What is the problem if someone wants to be homemaker?

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desiseriesfan

@desiseriesfan

Voyager

Posted: 7 years ago

The subject folder can not contain many words so I couldn't give credit to Foresight, Poppinss and 111192.

Open question to all the people, what is the problem if some girl wants to be homemaker?

This issue arose because main lead of the show, Diya wants to be a homemaker(actually she didn't said anything like that but till now she is doing what a newly wed bride do and no one in the in-laws said that she can not do job ) So lets give some brief about Diya.

Diya(30 yeae old) is a warrior and was a bodyguard of Ratan Maan SIgh(21 year old), son of Datahukum Maan Singh and Padma Maan SIngh. 12 years ago she promised Maan Singh that she will protect Ratan till her last breath and hand over all the property to Ratan when he would be capable enough to handle them.She gave her ring back to Abhay whom she was engegd to. 12 years later Rataan came back completing his studies and his family members tried to kill him for his property but Diya like a warrior saved him. Diya gradually became Ratan's best friends and both had to suffer a lot for their friendship. Diya sacrificed her love to catch the person who wanted to kill Ratan. When the attacker got caught Diya bid adieu to Ratan and gave him a box which contained a letter. The letter was wrote by Maan SIngh where he said Ratan to get Diya married with a good man and if he failed to do that he must marry Diya. Diya got many job offers from many hotels but she didn't accepted those jobs because she gave her 12 years to fulfill her duty but couldn't fulfill daughters duty which she wants to do than. When she entered her home her father didn't accept her. On the other hand Ratan went to Diya's ex lover Abhay, and somehow made him agreed about the wedding. Ratan went to Diya's house and told them that Abhay wanted to marry her and her father became happy and accepted her. Ratan tried to make Diya's wedding grand and perfect but ended up doing continuous mistake because of his childishness. Before the wedding day Diya and Ratan had a huge fight in a pub where Diya said Ratan useless, irresponsible etc. and Ratan said to Diya egoistic, old fashioned, selfish(how can he say that to her) etc .Ratan also said her that he will not attend her wedding. But he did attend her wedding anyhow and found out that Abhay ditched her. Diya's father said many earful things to Ratan and fainted. Ratan didn't thought for a second and filled Diya's maang with sindoor. After that Diya's father gained consciousness(😡) and told Diya to marry him. Everyone including Diya told Ratan not to marry but he married Diya kind of forcefully. Now Ratan is frustrated because he is married to Diya and she is also aware about his feelings. Diya is not saying a anything to Ratan but he is always yelling at her and thinks it is all her fault. Diya is silent doing all the rasam which a newly wed Royal couple had to do but all things are going wrong at the end.

This what the story is. Hope I didn't missed any major thing(escaped many things to keep itabridged).

There was an episode where Yash Banah said to Ratan that Diya always wanted to have a husband who would love her a lot and every morning she wanted to cook food for his hubby and would give him lunch to his office. Now again I want to ask, if a girl wants to be homemaker what is the problem?

Edited by nancy505 - 7 years ago

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foresight

@foresight

Sparkler

+ 3

Posted: 7 years ago

No problem at all. Every girl has a right to choose what she wants to be and what she wants to do with her life. Being a homemaker is as challenging as being a career oriented woman. And as long as the girl does it based on her own prerogative, i respect woman choosing either of those options.

And that is the view of most of the strong woman across the world not just in India. that it is okay as long as it is the woman's choice.

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poppinss

@poppinss

Rocker

Posted: 7 years ago

Nothing wrong at all. But homemaker should not be stereotyped with timid and adjustable by nature.

From an ITV perspective all homemakers are stereotyped in such a way. But, this is not always so in life.

Also it need not be women who need to be homemakers... Men can be too. However, the term is almost always linked with women.

Edited by poppinss - 7 years ago

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C0raline

@C0raline

Voyager

Posted: 7 years ago

Nancy,

I do not think the problem is with being a homemaker. Women tend to say when they are homemakers that "I do not work". I always end up saying "you mean, not outside home?, because you do work, maybe a lot!" :-D

I also believe that women are treated in the secondary fashion is because we treat housework as something inferior. But that is not the point.

I do not feel Diya wanting to be a homemaker is a problem. (To be fair, I WILL prefer a few Female leads on Indian TV who have shorter hair, wear western cloths and work in a professional environment, because most such characters are shown as vamps or grey.)

There is a huge difference between being a homemaker and being a doormat. The problem a lot of us have, are with the tilt of Diya's character towards being a pushover and doormat.

I know a few very strong women who were homemakers and also know a few who worked outside but had no rights to spend even a dime of their earnings without explicit permission of their in-laws and husbands.

I feel the problem started (I DO feel there is a significant tonal shift in the writing), when the Zee TV serials with a significant age gap started showing.

I saw a couple of episodes and realized that suddenly Ratan was lot more immature than his earlier characterization. Suddenly Diya was lot more submissive and accepting. (This is lot closer to the characterization of other show.)

I sincerely believe that initial characterization of Diya and Ratan still had the potential to show conflict but ITV needs conflict which involve Melodrama.

The way the show was initially written, the melodrama part was almost absent. Ratan and Diya's case is more realistic but the conflict will be lot more subtle. (In real life, at least)

I do feel there is a clear inconsistency in shaping the lead's characters. I am saying inconsistency because a lot of social situations and other characters seem to be still written well.

And still once in a while, you end up getting a scene which shines through.

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desiseriesfan

@desiseriesfan

Voyager

Posted: 7 years ago

Originally posted by: C0raline
Nancy,

I do not think the problem is with being a homemaker. Women tend to say when they are homemakers that "I do not work". I always end up saying "you mean, not outside home?, because you do work, maybe a lot!" :-D

I also believe that women are treated in the secondary fashion is because we treat housework as something inferior. But that is not the point.

I do not feel Diya wanting to be a homemaker is a problem. (To be fair, I WILL prefer a few Female leads on Indian TV who have shorter hair, wear western cloths and work in a professional environment, because most such characters are shown as vamps or grey.)

There is a huge difference between being a homemaker and being a doormat. The problem a lot of us have, are with the tilt of Diya's character towards being a pushover and doormat.

I know a few very strong women who were homemakers and also know a few who worked outside but had no rights to spend even a dime of their earnings without explicit permission of their in-laws and husbands.

I feel the problem started (I DO feel there is a significant tonal shift in the writing), when the Zee TV serials with a significant age gap started showing.

I saw a couple of episodes and realized that suddenly Ratan was lot more immature than his earlier characterization. Suddenly Diya was lot more submissive and accepting. (This is lot closer to the characterization of other show.)

I sincerely believe that initial characterization of Diya and Ratan still had the potential to show conflict but ITV needs conflict which involve Melodrama.

The way the show was initially written, the melodrama part was almost absent. Ratan and Diya's case is more realistic but the conflict will be lot more subtle. (In real life, at least)

I do feel there is a clear inconsistency in shaping the lead's characters. I am saying inconsistency because a lot of social situations and other characters seem to be still written well.

And still once in a while, you end up getting a scene which shines through.

Agree with you, and yes I can understand what area you saying. As you said they are doing this to make stretch the story and TRP. It is working I think besause these days it has been ranked as most viewed show in UK.

When Ratan was so caring towards Diya the shows rating dropped . So they are showing the angry young man more angry.

I also freaked out yesterday after watching the episode, believe me I have never hated any main lead this much sorry I have, Ted in HIMYM but that is another topic..

Have you watched Kuch Rang Hai Pyaaar Kya Aide Bhi? I as not that kind of fan of that serial but I think you will like it cause the heroin was so modern and powerful lead. But as always couldn't grab decent TRP. It ranked no 1 in IF during on-air. Good serial.

Edited by nancy505 - 7 years ago

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C0raline

@C0raline

Voyager

Posted: 7 years ago

Originally posted by: nancy505

Agree with you, and yes I can understand what area you saying. As you said they are doing this to make stretch the story and TRP. It is working I think besause these days it has been ranked as most viewed show in UK.
When Ratan was so caring towards Diya the shows rating dropped . So they are showing the angry young man more angry.
I also freaked out yesterday after watching the episode, believe me I have never hated any main lead this much sorry I have, Ted in HIMYM but that is another topic..
Have you watched Kuch Rang Hai Pyaaar Kya Aide Bhi? I as not that kind of fan of that serial but I think you will like it cause the heroin was so modern and powerful lead. But as always couldn't grab decent TRP. It ranked no 1 in IF during on-air. Good serial.

Nancy,

A friend of mine is a Researcher and as a part of one of her social science research she did some work on the viewer ship patterns of the Indian TV serials.

She said in interesting thing. The maximum viewer ship for family slot comes from a section of women who do feel (In reality they can be or perceive themselves to be so) neglected or under appreciated in their family or social lives.

So they end up empathising with "Bechaari" heroines more. The Male lead being shown and understanding and the in-laws shown as appreciative does not validate their feelings of neglect.

So you will see that the shows where women are shown to be at the receiving end of a lot of problems tend to get popular. A Male lead who is suspicious or trusts his parents, sisters more or mistreats (in different manner) seems to be a representation of their (real or perceived) life than an understanding, supportive one.

Sadly, the generation and strata which has different experience end up watching a different kind of TV and thus are not a prime viewer for such shows.

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desiseriesfan

@desiseriesfan

Voyager

Posted: 7 years ago

Originally posted by: C0raline

Nancy,

A friend of mine is a Researcher and as a part of one of her social science research she did some work on the viewer ship patterns of the Indian TV serials.

She said in interesting thing. The maximum viewer ship for family slot comes from a section of women who do feel (In reality they can be or perceive themselves to be so) neglected or under appreciated in their family or social lives.

So they end up empathising with "Bechaari" heroines more. The Male lead being shown and understanding and the in-laws shown as appreciative does not validate their feelings of neglect.

So you will see that the shows where women are shown to be at the receiving end of a lot of problems tend to get popular. A Male lead who is suspicious or trusts his parents, sisters more or mistreats (in different manner) seems to be a representation of their (real or perceived) life than an understanding, supportive one.

Sadly, the generation and strata which has different experience end up watching a different kind of TV and thus are not a prime viewer for such shows.

Thats what I don't understand. It is 21st century right, why people can still like this kind of thing? Not only about RLHN but also about all those series.

These days people are more attracted to TV series or netflix than movies you have to agree with that. But comparing with other countries these days even if you watch hindi movies they have really lost their charm. Even in hollywood after watching transformers 5 I felt like I have seen high budgeted crap movie. Who will say he directed the secret solider of Bengazi. Like 13 hours very few movies is seen this days.

What I want to say is on an average every entertainment industry is producing masala movie these days, why blaming ITV.

As I said earlier I really don't understand how all over the world peoples taste has been reduced.

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C0raline

@C0raline

Voyager

Posted: 7 years ago

Originally posted by: nancy505

Thats what I don't understand. It is 21st century right, why people can still like this kind of thing? Not only about RLHN but also about all those series.

These days people are more attracted to TV series or netflix than movies you have to agree with that. But comparing with other countries these days even if you watch hindi movies they have really lost their charm. Even in hollywood after watching transformers 5 I felt like I have seen high budgeted crap movie. Who will say he directed the secret solider of Bengazi. Like 13 hours very few movies is seen this days.
What I want to say is on an average every entertainment industry is producing masala movie these days, why blaming ITV.
As I said earlier I really don't understand how all over the world peoples taste has been reduced.

You are asking a very interesting question and it covers more than just TV or films or art. It is a tragedy of almost everything. Celebration of mediocrity.

There is a beautiful dialogue in one of my favourite films. It is from a film called Sarfarosh. And character of Naseeruddin Shah says it.

"Ye Shayari me tasavoor ke kangaali ka daur hai" (Meaning : This is the era of lack of imagination (literal meaning is dreams) in poetry")

I sometimes feel that about a lot of aspects of life. "Tasavoor ke kangaali ka daur"

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Mehek25

@Mehek25

Sparkler

+ 2

Posted: 7 years ago

Wonderful post.
And no being a homemaker is no problem. In fact it is a very challenging job in itself. And Diya is perfectly capable of balancing both home and the hotel etc.

Here it is just a clash between Diya's maturity and Ratan's immaturity. Not only because of the age difference but Diya had to take on Ratan's responsibility from the time she herself was 18. That itself matured her way too quickly.

Once Ratan begins to realise this and experience responsibility I'm sure his attitude will change also

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What is the problem if someone wants to be homemaker?

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