My Tangential take on Ahem !!!

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navyab

@navyab

Rocker

Posted: 13 years ago

Does Ahem really deserve the love & dedication of his wife Gopi ?

Ahem has come in front of his past love & he has forgotten about everything. He has forgotten about everything...he has forgotten about his wife, her love, her simplicity, her innocence...he has infact forgotten that few minutes back he was lost with her in his arms so much so that he was not even aware where they were...but the moment he saw Anita, everything has just flown away in the air !!! Ahem is angry that Anita is moving forward in her life & this has effected him so much !!! Well it shows how Ahem still feels for Anita & somewhere he had & has hopes that things will still workout between them !!! I can understand that if he had these kind of hopes when he did not care about his wife & his marriage but now when he though, not in words but in actions had shown how much he cares for his wife & what she means to him & how much he values his marriage contradict his own feelings !!! OR

Since he was not in touch with his past, had he just accepted his marriage out of situation, out of compromise that since anywayz he never had his love with him, he will adjust with whom his mom had got him married !!! Now with Anita back, he just does not care about anything else and can only think about the time they were together, love shared between them & the lost opportunity of always being together !!! How else can he justify his anger ??? It perfectly shows what he feels or felt for Gopi has no hold on his heart other than these feelings were created because a man & women stayed together ...it shows that Anita will & always be his love & no one can take her place or will ever reach upto what he feels for her !!!

When Gopi will start to see these changes in him, she will be hurt not because he is still in love with Anita but because he had led her on to a false promise of his love for her, for being always there for her, for becoming her support, for fighting for her attention & her love when deep down he still loved only Anita !!!

Fine if we say with Anita around Ahem will realise how much he loves Gopi...well my take is why do you need a third person to tell you how much you love another person? If he loves Anita thats period...if he loves Gopi that is period...he knows his heart, his knows his feelings, he knows what happens to him when she is around so why do you need another person to make you realise if you love one person or not??? Love is between two people & they need to realise between themselves on what the other person means to him or her !!! They do not need someone else to make them realise how much one loves his or her partner !!! It then clearly shows that Ahem is evaluating both the women on the who is good & comparing each other's qualities & the deciding who do you want to stay with !!! If Ahem decides on Gopi now even after the strong feelings which Anita has evoked in him, it clearly shows that he has compared both the women & then decided to stay with Gopi, if he decides to do so !!!

Well Ahem knows both Anita & Gopi but he also knows how much his family especially his mom loves her Vahu & since separting is out of question & he also knows Gopi adores him ... and since his family will not accept his decision of moving out will he stay back with Gopi ???

Ahem knows & values the institution of marriage so maybe because now he is married to Gopi will he stay back with her !!! When Gopi knows about Ahem's feeling for Anita, she will decide to sacrifice her love, her husband to his love so that he can have his love in his life...so will Ahem be touched by this instance & then decide to stay married to his wife !!! or will his ego not allow her to leave him !!!

All in all it clearly shows for Ahem, Gopi does not matter to him ! He still loves & cares about Anita, his love & that she still holds his heart because if he did not then he would have not been so effected by Anita's decision of moving forward in life ...when all he has done was move forward in his life & accept his marriage !!! If not he would have been fine with Anita moving forward in life because he is happy in his life with Gopi as he loves her dearly & just wants to share his life with her & none else !!!

The next question that comes is why is Gopi giving up on her marriage when Anita is back...why should she stay is my question !!! Has Ahem ever sat down with her & explained what he feels for her ...has he ever told her what she means to him & how much he loves her , has he made her feel special to tell her what he feels for her...No... even at the start of their marriage he did not even talk to her on why he was distant to her & allowed her to assume things...we might say he has expressed his feelings in his behaviour with her allowing her to see the change in him but coming from how their marriage was how much can she assume !!! All she can understand is that her Ahemji has changed on how he reacts to her & he no more gets mad at her & has made some space for her in his life !!! Now with his past love back & seeing how much he is effected by her, all she can deduce is that even till date her Ahemji loves Anita & that she has come in between them...she will be more hurt because somewhere his changed behavior has started to build hopes in her that her husband finally loves her & she can also expect happiness from her marriage !!! Even if he does make a choice of staying married to her, she will always have this doubt in her that her husband has compromised & made a choice of staying with her maybe due to family , or due to situation or due to something else but not because he loves her !!!

So after all this does Ahem really deserve the deep love & dedication his wife has for him...no he does not...he does not deserve even an ounce of love Gopi has for him !!! Gopi maybe initially be very hurt when she moves away from him but in life, she will be happy without him as every moment if she is going to be with him will remind her about the compromise & adjustments her husband has made in his life to be with her !!! Even now if Ahem declares his undying love for her, it will not heal her heart of the pain & suffering she is undergoing & she will always be insecure about his love for her !!! Her strength & belief in their love, in their relationship & in him has been effected so much after Holi that now it will take her very very very long to actually believe that her husband really & truly loves her, if he does !!!

My long rant on how Gopi is suffering for the choices Ahem made in his life !!!

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Vidisha

@Veni-Vidi-Vici

Sparkler

+ 2

Posted: 13 years ago

You have summed up Gopi's situation very well. The dices were loaded against her favour right inthe beginning 👏

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FlowerHater

@FlowerHater

Sparkler

+ 6

Posted: 13 years ago

👍🏼Bang on navya!!!!! luv u!!!!!!!! these are for u 👏!!!!! u spoke my heart out!!!!!

Go on gopi leave this confused modi for the tie being!!!!!

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Parijatrocks

@Peacefulmind

Trailblazer

+ 5

Posted: 13 years ago

really its a question raising whether he loved gopi ever...

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Tahira

@tamzin43

Voyager

Posted: 13 years ago

brilliant as always navyab .. i,m really hating this track of anita returning😭😭😭😭😭

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prevas12

@prevas12

Navigator

Posted: 13 years ago

It was a good post by I think differently . I was also thinking when I saw the episode on Friday that Ahem is confused and jealous when he saw Anita moving on with her life. But I now feel that Ahem reacted that way to vent out his frustration and he probably had started hating Anita for what happened to Kinjal. After reading the other posts I also feel that he tore the picture to put a complete end to his past. .. I think people are just getting carried away by the spoiler. Anita's marriage will not be called off nor would she come and stay in MM . I feel Ahem and Gopi will attend the wedding and when Gopi gets to know that it is Anita 's wedding she will talk to Ahem to console him . But Ahem then would tell her that Anita does not make difference to him and all he wants is Gopi and her love...

Ahem is very clear in his mind that he loves Gopi and needs her . There is definetely no confusion in his mind else he would have not torn the photo in to pieces...

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ruchisahay

@ruchisahay

Navigator

+ 2

Posted: 13 years ago

Well, I too think differently.

I guess we all are over-reacting (me included) because we have, for a very long time, cheered every little step Ahem has taken to get closer to Gopi. But, even before Anita came, their relationship was far from perfect. We saw during separation track that Ahem cares a lot for Gopi, comforts her, shares his happiness and memories but DOES NOT SHARE HIS PAIN.

My guess is that is what is happening now. He's is pain - he just got an emotional jhatka and is still to get over it. There would be guilt, regret and maybe a little love too (you can't really become completely indifferent to somebody who really mattered). This does not necessariy mean that he does not love Gopi. If the male title tracks are anything to go by - he does.

But he needs to see past his pain, and try to understand Anita's presence will affect Gopi. And for once, he should communicate. Otherwise, Gopi leaving MM seems to be the ony solution - that might help him become less self-centred and more open and help him understand the love he already feels.

Hope I make sense.

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Savi_S

@Savi_S

Voyager

Posted: 13 years ago

You have written gopis pain very effectively that it pained me to imagine her pain if something like this happen but i truly believe that ahem loves gopi and only gopi. I have no second thoughts about it n if that was not so why he start supporting her, understanding her, trusting her. He should have been the same ahem as in first year why so much changes in his attitude? Adjustment doesnt change your attitude to that extent (as in case of ahem) towards someone u be the same what u are. I think we are just taken away by gopis pain and we are not once thinking about ahems pain whose life was moving very smoothly and has suddenly taken a u turn with the arrival of his past in front of him. He is not able to control and judge himself and due to his shy and temper personality will not share it and will be angry without any reason. He needs time to settle down and strengthen himself and get out himself from the pool of guilty of leaving anita without any proper reasoning.

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ANJ4

@ANJ4

Rocker

+ 2

Posted: 13 years ago

Very good post , poor gopi always get the short end of the stick , I also feel it is gopi against the world ... I reality she is always alone. not even her MIL is with her always ...

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Gohem83

@Gohem83

Beginner

Posted: 13 years ago

#10

Ur post has verbalised exactly what I was thinking, brilliant analysis. I think Gopi should go to an Ashram get some peace and make MM realise what a gem they truly had. I have no words regarding Ahem only that I want to see an incredibly long track on him working to get Gopi back... I think 1.5years would be about right!

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My Tangential take on Ahem !!!

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