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To have her at an arms length and unable to reach out to her, to call her name out and not get a reply, and to hold her hand but to watch her remove it, pained Ahem. This isolation has hurt Ahem.
His pain was seen on his face as he looked on at her as he entered the house. This look continued when she declined his offer to take up the front seat in the car and more so when he watched her remove her hand from him as he held on to it.
He thought that since his mother was not in their presence when he arrived home she would be herself instead he got the cold treatment of being isolated and detached from her. She not only arranged for Meethi to give him his tea but to take out and give him his evening clothing as well. This told that she still cared for his well-being. He missed her not only for her warm hospitality in the way she would have done these tasks but just being together with her in their room was what mattered.
In the middle of the night he felt his isolation the most as he missed her more. An interesting thing was that his loneliness and despair neither made him reflect on what he did to her nor make him reflect on memories of the past rather his feeling of emptiness of not having her near him on the bed was of what he recently enjoyed.
Moreover, what perplexed him was her not wanting to be held by him. Did she despise him for his behaviour? Why would she do so now more than before? This is quite unlike his Gopi he understood her to be.
Ahem could not fathom her behaviour. This situation he had put both of them in has spiralled out of control getting to an irreparable stage. He could not understand how and why his behaviour could have such an effect.
He has once again resolved to talk to her with the want to make things right. How will he create this opportunity and what will he tell her to convince her that he did not mean anything he said in anger?
Cricket
