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THE COLLAGE THAT IS F.I.T.E
: BEGINNER'S GUIDE :
what happens in FITE ?
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DISCLAIMER :
IT'S OFFICIAL NOW .
I AM INSANE .
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PART ONE : THE ULTIMATE VIDARTH FICTION .
THIS IS HOW WE DO IT
: Guidelines to write a VIDARTH fic !
(this is meant to use as an example you may as well add your creativity to it !)
PARTH KASHYAP buried his face in his pillow ! trying with all his might to push the thoughts of a certain vampy girl out of his mind .He tried thinking bout' tichi ... about the crack in his wall .. if egg came before chicken or vice-versa ; if cats were really that smart ; his undying love for Randhir si----- Oh sorry ,that's another clich ship . Well the point is , no matter what he thought , his mind would always be pulled back to a certain vampy girl !
Parth had known that he was in love with Vidushi Kumar for a good thirty seconds . Actually Parth didn't even have any romantic feelings for her before this story started ! because before this had been started he was in character ! but now that a certain crazy fan fiction author got hold of him , making him madly in love with Vidushi kumar . plain and simple like that ! got it ? good .
Now he was laying in his bed , trying to not think about the one girl he was to hate with every fibre of his body , but now suddenly in love with her . But we all know this already .. so we might as well skip the 3 long para's where I repeat the same thing over and over again using poetic lines and strong emotions to keep you interested . Why not just get on with his long sappy speech which is usually so out of character it makes you want to gag !
"OH WHAT AM FEELING THIS WAY ?" ... he moaned in the pillow ! "SHE'S PURE EVILLL FOR GOD'S SAKE" ... "WHY CAN'T I STOP THINKING ABOUT THAT BEAUTIFUL ----- I MEAN i have strong feeling for --- I MEAN i have an undying lust for ---- i mean .. OH WHOM I AM KIDDING -------------- AM IN LOVE WITH ONE VIDUSHI KUMAR !"
PARTH could hear screams erupt from downstairs. 'Oops. Was I a bit too loud?' Well,he learned the answer to this question when he heard the sound of pounding footsteps making their way up the stairs, and the mumbles and growls of a very pissed off person. Parth braced himself for what was to come next... and what came next was very shocking indeed. When the door burst open, instead of a very pissed of Randhir Singh Shekhwat standing in the doorway that everyone expects, a very pissed off bear was standing there instead.
"Fa- what the...?" he hissed. "Why the bloody hell is there a bear... oh, nevermind." Not in the mood to deal with this crap, Parth reached behind his bed frame and pulled a handy dandy shotgun that he had just in case for situations like this. Now you're probably wondering why Parth had a handy dandy shotgun that he had just in case for situations like this behind his bed frame. Well, he has this because this is my story, and if I want him to have a handy dandy shotgun that he had just in case for situations like this, then dammit he's going to have a handy dandy shotgun that he had just in case for situations like this. Another plain and simple. No questions asked. Got it? Good.
He pointed the handy dandy shotgun that he had just in case for situations like this at the bear. The bear soon began to freak out, and franticly wave his arms around. Parth thought this was an odd behaviour for a bear, so decided to lower his handy dandy shotgun that he had just in case for situations like this. He then noticed something that he didn't quite notice before: it wasn't a real bear, but some guy in a bear costume. How he didn't notice this before really makes me question Parth's intelligence. I pictured him to be atleast... somewhat smart. But hell, Parth was in love with Vidushi Kumar. He was just a pocket full of mystery and out of character-ness.
Anyway, back to the story. Parth was now staring at the bear with creased eyebrows. 'Who could this strange fella be? There were so many possibilities. Mum? No. That doesn't sound right. Kabir? Now that's just odd. Kishor Agarwal? Wait, how do I know the name of sanyukta's Father ?'He continued to go over very unlikely people, making me go beyond questioning his intelligence, and wonder if the poor bloke was a crack head. Well, after several more unrealistic candidates later, the author decided to give the poor guy a break, and have the bear remove the head of the costume. So, it did. And PARTH gasped. But not just a small, under-your-breath gasp; a crazy, over the top, unneeded gasp that was so unlike him the author felt like crying, but didn't because she was not sensitive like that... what...?
Oh, sorry. I thought you were looking at me like that because of what I said, not because you wanted me to shut the hell up, and stop getting off-topic. Sorry. I'll try and cut back...
"Fa-SANYUKTA'S FATHER ?" Parth was stunned. Not only was he right for once in his life, but Sanyukta's father was standing in his doorway, wearing a bear costume. How he knew who Kishor agarwal was is a mystery to us all, but, like I said before, Parth Kashyap was a pocket full of them.
"what's gonna happen next ?"
TBC
Anupamaa
