Originally posted by: Elysia
I'd like to start with a quote by Gibran: "Your pain is the breaking of the shell that encloses your understanding."
Knowing how Dutta's mind processes betrayal/shocking revelations or simply things that he does not want to face, I'm not too worried about his current condition. Because this condition is one step in his usual processing procedure. Yes, I realize just how sterile that sounds. I actually think that the man is grieving. He understands the mechanics of relationships all too well by now to remain oblivious to the fact that people he trust might not be worthy of his trust. He's struggling with coming to terms with the bitter reality of this fact - still reeling from the loss and betrayal of Kala.
He understands that no matter how much you care for someone - it doesn't mean that the person will care for you in the same way, the same amount, or even care at all. Being Dutta, a man with a really long list of psychological issues (trust issues, abandonment issues, self-doubt issues, etc.), at some point it becomes too hard to trust, because betrayal might be just around the corner. When he finally does put his faith in someone and they turn out betrayers - it makes it that much more painful.
He put his faith in Seema, Supriya, Kala, Roops, Leela, Nana, and in the end - he was burned. There is a limit to how much a human being can stand in terms of anything that life throws at you. I believe, personally, that Dutta has coped with a lot and still managed to come out of it alive. He's a survivor, from his initiation into the underworld and till now.
In tonight's episode, I feel that we removed another layer of Dutta's mind. His inner conflict was as heartbreaking as ever (although the heart is a muscle and technically can't break - sorry, random). Despite his fury toward his father (for the questions that he deserted Dutta with), I continue to feel some kind of curiosity in Dutta. There's a strong part of him that wishes to search for the answers, but fears the answers that he might find - perhaps because it wouldn't just alter his perception of himself (maybe to the worst), but also alter his relationship to his family members.
I realize that it's in Dutta's nature to become furiously emotional, but I'm starting to wonder when he will learn to handle life in another way? Jagtap Dada told him that life is full of betrayal and that one can't continue, throughout life, to react to those betrayals the way that Dutta does. Getting angry at himself, life, blaming people, hating himself, running away, drinking on top of his jeep, coming home drunk to his worried wife, wake up wasted, and remain depressed until something good happens.
Life is full of problems and betrayal and people who will gut you in your sleep - but then what do you do? 1) Live your life distrusting every single human that crosses your path, paranoid, angry, and enclosed in your shell of fear? 2) Trust people so much that when they turn out liars, you fall short and shut out the world, digging your own grave, lying in it, only to come back up for air when you regain your wits.
Are those really the only options?
I refuse to believe that. Emotional distress often leaves us in a heap of depression. In Dutta's case, it's extreme as he's really emotional - perhaps because when he cares for someone, he gives them everything he has and more yet. When they turn out liars, it destroys him. But perhaps it's time that Dutta, in his development toward maturing and learning to live life as it is (which is painful), learns to deal with his emotional storms in a way that doesn't shut him down, but makes him consider solutions?
I know a lot of people love Dutta as he is - emotional and angry - but he can still be those things, at the same time. Having seen Dutta's reaction to the revelations on Nana and Damodar post-Kala, I was a bit disappointed in him. He had come far, too far to fall back now. His reaction was extreme - understanding that Baji and Naku's lies hurt him - and knowing the blow Kala's revelation had to his system and how controlled he managed to be, I had hoped for a bit more control here as well.
I feel that he has connected with Naku on a level too deep react so aggressively at anything that she says. Taking all things into consideration (Baji-Naku lying to him, going behind his back, the revelations on his father and Nana, etc.), it's understandable that he gets emotional and angry, but again his reaction was way too extreme for me considering the development he's been through during the JMM2 track and through the DK-confrontation.
I had expected better from Dutta.
Moving on to Baji-Roops. I've no idea where their story is headed (but I have a wild guess). There is one thing that bothers me though. I still can't feel the chemistry between them. Sometimes they seem like total strangers to me, two strangers having an awkward conversation.
Dutta coming home drunk and stumbling toward Madhu for a heart-to-heart talk? Wow. I'm really, really, really excited about reading tomorrow's episode now. I've waited way too long for this scene. LOL. I love the connection between them and the way Dutta points it out. There's an understanding there that I love to explore through their dialogues. Looking forward to it. Madhu is a beautiful character that could become so multidimensional and alive with a little more attention. She already grows through her conversations with Dutta.
AS, as usual, starts blaming and distrusting Naku. Pendulum Mama -_- The weather is more stabile than her.
I'm loving where this story is headed. There's so much to explore. Dutta's inner struggle is a joy to witness and things will really tense up as he'll acknowledge Nana's true nature (which he will) and the battle that goes on from there.
I wonder where Kala is... oh wait, that's right. She's in South Africa. She needed the vacation after that break-up with her brother. Maybe when she comes back, she'll be ready to battle him for that satta.
Brilliant episode. Had me annoyed with Dutta, sympathizing Dutta, mentally yelling at Dutta, and comforting Dutta all in one go.
Nothing but LTL and Mishal's (now imaginary) performance can do that to a girl π
EDIT: One last thing. Dutta's dialogues on that jeep were FRIGGING AWESOME. I could literally hear Mishal's voice saying the words in that unique Dutta-angry-slash-bewildered way of his.
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