OS: Rishhton Ka Ilzaam..:Last ch. on p-78 - All rev./com. responded - Page 44

sshirley very interesting one,,,and wat to say always u making me to feel with ur words for love... You are right Dr. Ashutosh, I should not go back 5 years. But the fact is, I'm still standing where I was standing 5 years back, as far as my heart is concerned. I never moved on in that sense.

A heart is not a gift that you just pass on to someone.

i love the thing tat NIDHI s still ashu's nidhi aft the marriage too,tis will be very toughtest one

waiting for the next part sshirley

Chapter 2 Review

Shirley, the chapter is fantastic as far as the dialogs and emotions are considered. But even if I understand Nidhi's mental state as much as I do, I did find some things quite forced. It did not seem natural to me, just my POV. 😃

Well, it was shocking and inappropriate to see her forcibly pull such a senior doctor into the room. 😲 Owning to the fact that after 5 long years she has finally got her confirmation and she knows there was no other way Ashutosh would ever talk to her, I can see her point. But after that those photos, her confession that she has followed him everywhere just to get a glimpse of him and hear his voice, all that borders on obsession and even stalking, this part seemed a bit too much to me...

Even with all those questions and doubts 5 years back, I think what she felt was frustration, devastation, hopelessness and despair, but in my POV it is hard to believe she would actually stalk him in this manner! And to have done it for 5 years! She is older and bolder now, but that was not always so. I also concede that since she has never revealed herself till now, it is technically not stalking, but in her mind that was what she was doing...

So, when she knows for certain her love was not one-sided and felt it was time he knew the truth! Again that is why I can discount her pulling him into the room, because seeing and hearing him all evening she had probably guessed that unless and until she pushed him into a corner she would not be able to have to have that all important conversation, one that was already 5 years late!

And by hook or crook she has shown the photos, let him know the depth of her love and shocked him into confessing his. The next moment the tears, crying her heart out, this part is beautiful and its natural. Its as if a big burden has been lifted off her. For five long years she had closed herself off after that rejection wondering if she was capable of trusting her instincts, her judgment because the first major decision she took about her life, had ended in disaster, in a rejection. But now she finally knew that Ashutosh had rejected her out of fear, it was a knee-jerk reaction by him thinking that would save both of them from censure, it was because he loved her too and not because he did not love her... hence those tears, more like a relief. Its as if finally she knows what she had seen and understood from his demeanor and in his eyes was indeed correct. And what's more, she also knows now that like her he has not forgotten that love!

But what I felt forced was her falling on him and crying... What would have been natural was her just crying her heart out, a break down after bottling it up for 5 years, crying for her love, that she had finally got but it was 5 years late, for the life they could have had, had he not shunned it. At this point he should have been the one, shocked to witness the depth of her distress, to come forward and hug her, wipe her tears,almost as if he cannot help himself, cannot hold back after just learning that even she had loved him all along and it was not just a crush.

It was an emotionally weak moment for him too, not just for her! After all she is the woman he still loved and to see her literally falling apart, that should have been his reaction! But a few moments later moved back, as if suddenly recalling that she was married now. But then when he rushes and hugs her, she does not push him away, as if cherishing that embrace, almost a dream come true, till he himself moves away from her. To me that would have been more natural a reaction, again its purely my POV. 😊

The rest of the emotionally charged convo, his confession about when and where he started developing feelings for her, his own disgust at that, his attempts to salvage some sanity in that situation, her accusation that he had forced her into a life of suffering... all that is excellent! Very powerful, one can feel its intensity just reading it. Awesome! So, who calls him - Mallika?

Originally posted by: sshirley

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Mithee, wish her luck for studies on my behalf please

Originally posted by: Diksha_1991

we are ready 😉 😆

Originally posted by: shobsrocks

Edited by sshirley - 11 years ago

Just then, his phone rings, rudely jolting them back to the present. It takes both of them a few moments to regain composure and get their bearings.

Ashutosh: (Trying to sound normal) Hello?

Dr, Gabrielle: Hello Ashutosh, this is Bob. Are you already dressed for dinner? I'm waiting outside your room.

Ashutosh: (Surprised and confused) Outside my room? I am sorry..?

Dr. Gabrielle: I hope you remember you had asked me to come over to your room at 6:30? If it is not too much of trouble, I wanted your advice on a case.

Ashutosh: (recollecting his commitment) Oh .. Oh yes, Bob (Looking helplessly around Nidhi's room) I.. I'm terribly sorry. Could you please wait for me in the lounge? Actually got an important call and so got delayed. I will join u in the lounge in about 20 minutes.

Dr. Gabrielle: Oh, it's okay. Take your time Ashutosh. I am heading towards the lounge.

Ashutosh: (Relieved) Thanks. I will join you shortly.

5 minutes later, Ashutosh entered his room and heaved a sigh of relief. That had been close. Every time, he tried to dash out of her room, someone or the other passed the corridor. At last the coast was clear, and he had made a run for it. No sooner had he made a dart for his room, than he had come face to face with a couple of doctors. But thankfully, no one had noticed him coming out of her room. If anyone had, it would have been a very embarrassing situation for both of them.

What a blow fate had suddenly dealt on him! For five years, he had dreaded coming face to face with Nidhi. And what a way to meet her after all! Life does have strange ways. Today of all days, he had to talk about Nidhi during his speech, not knowing that she was a part of his audience! Just when Nidhi was around, he had to talk of his feelings to Armaan! He did not know whether to curse his fate or be thankful.

Just then, his glance went to the clock and he set aside his thoughts, before rushing to the restroom to get ready for dinner.

About 40 minutes later, he was in the hall, and socializing with his colleagues. Yet, he could not help glancing towards the door from time to time. He debated why he was looking towards the door? Was he dreading seeing her, did he look forward to seeing her, or was he just looking to confirm if their rendezvous, earlier that evening, had been for real?

However, all his thoughts vanished as he saw her enter the hall in the blue saree. Was it the same saree that she had visited his house for the first time in? The world suddenly ceased to exist around him. He could never forget the day! He had been down with viral, and suddenly the power had gone out, and the house was plunged into total darkness. Hiraman Kaka had been out, and he was alone. She had walked into the room with a candle in her hands - how symbolic that scene had been! She had brought light and hope into his dark, desolate life. And he? What had he done with her?! He drew in a sharp breadth, of regret!

By now, Nidhi had almost reached to where he was standing. Just then a female doctor stopped her.

Dr. Jennifer: (Extending her hand) Hello, I am Jenny. You from India?

Nidhi: (Nodding and shaking the extended hand) Yes, I am from India. I am Nidhi.

Dr. Jennifer: (Cheerfully) A pleasure to meet you Nidhi! And, that's a pretty attire you are wearing. It's called a Saree, right?

Nidhi: Yes, it is a Saree. But, how do you know? Been to India?

Dr. Jennifer: No, no such luck! But I have seen it on the net.

Nidhi: I see.

Dr. Jennifer: But the one I saw was too heavy.. too jazzy. This is really cool.

Nidhi: Thank you! (Looking at Ashutosh, who also reciprocates her glance) Actually, it's very special for me too.

Dr. Jennifer: (Smiling) But, of course Nidhi, you are so beautiful, that anything you wear..

Dr. Khanna (butting into the conversation) Oh yes, Dr. Jenny, she is so pretty. No wonder her hospital sent her to represent it. (Shrugging) I guess good for eye candy if not for anything else! I am sure, Dr. Nidhi, did u have some influence with the higher ups, am I right? (he winks at her)

Nidhi is shocked and enraged. But before she can respond, Ashutosh joins them. Dt. Jennifer senses some tension in the atmosphere and hastily excuses herself with an 'I'll see you later'.

Ashutosh: (In a deceptive calm even tone) What are you trying to say Dr. Khanna?

Arre - Arre nothing! Kuch nahi Dr. Ashutosh. I was just wondering you know? She is the juniormost doctor in such a high level conference, and an immensely good looking one at that. Her looks certainly have something to do..

Ashutosh: (Trying to control his rage) Dr. Khanna, let me remind you that even we were juniors at one point in our career. In fact, we should be proud that the juniormost doctor in this prestigious conference is from India, isn't it? (Dr. Khanna still looks at Nidhi mockingly) And let me clear some of your misconceptions. Even with her limited experience, she is quite a well known paedatrician of U.P. She completed her internship with distinction from the reputed City Centre Holy Hospital. Then she went on to pursue MD in Pediatrics, and cleared it with flying colors too. So, I guess, her hospital sent their finest doctor to this conference. In fact, I am sure, one day, she would be one of the most sought after paediatrician of India. Mark my words, Dr. Khanna!

By the time Ashutosh finished, Dr. Khanna is somewhat embarrassed and excuses himself. Nidhi stood rooted to her spot! The man who had once dismissed her from KGH was now standing up and vouching for her professional competence! Of course, she had suspected then that the reasons were personal, and her suspicions had been confirmed an hour back, but she never knew that he actually held her in such high esteem professionally. And she was all the more surprised that he had been keeping tabs on her all along.

Nidhi: Dr. Ashutosh, how do you know so much about me, my career?

Ashutosh: (Shifting uncomfortably on his feet) No.. I don't know much. Well. you see.. I,, I always knew you were a brilliant doctor, so most of it was pure conjecture, a calculated guess. And uh..

Nidhi: But, City Centre Holy Hospital, M.D. (Looking straight into his eyes) You kept tabs on me, right?

Ashutosh: (In a somewhat relieved tone) Yes, you could say, I kept myself informed about your career.

Nidhi: Hmm.. (Abruptly, with a smile) You know something? Almost immediately after I was dis.. I mean, after I left KGH, I got an offer from CCHH asking me, if I could join them as an intern immediately! I was so surprised!

Ashutosh: Really?

Ashutosh smiles genuinely and tries his best to feign surprise, but fails miserably. Nidhi immediately senses something and looks at him with a very serious expression.

Ashutosh: (Apprehensively) What happened? Why are you looking at me like that?

Nidhi does not reply and keeps looking searchingly in his eyes. Ashutosh tries to avert his gaze.

Nidhi: (Thinking aloud) Wait.. Dr. Ashutosh, did CCHH give me the offer because you..?

Ashutosh: (Abruptly interrupting her) NO. No ways Nidhi! I never recommended you.

Nidhi: (With a triumphant smile) Really? But I never said you recommended me, did I?

He looks at her helplessly, while she challenges with her eyes to refute the truth.

Ashutosh: (Awkwardly) Nidhi.. I .. you..

Nidhi: (With a slightly teasing smile) Yes, Dr. Ashutosh?

Just then Ashutosh spots a waiter and motions to him.

Ashutosh: (Taking soup from the tray, loudly enough) Shall we help ourselves to some soup Dr. Nidhi?

Nidhi nods a bit surprised, but takes the soup nevertheless. Ashutosh excuses himself and moves away from her, to socialize with the others.

Nidhi walks to a corner of the hall thinking of what she had just discovered. She did not even know what she should feel. It had been on an impulse that she had attacked him verbally at the coffee table earlier that day. After hearing his speech and his conversation over the phone with his friend, she had been plagued by the need to know the truth, the whole truth as why he had behaved so unjustly with her 5 years back. When the verbal assault at the coffee table did not work out, she again yielded to an impulse and pulled him inside her room on the spur of the moment, without thinking it through.

Although getting out of her room unnoticed had been a bit awkward for him, and gave them a few tense moments, she did not regret her action at all. Their conversation had been a revelation. All these years, she had been sure that he had never loved her. She had felt like a fool, all these years that she had convinced herself that he too had loved her just the way she had. She often cursed herself that she had not been able to get over a man, who had probably never even looked at her without criticizing eyes. She had resented the fact that she was nothing to him, while he meant a lot to him.

But after their conversation in her room, or rather after she had confronted him, she had been astonished to learn that he had loved her equally and suffered equally, if not more. Though initially she had been angry at his need to be self-sacrificing and also sacrificing her feelings in the bargain, she had to admit that the poor guy actually thought he was doing the right thing for her. She had resented that he snatched away her right to decide her own path in life, yet she had seen the depth of his love too today. After he had left the room, she had reflected on their conversation and had felt blessed indeed to be the recipient of such pure love.

While getting ready for the dinner, her heart had felt lighter than it had ever done in 5 years. And she was so glad that she had brought that particular saaree with her to the conference. Had she had a kind of premonition? Probably!

And now, she had come to know that he had been the one to recommend her to CCHH! That he had helped kickstarted her career, the career she was quite proud of. For a nanosecond, it did offend her self respect, but it was immediately overcome by a giddy feeling, when she thought of the enormity of his love. True, his misplaced altruism had been the cause of immense suffering to her, but wasn't that exactly what made him the Dr. Ashutosh? Her heart had been filled up such a warm feeling when he had pushed a Rs. 500 note into the hands of that tea vendor, after they had had their first tea while returning from Priyanka's wedding. Perhaps that had been the moment she had lost her heart to him! This had been his nature from the very beginning. She had probably fallen in love with him due to that. Agreed that this very nature had been the cause of so much pain to her, yet how could she begrudge him that.

Nidhi sighed. They had both suffered. More than enough actually! Maybe destiny had finally decided to smile at them. Maybe that's why they had met this way at this conference. May be they were after all, destined to be together! Maybe their love story too will still have a happy ending. May be they could still unite and live happily ever after!

She would talk to Rohan. She would explain that there was no point in continuing their marriage when she could not offer herself fully to him. Though ostensibly, they had a very normal married life, yet she had always kept something back. It was all unfair to him too. He deserved better. She would make him see reason. He would understand. He always did. After all, he had been her best friend for 3 years before they had gotten married. Thankfully, she had told him about her disappointed first love. Not the name of course, but he knew someone had broken her heart. After completing internship, her father and grand-aunt had wanted them to get married. She had joined MD partly to avoid the marriage hoping that she would forget Ashutosh in the two years breathing time she got. Finally, after her MD, there was no other excuse left. She did not wish to give Rohan the short end of the stick. But Rohan had argued that since they had to marry someone after all, why not each other? They were the best of friends, so at least that could serve as a basis for a good marriage. Reluctantly she had agreed and they had gotten married. They had shared a comfort level yet she had not reckoned about her guilt. She had wanted to surrender completely to him, yet she had failed to.

But, now an opportunity had presented itself and she was sure Rohan would agree with her that it was in the best interests of all three that she divorce him, and marry Ashutosh.

But would Ashutosh agree? She bit her lip nervously, as thought about it. Unfortunately yes, she had been touched by another man, her husband. But Ashutosh loved her way too much to hold that against her, didn't he? Yes, she nodded confidently to herself, he wouldn't even think of that aspect! She sighed again, God did exist after all! And now, she will actually LIVE her life fully, with her Ashutosh!

Having settled it all in her mind, she looked around the banquet hall, to see Ashutosh in an earnest discussion with a distinguished looking senior doctor. She admired him from a short distance. He was still the same proverbial tall, dark and handsome man at 47. Wait! She thought in wonder, was he 47 already? He certainly did not look like it! He had maintained himself quite well for his age.

As soon as she saw Ashutosh moving away from the doctor he was talking to, she walked towards him. Just then, an elderly doctor tapped Ashutosh's shoulder.

Dr. Kenneth: (Affectionately) Ashutosh, my boy! How are you doing? Been a long time!

Ashutosh: (Smiling warmly) Hello Dr. Kennedy, I am doing good. How about you?

Ashutosh: She is doing fine. Yes, she has a busy practice so..(shrug)

Dr. Kennedy: And how's the lil' one?

Ashutosh: He is doing great too, will start preschool this year.

Nidhi, who overheard the entire conversation, choked on her soup, and her eyes brim over. Since the soup had found its way into her wind pipe, she started coughing violently, creating a commotion.

Everyone rushed over to her side. Ashutosh gave her water, but she just looks at him painfully, not accepting the glass of water. She keeps coughing as tears continue to roll down her cheeks.

Not seeing any option, Ashutosh forces the glass to her lips.

Ashutosh: (Sternly, but in a whisper) Nidhi HAVE it.

She relents, stops coughing after having a few sips and hastily wipes her tears. Abruptly, she moves away from him, and after a minute or, inconspicuously leaves the banquet hall.

It took Ashutosh a while to figure out that Nidhi was not in the hall. He was also about to leave the hall, to go looking for her. But, another doctor accosted him, and he was forced to have dinner with him. But, he excused himself immediately after the dinner, and rushed to the reception. He dialed Nidhi's room on the intercom, but did not get any response.

He rushed to the elevators in a panic. How he wished, he had told her about Mallika and Amol! How he wished, she had not gotten to know about it like this!

He had reached her room door. Not knowing what to do, he looks around, and seeing no one in the corridor, knocks the door gently. But neither did she open the door, nor did hear any kind of sound. Now, he gets really worked up. Good God! Has she done something with herself?!

He deliberates with himself for a while - if he calls the reception to open the door, then unnecessary attention will be drawn. Also, the hotel staff may question how he is related to her and he didn't know how he was going to answer that. But finally, concern overrules caution. He rushes to his room so that he could use the intercom to call the reception. As soon as he enters the room, his gaze goes to the window and he sees a figure strolling in the lawns. On close scrutiny he realizes with immense relief that it's Nidhi.

He rushes outside to the lawns and reaches her by taking long strides. But he is confused how to begin the conversation, since she has ignored her presence even though she has seen him.

Ashutosh: (Uncertainly and in a hesitating tone) Dr. Nidhi, why did you leave the hall without having dinner?

Nidhi: I was not hungry (and she walks away).

Ashutosh: Nidhi..

But she just walks further away.

Ashutosh (catching up with her) Nidhi, I was going to tell you about my marriage to Malli..

Nidhi: (Angrily) What would you have told me? And why should I have any interest in your personal life? (In an undertone to herself) Dr. Mallika was right! Aakhir12 saal 12 second se jeet hi gaye!

Ashutosh: 12 kya?

Nidhi: (Walking away) Nothing

Ashutosh: (In a pleading tone) Please listen to me Nidhi.

Nidhi: WHY? Why should I listen?

Ashutosh: Nidhi, I got married to Mallika out of..

Nidhi: Dr. Ashutosh, I just want to ask you one question.

Ashutosh: Go ahead.

Nidhi - If you wanted to accept Dr. Mallika and marry her, why did you make her wait for so long?

Originally posted by: sshirley