somani,his own Mom  Dadi that time he didn't care for it but when Naina said all those things to him a girl he loved more than anyone,fought with everyone to marry her he just couldn't take it and that was the breaking point for him to all those taunts people putting him down all the time and that he is good for nothing and can't do anything.

It's like all his fears,his insecurities from childhood,fear of that abandonment from loved ones rose in front of eyes. She hurt him where it hurts the most his fear of abandonment and he raised his hand on her.

See everyone has their breaking point. How much anyone can tolerate?

He always tolerated those taunts but he couldn't tolerate when Naina said this. He expected that anyone can say this  to him and I don't even care but she will never say this that I am not worthy of love. She loves me despite my flaws.

When a girl you love with your whole being says this that you are not worthy of love and no one can stay with you. What he  would've done?

I am not at all justifying this act but I am just trying to understand his state of mind here.

Sameer Maheshwari we know he will never raise his hand on any girl here His Naina we are talking about and he did this to her.

A girl whom he can't even dared to hurt her in his dreams but he hurt her why?

TBH my Heart went to him. We can clearly see he was not at all present there with Naina. He was just there physically but his mind was somewhere lost in his fears,insecurities and anger towards Mama.

The human side in me says it's ok forgive him for the mistake as the saying To Err is Human To Forgive is Divine but the wife in me says no let him suffer little bit.

Saying things in anger, abusing each other calling names cursing each other... all are acceptable at some way because though u r emotionally hurting each other... u r not physically crossing the line...

Originally posted by: 90sgal

I am still with both of them Deepa...my heart absolutely went out to both yesterday...

I know the slaps seemed OTT..but actually theyre not..in the heat of the moment they can happen...

And I know what youre saying that Naina should have backed off and left him in peace at that time...I too while watching was like " Back off girl"...but see it doesnt happen like that in reality...you get carried away in the heat of the moment and what Naina did was very realistic ..go after him and try to patch up even though he was not in the mood...as an objective viewer we see things in different perspective...but when youre in a fight of this level..its difficult to think objectively...:-)

Yes I agree with you mrugali that in the heat of the moment things happen. I am saying that I am still with sameer because he was not the only one who was wrong here. Thalli toh dono haaton se bajti hain and naina too said things and both of them slapped each other in the heat of the moment. I wouldn't say a domestic violence coz naina Gave it back to him properly and both of them are hurting each other.

Ashi deva bangayi

@ashi_deva

I feel both were wrong but situation was more wrong. Haven't we all experienced bad days and our reaction to the same situation is very different when we are experiencing a regular day?