From & To Sathish #5 - Page 68

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Avan, Aval Adhu 225

Ravi raised his hands from the table where it had been resting and now resting both his elbows on the table, interlaced his fingers and stared at it but with his eyes closed. It made him look like he was lost deep in prayer or contemplation.

Opening his eyes slowly, he filled them with Daksha who sat right opposite him and gave her a low-key smile with both his eyes and lips. All their eyes were full of him and needless to say, Daksha seeing his response to her question, remarked in a tone filled with low-key sarcasm.

' Ravi, you look amused by my question?'

' No. I am sorry but I am not amused but bemused by your question. Forgive me for correcting you but there is a huge difference between being amused and bemused.'

' Okay. Point noted and corrected. But, why do you feel the need to be bemused by a simple question?' and raising her right hand, ' and yes, I know the difference between amused and bemused. So, I repeat why do you feel confused and puzzled by my simple question which was about your disappointment?'

Ravi's eyes lost their bemused expression and returned to their original state. Inscrutable and a blank slate.

Daksha shook her head wearily and glanced at her husband, ' You are right my wise old hubby. Here sits our dear friend who is a highly intelligent and well-read man, a teacher by profession and yet all he has to offer in return is a bemused look to a simple question.'

Ravi lowered his hands, ' Ducks, your question is about the look of disappointment that flashed on my face and that too twice. Once for Gayatri and once for Partha. But, have you stopped and thought about your question and that it involves what I felt but chose not to express through words? The moment, a situation involves feelings and emotions, does that not mean it translates into a person's personal matter.'

His simple but direct answer seemed to have an obvious effect on Daksha but she shook her head several times indicating to him that his answer was not enough and that she was not going to be satisfied with it.

' I totally agree with you and so I will sustain your objection and I will rephrase the question or rather rephrase the whole matter.'

Partha clapped his hands loudly excitedly and looked at Gayatri and said, ' Sabash.Sariyana Potti.'

Ravi chuckled and said, ' Dei, idiot. You are not P.S.Veerappa and this is that classic Vanjikottai Valiban film and most certainly I am neither Padmini nor Vyjayanthimala Bali.'

Partha should have shut up but his bad time caressed his Gob and he blurted, ' Poda, maybe not you but don't forget, my wife too is seated at this table.'

Daksha glared at him and said, ' Ravi is right Partha for you can never be that villain Veerappa for he is far too intelligent for you. So, please, stop making a fool of yourself.'

Partha turned his face right and left and mimicked a person who had been slapped on their cheeks and motioned his fingers across his lips and said, ' zipped.'

Daksha's face softened and in a voice to match the softness and love that filled her face, she looked at Ravi, ' I will rephrase my question, master and ask it again and this time I am asking it of my friend.'

Ravi's face softened hearing her soft voice and he said, ' It is ironic what you ask of me for it is not a simple question and in fact is a very complicated one, to say the least.'

Gayatri looked at him sadly for she knew that Ravi's use of the word ironic was spot on for there was nothing simple about him or what he thought and said.

' The opposite of the word simple is complex, complicated, hard etc. But, none of them will do justice to him for he always seems to have some reason, purpose and undeniable logic behind what he says and what he does. This should be good for no matter what happens, I am going to learn something new about my man. This man who I have fallen in love with.'

All three pairs of eyes were on him watching his every movement and all of them were eager to hear what he had to say and how he was going to answer the question that had been posed to him.

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Avan, Aval Adhu 226

' My answer is a bit complicated ' Ravi said and looked at Daksha, ' the first part is for both you and Gayatri and the second part is for Partha, who started this whole chain of events.'

Flashing a tiny smile that could have been assumed by them to be sad, shy, wry or at worst a smirk even, Ravi began answering Daksha's questions.

' When she revealed all that she felt for me and so beautifully, I did feel disappointed ' and looking at Gayatri, ' I am sure that another man in my place would have reciprocated enthusiastically and would have probably jumped up and hugged you in joy. But, I guess, I am wired a bit differently.'

Taking Gayatri's hands in his, ' I felt disappointed with you for falling in love with this man who was broken and who might just carry that injury and handicap for the rest of his life. For in my heart I feel that you deserve a better man than one who lived, lives and who possibly might live on with a ghost and remain secretly haunted for the rest of his life.'

She caressed his cheek lovingly and whispered, ' It's all right baby. All of us have a past and all of us are broken in our own ways. Maybe most of us are born broken and imperfect and maybe that is God's intent and the purpose of it all. So that we can meet the one whose imperfection will make our own imperfections perfect and whole.'

Ravi smiled but it was clear to Daksha and Partha that something was troubling him. It was there in his eyes and it was there in the way he tensely held his shoulders and slightly cocked his neck to the right. It was a tic, a nervous cue that escaped Gayatri's eyes but did not escape his friend's eyes and who loved him dearly and considered him the apple of their eye.

It was more worry than curiosity that prompted Daksha to ask him boldly but in a friendly manner, ' Ravi, what has brought about this sudden change in your heart? What is it that you see in her that you have not seen in any other woman? Why Gayatri and why now?'

Scandalized, Gayatri looked at Daksha and said, ' Enough. Please, enough with these questions. These are highly sensitive and deeply personal questions and I don't think it is fair to ask them of him, even if you are all very close with each other. I am sorry, it is unfair to torment a person who is already tormented and suffers his own private hell.'

She turned her face away from Daksha and angrily blew air on the hair that constantly irritated her cheeks and Ravi froze and went still in shock and horror.

Gayatri did not see his reaction to her action but they did. Both his best friends did although only one was astute enough and she knew in her heart that the ghost, the spirit that dwelled in Ravi's heart would never go away. She had left him but he had not and he would never leave her memory behind.

' Correct, Gayatri. You are absolutely right in saying that it is unfair on my part to ask Ravi such questions ' Daksha said gently, ' but don't you think friends make for good and free psychiatrists For in the end do what I am doing at this moment. They ask questions, lots of questions and listen while you talk and talk and in the end make you find your own answers. By asking those questions that one is frightened to ask themselves, they take them to all corners of their minds, and memories and find the reasons for what is troubling their patients.'

She looked at Ravi with love and pride, ' Look at him, look at our master and stop and think as to why and what made him live the life of a monk until today.'

' Daksha, I know what you speak is right and it makes a lot of sense. I too am curious but some answers have to come forth on their own. Some answers will come without being asked and when the time is right and that time I am sorry is not right now.'

She irritatedly puffed at the hair that had fallen on her and Daksha saw Ravi react again in the same way. His look was one of shock and fascination.

Unable to keep her thoughts to herself, she pressed on with them maybe unconsciously realizing that this moment would never return.

' Ravi, here is Gayatri who have known for a week at the most and here she sits next to you fighting for you and standing up for you. Say something, please. If not for me at least for her.'

Ravi raised his head slowly and looked at Daksha and said, ' Deja vu ' and then they all heard a sad sob escape his soul along with tears from his eyes.

They all heard him say his confession loud and clear.

' Gayatri reminds me of her. She reminds me of the one who is gone but who stays close.'

Partha felt something break in him for he had never seen Ravi look so lost and helpless.

' That is why I looked disappointed. Disappointed that this beautiful woman, this brave soul has fallen for one who I fear might be handicapped forever. Broken forever. It is not fair. Not fair at all for she deserves more. So much more than ghosts and broken hearts.'

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Avan, Aval Adhu 227

“Not everything that is faced can be changed, but nothing can be changed until it is faced.”

' Ravi, maybe I do deserve more. But, what about you? Don't you deserve more and a better person than me? Answers to such questions are very difficult to get at and in the end, it is not what each and every one of us deserves or doesn't deserve. It is all about what we can do for each other and what happiness and peace we can bring to the other.'

Ravi did not say anything and remained silent with his head bent and eyes averted from all of them.

Gayatri reached out grasping his hand, ' So what, if I remind you of that lady? It does not bother me at all and it should not be bothering you either.'

Ravi slowly lifted his face which was filled with doubt and asked, ' It does not bother you? It will not bother you?'

' No. It does not bother me and will not bother me and will never be a problem between us. Of course, that does not mean we will never have problems, fights, or arguments in our life. What I am saying is that this ghost, this lost love that is in you will never be a problem. Promise.'

Taking his hand, she kissed it softly and looked at him with open eyes through which she wanted him to see her open mind and open heart that hid nothing and said, ' I feel proud, great that I remind you of your love' and seeing Ravi stare at her, ' You think I am weird, loony. I assure you I am not.'

Turning to Daksha and Partha, ' Guys, what do you think of this man here? I mean what is your opinion about him? Please be brutally honest.'

Without any hesitation, Partha shot off his answer, ' I love him and I will do anything for him and even willingly die for him.'

' Why, Partha? Why would you be ready to die for him and state that with your wife sitting next to you?'

Partha shrugging his shoulders, looked at Ravi, ' Because he is my friend. Whatever I am is because of him.'

Gayatri nodded and turned to Daksha, ' What about you, Ducks? What do you think of this man who sits amongst us?'

Daksha was a pragmatic person and not one given to dramatics and yet what she said was more or less similar to what Partha had declared.

' I think he is one of the kindest, gentlest and most honourable men that I have met in my life and believe me when I tell you that I know a lot about men and our human species. If it comes to that, I too will willingly lay my life down for him.'

Gayatri clapped her hands and said, ' Bravo. Bravo ' and looked at Ravi, ' If these good people, these friends of yours are willing to sacrifice themselves for you then that means something. That means something precious, and wonderful. I saw the same loyalty and love from all those people in your town and that includes children who hero worship you.'

Ravi was totally confused but as was his nature, remained silent and did not ask the questions that were swirling in his head and instead waited for the answers to answer themselves.

Gayatri answered it for him. ' If you, a person so loved and admired by everyone happen to fall in love with somebody then that somebody must indeed be special. As special as you or even more. So, if I remind you of that person it means that I am special too.'

Placing his hand on her breast, ' You have spent nearly 25 years living with her memory and now after all these years, you have placed that same love and faith in me. You have entrusted yourself to my safekeeping.'

' Ravi ' she said his name and when he looked right into her eyes, ' I feel honoured. I feel great that I remind you of your lady for she must have been special and if you have opened your heart to me, the same heart that you opened for her, then there is nothing to be disappointed about. My only fear is if I will be worthy of her and worthy of you.'

Ravi stood up and said in a choked voice, ' I am sorry. Please forgive me. Please forgive us.'

Daksha and Partha's face revealed their own confusion and shock hearing his words.

Then all that cleared up when they saw Ravi pull Gayatri by her hand and when she stood up, he gently hugged her and kissed her softly and said, ' I love you, Gayatri.'

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5RtTFP2TNcM

Just one more moment, that's all that's needed,

Like wounded soldiers in need of healing

Time to be honest, this time I'm pleading,

Please don't dwell on it, 'cause I didn't mean it

I can't believe I said I'd lay our love on the ground,

But it doesn't matter 'cause I made it up, forgive me now

Everyday I spend away, my soul's inside out,

Gotta be some way that I can make it up to you now, somehow

By now you know that I'd come for you

No one but you, yes, I'd come for you

But only if you told me to

And I'd fight for you

I'd lie, it's true

Give my life for you

You know I'd always come for you

I was blindfolded, but now I'm seeing,

My mind was closing, now I'm believing

I finally know just what it means to let someone in,

To see the side of me that no one does, or ever will

So if you're ever lost and find yourself all alone,

I'd search forever just to bring you home,

Here and now, this I vow

By now you know that I'd come for you

No one but you, yes, I'd come for you

But only if you told me to

And I'd fight for you

I'd lie, it's true

Give my life for you

You know I'd always come for you

You know I'd always come for you

No matter what gets in my way

As long as there's still life in me

No matter what, remember

You know I'd always come for you

Yes I'd come for you, no one but you,

Yes I'd come for you, but only if you told me to

And I'd fight for you,

I'd lie, it's true

Give my life for you,

You know I'd always come for you

No matter what gets in my way,

As long as there's still life in me

No matter what, remember, you know I'd always come for you

I'd crawl across this world for you,

Do anything you want me to

No matter what, remember, you know I'd always come for you

You know I'd always come for you.

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Avan, Aval Adhu 228

Daksha looked at her husband Partha and quipped, ' Babe, I don't know much about these two love birds and what they have going on between them. But, I am glad about one thing, one change that it has brought about in our wise old friend here.'

Partha peered at Ravi from the table and after examining him thoroughly from head to toe, shook his head and declared, ' I am sorry, ma'am. I see no change and I have to say here that my eyes see that same miserable old dog with its gloomy expression.'

Daksha punched his arm and looked at Ravi with a horrified expression and apologized. ' Sorry boss, but I don't agree with my husband's views or personal opinions about his close friends.'

Partha looked at her accusingly and mockingly said, ' Which of my personal opinions you don't agree with? That it is an old dog or an old gloomy dog?'

Saying that he burst out laughing at his own joke and then realizing that none of them were laughing at his joke, he looked sheepishly at Ravi and Daksha and said, ' Okay, ducks, I will bite. What is it that you see differently in this ...'

Ravi growled his threat, ' Say it, please. Say it one more time. I dare you to say it. But, don't blame me after that for the consequences that you will have to face.'

Gayatri saw Partha's face take on a frightened look and then slowly wearing a very innocent expression and pretending not to have heard the warnings, and the threats from Ravi, he told Daksha, ' I am sorry babe. I don't see any major change in my dear friend here apart from the fact that he looks a lot younger and smarter than the last time we saw him.'

With a smile, she asked Daksha, ' what's with your husband and his sudden switcheroo?'

' Old memories probably that still sting to this day ' Daksha said and elbowed her husband, ' bro, do you want me to share some of those memories with Gayatri here?'

Partha shook his head and without a word looked at the table and at the window. Everywhere else but Ravi's eyes.

Daksha's face looked very serene and calm as she stared at Ravi and then spoke aloud about the changes that she saw in him.

' Love suits you, my old friend. You wear it well and I must say that you are wearing that beautiful soul in your arms pretty well too.'

Ravi bent his head in respect and said, ' Thank you, ducks. You said it right and I agree with you that I feel great, new and alive wearing this beautiful lady on me and in me.'

Partha mumbled to himself and Ravi growled again, ' what? what was that?' and moved threateningly asked, ' did you just have the balls to say that any old dog will look good with Gayatri in his arms?'

Before Partha could blink an eye, or think of an answer, Ravi had moved and he did the one thing that Partha had no defence against and he did the one thing that was his weakness.

For all his strength and bravado, there was one thing, one act that Partha could not handle and which was a secret that only very few people apart from Ravi and Daksha knew about.

Partha could not take tickling and if tickled, he would laugh, break down and worse..

Gayatri looked at Daksha with an expression that screamed, ' Are you kidding me? Do these guys behave like kids whenever they meet?'

Partha screamed loudly, ' Master, Master, forgive me. I surrender. I apologize. Please, not before Gayatri.'

Gayatri laughingly asked Daksha,' what is he going on about saying not before me? '

Ravi who had his right arm around Partha's neck, used his left hand to touch his friend's waist and asked sweetly, ' Will you do the honours or do you want to give a practical demonstration pal?'

Partha hollered loudly, ' No da. No, please' and looked at Gayatri, ' If I get tickled too much, I lose control......'

' of his bladder. What he means by that is he pees in his pants like a toddler' Ravi said and Gayatri could not hold herself back any longer and began to laugh and collapsed to the ground laughing her guts out and laughing her pain and burdens out.

Avan, Aval Adhu 229

Holding him by his shirt collar, she stood looking up into his eyes and this prompted Ravi to ask her jokingly, ' ma'am, have you lost something of yours in my eyes?'

Parthiban enthusiastically yelled, ' Finders keepers, Gayatri. Dei, Ravi, don't give it back for it belongs to you now.'

All of them including Partha knew what it was they were talking about but Ravi still smiling corrected Partha.

' Sorry, da. It does not work like that at all. When somebody loses something valuable and realizes you have it and comes to claim it. You are obligated to return it. '

Partha made a sour-looking expression as if he had suddenly bitten down on something horribly bitter and told Daksha in a loud voice, ' When will this moron stop being a teacher? For God's sake, he is less of a friend and more of a teacher nowadays.'

His face full of pity and sympathy, he looked at Gayatri, ' My deepest condolences and heartfelt apologies to you, missy for falling in love with a teacher.'

' It's okay, bro. He is my own private and exclusive teacher and I am sure that I can take anything that he dishes out ' Gayatri emphatically declared and looked at Ravi who said, ' Partha, It is not just finders keepers but also losers weepers. That is how that saying goes.'

' So what da, machaan.'

' Chee. Don't be like that, please. Just because you find something by accident does not mean it automatically belongs to you. You are morally and ethically obligated to return it to its rightful owner.'

Daksha who had remained quiet until then raised her hand and said, ' your honour, a small doubt. What if the owner is dead and has no family or heirs? What if you can't find the owner or if others come forward with false claims? What will you do then? Will you give it away to the wrong person or keep it in your safekeeping and wait for the rightful owner to return?'

All three of them heard her and felt her question in their own ways and in various degrees. Gayatri as was her nature went still in shock and her eyes grew large in anger as she glared at Daksha but then her second reaction was to look at Ravi and see what he was feeling. More importantly, what he must be thinking.'

Partha's immediate reaction was his immediate answer, ' If it was me, I would keep it. Dead owner, no family, no one to leave behind.........' and then he stopped, froze, and looked with his mouth agape at his wife and then turned and looked at Ravi and Gayatri and mumbled, ' Oh! Omg! Oh f..k.' and quickly yelled, ' Ducks, for Christ's sake, what are you doing?'

Daksha replied innocently and blinked her eyes cartoonishly, ' Baby, I am doing nothing. Just asking some questions and getting them cleared by master sir here.'

Gayatri's voice held a bit of bitterness and a lot of sarcasm in it as she spoke to Parthiban. ' My turn to offer you my deepest condolences and heartfelt apologies.'

Daksha slanted her head to signal to Gayatri that she accepted her point and was conceding a point but also signalled that the game of questions and answers was not over.

' Master sir, what if two owners pop up at the same time to claim their property and what if both their claims have legitimacy and moral standing?'

Gayatri felt a cold rapidly filling her heart and seeping all over her body. But, this question, though dark and morbid in its essence was a valid one and unable to quell her curiosity she looked at Ravi who stood staring at Daksha.

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