Posted:
I was eagerly waiting for Naina at the college. Its been three weeks since Chacha ji and Munna agreed to our relationship. And Naina was the GS of our college. Was I happy ?? Oh Yes !! It was like getting my life back. I was able to breath. I again started watching the colours of the world , it didnt matter if it was morning or night. Started enjoying rain and kids playing in the rain, watched flower bloom in the early hours and talked to the moon with out a tear in my eye. My poems were more on a happier note ...everything suddenly started looking beautiful and every task seemed like a cake walk.That is ths effect that NAINA AGARWAL had on SAMEER MAHESHWARI.
Before she came into my life I had only recognised the night sky and moon as they gave company during my loneliness. I only had friends with needs and I would willingly do anything for them even with out thinking it was right or wrong as I needed people around me. I was searching for someone who would stand by me like the way my Nanu has done for me. Call it the hand of god , that he places Naina in my life just a year before Nanu left me and this world forever. I have to admit even the distance hadnt stopped Naina from being the strength of my life . While in Delhi , the paths that I choose to live was crude and dangerous. Not something that any person should pursue. I thought I would perish in the fury of my loniless. Thats when my friends brought a RED ROSE from her reminding me that I was not alone . There was this girl who was waiting for me, the guiding light my life. I again picked up the pieces of my life, started concentrating on good things in life just for her sake. I decided to keep myself occupied so that the devil doesnt enter my world again. Was that easy , especially when you are living with people who are ready to destroy you ?? Not really , my step fathers mother was one such person who thought of me as a hindrance to her grandchildren's happiness. This time she said I was born cursed to bring misery to people who loved me. That did it!!, because my past was filled with loosing people I loved the most , my dad, my Nanu and I couldnt loose her . At no cost . I didnt care if she was married to someone else as long as she was happy and alive. At least that is what I thought while I packed my bags to Ahmedabad. I avoided her for days but that did not stop her from teaching me that love is eternal. There is no end to it and to love you need courage. I was
happy that I had a girl in my life who was much stronger in character than me. I felt my Nanu was right , Naina would teach me the essence of life. For a movement I had forgotten she is as human as me. Amidst all my pain , my need to be loved and depressed state of mind , I forgot that, we as a couple had to be each others strength .
Problems drop into our lives like those meteorites fall on earth destroying every breath of life , which took a life time for us to create. That's how it was when Naina in her blue salwar suit sat in my car and declared that we are never going
to be together as our relationships will never be accepted. She not even, once waited for a moment to see my reaction or ask my opinion. She just decided it for US. My whole world came crashing . The boy who came to Ahmedabad thinking he can live with out his Naina just for her happiness and safety was not able to breath with out her. How did this happen ? I had no answer to my questions.
When we dont have answers we always look up to god and people who followed the path of god by renunciation . Yess!! That's what I thought I should do . RENUNCIATE. PERIOD. For once I was clear ,what I was going to do but before that, one last time I wanted to see her and talk to her. I reached college , but what I heard and saw changed my mind . Here I was thinking of leaving all worldly pleasures for her and she on the other hand was embracing a new life with a new man . WOW !! Thats not acceptable . If she can move on with out me then so can I . Even with a better partner in life. I have read that when one is depressed or confused never take a decision. I did break the very same rule many times and every time I fell in trouble and this time was no different. But I learn my lessons fast , hence came out of that "NEW" relationship with out getting hurt . At least I didnt but that was not the case with the "OTHER NEW LADY " in question.All I can say is some how I managed to sneak my way out of that relationship before it caused more harm to me and my sanity. Again thanks to Naina who forwarded the hands of "FRIENDSHIP" so that we both could move on in life with out looking at our past with hatred. I somehow accepted the truth that she is never going to be my girl, probably she never was...so best was to accept the hand of friendship for her happiness and my peace of mind.
I was back to my old self. At least this time even when I pretended , it didnt hurt that much. There was no negative thought about her or our relationship that we shared. The friendship card had helped. Then , the next day heard she broke her engagement and I was back with a mind to get her back in my life even when my friends told me that she has moved on.
Where does a man in love listen to sensible talks?? All he sees is his goal , his girl , his love and his life !! There I go again , ONLY TO BE REJECTED BY HER. WOW and WOW !! is all I could say !! I hated that moment and I could see what Munna was trying to tell me all the while. He was right , absolutely right. As I walked out of college I saw her arguing with a guy. One look at him and I knew who it was. So he was back in her life and this time , the only plus point I saw was that, I was NOT THE ONLY ONE who got rejected . He was also being thrown out of her life. What followed next took the breath out of me. Yes , I hated her but could I see her being man handled by someone else? HELL NO!! She didnt need me, she doesnt care for me anymore ..thats OK. BUT I DO. I DO CARE FOR HER. THE MAN IN ME didnt think for a second . I rushed to be that wall which would take every pain and every stone that was meant for her. Guess what , I broke his high headed NOSE. I WAS SO HAPPY SEEING HIM bleed.I thought chacha ji will be happy seeing me standing and helping his daughter like Naina. I was wrong , after all he was Rakesh Sir's brother. Even the sensible one couldnt understand my love for THEIR NAINA. I had to get angry and scream loud to tell him how wrong he was and how cruel his Naina was . How she had rejected me not once but twice for him. I had to tell him how hurt I was. I had to remind him that I was human and my eyes could never see her being ill treated.
Probably this won his heart and agreed to our relationship. Thats when my friend said that Naina could do the same act for others of her family. She could reject me again. This time I decided to go by his mind. Once bitten twice shy ...well , but this lady of mine wanted to prove Munna was wrong and none thought she was capable of pulling up such a stunt. Once we got her out of her self destructing mode, she was very embarrassed about what she did. Finally every one was happy and our relationship was back on track.
Here she comes , in her beautiful blue salwar suit. I always thought she looked her best in this attire. That blue accentuated the contours of her body and blue was my favorite colour too. She looked at me and gave one of those heavenly smiles which would take the breath away from any sane person. But today , it was different. I was not able to return that smile with the same vigor. She came and sat next to me and all I could do is , get up and walk away from the class with out a word. I hated that dress and that blue. I even hated the sky which reflect that blue. Perceptions change with time...so does liking with time and experience. This experience had taught me great lessons which I didnt learn even when Nanu left me .
Why did I hate that dress?? After all its not the dress who ditched me, right?? Its her ...what if she
does it again...and what if her family doesnt accept me ...she is the topper and GS of our college...and me?? Does that mean I dont love her anymore?? ...I DONT KNOW ...
PS : Was missing our show. Three days seems a long time...so thought of something of my own...Want to read more ?? Do let me know your thoughts on this one. Eagerly waiting for all your comments.
Before she came into my life I had only recognised the night sky and moon as they gave company during my loneliness. I only had friends with needs and I would willingly do anything for them even with out thinking it was right or wrong as I needed people around me. I was searching for someone who would stand by me like the way my Nanu has done for me. Call it the hand of god , that he places Naina in my life just a year before Nanu left me and this world forever. I have to admit even the distance hadnt stopped Naina from being the strength of my life . While in Delhi , the paths that I choose to live was crude and dangerous. Not something that any person should pursue. I thought I would perish in the fury of my loniless. Thats when my friends brought a RED ROSE from her reminding me that I was not alone . There was this girl who was waiting for me, the guiding light my life. I again picked up the pieces of my life, started concentrating on good things in life just for her sake. I decided to keep myself occupied so that the devil doesnt enter my world again. Was that easy , especially when you are living with people who are ready to destroy you ?? Not really , my step fathers mother was one such person who thought of me as a hindrance to her grandchildren's happiness. This time she said I was born cursed to bring misery to people who loved me. That did it!!, because my past was filled with loosing people I loved the most , my dad, my Nanu and I couldnt loose her . At no cost . I didnt care if she was married to someone else as long as she was happy and alive. At least that is what I thought while I packed my bags to Ahmedabad. I avoided her for days but that did not stop her from teaching me that love is eternal. There is no end to it and to love you need courage. I was
happy that I had a girl in my life who was much stronger in character than me. I felt my Nanu was right , Naina would teach me the essence of life. For a movement I had forgotten she is as human as me. Amidst all my pain , my need to be loved and depressed state of mind , I forgot that, we as a couple had to be each others strength .
Problems drop into our lives like those meteorites fall on earth destroying every breath of life , which took a life time for us to create. That's how it was when Naina in her blue salwar suit sat in my car and declared that we are never going
to be together as our relationships will never be accepted. She not even, once waited for a moment to see my reaction or ask my opinion. She just decided it for US. My whole world came crashing . The boy who came to Ahmedabad thinking he can live with out his Naina just for her happiness and safety was not able to breath with out her. How did this happen ? I had no answer to my questions.
When we dont have answers we always look up to god and people who followed the path of god by renunciation . Yess!! That's what I thought I should do . RENUNCIATE. PERIOD. For once I was clear ,what I was going to do but before that, one last time I wanted to see her and talk to her. I reached college , but what I heard and saw changed my mind . Here I was thinking of leaving all worldly pleasures for her and she on the other hand was embracing a new life with a new man . WOW !! Thats not acceptable . If she can move on with out me then so can I . Even with a better partner in life. I have read that when one is depressed or confused never take a decision. I did break the very same rule many times and every time I fell in trouble and this time was no different. But I learn my lessons fast , hence came out of that "NEW" relationship with out getting hurt . At least I didnt but that was not the case with the "OTHER NEW LADY " in question.All I can say is some how I managed to sneak my way out of that relationship before it caused more harm to me and my sanity. Again thanks to Naina who forwarded the hands of "FRIENDSHIP" so that we both could move on in life with out looking at our past with hatred. I somehow accepted the truth that she is never going to be my girl, probably she never was...so best was to accept the hand of friendship for her happiness and my peace of mind.
I was back to my old self. At least this time even when I pretended , it didnt hurt that much. There was no negative thought about her or our relationship that we shared. The friendship card had helped. Then , the next day heard she broke her engagement and I was back with a mind to get her back in my life even when my friends told me that she has moved on.
Where does a man in love listen to sensible talks?? All he sees is his goal , his girl , his love and his life !! There I go again , ONLY TO BE REJECTED BY HER. WOW and WOW !! is all I could say !! I hated that moment and I could see what Munna was trying to tell me all the while. He was right , absolutely right. As I walked out of college I saw her arguing with a guy. One look at him and I knew who it was. So he was back in her life and this time , the only plus point I saw was that, I was NOT THE ONLY ONE who got rejected . He was also being thrown out of her life. What followed next took the breath out of me. Yes , I hated her but could I see her being man handled by someone else? HELL NO!! She didnt need me, she doesnt care for me anymore ..thats OK. BUT I DO. I DO CARE FOR HER. THE MAN IN ME didnt think for a second . I rushed to be that wall which would take every pain and every stone that was meant for her. Guess what , I broke his high headed NOSE. I WAS SO HAPPY SEEING HIM bleed.I thought chacha ji will be happy seeing me standing and helping his daughter like Naina. I was wrong , after all he was Rakesh Sir's brother. Even the sensible one couldnt understand my love for THEIR NAINA. I had to get angry and scream loud to tell him how wrong he was and how cruel his Naina was . How she had rejected me not once but twice for him. I had to tell him how hurt I was. I had to remind him that I was human and my eyes could never see her being ill treated.
Probably this won his heart and agreed to our relationship. Thats when my friend said that Naina could do the same act for others of her family. She could reject me again. This time I decided to go by his mind. Once bitten twice shy ...well , but this lady of mine wanted to prove Munna was wrong and none thought she was capable of pulling up such a stunt. Once we got her out of her self destructing mode, she was very embarrassed about what she did. Finally every one was happy and our relationship was back on track.
Here she comes , in her beautiful blue salwar suit. I always thought she looked her best in this attire. That blue accentuated the contours of her body and blue was my favorite colour too. She looked at me and gave one of those heavenly smiles which would take the breath away from any sane person. But today , it was different. I was not able to return that smile with the same vigor. She came and sat next to me and all I could do is , get up and walk away from the class with out a word. I hated that dress and that blue. I even hated the sky which reflect that blue. Perceptions change with time...so does liking with time and experience. This experience had taught me great lessons which I didnt learn even when Nanu left me .
Why did I hate that dress?? After all its not the dress who ditched me, right?? Its her ...what if she
does it again...and what if her family doesnt accept me ...she is the topper and GS of our college...and me?? Does that mean I dont love her anymore?? ...I DONT KNOW ...
PS : Was missing our show. Three days seems a long time...so thought of something of my own...Want to read more ?? Do let me know your thoughts on this one. Eagerly waiting for all your comments.
comment:
p_commentcount