And now we come to Part 3! Thank you so much for all your support so far. I'd first like to thank the wonderful and multi-talented -mina- for helping me with the more "adult" scenes and formatting. And secondly, I'd like to mention that part of this chapter was inspired by a scene in Courtney Milan's novella Unlocked which I highly recommend you read.
"What - what do you mean?" She backed away in
surprise. He too looked a little baffled for a second. Clearly, no matter what
else had changed, his habit of putting his words before his thoughts hadn't. He
regained composure quickly though.
"I mean exactly what I
said. You want me vulnerable, I want to make it up to you. Come up to my room
and I'll show you."
"Come up to your room? I
am not your supermodel girlfriend Abhishek - "
"EX - girlfriend."
"I'm not stupid. Given your family talent for
making incriminating videos, what's to say you won't have a camera inside,
ready to humiliate the behenji who is so desperate she will go up to her
ex-husband's hotel room for a quick romp?"
He jerked back as if slapped. She regretted the
accusatory words as soon as they left her mouth. Yes, he had never trusted her,
but he had also never given her a reason not to trust him. Yes, he had married
her for deceitful purposes but had revealed the truth to her the next day
itself.
He had a habit of blurting out truths to her,
whether be it the truth of their marriage or the fact that Tanu had proposed to
him. He had never let her down during the elaborate charade for her mother's
health. For better or for worse, he was an open book. That's what had made her
start to fall in love with him, wasn't it?
Abhishek Prem Mehra was many things, but
underhanded was not one of them. She saw that although she had just insulted
him, he met her gaze steadily, fearlessly.
"Okay."
"What?"
"Come up to my room -
only to talk. And only because I want closure."
"Thank you."
Closure. Such a final
word. Such a deceptive word. had come over her? She didn't even have a plan and
yet here she was, heading straight towards her room.
It was strangely
intimate to have him in the room with her, in what was technically her space. Although
he looked awkward and ill at ease, his body seemed to take over the entire
room. Still, she liked that for once she was more familiar with their
environment than he was. "Sit." She indicated the little wooden chair. No way
was she going to let him go near her bed!
"Why are you here
Abhishek?" She sighed, "You've apologised many times, don't apologise again. But
what do you want from this?" She waved a hand to indicate both of them, perched
stiffly in their respective positions.
"I came here because I
selfishly wanted to beg your forgiveness again and because I wanted to make
amends. Guess that was one part of my rock star ego still remaining in me...I
hoped that I might be able to make things up to you," he sighed bitterly. "But...I
have learnt recently what self-loathing is..."
He had an anguished look
on his face and she had to sit on her hands to stop them from smoothing out his
frown. "I can never forgive myself for acting in a manner that made me feel
that way. And if I can't forgive even myself for that, how can I even ask you
to forgive me for making you hate yourself?"
He stood up again, "forgive
me for wasting your time, and congratulations on getting selected as a
delegate." He gave her small, sad, smile before turning to leave.
She had never seen the
massive rock star so hunched over, so defeated, and she couldn't help herself.
"Wait." He stopped in his tracks. "You never did tell me exactly what you meant
when you said you wanted to be vulnerable to me." Her darned curiosity was
piqued.
"It was a silly,
childish idea. Two of the biggest problems in our marriage were that I never
trusted you," he had the decency to look ashamed at this, "and that...I always had
more power than you did."
When did he become so self-aware? "I thought that if I
made myself vulnerable to you, then we would deal with both of those problems.
You could have power over me, and I could show that I trusted you." His words
sent a warm feeling washing through her body. How many times she had begged the
universe that her husband would trust her, and here he was, offering himself up
to her.
"And how exactly did you
plan to make yourself vulnerable to me?"
"I hadn't really thought
of that, he chuckled. "I don't know - you could call a press conference right
now and say whatever you want as Mrs. Abhishek Mehra. I will arrange it so that
all the journalists come. Or you could take the keys to my recording studio. Or
you could take naked photos of me and keep it on your phone," he grinned.
Naked. Her eyes widened at his
last suggestion. Now why did that sound so much more appealing than it should? To
her dismay, a crazy idea was already forming in her mind.
"Stand next to the bed."
He obeyed without question. She retrieved a teal dupatta from her handbag. Oh!
He actually remembered this one; it had been his favourite outfit. Pragya
twisted the long garment in her hands, as if testing its strength. Slowly, she approached him and lifted
his right hand. Before he could process the tingling he felt from her touch,
she had securely tied his hand to the bedpost. Abhi groaned. She was supposed
to punish him, not do what he'd been dreaming about for months!
She stepped back to
check her handiwork. She had to admit; it did give her a little thrill to see
her strong husband tied to the bedpost. "So what do you think I'm going to do
now?"
"Tie me up," he managed
to choke out.
"If you knew, why didn't
you stop me?" She said in surprise.
"Trust."
Pragya looked shocked at
his answer. Sadly, he seemed to have lost her trust as soon as she had gained
his. She stood there for a minute, looking him up and down, and a slow burn
coursed through his body. He hoped she wouldn't look down again. Even his
innocent Pragya would understand exactly what sort of punishment she was giving
him.
"Well, are you going to
just stand there staring at me or are you going to finish what you started?" he
challenged.
"Shh..." she raised a
slender finger to his lips. "Or I'll have to find some way to put your mouth
out of commission too."
He had to bite his lip
to stop himself from moaning. Was she really that innocent, or just that cruel?
Either way, it wasn't helping his situation
one bit.
But his dear wife seemed
unconcerned with his troubles and was scanning the room. Oh dear, it didn't
seem like she'd thought this plan through - there didn't seem to be anything
left to tie up his other arm.
Undeterred, she
determinedly walked back to her suitcase and pulled a red and gold dupatta from
the very bottom. The gatbandhan dupatta! She
had pulled out the garment that had literally tied them together for the first
time. Had she carried it with her all these months?
Little waves of hope nudged
the embankment around his heart. Could
she possibly still have feelings for me?
Pragya seemed oblivious
to his turmoil, however, as she started to tie up his other hand.
It was so ironic that even though he was being
tied to a lamp bracket with his own nuptial knot, he felt freer than he had in
months. As she tightened the knot around his wrist, the knot in his heart
loosened with hope.
Unfortunately, she
wasn't having very much success with this hand, and had to climb on a chair to
reach the bracket. Even more unfortunately, this position put him very, very
close to her.
He had a wonderful view
of the shadows underneath her blouse. Just one little exhale and he could plant
his nose right on the little dip in her collarbone. If he moved his head just
an inch his lips would land on her chest. Stay
still, stay still.
Pragya fumbled with
knot. He was so, so close to her. If she sighed, his lips would graze her
scorched skin. If she bent her head just a couple of degrees his hair would
graze her chin. Let your head fall, it'll
be worth it.
No. Nothing was worth bending her head for. The memory of what had
happened last time she'd let her hormones act around him pierced her mind. Never again. She had to increase the
distance between them. His heavy-lidded gaze was drawing her in and she dropped
her eyes, only to fall on something far more
unsettling.
"Enjoying this a little
too much are we?" She mocked. Gulp. An Adam's Apple moving up and down. She
wanted to place her lips on it. Focus.
"No," he croaked. "It's
just been a very long time." Wrong answer.
"Of course. Of course
you wouldn't voluntarily be attracted
to poor little Chashmish. But your body wants it. And maybe I'll give it what
it needs. Everybody already thinks I'm damaged goods. Might as well get
something out of the bargain. Anyway behenjis like me wouldn't get kissed any
other way." She leaned into him.
"No. I don't deserve to be your first kiss. You should share your
first kiss with someone who makes your heart fly, who makes you feel free, who
makes your world colourful."
If you say so.
She kissed him.
A/N: Thank you so much for reading. Please leave your comments and (especially) criticisms - they really help me grow as a writer. All feedback is really meaningful and much appreciated.
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