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| Dheer speaks frantically into the phone, "My wife is pregnant, and her contractions are only two minutes apart!" "Is this her first child?" the doctor queries. "No, you idiot!" Dheer shouts. "This is her husband!" Doctor: I have some bad news and some very bad news. Dheer : Well, might as well give me the bad news first. Doctor: The lab called with your test results. They said you have 24 hours to live. dheer : 24 HOURS! That's terrible!! WHAT could be WORSE? What's the very bad news? Doctor: I've been trying to reach you since yesterday. "Doctor, doctor, will I be able to play the violin after the operation?" asks dheer "Yes, of course..." "Great! I never could before!" dheer goes to the eye doctor. The receptionist asks him why he is there. dheer complains, "I keep seeing spots in front of my eyes." The receptionist asks, "Have you ever seen a doctor?" Dheer replies, "No, just spots." Dheer approaches a very beautiful woman in a large supermarket and asks, Dheer had just settled into his seat next to the window on the plane when another man sat down in the aisle seat and put his black Labrador Retriever in the middle seat next to the man. Dheer looks very quizzically at the dog and asks why the dog is allowed on the plane. The second man explained that he is a DEA agent and the dog is a "sniffing dog". His name is Sniffer and he's the best there is. I'll show you once we get airborne, when I put him to work." The plane takes off, and once it has leveled out, the agent says "Watch this. He tells Sniffer to "search". Sniffer jumps down, walks along the aisle, and finally sits very purposefully next to a woman for a several seconds. Sniffer then returns to its seat and puts one paw on the agent's arm. The agent says, "Good boy", and he turns to Dheer and says: That woman is in possession of marijuana, so I 'm making a note of her seat number and the authorities will apprehend her when we land." "Say, that's pretty neat" replies Dheer. Once again, the agent sends Sniffer to search the aisles. The Lab sniffs about, sits down beside a man for a few seconds, returns to its seat, and this time, he places TWO paws on the agent's arm. The agent says, "That man is carrying cocaine, so again, I m making a note of his seat number for the police." "I like it!" says Dheer. The agent then told Sniffer to "search" again. Sniffer walked up and down the aisles for a little while,sat down for a moment, and then came racing back to the agent, jumped into the middle seat and proceeded to poop all over the place. Dheer is really grossed out by this behavior and can't figure out how or why a well-trained dog would act like that, so he asks the agent, "What's going on?" The agent nervously replied, "He just found a bomb!" |
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