Rakshaskul Team Contest!

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Mallika113

@Mallika113

Sparkler

+ 3

Posted: 16 years ago

#171

We are all waiting for the judges' scores with bated breaths and much excitement! Who is going to win this round? Is it going to be betashri or kakashri?!! There is so much suspense in the air and I don't know if I can wait anymore!😊

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Vibhishna

@Vibhishna

Dazzler

+ 3

Posted: 16 years ago

#172

Hey, no problem at all Aiswarya. We all worked for it. Thank you for the beautiful presentation. I have made a few corrections. If this cannot be considered, the original post is also fine. The poem portrays Vibhishan's words of grief for his brother's death.

Thanks again Aiswarya.

Originally posted by: MusicalAiswarya

A small message to Vibhishna: I'm sorry I couldn't consult you first about posting this, but the deadline was just coming too quickly 😳 One more thing, all the credit goes to Vibhishna for this one! 👏

This poem is also from Vibhishan's point of view

Here is Team Kumbhakarn's Entry:

Brother . . .

I remember the times we spent together when we walked the earth hand in hand,
The same arms that had held my hand fell before my eyes to the sand.
I remember the times when you looked after me with your lips curved in a smile,
The same eyes that saw you smile hath now seen you die.

I remember, brother, your brave laughter whenever you faced a foe,
I remember the strength and might when you dealt your enemies with a blow.
I remember, brother, your humility in spite of your gigantic frame,
I remember your thoughts of justice to be ever fair in game.

I remember, brother, your happy face when you brought home your blushing bride,
I remember the ecstatic smile when your sons were born - a father's pride.
I remember, brother, your hearty wishes when my marriage was done,
I remember your gay laughter when my daughter played with your son.

With deep sigh I turn away from the spot your carcass lay,
With my head towards heaven I sincerely pray,
"If only time could give us another chance to be together
I wish to be born again as your younger brother."

Edited by Vibhishna - 16 years ago

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Mahi

@-Mystery-

Stunner

+ 6

Posted: 16 years ago

#173

Hey guys,

You all are just fantastic! I am really happy with the kind of effort you put in all of these tasks, it shows!

Great job and keep it up! Your entries make me a lot more knowledgeable of Ramayan! So thank you so much for that!

Now time for the scores. The poems are judged to the best of my ability.

Team Indrajit - 8.5
Comments - I was reading the description of the Task and it wanted a very sentimental poem. Something that you make you cry. Although the poem is well written, I thought some lines brought in a bit of a humorous tangent. But most lines were emotional and really touched your heart. The poem was well written!

Team Kumbhakarn - 10
Comments - Superb!! This was a brilliant entry! I could really feel the pain of losing him. This was a brilliant attempt!

-Mahi

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Vibhishna

@Vibhishna

Dazzler

+ 3

Posted: 16 years ago

#174

Originally posted by: Mallika113

Judges, this is our edited entry with a minor adjustment! Not a big change, the original one is fine too!

Wow! Good job Team Indrajeet!!!

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Vibhishna

@Vibhishna

Dazzler

+ 3

Posted: 16 years ago

#175

Originally posted by: -Mystery-
Hey guys,

You all are just fantastic! I am really happy with the kind of effort you put in all of these tasks, it shows!

Great job and keep it up! Your entries make me a lot more knowledgeable of Ramayan! So thank you so much for that!

Now time for the scores. The poems are judged to the best of my ability.

Team Indrajit - 8.5
Comments - I was reading the description of the Task and it wanted a very sentimental poem. Something that you make you cry. Although the poem is well written, I thought some lines brought in a bit of a humorous tangent. But most lines were emotional and really touched your heart. The poem was well written!

Team Kumbhakarn - 10
Comments - Superb!! This was a brilliant entry! I could really feel the pain of losing him. This was a brilliant attempt!

-Mahi

Thank you very much for taking time to judge the poems. All the comments and encouragement helps us to perform better and bring out the hidden talents.

Thank you.

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Jiya

@-Jiya-

Inactive

+ 2

Posted: 16 years ago

#176

My opinion/points

Team indrajit

I LOVED your entry.. it brought smile on my face.. beautifully rhymed
but like mahi said.. it was suppose to be a sentimental poem..
i loved the last stanza.. specially the rhyming words "yagna - yudhya"

i would like to give you 9/10

Team kumbhkarna

WOW, i m speechless.. Very touchy poem.. I thought this would be one of the best
way to describe the relationship between the two brothers.. every line
describes the feeling b/t those two. Its like the their journey of life.

it deserves 10/10

- w/ love
Jiya

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Jiya

@-Jiya-

Inactive

+ 2

Posted: 16 years ago

#177

oh and buckle up both teams..😳
you guys are head to head with each other
all the very best for next task😆

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Aishwarya

@muffins2waffles

Inactive

+ 5

Posted: 16 years ago

#178

Originally posted by: -Mystery-
Hey guys,

You all are just fantastic! I am really happy with the kind of effort you put in all of these tasks, it shows!

Great job and keep it up! Your entries make me a lot more knowledgeable of Ramayan! So thank you so much for that!

Now time for the scores. The poems are judged to the best of my ability.

Team Indrajit - 8.5
Comments - I was reading the description of the Task and it wanted a very sentimental poem. Something that you make you cry. Although the poem is well written, I thought some lines brought in a bit of a humorous tangent. But most lines were emotional and really touched your heart. The poem was well written!

Team Kumbhakarn - 10
Comments - Superb!! This was a brilliant entry! I could really feel the pain of losing him. This was a brilliant attempt!

-Mahi

Wow! Thanks for the excellent comments! Both teams did really well!👏

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Aishwarya

@muffins2waffles

Inactive

+ 5

Posted: 16 years ago

#179

Originally posted by: JiyaPiya

My opinion/points

Team indrajit

I LOVED your entry.. it brought smile on my face.. beautifully rhymed
but like mahi said.. it was suppose to be a sentimental poem..
i loved the last stanza.. specially the rhyming words "yagna - yudhya"

i would like to give you 9/10

Team kumbhkarna

WOW, i m speechless.. Very touchy poem.. I thought this would be one of the best
way to describe the relationship between the two brothers.. every line
describes the feeling b/t those two. Its like the their journey of life.

it deserves 10/10

- w/ love
Jiya

Thanks so much Jiya! Your comments mean a lot! And I thank you for taking your time to judge😊

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Bhoot is inactive

@chatterbox

Trailblazer

+ 15

Posted: 16 years ago

#180

Originally posted by: desichica
OH dear Lord...Chatter di...ur right, we have to do something bout pitashri Ravan know...cuz he is showing many evil roops now *frightened by Rajnishes pics for Ravan*...so we better be alert.....I'm wondering if Pitashri or Betashri will have Maha Yudh too now🤣🤣 🤣* Challenge to Rajnish* ...i'm on team IJ in this club..lolz!!!!!!

😆

together we can and we will

ravan better be the judge who is better

bhratashri or betashri

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Rakshaskul Team Contest! - Page 18

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