*From & To Sathish* - Thread 4 - Page 16

Thank you spain.I truly appreciate your efforts in trying to help me by posting the pics of my new film,even though it failed.No problemo.Thank you very much.I am sorry that i troubled you with my request.All the best.

Jannal oram -160

There is no greater agony than bearing an untold story inside you--Maya Angelou

Raman and Govindan Nair,affectionately called "achaa"( meaning father in Malayalam) stood watching Kavita drive away in her BMW and before raman could utter a word,Govindan twinkled his eyes and also his pearly whites of his new dentures ' don't tell me that you thought that car belonged to me when you came in.'

Raman bit his tongue in embarrassment ' sorry achaa but i am guilty of what i am being accused of.But,honestly,i was happy that you finally decided to indulge in the luxuries and enjoy all your wealth that you have earned through decades of hard work.'

Govindan nair thoughtfully ' Ramu kutty,does it really matter in which car we travel for i find all the cars the same once i am in it.It is all in the mind my young man.'

Then looking at raman in mock anger ' ha,ha,ha.And this conversation with me by you who still drives a beat up hyundai santro that all though well maintained is nearly 10 years old or maybe older.'

' Achaa,my santro is going on 13.'

Govindan nair ' 13.Now maybe you should really sell it and get yourself a new car.All the more important since you are not single anymore.'

Raman inclined ' well,i lost my single status just a few months ago and i have been wanting to come over and talk to you and maybe bring her along too,so that i can officially introduce her to you.'

' Raman,i have seen her from the time her family came here nearly twenty years ago.Jeeva is a fantastic woman and i think you have made one of the wisest choices in your life and that is saying something for i have no clue if you have ever made any bad choices in your life.so,i think both of you make a great team and a grand couple.I give you both my blessings my child.'

Raman sighed and jokingly ' Mr.Govindan nair,is there anything you are not aware of in this place called Saidapet.'

Getting just a wise smile from the older man,Raman ' and i am not going to even ask what the ministers daughter was doing here and add to that one more important thing and that is what is this museum for MGR doing here and how long has this been going on achaa.'

' The reason for kavita being here was to discuss some very important party matters and only a very few know that i am a huge contributor for the AIADMK party.But coming to the subject of this museum,this memento,this memorial for MGR that i have built here,then it is simply because i owe a lot to him and in fact i owe all this to him and his generous heart.'

Raman stayed quiet waiting for Achaa to continue,but saw clearly that the older man was struggling to control his intense emotions and memories.

Govindan nair with wet eyes ' Ram,There were many great things about MGR but i found a few things very endearing and that was he thought very highly about educated people and always addressed people whom he respected a lot as " AANDAVANE."

Raman scanned the entire hall and turning to Govindan nair ' achaa,there are so many rare pics here that should be shared and seen by his fans and followers.But what are they doing locked up here in this remote hall.'

Achaa walked slowly,stopping to stare at each memory frozen as black and white pic ' he is safe here raman.He is safe and continues to live on in peace and among people who really love him and treasure him.'

Seeing raman's expression ' strange words i guess but i will just speak a few more words about this topic and then we will leave him in peace for tonight.'

' Raman,the moment the late AMMA came to power,Mgr was pushed out of the light and was relegated just to a stamp size pic even in a huge poster in which jayalalitha's face towered over him and everyone.His memory was kindled only when needed during elections or during his birthday and his death anniversary.But like me,his ardent fan and party member,there exists many who realise how his memory has been relegated to the darkness when he is the man who founded this party that rules today and sits in power.

Then he quickly grabbed raman by his arm ' forget all that and tell me how you have been faring.Is everything ok with you and your work?'

Raman had come with a split mind and had wondered if he should seek Govindan nair's counsel and help to watch over their safety in and around their houses,but now decided against it for he thought it would be adding to the old man's burden if he came to know that he was locked in a rather deadly struggle against one of the most powerful ministers of the ruling party.

Instead he smiled and tapped his chest like they did in the film PK ' All is well achaa.All is well.A few niggles and also a rather interesting case but nothing that is beyond my capacity.'

He flashed a loving and gentle smile ' i just felt like seeing you for it had been sometime since we met.'

Looking at his watch ' achaa,i better get going for it is late and my parents are going to start worrying and that is something i don't want them to do for i don't to burden them or anyone even with the slightest of tensions or stress.'

He exited the compound and saying good night walked away towards his house that lay a few streets away.

Govindan nair smiled ' Kavita was right and yes,raman is too loving and kind to ask and burden anybody for help and so it is perfect that others come forward to his help without even being asked to do so.'

' For even Lord Rama needed the help of Hanuman and his team to conquer Ravana.Well my ramu kutty,i will be your Hanuman and i will see to it that you and your family are safe.'

"No one is without troubles, without personal hardships and genuine challenges. That fact may not be obvious because most people don't advertise their woes and heartaches. But nobody, not even the purest heart, escapes life without suffering battle scars. Richelle E. Goodrich, Smile Anyway

Jannal oram -161


"When I say it's you I like, I'm talking about that part of you that knows that life is far more than anything you can ever see or hear or touch. That deep part of you that allows you to stand for those things without which humankind cannot survive. Love that conquers hate, peace that rises triumphant over war, and justice that proves more powerful than greed. Fred Rogers


The streets were better lit now than what it used to be back in his college days and yet Raman saw many were not working properly and he told himself that he needed to remind the local councilor about it and knowing Chitti babu very well,he knew the man would get it repaired immediately and then he entered his street and he saw Jeeva standing there looking anxiously in his direction.

Ramam knew that since he was in the dark,she would not be able to see him.But he could see her clearly in the light as she stood holding the gate and peering into the darkness waiting for him.

Today she was still dressed in the same orange saree with a red border and a red blouse to match it and the day had taken a toll on her long,thick hair and many tresses had escaped their bands and pins and floated around as if they wanted to break free from her head and float towards their lover,raman who stood watching her.

Jeeva stood worrying and wondering where raman had gone off to and her heart kept beating faster and faster and she could not quell her anxiety although his mother valliammai had told her that he had just gone to meet a friend who lived a few streets away.

Then she saw him emerge from the darkness and she saw his white shirt before she saw him and then her feet lost control and they began to run and run and she fell into his arms.

He looked at her and she looked up into his eyes and then realising that they were in the street and thanking god for keeping it empty and not letting anyone see them and their passion began to walk back together towards his house.

He opened the gate but did not close it and placing a finger on his lips and conveying her to be quiet,held her and walked to the garage that was behind the house and in the darkness,hugged her tightly and then kissed her softly.Jeeva bit his lip ' My sweet lover,ithu thaan unga kissa.Kiss me properly so that it can linger on my lips throughout the night and keep both pain and sweetness as my companions.'

Raman kissed her and they stood kissing and then he mumbled into her lips and drawing back 'you said something' and he nodded ' yes,i was just saying that you looked so beautiful,like a painting,a statue in the temple.'

Jeeva raised an eyebrow ' i hate to admit it but i love it when you talk about me like this,like a poet.go on unless there is nothing more to talk about me.'

Raman smiled and hugged her gently to his chest ' sweetheart,I love you.I love you so much that sometimes my hands and legs start shivering in fear when i think something bad might happen to you and to us and now with this problem i have begun to worry more and sadly i am cursing the day i met you.'

Jeeva looked at him and ran her tongue slowly on his lips and the sensations ran down and between his legs and he looked at her ' what,no reaction for my bold statement?'

She smiled ' Mr.raman,i guess most would feel pain and anger if they heard their lover say things like that but then you are not most men and importantly i am not most women.I know why you said it and understand it perfectly.'

with her eyes still on him,she ran her palms down his crotch and felt him shiver and he squeaked ' adi paavi,naa eppadi thoongarathu.'

They kissed for a few more minutes and raman ' come let us go in before they start worrying about us both.'

If jeeva's and raman 's parents were worried they did not show it in the slightest but both the men and both the women exchanged glances and kamakshi joining valliammai in the kitchen ' kamakshi,Dont worry for i know where raman and jeeva are right now and i guess both of us know what they are doing in the garage behind the house.'

Shaktivel's keen ears had picked up the gate noise and he had smiled for he knew that raman had returned and had met up with jeeva who had been waiting for him at the gate and he knew pretty well that lovers would seek privacy and quiet for their love and that place in the compound was their garage and he smiled and jeeva's dad manigandan knew from that smile and understood what the young were up to and all four of them went about their work as if they knew nothing.


Outside in the quiet of his garage,raman looked at her ' Jeeva,people say that sex feels great when you are in love and i bet that is true and i bet that sex between us will be spectacular.But,this kisses,these moments with you also take my breath away.Each time i see you feels like the first time and each time you come into my chambers feels like a dream.'

She hugged him tightly ' baby,sex is all good but highly overrated for without true and pure love in your heart there can be no real fire in your loins.Physical hunger,youthful zest and passions aside,i think real sex happens in the soul when we see and recognise each other for who we are and accept that wholeheartedly.'

' WOW! That was so beautiful baby.And i thank you and declare that i feel the same for you.'

Jeeva kissed him softly ' ram,i am telling you right now and also giving you advance warning that you should obey and do all that i want when we are in bed.'

Raman smiled ' okay ma'am.I promise to do and give you my best.Now,for some poetry that best suits this moment please.'

Jeeva looked at him ' have you heard of this lady called Kamala das' and Raman nodded ' vaguely.If i am correct then she converted to islam and was called Kamala Surayya until her death.'

Jeeva nodded ' Bold woman and a great poet and in all her poems there is one that i find apt for you and me and for our love.Shall i sing it you.'

Raman tenderly lifted the few strands of hair that had fallen her cheeks and forehead ' Yes please.I would love to ehar it from your lips with only this darkness,quiet and the trees and plants as the others in audience.'

Jeeva closed her eyes and remembering the poem took a few minutes to remember it well and then opening her eyes slowly she looked at raman and he saw her eyes filled with tears of love and happiness then her lips moved and the poetry came flowing out.


Ghanshyam

You have like a koel built your nest in the arbour of my heart.
My life, until now a sleeping jungle is at last astir with music.
You lead me along a route I have never known before
But at each turn when I near you
Like a spectral flame you vanish.
The flame of my prayer-lamp holds captive my future
I gaze into the red eye of death
The hot stare of truth unveiled.
Life is moisture
Life is water, semen and blood.
Death is drought
Death is the hot sauna leading to cool rest-rooms
Death is the last, lost sob of the relative
Beside the red-walled morgue.
O Shyam, my Ghanshyam


The entire life that we live will whiz past as you lay your head and are hopefully aware that your time is up and the end is near.What will you,what will you want and what will you remember.

If it is the last moment,i will think of that one kiss,one love and one breath and i will feel it on my lips,in my soul as entwined i take her and her kisses with me,locked and loaded and together we will depart,my kiss,my memory and my soul and together we will exist for eternity.


Live,love,laugh,let live,let love,let laugh and go in love from life and to death in eternity of love.

This is the complete poem by the simply awesome lady poet,Kamala das.

Ghanshyam - Kamala Das

Ghanshyam,
You have like a koel built your nest in the arbour of my heart.
My life, until now a sleeping jungle is at last astir with music.
You lead me along a route I have never known before
But at each turn when I near you
Like a spectral flame you vanish.
The flame of my prayer-lamp holds captive my future
I gaze into the red eye of death
The hot stare of truth unveiled.
Life is moisture
Life is water, semen and blood.
Death is drought
Death is the hot sauna leading to cool rest-rooms
Death is the last, lost sob of the relative
Beside the red-walled morgue.
O Shyam, my Ghanshyam
With words I weave a raiment for you
With songs a sky
With such music I liberate in the oceans their fervid dances
We played once a husk-game, my lover and I
His body needing mine,
His ageing body in its pride needing the need for mine
And each time his lust was quietned
And he turned his back on me
In panic I asked Dont you want me any longer dont you want me
Dont you dont you
In love when the snow slowly began to fall
Like a bird I migrated to warmer climes
That was my only method of survival
In this tragic game the unwise like children play
And often lose
At three in the morning
I wake trembling from dreams of a stark white loneliness,
Like bleached bones cracking in the desert-sun was my loneliness,
And each time my husband,
His mouth bitter with sleep,
Kisses, mumbling to me of love.
But if he is you and I am you
Who is loving who
Who is the husk who the kernel
Where is the body where is the soul
You come in strange forms
And your names are many.
Is it then a fact that I love the disguise
and the name more than I love you?
Can I consciously weaken bonds?
The child's umbilical cord shrivels and falls
But new connections begin, new traps arise
And new pains
Ghanashyam,
The cell of the eternal sun,
The blood of the eternal fire
The hue of the summer-air,
I want a peace that I can tote
Like an infant in my arms
I want a peace that will doze
In the whites of my eyes when I smile
The ones in saffron robes told me of you
And when they left
I thought only of what they left unsaid
Wisdom must come in silence
When the guests have gone
The plates are washed
And the lights put out
Wisdom must steal in like a breeze
From beneath the shuttered door
Shyam O Ghanshyam
You have like a fisherman cast your net in the narrows
Of my mind
And towards you my thoughts today
Must race like enchanted fish...

Journey


"Music expresses that which cannot be put into words and that which cannot remain silent Victor Hugo


I have very,very keen ears that pick up the slightest noise and that makes for a poor sleeper and top that with Insomnia,well my lovelies,we have here a specimen who is destined to be a zombie and walk around in a trance,half asleep and half awake.

I remember those rainy days when me and my kutty navin used to sit at our door step and watch the rain fall on the granite floor of the courtyard and we used to hold out our hands and squeal like puppies and mewl like kittens when the cold rain drops crashed into our pink and brown,tender palms.

I was always the bold one and i think i got all the aggrssion,anger,rage from my dad and maybe a bit of patience and love from my mother and this made me do things and i always threw caution in the wind and indulged myself and my whims and fancies.

Like standing and getting wet in the rain and believe me it was worth the spanking that my mum landed on my tiny bum and only a torn kakhi shorts shielded me from the full impact.But,i must confess that i was a hardy chap and physical pain was a threshold that was very high for me.

All i had to do was blink and blank myself out from the pain and trance myself out and that trick has served me well over the years but has failed me totally sometimes.I guess,percentage it has helped me more than let me down.

But back to the rain drops,puddles and getting drenched for the rain was a real mystery to me and even when i was three or four,i used to lie awake in the night hearing the thunder clouds rage and make war over my tiled house in Bangalore.

The light effects only put a smile in my face and soul for i knew that the rains had come and that it was playtime.

I don't remember much of what kind of slippers or footwear that i wore those days for it was always running like a puppy and barefoot.But the golden rule was,always wash feet before entering the house and i broke that rule many a time.

The rains would come with a tap here and tap there on the tiles that separated me and my family from the nature outside and then with sudden burst they would roar and i used to listen with great fascination and i still do for the music that mother nature makes is so beautiful.

My young imagination was vivid even then and i used to think that rain gods were dancing on the roofs of all the houses they had landed on and i wondered if i could join them and their music for it felt like a great party.

Even now,decades later,i refuse to look at the rain,waves of the sea,green grass and dew drops as just another part of nature and i look at them with the same intense eyes and unbridled eyes that the brown boy had when he was three and i always look at the clouds as they bathe my pain away ' Lift me up,please let me rise and let me be with you for a moment.'

My wife always complains to me that the dogs and puppies that live around our neighbourhood do not play with her and show the same affection that they all show me and i smile and say ' my princess,they look at you as a human being but they look at me as one of their own.'

She tries to make sense of my rather foolish reply and walks away ' neeyum loosu,antha nayungalum loosunga.Loosukku thaan innoru loosa theriyum.'


Right,now for a list of my favourite songs and they span decades.I am not sure if you will like them but i am sure that some of them will perk up your ears and tug at the strings of your soul and i know that they will put a smile on your face like they do to mine and never fail.


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O30VrnLuvmU
Bahon Mein Chale Aao Film- Anamika


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TFr6G5zveS8
woh kaun thi lag ja gale

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BpLyDTEw3Z4

Aaj Phir Jeene Ki Tamanna Hai

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QpfolokBUik

Nadiya Kinare Herai Aayee (HD) - Abhimaan

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AHF0x7H5TaU

Yaarathu Sollamal Nenjalli Povathu-Nenjamellam Neeyae

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o32O5g_Kack

Malare Mounama

Pachai endra Pachaiappan's love story

Part one of three

We are all the heroes and heroines of our own lives. Our love stories are amazingly romantic; our losses and betrayals and disappointments are gigantic in our own minds. Maeve Binchy


The whole country knew who retired college Professor Pachaiappan was in a matter of hours through whats app and you tube and the rest woke up to the headlines in all tamil and english papers screaming ' Retired professor immolates himself for Kaveri.At death's door' and with this new immolation adding to the already rising number even the center sat up and took notice although there was little they could do and what had to be done had to be done by Karnataka.

This also spurred the ruling govt in Tamil Nadu to become more aggressive and whispers were that the govt was gearing to fight with the central govt although rumors were that it was simply because of the very same villains that they still remained in power.

Pachaiappan was called pachai among his family and relations but was nicknamed as " Patch" in college where he studied and also by the faculty members when he began to teach economics.

Now pachaiappan lay in the ICU ward of Fortis hospital,Adyar that was formerly called Malar hospitals and his eyes flickered open and his ears picked up the faint beeps of all the machines and he remembered quickly the moments that had brought him to this state in the ICU.


Pachaiappan was 68 years old and add to that a month that had just passed by and so he had born in the year 1950,march 15th and he had been the only son to a poor set of parents.His dad had been a watchman and his mother had multi tasked as a cook,maid servant,nanny,milk maid and sometimes as a car and bike washer.

Both worked in the same locality in T.nagar and their house was nearby in a housing board flat that was barely 500 ft.But it worked and worked well that they lived there for nearly 25 years and only moved to a bigger place when pachai had begun to make money by taking tuition classes while he prepared for his PHD.

Pachaiappan had been lucky with food and academics but unlucky in love and looks.

He was born a Dravidian featured boy and blessed with below average looks but with an above average mind and thirst to do well and this served him well and also got him the job of lecturer in Madras university where he would remain until his retirement.

Pachaiappan had fallen in love with a beautiful but blind woman in college but remained mute for he did not want to ruin the respect that the lady in question had for him and they just like that college was over and they went their ways.

But pachaiappan kept in touch with all the happenings in the life of the woman that he had loved and also had secretly helped her parents when their family had fallen into hard times.

Then his marriage happened and Komathi came into his life and nothing was the same again.She had point blankly told him that she had been forced into the marriage by her parents and that she had agreed to take revenge on her boy friend who had ditched her for another.

Pachaiappan not knowing what to say or how to react looked at his new partner ' that part is done and now we will start a new part between ourselves.'

The lights went out and pachai fumbled while his wife komathi grumbled and mumbled and somehow he managed to slip into her and after a few thrusts finished,rolled over and went to sleep.

This,so was the trend and sex life of pachaiappan although he secretly dreamnt of his lost love and knew that he would have been a great lover if she had been the one in the bed.

So,pachai moved on with his dreams and komathi lived on in love and anger at her old boy friend and then time and life happened and along with it happened two children.First came lata and next came Kumaran.

There was many a time when pachaiappan stood in the bus stop wondering what others lives were like and if he should be doing anything better and different but time and life happened.

Pachaiappan's parents passed away and the housing board flat that they had lived was about to be demolished for it had been brought up by a popular real estate company.They compensated handsomely for that tiny flat and pachaiappan wisely purchased a ground near adyar and built a small independent house by taking a bank loan.

38 years had been spent and it was in that house that his daughter lata's engagement had happened and she was now a citizen of canada where she taught,you guessed right Economics.Kumaran too had gotten married and now lived in England and yes,he too taught but not economics but Physics.


Pachaiappan was now a grand father twice over for both his children had their own children and time and life happened.


His eyes flickered open and he panicked but vaguely heard the nurse say ' it is okay,just the oxygen mask.don't try removing it.'

He let his eyes travel around and realised that he could only see through one eye and he remembered the flames as it leapt and held him in its deadly grip.

He tried to smile but could not for his lips were burnt off and then his ears registered the nurse whispering to the doctors ' 90 percent frontal burns,diabetic and a rather weak heart.'

The doctor,a young man smiled and staring into pachaiappan's eyes ' sir,we will do our best to save you.You are a hero and i am proud to serve you.'

Pachaiappan smiled although his lips and cheeks were charred and his remaining cataract covered right eye twinkled in response and the doctor nodded ' that is the spirit.'

Pachaiappan then closed his eyes and slipped into a coma that his own brain had induced probably to shut out all the pain that was screaming from every naked nerve point,now burnt and festering as bacteria began to enter his defense less body.

Pachaiappan came out his coma after two days and he was screaming,although it was only heard as squeaks for his throat had been burnt out as well as his lungs and yet they all heard his words ' Kaveri,Kaveri,Kaveri.'

This was recorded and uploaded by someone and it brought tears to everyone's eyes and so the chief minister and the entire cabinet landed in the hospital to pay their respects for it was now known that pachai had only a few more hours to live.

Pachaiappan kept slipping in and out of coma and when he briefly came out of it,he saw the chief minister standing there with his hands folded and his wife standing next to him with tears in her eyes and pachaiappan roared for the final time with love,frustration and anger filling and giving strength to his roar ' Kaveri.Kaveri,Kaveri.'

Pachaiappan died on April 18th and was cremated with state honors and there were talks about a statue of him being set up in the madras university.

We're nothing if we're not loved. When you meet somebody who is more important to you than yourself, that has to be the most important thing. Maeve Binchy

Pachai endra Pachaiappan-2

The great poet is a great artist. He is painter and sculptor. The greatest pictures and statues have been painted and chiseled with words. They outlast all others. Robert Green Ingersoll


The death of Pachaiappan became a matter of great debate and it raged and was ravaged in all tamil tv channels and finally reached the parliament.It had been one month since the passing of pachaiappan and the summer session started and when the chief minister of Tamil nadu stood up and delivered a tearful message in which he described how he personally saw the great pachaiappan scream " Kaveri,Kaveri" again and again with his last breath.'

And when he requested everyone to stand in silence in honor of pachaiappan's memory,it brought together all parties and everyone stood as one and all vowed to bring the waters of Kaveri to the dry and parched lands of tamil nadu.

The chief minister the delivered a bit of news that brought great cheer to all those present.

' I am sure all of you have heard about the great Modaiyur sculptors of Tiruvannamalai district whose forefathers were brought to Modaiyur by the ruler of Kanchi (Kancheepuram) centuries ago to build a Shiva temple to mark his victory over the Nawabs of Arcot.The king of Kanchi prayed to Shiva that he would build a temple if he won the war against the Arcot Nawabs. Though he won the war, the king returned to his capital without fulfilling his promise. Hence, his army was stuck (Modai) at a place en route.Realising he did not fulfill his promise, the king brought a group of sculptors from his kingdom and built a Shiva temple at the same spot that was later named Modaiyur. The sculptors stayed behind in the village.

These great sculptors work only in temples and on statues of gods and goddesses,but have come forward to sculpt the statue of our tamil hero Pachaiappan.In fact,their master who had retired from this craft has come out of his retirement for one last work of art and that is to dedicate to our state the statue of Pachaiappan.'

Everyone stood up clapping and roars and cheers filled the secretariat and thus may 18th was fixed for the opening of th statue and dedicating it to the tamil people.


The blind woman sat in her room far removed from the society and in the same room in which she had stayed when she had become a member of the teaching staff for the visually impaired in St. Louis Institute for Deaf & the Blind.

Now at the age of 68,she rarely ventured out from her room and only came out early in the morning and late in the evening for her prayers to Jesus.

She had converted to Christianity in her very first year as a teacher and now as then was called Sister Mary and also Mother mary by many of the teenagers and adults too.

Sister mary bloomed like a red rose that had been caressed by the morning sun,when she was called mother mary for she had never married and now considered all the blind children in the institute as her very own and like that is so instinctive of the blind,they knew,saw and felt the love in her soul and they too responded to her with their love.

It was nearly 7.30 pm when sister mary using her cane slowly tapped her way to the small chapel that was behind the institute and immediately sensed another's presence and recognised it as brother matthew.

She smiled not knowing or ever having seen a smile and it was the same with blind brother matthew and she greeted ' brother matthew,this is a surprise and that too today being a friday,when they serve pooris and potatoes for dinner and which happens to be your favourite dish.So,what are you doing here instead of being in the dining hall.'

With tinkle in her voice and a twinkle in her dead eyes,Sister mary teased brother matthew ' now,don't tell me you are praying for more pooris today and the custard dessert that has been so lovingly contributed by some five star hotel.'

Brother matthew replied ' no sister,i am not praying for pooris although that is a good idea.But i am here praying for the memory of a man who died for our people and sacrificed his life to bring water for our lands.'

Sister mary ' oh no.Please don't tell me another innocent soul has been lost.'

' I am sorry sister but what this man did and also did when dying has stoked the emotions and tamil patriotism in this state and i too am feeling the pain of this great man's sacrifice.'

Sister mary smiled sadly and looking in the direction of the brother ' it takes great courage to immolate oneself.If you can and if you don't mind losing a few pooris,then please tell me about this man who died.'

Five minutes later,brother matthew stood up and tapped with his cane ' sister,i am hungry and am leaving to the dining hall.want to walk with me.'

Sister mary clearing her throat ' no brother,i think i will stay here for a few more minutes.please,you carry on.'

Sister mary sat in the darkness that belongs to the blind and heard the receding tap,tap noises of brother matthew cane and then began to sob and cry loudly.

' Patch,patch.Oh you silly,silly man.where did you find the strength and courage to do what you did my dear one? My lord,my heart breaks to think of how much pain he must have gone through before dying.'

Sister mary sat in the darkness praying to the lord jesus to watch over Pachai's soul and hold it there in heaven while she joined him,so that they could be together again,forever.'

Pachai endra Pachaiappan-3


If you ask me what i think about love,then i think the greatest love stories are all around you filling every moment of everyday of our lives.Some of the greatest love stories are those that were never told or revealed to each other but stayed like a bud,a snow flake,the first rain drop and frozen in the lover's souls.

Then again there are those great love stories,sagas,epics and you can see it in the average man and woman who go to work in their offices,houses,to clean,cook,bathe and care for their families.I see an old lady dropping milk early in the morning at about 4.30 am and she told me that she is doing it to educate her grand children.

There is a great story in all of us for we are all lovers and we have been put on this planet to give and get love.In the end,only love can solve all problems and bring together the most bitter of enemies and rivals.
All you have to do is feel it for love is a strange brew and it is made up of empathy,sympathy,patience,tolerance,forgiveness and so much more and if you look at it,sex makes up a very tiny bit of it.All is possible only because of love and love,yes,love is God.

Ladduvum urundai
Ulagamum urundai
laddu amma pannathu
ulagam kadavul seithathu


Sister Mary remembered the time,the years when she and patch had met at college and she had seen him and felt him through his voice and the way he was around her,gentle and soft and totally mad about her.

She had waited many a time for pachaiappan to open his soul to her and waited for the moment when she could say yes.But sadly that moment never came and then she had found jesus in her heart although strangely she felt the same love for pachai that she felt for her lord.

With trembling fingers,sister mary dailed a lanline number and after a few rings her younger sister Kumudha picked it up and answered and hearing her elders sisters voice,yelled ' akka,eppadi irukke.sorry sister mary.Come on,now you are already my sister and i have to call you sister mary.nalla joku.'

Sister mary liked these rare conversations she had with her younger sister,younger by nearly ten years for their parents had thought long and hard and in great fear that their next child would be born blind or with something far worse.But then they had decided to have one more child( a healthy child) and Kumudha had been born.

' Kumudha,i need a favor.I need to go visit this place end of next month and i was wondering if you could come and pick me up.Only,if it is not too much trouble.'

Kumudha with a very soft and tender voice ' akka,how can you even mention the word trouble when you are talking to me.It is because of your hard work and money that both my kids had a great education and are well placed in big companies.I doubt if i could have done it without your help after shekar passed away so suddenly from a cardiac arrest.I owe everything to you and here you are making me feel so guilty by talking about if it will be trouble for me to take you out where you want to go.'

Mary smiled ' chellam,you are like my very own child that i never had and that is why i don't want to trouble in any way.'

Both the sisters spoke and kumudha agreed to come over and take mary to the place that she wanted to visit.


For a brief while,there was even talk about erecting the statue of pachaiappan on the marina but then it was thought that it would become a precedent for others who were less deserving of such an honor and in the end,it was decided to place the statue in the campus of madras university where pachaiappan had taught economics for nearly 25 years.


The statue was opened by mrs.komathi pachaiappan and on the stage stood all the leaders of all the big parties of the state.It was broadcast live on all channels and a minute of silence was observed in the lok sabha too.

Two weeks passed and the statue stood with dried up garlands and a still fresh looking sandalwood garland,although it was smeared a bit by the droppings of birds.


Kumudha and sister mary walked slowly into the campus and reached the spot where the statue stood and the elder one asked the younger one for some privacy and kumudha nodded and replied ' okay akka,i will just go pick up some water from the canteen which is on the other side of the campus.you will be okay no.'

Sister mary ' podi chellam,i have been blind from birth but i can sense and see with my soul and ears.Of course i will be okay.I just need five minutes to pay my respects to this great and gentle soul.'

Kumudha walked away leaving her sister to herself and sister mary stood with her cane and in her grey clothes that showed her as a nun and she stood with her palms closed,face up in prayer.

The clouds came over in large numbers and shielded both the souls as they stood face to face,one blind and another dead but alive in her blind soul.

The news had made headlines and the very famous national tv channel " TIMES NOW " had landed in chennai to cover the water problem and just so happened to be in the madras university campus at that moment sister mary was looking up blindly and lost in prayer.


Journalist anita signaled to her camera man to roll and she began to speak as she walked towards sister mary ' This is a moment that is rarely captured on television and here we have that moment when a sister of a different faith is standing before the hero pachaiappan who was a hindu by birth and it is obvious that she is praying for the man's soul.The whole of tamil nadu has united and has come together to demand their fair share of the water from Kaveri and now Karnataka has begun to respond with positive signs and there seems to be relief for the agricultural lands of tamil nadu.'

Anita continued ' we bring you these breaking news that it is raining heavily and steadily in the southern districts of tamil nadu and the weather report says that it will rain for a few more days.'


Both the team of cameraman and anchor slowly approached the sister who sensed their presence and turning to them spoke 'can i help you?'

Sister mary was informed by anita who she and the cameraman were and they they asked her what she thought about the announcement by karnataka that they would release water in a few days.

Sister mary smiled ' i am sorry my children but i have no opinions and thoughts about such matters.I am sorry to disappoint you but i cannot help you with these questions.forgive me and go in peace and in the mercy of the lord,our savior.'

Times now news anchor,Anita sighed and looked at her cameraman and both left to find better people with better and more violent answers for that is what the viewers wanted and craved for.


Sister mary looked up blindly and then tapping her cane slowly moved forward and felt the statue and her fingers slowly caressed the face of pachaiappan and she whispered ' Kaveri vanthaachu.Naa vanthuten,unga kaveri vanthaatchu.'




From the time he had retired,Pachaiappan had purchased a second hand cycle and had begun to cycle everywhere he went and wanted to go and his routine was to cycle from his house in Adyar to marina beach where the Bharathiyar statue stood and come back slowly in time for breakfast and then retire to his room to read and dream,dream of kaveri,the only woman he had loved and the blind woman who he had thought was too beautiful and too good for him.

That day started like any day but then he was shocked to see a group of drunk men pouring petrol on a very young boy who too was totally drunk to know that he was going to die in a horrible manner.

Pachai had leapt to his feet and had managed to push the boy away but then the men had poured the petrol on him and had set fire to his body.

The moment the fire leapt up and enveloped him,Pachai knew his time was up and in those final moments of his tragedy,all he saw was his kaveri's face and the love he had felt for her and he roared from his soul her name and it tasted sweet and heavenly and he screamed again and again as the fire progressed without mercy and he kept screaming " Kaveri,kaveri,Kaveri" and felt alive even as he died and realised that he had only now lived to his fullest after declaring her name to the world around him and the world above.

Jannal oram -162

"Love is reverence, and worship, and glory, and the upward glance. Not a bandage for dirty sores. But they don't know it. Those who speak of love most promiscuously are the ones who've never felt it. They make some sort of feeble stew out of sympathy, compassion, contempt and general indifference, and they call it love. Once you've felt what it means to love as you and I know it - total passion for the total height - you're incapable of anything less. ? Ayn Rand, The Fountainhead


We call her life,mother nature,evolution but the majority know her and him as God.If this unseen knowledge,if this yet to be seen force of nature is what governs and rules over this vast place of ours which we call universe,then it is also a given that it knows how to look after itself.

If the human species is going to doom itself and end up destroying this home and all life in it then i am pretty sure that life will rise again somewhere else in this universe,some place better and will thrive for a long,long time.

For every Ravan,there is a Raman and for every surpanaka there is a jeeva.The thing about evil,the scariest thing about it really is how it corrupts and taints other lives with its temptations and gifts which are but short lived and are but an illusion.

Raman stood by the basin washing the plates and other utensils that had been used for dinner and he was lost in the thoughts of jeeva and how even a simple act of eating dinner was made beautiful by her presence.

Valliammai came in and taking a clean cloth from the cupboard began to wipe the washed cutlery and threw a look at her only son and seeing him lost in his own world,gently whacked him with the cloth ' Ram,why don't both of you get married son? In fact,a small temple wedding will do.A quiet,private affair and it will only involve us both families.'

Raman smiling ' no ma.It won't work like that and honestly i want our marriage to be grand and i want all my friends to be there.But..'

Valli nodded ' there it comes,the but.Always the but.'

' Mum,forget how the wedding will be done but remember the conditions jeeva has laid down.First suja's wedding and then the safety of her parents.And now,even if those conditions are met,i will have to solve this problem and handle this case for my client and his daughter and that at this moment does seem a bit of an uphill climb.'

Raman looked into his mother's eyes and smiled ' I am sorry mum' and valliammi hurriedly ' chee,chee.why apologise ram? you and jeeva should do what is comfortable and what is right for you?'

Ram took the cloth from his mother's hands and wiping his hands gently embraced her ' ma'am,i know your eyes pretty well and i think i know them better than you do for i have been seeing those eyes from the time i was born.I said sorry for carrying on with jeeva while you people were inside.'

Valliammai hugged her son tightly ' poda dei,all this is nothing for i guess what you both get up to is far less harmless than what teenagers and youngsters get up to and i know it pretty well for i have caught so many red handed in my own school.'

Shaktivel came in and leaning against the cupboard stood watching his two most favorite people in the world and added ' forget what others and you and jeeva get up to and ask her what she used to get up with her when i used to go pick her up from work?'

Valliammai blushed ' Mr.shaktivel,we were married and i think a wife has all the rights over her husband ' and shaktivel ' true,very true but i am talking about all those smoochings in the faculty room.'

Raman looked at both of them ' Faculty room.Well,coming to think of it,the garage does sound a lot more decent and also the right place for a bit of smooching and cuddling.'

Father,Mother and son went on late into the night and into the early hours of morning and that is how it should be for time has no place or part to play in the house of love and in those hearts that are filled with love.

It is not how long we lived but how well we lived and how much we loved and were loved.For,how else can we measure life and the time we spent living it.

India's cabinet approves death penalty for rapists of girls below the age of 12



So,I ask the Indian govt and Modi if that means women over 12 can be raped and that they will be dealt differently.Does that mean that when any woman over 12 until old age can be raped without any fear of the death penalty and that the rapists know that they can come out one day to rape again.

A rape is a rape and how does it differ between 12 and 100.Rape if proved should be dealt the same way and that is by giving out the death penalty.

How can this be possible when men make these landmark and important decisions without involving women.

She carries you,nurtures you,feeds you,lies under you,cooks for you and cares for you and nearly spends her whole life for the sake of you and this is the judgement.

I wonder what will be the reaction if the supreme court judges are faced with a rape victim that belong to their own family.Pray,please tell me what you will do then.

Death penalty for all rapists if proved and age,caste,creed of the victims should not matter.