A Spark
He was unnaturally still. But that wasn't what bothered her-- Rudra could give a statue lessons in immobility-- it was the quality of his silence. He stood rigidly near the window, the watery moonlight throwing his features into sharp relief.
Over the months, she had learned to read his moods. She knew his rage-- when it would take on a vitriolic quality and hurt her most-- both verbally and physically. She could sense his fits of bitter despair when he forgot about the world and self-loathing overwhelmed him. She even understood the strange black sarcasm that Rudra aimed at his father, and which his Bapu Sa returned in full measure. It was a crude veneer to mask the affection and bond that went far too deep to express in empty words of kindness.
This particular silence however, unnerved her. He'd been edgy for a couple of weeks. Today, he was shuttered-- like she'd never seen him before.
Paro edged closer with a glass of water in her hand, eyeing him warily all the while. Was this the calm before the storm? He'd been well-behaved for a couple of months now. He largely ignored her, but she regularly found the large steel jars full of ghee, atta, sugar, pulses, besan, and nuts; along with a small jerrycan of kerosene, and a basket of fresh vegetables. After the first month, she'd also occasionally found a bar of soap, a small dabba of talcum powder, or a bottle of hair oil among the groceries.
The Lord-who-shared-his-name alone knew what was going through his convoluted mind. Were they back to square one?
While Paro had travelled a million miles in her mind, she hadn't noticed when Rudra had covered the remaining steps between them and come to stand right in front of her. She jerked back to attention, spilling some of the water as Rudra took the tumbler out of her hands and put it down on the table close by.
He stared at her wordlessly for so long, that she shifted uncomfortably under the intensity of his gaze.
Just when she'd decided to turn away, a low whisper skittered around the massive room.
"What would you do if you found out that the very beliefs you'd built your life on were false?"
Paro gaped at him. Without waiting for an answer, he continued.
"What would you do if the people you held dear were proved, beyond doubt, to be liars? If what you'd hated with a passion had been blameless? What would you do, Parvati?"
The shock of him using her full name brought the answer to her lips before she could stop it.
"The evidence would have to be damning."
"It is. It is."
As Rudra bowed his head in what looked suspiciously like defeat, a wild worry began clawing at her stomach.
And what worried her were not the questions, but that she couldn't tell whom they were directed at-- her or himself?
Ye Hai Mohabbatein
