--Love Struck--SwaRon Story - Page 12

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--Rose-- thumbnail
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Posted: 13 years ago
Wowww Its FANTASTIC🤣:-) :-):-) jus Loved it:-):-):-) plz continune soon...
Satluvsd3 thumbnail
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Posted: 13 years ago
ok i res!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
unres
part 2!!!😃
wooww a very random and yet interesting part.
right from those normal days to one notice of swimming comp to the rise of swayam to win the runner-up title!!!
wowww great journey till then when the journey took an awsum route of Swimming comp!!
the whole Swimming comp was well written bhaiya!! ⭐️
i could experience the nervousness,tensed swayam!😉 then his smart strategies took him straight to the 1st position!!really smart of him!!👍🏼

ohh!!following Sharon's oppss miss famous's masterplan for the new God damn savior of colg!!😉
(BTW,great names 😆 )

the idea was very cheap but how smartly and ingeniously swayam handled the situation!!😃
ohhh so swayam's changed!!sad for the fact,the he has lost the TRUST on girls.looking fwd to next one.
KEEP WRITING!
part 3!!

i thoroughly enjoyed this part!!truly an entertaining one!so there's a high level of comp to be held between ms.famous n mr.savior!! 😆 EPIC comp!
eheheh his prays were ans but then his entry in the reharsal hall commenced the fightS!😆

so,got to see Sharon's smartness in this update!and our swayam not way behind!😃
eheheh the 1st fight was cute!
phir instead of dancing they were hurting each other 😆
following the beautiful n weird(in terms of Swayam) seq!
wow that took me into sum other trance re bhaiya! 😳 truly enjoyed too!!it was just beautiful!
the move which you explained made me remember haye rama n also yaadein ka ek move!!😳you beautifully described the whole seq!!! 😳

eheheh then the lights go off and we have 5 swayams(including him) coming up!!😆
eeheh the part was also good,i expected ki original swayam would be more hesistant but i'l leave all those feelings for the rest parts! 😉 😆 😳
ehehhe bachao bachao!!😆 so even sharon's not lost kicked him... ahem ahem... there!!!
eheehe 🤣 finally score 5-4 sharon wins!!!😃😆

thank you so much bhaiya for dedicating this entertaining part.which was just like an ep 4 me!with humor,entertainment,DIL,DANCE...great work!!👏⭐️you put these pieces together n in the right place!!!i feel too too awsum to be 1 of those names in the dedication list!! 😃 😆

Edited by Satluvsd3 - 13 years ago
idiot_box thumbnail
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Posted: 13 years ago
Dhokla firstly im sooo glad that you have taken up writing again. Good decision! Proud of you!! Coming to this ss, the concept is so unique!! The characters are so very different from what we know them to be especially Swayam. Right from the introduction his character has intrigued me. The brother-sister relationship between Kria and Swayam and their different points of view was a good start! Then the way Swayam is narrating the events of his life is interesting. I really like the style of narration you have adopted here, that is through Swayam's point of view. The important events like the first tiff between Rey and Swayam and Sharon and Swayam was well-written. And so was the swimming competition part. The dance war between Sharon and Swayam was amusing and the romantic part was just beautiful. And then Swayam tried to scare Sharon and in return he was hit where it hurts the most. Hahaha! Girl power and all! It was really funny. Abhi jaldi se next part update kariyo! Waiting for it eagerly!!
-Rasmalai!!
Edited by idiot_box - 13 years ago
Twinkle_d3 thumbnail
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Posted: 13 years ago
Hey its amazing..
Loved it..
Sweet bitter fights..
Waiting for next part..
Lovenarbhi thumbnail
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Posted: 13 years ago

Pratek thanks so much yaar, 🤗 i will read it now okk and comment karungi.

pratik54000 thumbnail
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Posted: 13 years ago
Hi friends... I am sorry being little bit late but my PC was not working so was not able to update earlier. Now I am updating and I am sorry for not replying to your comments this time. I have read all the comments and i have liked them to the core thank you very much to all those who took time out to comment on this one. I will try to reply as soon as possible. Thanks for the support you all have shown to this one. Here goes the Update...

Act – 4 The Chase (Hit and run) – Game begins

I had decided to take revenge for that kick…. Thank god everything is fine I thought for a moment that the kick had blown me off.

Miss Famous you will get to know now what can I do to take the revenge now.

I called up advertising and banner printing agency and ordered for a banner saying: "This spot belongs to Swayam Shekhawat…"

Now you will get an eye opener in tomorrow morning Miss Famous.

I slept with some pain that night but I had planned something special for that duo of brother and sister. Now they will know what it means to cheat on Swayam Shekhawat.

I got up in morning early than usual and got ready very early that day because I had to prepare for a grand welcome to Miss Famous and Mr. Protector.

I took the banner with me and reached college very early and parked my car and took out the banner and stick it on the pillar that was near the place where I had parked my car.

Actually the banner said like this "This place is reserved for Royal parking of Swayam Shekhawat" and I stick that banner on the parking spot of the duo of Protector and Famous.

And I prepared a note saying "This space is reserved for trash parking of Miss Sharon Rai Prakash and Mr. Reyansh Singhania" and stick it on the last place where nobody used to park because it used to stink very much because college gutter was near from that place.

Both this royal siblings had this habit of coming late so all the spots except that spot which was reserved for them were taken.

And the whole college was discussing this hot topic as how and when swayam Shekhawat took that parking and how did the authorities approve him to do that.

Actually I had asked Dadaji for a fever and request the authorities to provide me parking but nobody should know that how it happened yet I should get the parking space of my choice.

You know I never wanted to use my contacts for small things but these siblings were playing on me big time and it was high time to teach them a lesson.

They both came as usual after whole college came and were stunned to see that their spot was marked as reserved for me and they got furious.

But they both got more furious when they found out that where there parking place was taken to and what was written there. Both of them knew who else can do that except for me.

Hahahaha but there was nothing that they could do about that because they went to principle sir's cabin to complain but they didn't knew that princi was the one who permitted this.

Princi told them that my father had requested and we permitted as one of the trustees backed up on that.

They were furious to know that Mr. Shekhawat the main trustee backed up on me and that too for a parking place. They asked the reason to princi but princi smartly said that my father works for Shekhawat's to avoid the doubts.

They both left the office but how could they take this when their own parents were the trustees and they were forced to do that.

Mr. Protector got furious on me and came straight to canteen to beat me up but there was a technical problem there because it was college and fighting was offending to rules he couldn't beat me.

But as we have heard many times that "revenge doesn't know any limits" Mr. Protector and Miss Famous one after another challenged me…

"Before the end of today I will teach you a lesson Swayam and mind it, this would be dirtier than your plan" Mr. Protector Spoke

"And remember this that your father works for trustees and our parents are trustees on the board so you will see hell today" Miss. Famous also Spoke

I was smiling hearing them and I thought to myself that I am open to anything from you siblings I can never lose to you.

I went near Bharat and spoke "You know Bharat I have heard that dogs who bark much never cut you" I think two of such kinds are standing here near us and barking at me.

This one got the whole canteen laugh like maniacs and there could be evidently seen that both of them were getting more irritated and furious at me. But what could I do more?? I actually wanted that only.

I wanted them to be most furious and irritated because the score was 6-5 now I was ahead with one point I petted my back thinking wow master plan swayam.

They both were turning to go and I stopped Miss Famous

"Its 6-5 now sexy you need buck up now" and winked at her… and went before her.

You should have been there to see her face that it was like she would scratch my whole face like a wild cat if someone permits her violence there in the canteen.

But it was fun whole college had started talking about the incident and I was having this spotlight on me because never ever such thing had happened that Reyansh and Sharon were trapped in something.

But as you know someday you have to face what you haven't faced at all.

You know the way they had threatened me to teach me a lesson I thought they had some plan and I will have to face something in first lecture itself.

But to my surprise Miss. Famous did not come to class for two lectures and I was happy that she was hiding because of me. Bharat came to me after second lecture at 10 and said that I had done amazing job and we were relived from that Miss Famous for the day now.

I was also happy to hear that we will have a peaceful time today. We all headed to canteen where Vishakha and Neha also joined us.

I was surprised to know that even Reyansh did not attend the class and they were happy for that.

But dude now that was not funny at all both of them were not in class for two lectures. They never do something like this and today they were bunking class after class that means something unusual is going on.

And that was like alarming situation for me to get aware of because I was surely in some problem. Just that a peon came to canteen and told me that princi wanted to meet me.

I thought to myself why was he calling me at that time? Than I thought that he would be willing to talk to me after finding out that I was grandson of Mr. Shekhawat. So I went on.

Then in the way a thought came to me that may be this is not as simple as it seems. And I was having this strong feeling that something was not good for sure because Reyansh and Sharon were not in scene from morning and for today I was surely their target so they must have come up with some dirty plan. And their plans were really dirty I knew that.

I was getting these bad intuitions about the situations. I thought and prayed that god I hope everything is normal as it looks like.

I reached the princi's office and knocked the door and asked for his permission to go in.

As soon as I got in and stood before Princi, he started starring at me like some criminal was standing before him and then I felt awkward so I started to see some other place to distract myself from him but seeing around I found that I was not the one standing there but Mr. Nilesh Kotain was also standing there.

I thought why was he standing there? There is something seriously wrong I know now.

Just than Principal Sir spoke up "Mr. Swayam Shekhawat I respect Mr. Shekhawat and his recommendations but that doesn't mean that you can do whatever you wish here in the college. This place is meant for studies and you are here to study only"

"I know that Sir and I'm doing my best in studies but what did I do Sir" I asked

"You are asking me what did you do, don't you know your partner in crime standing here and he has already confessed that what you both have done" he spoke

"But I haven't done anything with him Sir Trust me he is lying" I spoke

"Oh he is here accepting his mistake knowing that I will punish him then why will he lie to me" he said

"I don't know sir but Nilesh is not my friend and we don't study in same sections then why will I do anything with him" I spoke

"Well the pervert acts don't need any relations Mr. Swayam" he said and showed me a video in which was recorded from girls change room.

I was shocked to see the images and I could not believe that somebody could do that also. But then I realized that this was done to trap me and Nilesh had sacrificed himself for his friends by accepting that.

I always knew that both the siblings were jerks but didn't knew that they were this much jerk that they can go to any extent to get their revenge. I was sure that Sharon had an easy access there so this thing was total set up of her only and the plan would be also of her.

Miss Famous this was not good at all and I will surely remember this one now for long time and you will pay for this now I promised myself to answer that dirty prank.

"So what are you thinking now?" princi spoke

"I never expected this kind of shit from you Swayam. I thought you were a good student who focused on his own activities" he further added

"Sir I really don't know who recorded this one and I swear that I don't have contribution in this one" I said in my defense

"Well Mr. Nilesh says that he has recorded this video and you had arranged everything by coming early to college and college attendance register and parking records say that you were fairly early today than other students so he is speaking sense" he spoke to me

Nilesh was smiling at me. Jerk loser how anybody can do a cheap thing like that just to trap somebody. If I was not in principal's cabin then I would surely have beaten the hell out of nil that day. I was getting furious.

"Look Swayam Nilesh has confessed everything and this is the first time you both have done something like this so I am warning both of you and looking at both of your records I am just suspending both of you for a day today and you can attend college from tomorrow but mind it this is only for this time if I see you again doing this than you will have to face severe consequences" he said allowing us to leave

We both said sorry to him and left. I was just waiting to get outside to beat the hell out of Nilesh today.

As soon as we got out from the office I hit a punch on back of Nilesh and he fell straight into the legs of Mr. Protector. He helped Nilesh to get up and came at me smiling and Miss Famous was also with him smiling

"Remember I told you my revenge would be dirtier than you and here you go" he said smiling

"ya what did you think we were running away from you never, and now you will sit home thinking why did I messed up with them" she spoke

"You know what I thought you were a man and will come up with a better plan then this but I forgot who wears pants here" I spoke looking at Miss Famous

Mr. Protector got very angry and held my color and spoke "What do you think of yourself? And what do you mean by who wears pants? You mean to say I don't get any ideas"

"You yourself are confessing that and you know who wears pants here" I smiled

Miss Famous came up to me and spoke "it doesn't matters who wears pants or whose plan was it because the bottom line is Mr. Swayam Shekhawat is suspended now because of that plan"

Reyansh smiled at this and spoke "Ya the bottom line is important and ya you were right that was not my plan because Sharon had a pity on you. Otherwise I had a plan which was dirtier than this but it was your good fortune that Sharon's plan was put in force. Now don't waste our time as we have to attend the remaining lectures" he spoke smiling at me in evil way.

All of them left after that leaving me behind. My friends came to me and asked what happened. I told them everything about what happened and I was trapped badly now.

Just than Bharat spoke "If they trapped you and got you suspended than they should also not get to attend the college it is as simple as that"

"You are right Bharat we should do something to get revenge out of them" Vishakha spoke

"But I cannot be in college now and how can I get revenge now" I asked them

"We are in the college; we will do whatever you want to take the revenge" Amar and Neha said

"Ok guys let me think something keep your phones on I am going out and do something" I spoke.

I drove off from college and just reached near the main road and I got this idea. That was really a master idea and I could get both the siblings suspended for encouraging chaos in college campus.

Wow swayam dude you rock I told myself. What an idea you have got dude I petted my back again congratulating myself for an outstanding idea.

I called my friends and told the idea. They all were excited to after learning about the idea. Even Neha told me that "you have the most evil mind Swayam, somebody to should learn from you that how to seek revenges"

Well that was a big compliment for me considering the situation and I smiled to myself and went to get the required things to execute the idea.

I arranged everything that they needed to execute our plan and packed them properly so that nobody could find out exactly what it was.

But what came as the problem now was how to drop that to them in the college. I was standing beside the college and then suddenly an idea struck me.

Again I felt like petting my back for such an outstanding idea.

I called Vishakha and told her that I am sending the parcel on her name through a courier boy.

Now don't wonder much I got that courier boy right near the college he was going into college to deliver some parcels so I booked another parcel to him by giving extra money to make it official parcel to the student in college and gave him extra money not to recognize me and if anybody asks anything than just say that some woman in burkha came to him and booked this parcel to him.

He agreed to that and now the parcel went inside as per my plan and reached Vishakha as I had planned.

She took the parcel and placed it in the girls' fresh room. Well now I had to take revenge from the same place which they used to trap me. But I was more decent than them so I had not plan anything dirty like them.

Vishakha smartly kept the box a little open and went in the bathroom. In some minutes the noise of girls gathered whole college and everybody was wondering as what was going inside the room and why were girls shouting so much.

So our AVP came with princi and VP and since she was the only lady she went in the change room to see what was going on.

She came out running shouting bachao-bachao….

Princi asked her as what the reason was actually.

"There are I don't know how many cockroaches running around in the girls change room and there is more still coming out of a box" she told

"Whose box is that? And why is she doing such a stupid thing?" princi told

Vishakha came out saying "It is my box sir"

"What? It is your box… than why are you spreading cockroaches in girls change room when you know how much irritating that is. I will punish you for this" Princi told her

"But Sir I haven't checked the parcel yet I just kept it at the bench and went to get fresh n up. Just then everybody started shouting and I saw many cockroaches were coming out of that box" she told

"It was parcel that means somebody had sent this to you knowing what is inside this" Princi said

"Yes Sir" she said

"Who sent you this?" he asked

"Sir the label stick on it said it was sent by Bharat, but he was with me all the time from morning and he hasn't called anybody from the morning. So I think there is somebody else behind this" she told him

"I swear sir I was in class and you can ask the courier boy who delivered the courier" Bharat told

The courier boy was in library delivering couriers came up when he was called and as I had said him he spoke the same thing that some woman came in burkha at college gate gave him the parcel that deliver it Vishakha and gave me Rs.500 so I gave this parcel to her.

"That means one of girls have done this" princi said

"No Sir it didn't look like a girl because she was very tall and looked like it was a boy from voice" courier boy said. I had asked him to say it they say that there was some girl behind this and I gave him extra 500 bucks for saying that. Now you anything is fair in love and war.

Just than Neha spoke up holding that card

"Sir this is Sharon's handwriting for sure I have seen her handwriting for many times during the dance rehearsals. I am sure it is Sharon's wiring" Neha said

Princi got the card and saw it and gave to Sharon saying "look at the card Miss Singhania is this hand writing your or not?"

Miss Famous looked at the hand writing and was wondering how her hand writing came on that card. Well hardly Miss Famous knew that I was expert in copying hand writing of people.

"Sir this handwriting is like mine but I have not sent this to her, nor I have written this one" she spoke

"Sir I know she is the one who did it, and I know why she is doing it just because we have become friends with Swayam and Swayam insults her frequently so she is trying to take revenge of that by making us punished from you" She spoke

"I haven't done that you bitch, why you I take a revenge on you" she spoke

"Because you don't like us from beginning" Neha spoke

"Bull shit that is nonsense why would we do something that traps us in it" Reyansh spoke

"That's why you have written my name on it, and sir that courier boy is saying that it looked like a man who gave this parcel and he was tall than see here out of all of us only Reyansh is tall in the campus now, that means he has done fever to his sister by doing that" Bharat spoke and Amar supported him.

"hmm I can see that very evident from what the proofs are here and we all know in college that how much you hate this four guys because they are not from your circle of trust and since very start you all are asking us to get this four out of team so they are right on this and you all 5 are suspended for a day for this senseless act of your for trying trap to somebody" princi spoke

Now that was an equalizer from me. My master plan worked they were forced leave college and I took my revenge very smartly on them. Miss Famous didn't know that this time she was up against Swayam I am not a good guy any day who will tolerate everything that they do.

They all came out from the college and I was standing right at the opposite side of main gate of the college. They saw me and understood that it was me who had set up that whole trap because nobody else had guts to do that. And I would never lose on opportunity to trap them anyhow. And this time it was the need for revenge sake.

Mr. Protector was fuming with anger and drove the car straight into my legs as if he is gone hit me. I just stood there as I was. He stopped the car and got out of it and with him his sister Miss Famous also got out who was also fuming in anger. And I was smiling at them now because I was ahead of them with a better plan at the same place and now princi will doubt that may be they were the one who would have tried to trap me in that.

So this was a better plan anyhow and that deserved two marks for a perfect execution. Miss Famous coming to me and I was enjoying that look on her face, she was like wild cat who was sat free to kill anything she liked.

She came up to me and before she could say anything I told her "Hey this was better than your plan so I should get 2 marks for that and which means I am ahead of you by 8-7 now"

"Do hell with your marks now, its damm serious now because you don't have any idea what mess you have taken yourself into by making us suspend" she spoke with full of anger

"Oh I got scared, cut the crap you all first trap me to suspend so this was on the cards. What did you all thought haan that I will go home so easily and you all won never. Swayam never backs out from anything. Now get this straight in your bloody loser heads" I replied her smiling

"Oh ya what can you do more to hurt us haan you don't know what extent we can go to harm you" Mr. Protector spoke

Miss Famous was standing very proud there on her brother's words. She looked at me with evil eyes.

"So Mr. Protector is saying me that he can make any kind of plans on me, so you think you are an ultimate savior of all the girls right and that's why our this so called rivalry has begun" I spoke to him

"Yes you got that right I never leave the person who don't show respect girls" he spoke

"Oh ok than why don't we deal with it straightly, come on one on one and let's see who can beat whom" I spoke

"No I am not idiot like you who would fight you on street like this now never. Infect when I can plan well then why do I beat you up physically" he replied

I got it that he was trying to escape from the fight and this is the best time when I can get my hands on him. But he will not fight me if I beg him. I will have to make him fight with me indirectly.

Just than an idea struck me, I went near Miss Famous and spoke "So your brother is Mr. Protector and can protect any girl even if that girl is wrong just like Shweta was that day"

"Yes I am proud of my brother and ya Shweta was wrong that day and we had set up a plan to exclude those two jerks from our dance team but you saved them but don't worry we soon will get them excluded from the dance team" She spoke arrogantly

"Oh nice way to get things done first I should clap for you than but till the time I am with them you cannot do anything to them and even in my back you cannot touch them because now they know how to deal with you all. By the way now you start worrying because you don't have any bloody idea that what is coming your way" I replied

"What?" She said

And before anybody could say anything I just kissed Miss Famous in front of her brother and her friends and that too wildly and she was just trying get rid of me. Finally after feeling like out breath, so I left her and she was like totally shocked on what happened and others were also shocked with what happened just now.

"How dare you? How did you do that?" She spoke angrily

"Well like this" replying I again kissed her on lips and to my surprise she was responding to me wildly even more than me. Now I was seriously getting out of breath so I took the force to her side and she seemed out of breath so we left each other.

"Now you understand how or I should do it again to explain it to you" I spoke

But to my surprise she didn't answer anything and just caught me into a deep kiss again. I was like damm she has the lips in the world. They are so tasty and she was like a wild cat just going on and on and Reyansh and his gang were surprised to see that. Now I was getting out of breaths so I just forcefully got her away from me and we broke the kiss.

She was now smiling at me and I was awestruck now as to what had happened suddenly.

"Its 8-9 now because my one kiss did what your two couldn't do" she spoke

"Oh is that so then I can give you one back which is worth three marks than" I replied winking at Mr. Protector who was already fuming with anger.

"What the hell you pervert don't you dare touch my sister again and I will show you what I can do to you. And you Sharon why the hell you kissed him, go back and let me show this jerk what can I do" he spoke

"Oh ya I am dying to see that Mr. Protector" I replied

And came up to me and we started beating the hell out of each other. We didn't know what caught us so badly that we were literally beating the hell out of each other.

He hit me on a the face saying this was for kissing my sister and I hit one equal to two back in his stomach and said this is because your sister kissed me back more vigorously you jerk. And we knew no stop then.

But suddenly I don't from where you came in between. My sister Kriya the great came and how I know you were a big fan of Gandhi ji and hated fights. You came between us and stopped us.

"What the hell Swayam you had promised me that you will not hit anyone nor fight with anyone than what is all this going on here" you said remember

"Hey Kriya where the hell did you come from and this jerk deserves that you know and where is his crap sister who thinks she is the only planner here. These two are responsible for taking the worst out of me" I replied

"Swayam go in the car and you know this why uncle sent you from Howard to this college because you will change with new atmosphere around you" you said

At that moment I suddenly saw that everybody was drooling on you and all the girls were getting jealous of you. Even the ultimate Mr. Protector was lost in you.

Then I saw you again you were wearing that black dress which was gifted by me on your last birthday and you were looking damm hot there with the knee height dress and straight open hair which looked good on you and those black shades suited you equally. You looked like some princess there and of course you are a princess of our house and nobody is more beautiful than you.

But everybody was shocked with two things and they were

1) I studies in Howard and 2) such a hot looking girl was standing by my side

Because till than everybody thought no girls were interested in me but little they knew you were my sister and I saw everybody getting jealous of you.

Especially those siblings were mouth opened seeing you with me. I don't know why I liked the way Miss Famous was seeing you. She was getting furious seeing you near me and same was the case with Mr. Protector who was getting angry with the way you were hugging me and taking me back.

I really enjoyed that scene in front of my eyes. I saw Miss Famous getting angry because you were taking me away from there and asking kaka to bring the car with himself. That was really a nice day because you had this perfect timing to come to college to drop your admission form.

I still remember the face of Miss Famous that day she was like how can anybody be equal to her in Fashion and everything and what more angered her was that you were with me and holding me like I belonged to you. I really liked that.

I think she liked me there that's why she reacted like that but I don't know what was next to come between our rivalry.

I have tried my best to make this one as entertaining as previous one. I hope you all like this and please comment on aspects why you liked and what you didn't like.

surbhimathur thumbnail
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Posted: 13 years ago
Res!!
*edited*

CA Bro!!!
Su chhe Boss!!!
Aapne toh samaa baandh diyaa!
Matlab itna acha explain kaise kar sakta hai koi...so clearly and perfectly??
Acha ab cumin to the update..
Swayam ka character kya zordaar banaya hai aapne..ekdum cut to cut! Matlab wo maare toh mai dus maaru...jaisa hi kuch :-D
Swayam's planning for the first prank was steady and brilliant...he used his sources and safely kicked out both rey and sharon out of their reserved parking...then bro sis ka palatvaar was jordaarr...pehle toh they warned swayam then hahahaaa i lyked that swayam winking at sharon..then swayam getting trapped under their plan...that was so cheapp mahn...aur nilesh toh bada obedient nikla idhar :-P
Swayam chucked out of the clg!! His mastermind again ran...and haye raam..what planning he does..cockroachess...hahaha...zabardastt!! Aur fir bhai behan suspended :-D:-D
Aur ab aaya mera favourite part!!! ;-);-)
Swayam kissed sharon in front of her bro...hahahahahahahahaha...masttt!! Sharon bhi chaalu niklii yaha toh...usne bhi palat ke...hahahahahaha...and rey ki shakal by god...bechara bhaai...at the same time we saw swayam's feelings at the moment...he found sharon beautiful...for the first tym he saw sharon with different perspective..and then the fightt...haha monologues were funnyy...fir kriaa aayii...everyone lost in her and in the end swayam smirked..!!
But i want to compliment here that you chose such innovative and awesome ideas..it left me all thinking that dude i can never bring such creativity in my work.
Dil jeet liya aapne pratik!

Fabulous work.
Update soon.
Edited by surbhimathur - 13 years ago
_Deepika_ thumbnail
13th Anniversary Thumbnail Sparkler Thumbnail + 4
Posted: 13 years ago
Hey Mr CA😊😊😊

Goshhh...i hate my self ...I am so mean and insensitive...i was the one who forced u to get into writing again...i know how i convinced u ...m a sweet blackmailer 😛😛😈...and i didn't comment on this fabulous piece of work till now...m such a silly and stupid girl...

U are an amzing writer Mister...never ever try to loose the writer inside u Mr CA...its surely makes u a better person..trust me...this piece of work is one of ur best till date...aha...I am so proud of myself ...to force u for writing this...well done Deepika...patting my back...😉


Coming to this SS...ummm...hmmm...ahh...well...hmmm...wat to say...i am at loss of words...to say anything about this work of urs...the new style of writing u have adopted is just phenomenal...goshhh...the flow in ur writing is tremendous ...starting from the prologue...till part -4 ...u kept the reader in me completely engrossed in the story...and at the end of part-4 ...i was like..why the hell this update ended...Sirji...Salute...u are amazing...i cant tell u how beautifully u have described the whole college rivalry scenario... Mr Savior...Miss Famous...Mr Protector ...ahaaa...u r amusing when it comes to characterization... u changed the sweet lovable Swayam's character upside down...180* turn from the real swayam...and its so realistically portrayed...the reader never thinks its a tailor made character ...the actions reactions...the situation...oh-so-real...yet dramatic...goshhh...i wish..i wish..me aisa kuch likh pati...never mind...mera dost likhta he na...bilkul "OUT OF THE WORLD.." ..me happy with that ...😳

The swimming competition..his win..her reaction...the revenge...the tricks ...so realistically portrayed yet they are so dramatic...i loved it when she planted that girl against him...or even when she and rey got him restricted from college with the help of nilesh...college rivalry ...masterfully depicted...

His revenge ..on her ... i reallly loved swayam monolgues..praising himself..on his master plan...hehe...the way he was praising himself...lol...

Loved the new attraction between enemies ...the hatred has turned into uncontrollable traction aha...m loving it...they were about to kiss awww...and she kicked him...😆...poor guy...

The recent part was amusing...he kissed her in front of the whole college...in front of her brother ...great going...and she kissed back...gshhh...kill me ...the kiss ..the effect beautifully described...and the master stroke comes as kriya's entry ...she is jealous to see a hot girl so close to him...Rey is lost in kriya's beauty 😆😆😆...u my friend is just amazing when it comes to story telling...the whole SS has left the reader in me craving for other parts...ahhh...it was such a joy ride...loved each and every chapter so unique ...different from what we generally read...

Now...after writing this SS if u will say ..u r not good writer...me tumhara kya haal karungi ...tum bhi nhi jante..u know me kitni badi wali ziddi hu ...ye SS mene kaise post karwaya..mujeh hi pata he......hehe...so aage se nakhre mat dikhana...chup chap likhte jao...on a serious note ...m really touched dear ...thanx for keeping my request...means a lot 😳...keep showering us with ur beautiful writing...waiting for the next chapter ...eagerlyy...

Luv
Deep😳
Edited by deep_Tanha - 13 years ago
SanskritiS thumbnail
13th Anniversary Thumbnail Rocker Thumbnail + 2
Posted: 13 years ago
res
unres
awesome update 😊
Swayam reserved the parking lot😆
Sharey got suspended Swayam with help of Nilesh n in revenge Swayam also got suspended Sharey
The idea of Swayam was fantastic
Entry of Kria amazing even Rey was drooling
Edited by sanstina - 13 years ago
HPHolic-3 thumbnail
14th Anniversary Thumbnail Dazzler Thumbnail Networker 3 Thumbnail
Posted: 13 years ago
RESERVED
Unres I M late..:(
🤣 🤣 pratik gosh from where u got these ideas.I seriously love it.Full on entertainment dhamka
I M loving this revenge tale.8-9 lol.Swayam is really clever but sharon is no less she is a true diva.Its called nehle pe dehle..:p
Hehe liked the way swayam excite rey to fight with him by kissing her sis in front of everyone 😳 Well sharon's answer was no less
"Oh is that so then I can give you
one back which is worth three
marks than" " 🤣 koi inhe samjao ladai chal rahi hai kissing session nahi
Finally kria's entry lol it add more masala to this SS.I can imagine sharon oh-so jealous expression.I can't wait for next part
Please pratik update it ASAP...:)
Edited by sadiyaswaron - 13 years ago

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