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Sharon was sitting on her huge decorated sofa surrounded by rouge and golden pillows watching television in high volume. Her dad provoked his presence by his footsteps coming inside the living room. He asked her what she was watching , and she replied that it was a serial. He replied back in asking what is she saying due to the volume of the television , and therefore Sharon shouted over the volume that it is a serial. Suddenly a jolt of anger raised through her dad. He did not care if she shouted because of the high volume. All that registered was her shout.
"You sick low standard girl" , he said.
Sharon suddenly got the jolt she did over the years of all his insults , abuses on her character , on her identity and the belt and hanger beatings when she was a 13 year old girl . Because of his misunderstandings of what she used to say and want to claim. She got a sudden flash of a 13 year old girl with scratches and hanger marks on her face who was looking back at her bathroom mirror , trying to put make up on her face to cover the scars .Despite not knowing how to use it or rather what do with it . Another flash transitioned. Sharon walking within her classroom with a group of girls standing in a herd from a distance, laughing at her due to her uneven make up on her face which made some parts of her face , hiding the scars look like blotchy patches. However , now she was grown up. Yet , her dad had the ability to suddenly make her go through a chain of flashbacks within a mere flight of seconds. "Don't call me that" , she said in anger which was only on the surface
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He retorted back , "You are right. Low standard girls at least maintain a standard . You do not even have that."
She started shouting back in fits. And then he kept on pointing at her in bitter laughter on how she reacts. Just like "a low standard girl". He left when she told him to go. He retorted back, " I would not even breathe in the same place as you." She looked back at the TV trying to concentrate on the content. Increasing the volume even higher than before. So many years passed by and yet this man had the effect in making her feel the same way she did years back . God was wrong in saying that time heals all injuries. If only it did. She began blinking back tears , and began to erupt in hysterical bursts just like she did to his every single retort since childhood. It hurt that such a man had an effect on her cause she loved him and there was nothing she could do about it . She wished someone would hold onto her. Her mom used to come to her but she used to be shaken enough to tell her mom to leave her alone. If only anyone in the world understood that if she is alone like this for a mere second longer , she will fall. Because there is no one to hold her back. She went to her mom asking her to hug her , in a trembling voice. Her mom answered back , completely devoid in understanding her daughter's need , " Don't you always tell me to go?Then why do you need me? " . Sharon went running back from her mom sitting back into the couch while the same TV seemed to drain out the sound of her tears and voice - "If only there was someone to hold me back.Someone hold me back please."
Seher Hone Ko Hai
CID
