Posted:
While I appreciate the writers of the show wanting to bring positivity into it after days of sadness, I feel like in the apology and the aftermath, the root cause of why things happened were never explored.
The men in the house acknowledged that they had misunderstood Toasty, felt genuinely guilty and went to bring her back - but noone really thought about what led to the situation. I guess we did see Pashu think about his anger and attitude being an issue, noone focused on what the problem in the household was in the first place. I think Tej does at some level - and has realized that if the house remains the way it is, there is bound to be more issues in the future.
The root cause of why I think women find it so hard in the house. While I appreciate Toasty genuinely being happy with all the responsibilities in the house, it was never fair how she was treated at every step - like her sole task was to keep everyone happy, not having any specific desires of her own - while constantly comparing her to their mother. I understand that sometimes the comparisons were for good reasons, however I still think that's unnecessary. Why not appreciate her just for who she is as an individual. Why make her give up her individuality (including her job)? Why not think about the fact that she likely has some dreams and desires too?
I particularly felt irritated when the brothers came home without Toasty and the first thing the dad says is "I don't understand girls these days" and started his jaap of his wife again? Makes me wonder if he ever allowed his wife to have any opinions or be her own person either.
I really hoped that through this story, at some level the dad in particular would realize that there are things he does in the way he runs his household that is not conducive to his sons having a partner and their own independent life (Here I am not saying that the sons should move out but that they and their spouse should be allowed to have dreams of their own while caring for the family at the same time - a life outside of just the house). In addition, I had hoped he would realize that the way to run a household is not always his way - i.e. "lets vote on this". As Sudha rightly said, are they running a government or is it a family? While they admit that the vote was wrong, noone admitted that the way they went about it was incorrect in the first place.
Even if Toasty were to go back, granted they feel apologetic and genuinely care for her, I don't see a modern girl being truly satisfied in that house. I love my family and don't see anything wrong with being dedicated to your in-laws, don't get me wrong. But it's disappointing when a girl leaving everything and just being happy with that is seen as the ideal.
Ye Hai Mohabbatein
