Posted:
Sorry for the intense title guys. Feeling a little low. I have this guy I really liked... well what the hell.. I fell in love with him.
And silly me I decided to tell him. After hie left the country. Over a letter. That was 7 paragraphs long.
Anyway that's not the part that bothers me. We talked about it and things seemed to be ok between us. I gave him space and didn't try to talk to him too much. A few months later we happened to meet in Miami, as we were both going to University in North America: He in New York (state not city 😛) and me in Vancouver, Canada.
But ever since then, he's been ignoring me. I've brought it up maybe 5-6 times in the last 4 YEARS. And every single time his response is that I'm overreacting.
Finally after 4 years of my stupidity I decided enough was enough. And I stopped talking to him. I stopped trying. His excused were always that he was busy, or that I need to get a blackberry. Or that I need to adjust my perception of what a friend is like. All BULL. Because he always talked to m brother (weird, I know. My younger brother and this guy are still friends today. CLOSE friends.)
I even went to the point of deleting him off Facebook, Skype, etc. I know it's childish, but I tried to do the mature thing and still keep in touch. But I couldn't after that. Now it's gotten to the point where I have no desire to talk to him. I don't want to look at his profile. I don't want to get a message from him.
But two months ago... I did. And he was only mad that I had deleted him. I told him I didn't understand why he cared, since we never talked (hadn't talked in over 6 months at that point). But he just kept on with the same nonesense. So I just told him make no difference to me. You want this friendship to last? (who are we kidding it died ages ago, but he doesn't realize that) then you do somethign about it. I'm done. 4 years later, I'm done.
BUT BUT BUT BUT BUT BUT BUT
Then he asked about me again yesterday. And... I didn't know what to do. He was with my friend back home (Ecuador) and they sent me a pic of the two of them (she doesn't like him, she's my best friend, I trust her blindly, and she knows how I feel about him... or felt... or feel.. )
AND NOW I DON'T KNOW HOW I FEEL! Why the HELL do I still care??? Why do I let him get to me like this? And he has the nerve to say that HE'S upset that I deleted him. WHY DON'T YOU THINK ABOUT WHY I DID IT JACK**S??? Is it FAIR that when he ignores me I'm overreacting, but when I do it suddenly it's crime? It's offensive!? ARGH!
UGH.
Sorry guys.. I know this is random, and most of you probably won't read it all. I don't blame you. it's the ramblings of a Confused Ladki. 😔
Anupamaa
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