I always knew this moment ka pain belonged much much more to yuvi than to ashi ... but SHIT when I saw this scene again I realised how equally they both were getting hurt in this one ...
I mean...when he utters the last wackho waali line she is sooo taken away, she jus cant face him anymore...coz she knows her eyes wil betray her...or she herself might betray her and fall back into his arms and at tht moment she wants anything but that ... she turns away from him ( was I the one tht said tht priya's best performance was when she cries in soniya's arms ?? MAN I think I forgot what a brilliant actor priya is ... last time when I saw the pain, I saw yuvi ka side much much more prominenntly n obvio coz v had the yuvi-sid scene before tht so v knew ju what he was gonna lose ... this time I MADE it a point to see it from ashi's POV and I realised wit every performance she jus HITS ME 😭😭 ) ...
and she is hurting inside and not jus in pain...but in anger, in disbelief ... at the fact tht he betrayed her trust ... but even then, she doesnt fail to acknowledge the fact tht yes, he does love her and he has really fallen in love wit her ... all her pain, did NOT blind her to see this obvious a truth...soo soo obvious in his eyes...DAMN how cud she do this ??? kahaan se aati hain itni strength yaar ... its not not soo not easy to see this truth in somebody's eyes esp in the eyes of the person who had betrayed u once..u almost immediately BEGIN to form a bias of distrusting tht person...or rather not believing him or his feelings again ... but she jus cudnt do it...coz she had to admit the truth ... yuvi's pain..his love..was written in his eyes...in his every word...his every breath ...
and this truth in a way made it easier for her to remain friends wit him ... because she knew tht he had loved her once truely ... and ofcourse the mere fact of not remaining friends wit him ... of making him a complete stranger ... pained her even more than staying away from him ... and the way she says na "tum hurt ho rahe ho yuvi...I kno it, I jus kno it.." it was like ALL in tht moment she jus wanted to make HIS pain go away ... thats ALL she wanted to do...but immediately in the next moment she remembers what he has done and says "but for once...main tumhare nahin, apne baare mein sochna chahti hoon..." and it hurts her even to admit it to herself for being so selfish in tht moment ... toh admiting it to him ... but she had to do it ... "..main tumhe mujhe hurt karne ka chance hi nahi dena chahti...main dobara apni life kisi aur ke hawale nahin karna chahti.." the way she says this na...its almost a silent promise to herself more than to yuvi...its a way to bring back HER inner strength ... yes, she might hav revived some of it all thru these days but then yuvi's midnight picnic changed it all for her .. and she jus NEEDED her strength back...coz without tht, she cudnt b herself...and if she cudnt b herself then she cudnt face life ...
and even after ALLL this pain..this hurt..this anger towards him.. after ALL those lies tht he spoke...now wher...jus NO WHER in her heart cud she find a place for hatred .... coz he jus didnt deserve it...yes, she wud b angry wit him ... she wud shout at him..she wud b pained coz of him...but never in her wildest imaginations even wud she hate him ... he was too much a part of her life ... a part of her own soul ... and if anything, she says "I m sorry" .. and DAMN IT !! those are her last words as she leaves tht room...she is sorry for hurting HIM ... she is sorry for not going back to HIM ... DAMN IT .. DAMN IT ... jus how can a person b soo soo SELFLESS ... I mean, I cant even BEGIN to describe what tht one "I m sorry" from her side meant ...