CHAPTER ONE
[Anant' s pov]
"Bhai..."
Ritz's cold voice brought me to the real world. When she came to my room, I was in deep thoughts. I was rethinking about the events, which happened today, I was reliving this day, which caused difference between my dad and me. When I looked up at the door, I saw my baby sister who came with my dinner. She was still wearing her legenga, which I gifted, for her engagement today. However, the happiness, which anyone could see in the, to be bride's face, was not there in my Ritz's face. It was void of any emotions. Her face was pale; those eyes were showing poor dislike toward me. Her that shattered look made me guiltier for what I did.
"Bhai"
My reveries again Brocken by Ritz's voice, she made me realize that I am still in my thoughts. Then I looked up again.
"Bhai your dinner, please have it." She told without any emotion.
I stood up from my chair, and went near her, but she stopped me by showing her mehndi filled right palm to my face. It was bright red. In addition, red and green bangles were adding beauty to it. Moreover, she continued.
"Bhai I am not interested in your sorry. Whatever you did was wrong and like other times I will not support you this time. Now your Ritz will stand against you. And I am sure Ranbir will fully support me."
"Ritz" I tried to interrupt her
"I only want that you repent for your mistake before it will be too late." She totally ignored my intentions to talk to her.
After that, she too went to her room as dad did in the evening, without hearing what I wanted to say.
After the talk between dad and me, I went to my room, from that time I was keeping on thinking about the events which happened today, there was one and only incident which brought smile to my face that was my baby sister's engagement with my best friend, Ranbir. Nevertheless, she is not happy now and I am the reason behind that. She might hate me now. My baby sister will hate her Bhai from now.
My eyes fell in the plate, which was kept in the side table of my bed. I was not feeling like having it. Therefore, I neglected my dinner. In addition, went to sleep with a hope that everything will fine soon. Moreover, I will make them believe whatever I did was not wrong it was the only right thing, which I ever did.
[End of his pov]
************************************
It was almost 12 am; Anant woke up from his sleep. He couldn't sleep, somewhere his heart is aching for someone but he is not aware of that or maybe he is not giving any second thought to that, or he is not ready to accept that his heart too can ache for someone. However, he knows someone close to him is in danger. But who? He does not know. He badly wants to help that person just because he wants freedom from these feelings. He hates feelings. He always stayed away from feelings, because feelings only hurt him.
After sometimes He went to his window and opened it, it was raining too badly, God pouring his anger to someone or its sympathy for anyone. Alternatively, he is too crying for a soul, who just left behind alone in life, someone just threw her out of life, her happiness, and her dreams. Now there is no value for her. She was a trash, which was only for use and throw. That was her destiny or fate. She is alone now. Her dreams are shattered in to small pieces it is even becoming difficult to find those shattered pieces.
For finding solace to his aching heart, he thought to sleep but he knew he would not be able to sleep until he makes it sure that she is fine and safe. However, he is not at all ready to accept it. Then he went to sleep.
***************************************
In somewhere near the city one shattered soul was walking in the road in full darkness only those raindrop are accompanying her, she did not even notice it is raining too badly. Her attire shows that she is from a good environment, but she is shattered or someone broke her in to this condition.
Tanhaai.. Tanhaai...
Dil ke rasste mein kaisi thokar maine khaayi
Toote khwaab saare ek maayusi hai chhaayi
Har khushi so gayi, zindagi kho gayi
Tumko jo pyaar kiya maine to sazaa main paayi
Tanhaai...Tanhaai..milo hai pahali hui tanhaai
Tanhaai...Tanhaai..milo hai pahali hui tanhaai
Khwaab mein dekha tha ek aanchal
Maine apne haathon mein
Ab toote sapnon ke shishe
Chubte hai in aankhon mein...
She is crying but her tears mixed with the rain. Her eyes were pure red it is not of anger it is because of continuous crying, she is crying from past many hours, tears were not stopping. Her kohl was smudged. It was dark around both her eyes. That sight can kill any person who have a heart but why did he not see those pure eyes that love filled heart. He was blind there, or some misunderstanding closed his eyesight.
She is continuously walking lifelessly without caring about the rain, and the lightening, inside her its breaking that pain is not allowing her to think about anything else. She is not caring about anything else, the inside pain killing her, that making her strong. She was a pure soul someone tore her apart, used and threw out of life like a waste. What was her mistake? Love? She just loved someone dearly, deeply and madly.
Khwaab mein dekha tha ek aanchal
Maine apne haathon mein
Ab toote sapnon ke shishe
Chubte hai in aankhon mein...
Kal koi tha yahin ab koi bhi nahin
Banke naagin jaise hai saanson mein laheraayi
Tanhaai..tanhaai. palkon pe kitne aansu hai laayi
Tanhaai..tanhaai. palkon pe kitne aansu hai laayi
Kyoon aisi ummed ki maine
Jo aise naakaam hui
Door banaai thi manzil
To raste mein hi sham hui
Ahhhaaa
At last, she could not bear it anymore. She screamed, she shouted, she cried for solace, she want him to soothe her but where is he? She does not know. He left her. Nevertheless, her heart was still aching for him. She wants him to hide her from this world. However, she could not find him near her. She was left alone in life once again. Once it was her parents now her love, that person whom she loved dearly, deeply and madly. Now she is nothing him. But, she was never anything to him.
Kyoon aisi umeed ki maine
Jo aise naakaam hui
Door banaai thi manzil
To raste mein hi sham hui
Ab kahan jaaoon main kisko samjhaaoon main
Kya maine chaaha tha aur kyoon kismet mein aayi
Tanhaai, tanhaai.. jaise andhero ki ho gehraayi
Dil ke rasste mein kaisi thokar maine khaayi
Toote khwaab saare ek maayusi hai chhaayi
Har khushi so gayi, zindagi kho gayi
Tumko jo pyaar kiya maine to sazaa main paayi
Tanhaai...Tanhaai..milo hai pahali hui tanhaai
Tanhaai...Tanhaai..milo hai pahali hui tanhaai
Tanhaai...Tanhaai Tanhaai...Tanhaai
"WHY GOD? WHY? WHY ME?
WHY IS THIS FATE FOR ME? WHAT WAS MY MISTAKE? WHY DO I NOT DESERVE LOVE? WHY AM I ALWAYS LEFT ALONE IN LIFE? WHY IS EVERYONE USING ME? TELL ME PLZ"
She was shouting looking towards the sky, she is asking to god why did this happen with her. However, nothing came, or no one replied to her queries. She was continuously shouting looking towards sky. She is angry now. She hates herself now for trusting him. For letting, he breaks her. For letting, he uses her.
"I hate myself now, just because I loved him he used me, he used me for his own selfish needs. However, I was living with a hope that he will accept me but that never happened. My dreams are shattered now.
My only mistake was to love, and I will never do that mistake again."
That was a voice from a strong person not from a shattered or a broken one. Her mistake taught her love is the most hurtful thing in the world.
We can hope someone will come and change her, will make her realize that love is not only a hurtful thing; it is something, which can wipe that hurt and the pain. The most beautiful feeling.
After wiping her tear sickened face, she stood up from there. In addition, she walked towards her new destination with new hopes and dreams. Now she is not the same who used to be, new, this new strong woman would never let anyone to hurt her nor for use her.
***************************************
In Anant's home:
Ritz was knocking her dad's door, he opened after some time. Moreover, he let Ritz to come inside to the room.
"Dad, you didn't have your dinner," Ritz said in a mere voice. She is still wearing that engagement dress.
"Ritz, u still didn't change" dad enquired.
I will before going to sleep."
"Ok, did Anant have his dinner?"
"Don't know, I didn't check"
"Hmm"
"But dad you were so angry with him but still u sends me there with his dinner, Why?
"Even if he did something wrong he is my son, how can I not care for him?" and it is same for you too. But it is not means that you can do something wrong like your Bhai did," he said with a small smile.
"No dad, I will never disappoint you" Ritz replied and hugged her dear dad. Both were trying to soothe their aching heart. Those were aching for their loved ones. One for his son and daughter in law, and other for her Bhai and Babhi...
************************************
The same girl, who drenched in rain reached in front of a big gate. She opened it, and entered to that building as she belongs there; as she knows here, no one will throw her out of life. Her dress was fully drenched but there is neither pain nor hurt in those eyes. It was full determination to show the world that she is not a trash that anyone could use. Now she will show who she is, and what she can do.
She moved inside to the building. However, the door was closed so she sits in the ground at one corner. And, kept her head in her knees. She sat there with the same thoughts.
What was her fault? To love or to expect, to be loved?
There was a name board and some words written there. It was read as "angel's heaven.."
END
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