This part is supposed to be the last note of the crescendo that was building up. I don't know if I've done justice to it, but I still want to dedicate this part to Shivangi (_UptoNoGood_) and Jhanvi Di (Jhanvi.123). Shivi was one of the reasons I thought I should try writing and Jhanvi Di herself knows what a big help she was to me yesterday. To the temporary goodbyes and amazing friendships!
PART 19 :
He meant to be a little sarcastic with his words, mocking her, like someone seething with anger would.
But no, the sophisticated prince that he was, he could never make mockery of someone, especially when they were vulnerable. How Un-Rajputish would that be!
Instead he just sounded kind. But that didn't mean he was out of his senses like the night before. Logic had kicked in and brought annoyance with it.
Unknowing to all this, Nisha held on to the tone in his voice and forced herself into believing all would be well soon. Following Viraj when he began walking towards the small patch of lawn behind the building, Nisha tried to arrange her thoughts into a sequence that sounded coherent as well as believable. Nisha walked behind Viraj as he led her to the bench on the side. She braced her self as he sat down, motioning to her to repeat the action.
She shook her head and balled her fists, nervousness shadowing all her senses. Sitting down wasn't a good idea in such a case. She had already begun hyperventilating. A look from Viraj brought her back to the present and she began, "I am sorry Sir. Even if I had legitimate reason for doing so, I still lied to you. That itself is my biggest crime."
Viraj snorted mirthlessly. How true. This was one thing I would have definitely said after she finished her monologue.
Not reacting to his interruption, Nisha continued. "The day I had entered your house, to get the appointment letter signed, I stumbled upon a chest. There were many unsent postcards there, all addressed to someone called "Ma". Shamsinghji had told me on the very first time that your father had died but when I asked him your mother, he wouldn't answer."
Bless the man... , thought Viraj.
"I didn't know what the letter was about and when I scrambled to keep it back, I read a part of it. Here, I apologise again, I should have kept my curiosity in check. But after that, you came in and I hurriedly kept the letter in my bag, not realising that I'd taken something of yours."
Viraj saw her eyes shine with purity and innocence. Or maybe the glint was sunlight that reflected off her eyes. Whatever it was, it made Viraj believe in her. This was stupid...but then, she is very childish. Her words do not reek of greed and ulterior motives. She doesn't look like she wants something out of this. Viraj nodded.
Taking that as her cue, she went on, "When I came back home, I saw the letter in my bag. I read it properly and felt very sad. Not for you. Oh no, don't even for a moment think that I felt sympathy or pity for you. You are strong enough to catch the lemons that life throws at you. What I felt sad that I couldn't be friend good enough. You needed someone to confide in, to be comfortable around. You called me a friend but I could not stand up to the title."
Viraj had felt indignation at first, when he thought he was receiving sympathy. But when she decided to turn the tale to her heroic - syndrome, Viraj was flabbergasted. She definitely wanted to be the hero (not the dramatic heroine. Always the hero), that he had seen before. She was too helpful. Solve everyone's problems, help everyone seemed to be her mantra. In the process she did forget many times that people needed to learn to solve their own problems. That they have the capability to solve them. All this good for an observation, but to be on the receiving end of her help, especially the one that had gone bad was tough.
These thoughts struck just as suddenly and as powerfully as a bolt of lightening. Just like a bolt of lightening, they illuminated the scenario briefly. And then they faded away.
Before he lost this thread of thought, he stopped her. "Tell me Ms. Nisha, what made you think I needed help? What made you think you could help? Again, I appreciate the effort. It is commendable that you thought of me so much. But didn't you think that I could handle my aloofness on my own?"
Nisha had her reply ready. "Sir, I had been watching you for almost a month when I decided to take up a new identity - email wali female. When I had read the card that you wrote to your mother, I was touched. But it was later that I decided that I ought to help you. I felt pained to see you alone and I had tried to entertain you as Nisha. But you made a perception. A perception that I was a good natured but immature person. That I could be friend but at a distance. You wouldn't let me come close. Never to the extent that you shared your thoughts with me. In fact, I hadn't seen you be comfortable with anyone. Not even Shekhar! Though I'm glad about it now..." she trailed off.
"Sir, I just wanted to do my bit, hoping that I would help you. That I could be your much needed went out. That I could bring back the Viraj Singh Rathor that was lost. In retrospection, I should have thought whether you needed my help or not. But I'm Nisha, Sir. Impulsiveness is second nature to me." She grinned while saying that. Viraj was surprised. To know your faults and talk about them was either cavalier attitude or high self confidence. What is Ms. Nisha exhibiting?
"I have of course paid a lot for that. And I will try to change it some day. But for now, I only want to explain that I wanted to help. Whether you wanted it or not, whether you'd take it or not. So I did. Plus, I'd confirmed that a few lies for your benefit wouldn't hurt anyone. And you took the help that was offered to you, which of course meant you needed it. When you slowly started coming closer to Aarti, as you named me, I began to hear the warning bells. I wanted to tell you everything before anything went wrong. But when I had decided to, my parents found out."
Edited by Aditi_28 - 9 years ago
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