Originally posted by: aparnauma
People put the responsibility entirely on her and then blame her afterwards.
She has been conditioned by her mother from childhood that she has to behave in a way that is pleasing to her sasra and her life depended on earning their affcetion.
Her mother had told her that her maika is not her home her parents are not her people and she belonged with her sasrewasle and this conditioning happened right from the time she was old enough to listen and understand spoken word.
Soon after her marriage when she entered her sasre wale DS may be a loving affectionate person but her methods of grooming Anandi as a bahu can never be defended.She was the one who drilled into her head that a woman's place should be at a lower level than her man's.She got scolded for doing better than Jagya during the short period she went to school.DS clipped her wings by making her burn her books and forcing her to discontinue her education and silencing her when ever she voiced an opinion.She was the one who drilled into her head that she should never interfere when elders talk.and the decisions should be left to elders.
Only after Jagya left her and ruined her life did DS change her behaviour towards her and allowed her to be more vocal about her opinions because she learnt that ANandi had been right and she was wrong.
Coming to her relationship with Jagya she was younger than him but more mature than him and he completely depended on her and her wisdom from that age and used to make decisions after consulting her.His parents did not do much to decrease the dependancy and instead they encouraged it.When he went to Mumbai he was so lost when he was on his own that he latched on to Gauri and his downfall started.By the time he realised that his downfall was due to lack of Anandi's wise counsel he went back and tried to grab her back from Shiv when he realised that he lost her forever he still looked upto her for advice and guidance and she couldn't ignore that.
That was the reason she black mailed into agreeing for a marriage because then he would have acompanion and would stop looking at the past and look into future.But he wanted a partner of her choice because he had more faith in her judgement than his.
Then the Sanchi mess happened.Anandi was against the match but no one listened to her.
Singhs thought Sanchi is a good choice and also keeping in mind Anandi's welfare they agreed Jagya believed that Sanchi was Anandi's choice because of mis/noncommunication and Anandi believed that he has chosen Sanchi even after knowing her brattiness for the sake of the family and then proceeded to help Sanchi become an ideal partner for Jagya where she failed miserably it was no fault of her but it was Sanchi who cheated her and everybody.
Now she got to know that Sanchi has not changed and told why Jagya broke off the engagement they want her to go and talk with Singhs and convince them to give another chance.She herself cannot say no because she has not given up on Sanchi yet and still confused about Sanchi's motives.They put her in a position where she feels compelled to go and talk to Singhs.
This mission will fail bigtime when Jagya walks in with Ganga.Again she will be blamed for keeping quiet about growing bond between Jagya and Ganga.The fact that she raised this question with Jagya six months ago as well as tried to raise her doubts with her husband will conveniently be ignored and she will be criticised for this.
She felt Sanchi and Jagya were not suitable even when Ganga was not in picture and even today she feels the same whether Ganga or no Ganga but people will criticise her for not talking about jagya ganga when it is not her place to speak about them in the first place.
She will be criticised for what ever she does or say or did not do or did not say.
She is very vocal about raising her voice against social injustices because that is her basic nature and it is instictive .In front of the family it is Anandi who has been systematically suppressed from her childhood days who has been conditioned to keep quiet.So it will be difficult for her to find voice.She may be older and understands better but conditiong makes her hesitant to voice her opinions.
Ufff Yeh Love Hai Mushkil
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