An SS on Ruhi's POV *Completed* - Page 4

"Why are you doing this to me Ruhi?" her father thought.

"Moreover, why are you doing this to us?"

"Why am I doing this to them, what am I getting from this?" she thought.

"No, it's all for the better good, you can't do anything now Ru, just go with the flow and one day you might adjust." she said to her conscious calming it.

She started to stay away from her brother, even though he was supposed to be the only one who could give her company, she started to purposely stay away from him. A sort of hatred was built up by her, for him. He also tried to stay away from her, knowing that she was angry at him, for some reason; trying to change her mind would just give her more reasons to hate him. So he laid back and tried his best to stay away from her and her temper.

The father- daughter meetings through phone calls were apparently the only time in both their day-to-day lives where they could get a break from the mess they had made in their lives. She immediately opened up with their first phone conversation. Saturday was already a delightful day, but now it had a completely different type of joy. They didn't talk on any other day because they were both really busy with work given to them and her old mother's phone was really difficult to access. The night before would be sleepless, just the thought of living like old times, the excitement would be hard to contain. She would sometimes steal her mother's phone in the middle of the night and would call her father using up the phone battery after already talking breathlessly for the entire day, she had to stealthily steal the object because she knew that her mother was irritated by the duo, but she would never admit it and Ruhi would also never want to create a new havoc in the house so she stayed quiet. The talks would be endless, usual talks about daily life were suddenly given a tinge of laughter, they would laugh at the most random subjects, still the laughter of one would always give happiness to the other. Only her father was given the visiting rights, considering Ruhi chose her old mother over her Ishima. This thought of his daughter not accepting his wife as her mother was just a sword to the heart. "She considered Ishita her mother for all these years, what made her change her mind now?" he thought as his chatterbox of a daughter was ranting over the work load given in school.

School started to bring a different meaning of itself in front of her. She started paying more attention in school, mostly because she didn't have a life of her own to look after. History came out to be her favourite subject, because nothing was better than jumping out of your story only to fall back into another one. This was a subject in which she would forget about her pain only to grief the one's of those a hundred years ago.

They had never gotten a chance to meet due to her father being out of town and herself having some assessments. Due to their separation, both of them did their job with utmost insincerity, the feeling of having to do something which you didn't like before that one thing that could give you rest was difficult.

This Saturday was the first, in which they were going to meet, she walked her own merry way towards the local park where they agreed to meet. Her mother didn't come to drop her, Ruhi knew that the clash of her parents would just cause another long forgotten fight to bubble up. So she chose the easy path, she went herself.

She waited in the open grounds sitting on the cool grass staring at the entry gate of the park in search of her father, she spotted him from the far distance, as they neared he reached out for a hug, she tried to blink away the tears but by that time, he could feel the sogginess of his black tee. 

Her cries could be heard by the people walking by, but right then none of his concentration was on those strangers, it was on her. He looked at her in confusion, at first he thought that she was just playing a joke, but that thought was also made in a second and he knew she would never use such an inappropriate way to greet another person.

"What happened?"

"What do you mean what happened? I've been living in hell since forever and you're asking what happened?"

"What do you mean you were living in hell, you yourself made that decision."

The words she said seconds ago repeated in her mind, yes she said many things in the past that were supposed to be secret, but this, this was the time when she most regretted her ability to not have control over her mouth. So, she lied, obviously.

"That, I was not talking about hell, I was talking about the hell you've made of my life, seriously you can't find any time for your daughter?" she said jokingly.

"Ruhi please, tell me what is bothering you, I'm your father. Tell me what is wrong and then I'll help you get through it."

She found the truth in his words; she realised that he said them in complete calmness, indicating to her that she could take her own time in saying so.

"You really won't say anything about it? You don't have to tell anyone for sure, but you have to promise also to not scold me, okay?" He nodded his head indicating a yes'.

 "And you have to promise not to tell anyone in the house, not even Ishima, okay? Ruhi promise."

"Okay."

He lifted himself up from the grass facing her, eager to know the reason behind her behaviour.

"Okay, the night when Adi was in the hospital, when everybody started to leave I went inside his room to say one last goodbye, but I also had a doubt in his behaviour. He couldn't have been that stupid to not know the dosage of sleeping pills. And then he cleared my doubt, he admitted that he tried to commit suicide. I was furious, obviously and fumed in anger as to why would he do that, but in my head I knew exactly the reason behind this action. And I know you do to. The thing I feared him to do was finally done, he threatened me to kill himself if I didn't agree to give the custody to Shagun mamma. And I had to, I mean come on his life was at stake, and he's my brother! I couldn't ignore his threats, if he told me he was going to do it, he would have definitely done it."

She looked at him in the search for his reactions, he showed an expression of nothing at first, after a few seconds he came back to the real world and he found himself in a tight situation, one side was his daughter who gave up her happiness for his son, and the other side was his son giving away his life just for selfish reasons, but he knew that his son was thinking he did right. He knew what was this sister-brother bonding, both would give up whatever it might be for the other, but would be unaware of the feelings of their family that were being hurt. Even if they did know what they were doing to the family members, they would turn blind to it; neither of them would understand what were the others going through because according to them they themselves were the saddest people on earth. But still they didn't deserve such a life.

He didn't regret making that promise, the thought of this same scenario was lingering in his mind from the day his son was in the hospital. But he got his mind off the foolish things that his son did and now the only thing he would have to do is bring his son on the right side. "But how?" he said to his mind. His daughter too was as blank as he was, her brother was very loyal towards whom he loves, but sometimes that loyalty could take him to the wrong side of town. Later they got their mind off these things and continued to chit-chat, forgetting about the deep thoughts they were in seconds ago.

They had to bid farewell at the time striking five, they were only given two hours in a week to catch up with each other's lives, talk, laugh, and cry, not real tears and not even in unhappiness, in delight actually that the one in front of me has not become extinct in my life, I can still see you, talk to you and feel your presence in front of me, near me.' Everything had to be done in these two hours, at first they would feel that it was just twenty minutes that passed by, while they were lost in their talks. But later, they started to adjust, used their time carefully, went to places they had never visited, it was the life.

A month went by like this, Ruhi and her father were happy in the little time they spent with each other, the family started to calm down and agreed that indeed Shravan didn't know about the inside story of the case. But someone was still present in the crowd who was still standing on the quicksand and continued to drown, never trying to escape, accepted defeat, Ishita. Her mother was just as much attached to her daughter as her husband was; she felt a feeling of rejection from her daughter. She never knew the reason why her Ruhi never agreed to meet her, but she herself also never asked her if they could meet. She knew that there was an inbuilt thought process in her daughter which would just trigger the alarm that right now, through this moment she needed her Ishima, her support, her guard. But she stepped back, waiting for her Ru to call.

The same situation was for her Ru also, she wanted her mother's presence so badly. But she couldn't do so, not with Shagun watching over her for almost every second, it was basically a competition in between the two mothers.

 Usually her father would bring Ruhi food made by her mother, she would have quick flashbacks of how her mother would struggle to cook edible Punjabi food, and yet the final result in the end was everyone licking every morsel off their fingers.  Oh how she wanted to see her mother in front of her, but she feared to even phone call her because her Ishima would sense that there was something wrong just by the sound of her voice, and then she would just not stop digging to find the thing that was troubling her beloved daughter.