Check out the latest from the Jhan-Diya factory!! Presenting Diwali the Love ne way!!! This post was inspired by Nids description of a typical BT diwali, so thanks girl!!
Scene 1
The Diwali puja
Damini Dear God! Thank you for giving me Prithvi - though he IS a moron and has appalling relatives... Thank you for knocking some sense into Sameer and for giving me the power to decipher Varun's expressions... Now please just make these 'gharelu' types disappear from my house so that I can go horse-riding with Prithvi in peace...
I haven't even been able to fall into Prithvi's arms, cos his nosy Mausi keeps lurking around the corners...
*notices Tunna staring at her*
Please god, give me the patience to keep from blowing that man's brains out...
*Tunna smirks at her*
Scratch that request God, just help me get out of the murder charges later. Where's my gun...
Avni Bhagwanji hum sab ki raksha karna. Please in donon mehamaanon ko jaldh se jaldh apne paas bulaa lo.
Rosh Twinkle twinkle oh my god
How I wonder where you are
Up above the world so high
Like a diamond in the sky
Today we all come together to pray
Take these awful pests away.
Prithvi Darasal, bhagwan, main Damini se bahut pyaar karta hoon, par woh mujhe ghaas bhi nahin dal rahi hai... Toofi ke ghaas ke saath main aur adjust nahin kar sakta... Please mere baddimag biwi mein thodi akal thoosiye...
*Notices tunna staring at Damini and drooling, and goes crazy*
Ab mujhe iss tunna ko bhi limits sikhana padega... Sameer kam tha kya, ki yeh bhi pahunch gaya *glowers at him nastily*
Iss tunna ko sabak sikhana hiii hogaaa...
Sameer God this new tunna character is also an MK. He is serious competition to my MK giri. Please god make me the only MK here. Is kaante ko mere raasthe se hataa do.
Varun God there are 8 people here today (technically there are 9 but more on that later)' 6 people we know and 2 we don't- but you know all of us. Please bless the 3 couples so that we may all be happy with each other. Please bless us so that the 3 sisters may always be happy be together and the 3 brothers should always be united. Rosh and Avni bhabhi consider Prithvi Bhaiyya their brother ' may the relationship between those 3 flourish. Please bless Avni bhabhi and Sameer bhaiyya's child. May those 3 be happy as a family. Finally god please take care of these 2 visitors so that they can leave early.
Mausi Kanha ji! Humre bacchon ne humse chupake inn mem ke saath saadi kar li.. Humri Suman behen ko toh chatth se ankhiyaan ladane se phursat nahin milti, toh ab inke jeevan ko sawaarne ka bhaar hum par hi toh hai! Humein aasirwaad dijiye ki hum inn mem ko aadars bahu ke lakshan sikha payein... Badi bahu ke pistol aur choti bahu ke khilonon se hume bacha lena... Paar laga dena prabhu! Aur manjhli bahu ke aansuon ko thaam ke rakhna, warna uss badh mein naiyya doob hi jayegi...
Tunna (in mumbaiyya slang, cos he thinks it's cool) Bole toh, meri saari bhabhiyaan ek se badhkar ek maal hain, par Damini bhabhi kuch zyaada hi kadak hai! Bhagwan bhidu, meri uss ke saath setting karva de na, main roz maa se sava rupaiyya chura ke tereko prasad chadhaoonga... Aur haan, Prithvi bhaiyya ko mere se door rakhna... *catches Prithvi glaring at him* Arre baap, iska lafda kya hai? Kisine isse mere naam ka supari toh nahin diya na? Lagta hai kuch der ke liye kalti hona padega...
Scene 2
At the dinner table
"Chalo bahu, khana laga do. Hume bahut bhook lagi hai..." Mausiji said. Damini and Roshni rolled their eyes and looked away. Avni glanced at her sisters' set faces, sighed and brought out the food.
"Yeh sab kya hai?" Mausi asked sceptically, as she saw the food. "Sphagetti with marinara sauce, garlic bread, pizza and lasagna", Damini said, a little smugly, cos she'd helped cook the food and hadn't burned anything.
"Satyanas!!Humre bacchon ko tum teenon yeh sab khilati ho? Tabhi main sochoon ki yeh itne kamzor kyun lagte hain... Inhe sirf ghar ka khaana, khoob malai-ghee ke saath khaane ki aadat hai..." Mausi began, not noticing the way Damini, Avni and Roshni were gnashing their teeth.
The slightly more perceptive boys jumped in to do some damage control before things got too out of hand. "Mausiji, aap chakh ke toh dekhiye, khaana bahut accha bana hai", Prithvi said with a placating smile. Sameer nodded his head in agreement, while Varun shoved the food into his mouth religiously, not daring to look up.
Now, that happened to be the worst thing to say, for Mausi began ranting "Hey bhagwan! Yehi din dekhna baaki tha. In teenon ne pata nahin kya jaadu kar diya humre lalla par... Teenon apne gharwaaliyon ke palle se bandhe hue hain!! Bechari Suman behena! Tumhare ladke toh haath se gaye..." Shaking her head, she delivered her ultimatum "Main toh iss khaane ka ek bhi nivaala nahin khaaoongi!"
Damini smirked and pushed the platter of fruit toward the lady. "Toh aap yeh fruits khaa lijiye! Waise bhi aap ke umar main healthy food khaana chahiye..." Rosh piped in "Haan aur aapki dieting bhi ho jayegi... You really need it too!"
Ignoring his mother's outraged squeak, Munna leaned over the food. "Damini bhabhi, iss mein se aapne kya banaya?" he asked with a leer that set Prithvi blood boiling...
"Lasagne", she replied sweetly, trying not to give into baser impulses and pound his face.
"Heh?" he said, clearly not understanding what she said...
Roshni rolled her eyes. "This" she said, and plonked the dish before him.
Munna peered at the dish curiously and dug his spoon right into the dish.. Damini winced as he slapped a piece onto his plate, before Avni could cut it and serve it.. "Yech!" she thought, completely disgusted.
Her disgust mounted as he peeled away the pasta and cheese, dissecting the lasagne... Rosh looked as if she'd just lost her appetite and Avni ran awy from the table, presumably to puke. Sameer snapped "Abey! Khaa usey, kyun chaan-been kar raha hai..." Munna grinned unabashedly and stuffed his mouth with lasagne. Suddenly his eyes bulged, mouth working furiously...
"Dekha!! Tabhi humne kaha ki aise khaane ko mat khao... Humra beta mar raha hai, doctor ko bulao!!!" Mausiji wailed...
Munna shook his head furiously, and pointed behind his mother. She turned to look... and nearly fainted.
A girl stood there, in the shortest, tightest, most golden dress she'd ever seen! She stared as Rosh leapt out of chair screaming "Goldie!" and hugged the new entrant tightly...
"Ab yeh phooljhadi kaun hai? Kaisi saheliya hain choti bahu ke! Ekdam nirlajj!!" she fumed, as Goldie came and sat down at the table...
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More to come!
Edited by diya86 - 14 years ago
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