Posted:
Part 1: Below
Part 2: https://www.indiaforums.com/forum/post/79478550
I wrote a scene before last week when there was talking of Kumud playing a prank on him and sending him to relive some memories. I only added the part about his seeing her, the sinking and the very last ending after the week because I wasn't sure how he was about to react. I just guessed the mother's drowning suicide.
As you will see...it was still surprisingly close. But I added the little risque end to it after the actual scene to make it a little fun. Hope you are looking forward to it! This forum does not seem really into OSs. In my last forum, we were crazy about stories, reading and writing.
Preview:
Kumud's prank gone wrong
Kumud does the unthinkable - passionate scene
Village in shock
Please be sure to write what you thought of it. No compliments necessary, just thoughts, the good and bad.
The OS:
He was cheating.
Intentionally or unintentionally it doesn't matter. He was staying too close and making her heart skip beats or pound too loudly for her concentrate on the kite flying. Insufferable guy, he was always wreaking havoc around her. If she did not limit his influence on her soon, he would turn her life upside down, Kumud thought bitterly as she chewed on her bottom lip.
He even managed to see her face today!
Saras whispered near her ear-shell: Kai po-che!
Kumud could not reign in her temper. Her little protege had cut HER out on his very first outing! Of course, there was a very logical explanation for it. That cheat!
Kumud snapped her head and gave him a quelling glare: You cannot win until you retrieve the kite.
Saras: Well, you did, when you cut the first kite.
Kumud: Mein! Mere liye...
Saras interrupted arrogantly, his eyes smirking at her: Tumhare liye rule different hai.
Kumud: You have to show your prize. Now go and get the kite (she huffed). It looked like it fell in the pond. I DARE you to go get it.
Saras was quiet.
Kumud: Don't tell me, you can't.
Saras: But...
Kumud: Itnisi himaat to jootahi sakte ho tum, nehi?
Saras pursed his lips: Fine.
He wadded into bank as Kumud watched.
A few minutes passed and then he was thrashing in the water. Kumud laughed.
Kumud: It is right there, go and get it if you can.
A few more minutes passed before a chill overcame her. What? Did he not know how to swim well? Why was he behaving like this? She could barely see him, he was underwater.
His head popped up and he was gasping for breath, calling out to his mother.
Oh my God, he will drown.
A small voice inside her head confirmed her suspicions and she started shaking.
Without thinking, Kumud jumped in after him: Saras!
She pulled as hard as she could to get him out of the water but he fought her just as hard, thrashing and incoherent. Finally, his body gave in. Alarmed that he had stopped breathing, she pulled him ashore using all her strength. The villagers had gathered around at this point and they helped her take him on to the bank.
"He's not breathing!" Someone exclaimed.
Kumud shrilled: Nahi, nahi this can't be.
She was drenched and breathless, shaking violently, feeling quite mad herself as the black cloud of death swept through her. She bent down to hear his heartbeat.
Kumud scrambled, pushing at his chest. Desperately this time.
Oh, what if she killed him?
Then it came to her, her teacher training course for the school kids in case something similar happened. Without second-guessing herself, she gave him a mouth-to-mouth resuscitation as some of the villagers gasped.
Someone commented: He will die if she doesn't take this last try.
Another: Someone call Vidyachatur Kaka! This is the Desais' new guest.
Kumud could feel her own breath becoming hard to draw, much less put in him with each passing second. Things were going dark.
Oh why did she have to fight with him all this time? A bone consuming regret chilled her.
He coughed and shook finally.
Music to her ears!
Crying, she pulled him up and hugged him fiercely: Thank God! Thank God! What were you doing in there!? You could have died!
The Desai family finally came and they were rushed home.
It was all a haze, Kumud did not remember much of what happened once they came in. She just knew that were were safe now, home, with Saras warmly tucked into her bed.
At night, in Kusum's bed...
She still could not get over her trembles as she had flashbacks of the moment she nearly lost him. Her kite blinked back at her teasingly. He had retrieved it and never let go. Once they got home, he gave it to her dad.
Kusum: Didi, kuch bataoge bhi ke aaj kya hua?
Kumud: I don't know. Don't make he speak of it. I am trying to sleep.
Kusum wrapped another blanket around her sister: You have been trying to sleep for hours, but clearly what happened is waging war inside you because you are shaking like a leaf. Tell me even if you don't tell anyone else. It will make you feel better.
Kumud: Oh Kusum, I nearly killed him (she burst into tears and hugged Kusum, crying).
Kusum: There there. Everything is okay now. He's fine.
Kumud: I couldn't hear his heartbeat for a second. My mind just went blank. Evwything...hm...everything stopped.
Kusum smiled, hugging her Didi: Including your heart.
Kumud: Yes! (She wiped her tears on Kusum's shoulder).
Kusum: Didi, the village is abuzz with the rumor that you kissed him. Is it true?
Kumud: No! I gave him a resuscitation. That's all...(she touched her lips, wondering how she could. It felt strange, to think their lips had touched, their breaths were shared. So strange).
Mary.
Part 2: https://www.indiaforums.com/forum/post/79478550
I wrote a scene before last week when there was talking of Kumud playing a prank on him and sending him to relive some memories. I only added the part about his seeing her, the sinking and the very last ending after the week because I wasn't sure how he was about to react. I just guessed the mother's drowning suicide.
As you will see...it was still surprisingly close. But I added the little risque end to it after the actual scene to make it a little fun. Hope you are looking forward to it! This forum does not seem really into OSs. In my last forum, we were crazy about stories, reading and writing.
Preview:
Kumud's prank gone wrong
Kumud does the unthinkable - passionate scene
Village in shock
Please be sure to write what you thought of it. No compliments necessary, just thoughts, the good and bad.
The OS:
He was cheating.
Intentionally or unintentionally it doesn't matter. He was staying too close and making her heart skip beats or pound too loudly for her concentrate on the kite flying. Insufferable guy, he was always wreaking havoc around her. If she did not limit his influence on her soon, he would turn her life upside down, Kumud thought bitterly as she chewed on her bottom lip.
He even managed to see her face today!
Saras whispered near her ear-shell: Kai po-che!
Kumud could not reign in her temper. Her little protege had cut HER out on his very first outing! Of course, there was a very logical explanation for it. That cheat!
Kumud snapped her head and gave him a quelling glare: You cannot win until you retrieve the kite.
Saras: Well, you did, when you cut the first kite.
Kumud: Mein! Mere liye...
Saras interrupted arrogantly, his eyes smirking at her: Tumhare liye rule different hai.
Kumud: You have to show your prize. Now go and get the kite (she huffed). It looked like it fell in the pond. I DARE you to go get it.
Saras was quiet.
Kumud: Don't tell me, you can't.
Saras: But...
Kumud: Itnisi himaat to jootahi sakte ho tum, nehi?
Saras pursed his lips: Fine.
He wadded into bank as Kumud watched.
A few minutes passed and then he was thrashing in the water. Kumud laughed.
Kumud: It is right there, go and get it if you can.
A few more minutes passed before a chill overcame her. What? Did he not know how to swim well? Why was he behaving like this? She could barely see him, he was underwater.
His head popped up and he was gasping for breath, calling out to his mother.
Oh my God, he will drown.
A small voice inside her head confirmed her suspicions and she started shaking.
Without thinking, Kumud jumped in after him: Saras!
She pulled as hard as she could to get him out of the water but he fought her just as hard, thrashing and incoherent. Finally, his body gave in. Alarmed that he had stopped breathing, she pulled him ashore using all her strength. The villagers had gathered around at this point and they helped her take him on to the bank.
"He's not breathing!" Someone exclaimed.
Kumud shrilled: Nahi, nahi this can't be.
She was drenched and breathless, shaking violently, feeling quite mad herself as the black cloud of death swept through her. She bent down to hear his heartbeat.
Kumud scrambled, pushing at his chest. Desperately this time.
Oh, what if she killed him?
Then it came to her, her teacher training course for the school kids in case something similar happened. Without second-guessing herself, she gave him a mouth-to-mouth resuscitation as some of the villagers gasped.
Someone commented: He will die if she doesn't take this last try.
Another: Someone call Vidyachatur Kaka! This is the Desais' new guest.
Kumud could feel her own breath becoming hard to draw, much less put in him with each passing second. Things were going dark.
Oh why did she have to fight with him all this time? A bone consuming regret chilled her.
He coughed and shook finally.
Music to her ears!
Crying, she pulled him up and hugged him fiercely: Thank God! Thank God! What were you doing in there!? You could have died!
The Desai family finally came and they were rushed home.
It was all a haze, Kumud did not remember much of what happened once they came in. She just knew that were were safe now, home, with Saras warmly tucked into her bed.
At night, in Kusum's bed...
She still could not get over her trembles as she had flashbacks of the moment she nearly lost him. Her kite blinked back at her teasingly. He had retrieved it and never let go. Once they got home, he gave it to her dad.
Kusum: Didi, kuch bataoge bhi ke aaj kya hua?
Kumud: I don't know. Don't make he speak of it. I am trying to sleep.
Kusum wrapped another blanket around her sister: You have been trying to sleep for hours, but clearly what happened is waging war inside you because you are shaking like a leaf. Tell me even if you don't tell anyone else. It will make you feel better.
Kumud: Oh Kusum, I nearly killed him (she burst into tears and hugged Kusum, crying).
Kusum: There there. Everything is okay now. He's fine.
Kumud: I couldn't hear his heartbeat for a second. My mind just went blank. Evwything...hm...everything stopped.
Kusum smiled, hugging her Didi: Including your heart.
Kumud: Yes! (She wiped her tears on Kusum's shoulder).
Kusum: Didi, the village is abuzz with the rumor that you kissed him. Is it true?
Kumud: No! I gave him a resuscitation. That's all...(she touched her lips, wondering how she could. It felt strange, to think their lips had touched, their breaths were shared. So strange).
Mary.
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