The look in her eyes... She looked at me as if I was something magnificent. It was only with her, I felt loved. Wanted. I felt like I belonged.
The meadow. The sunlight. Her flowing white dress. Her long black tresses. The scene was serene.
A gentle piano melody enchanted the place. She slowly made her way over and rested her arms around my neck.
"I love you."
***
"All I know is that even if he is your son," she glanced up to his eyes as I felt weight of her forehead on mine, "...it won't change anything. He was the past, he was before I happened to you," her cool hands made their way to my face as I felt the tinge she had always mentioned.
"It's not your fault."
It might not be but still I will be thankful to the lord, almighty, or whatever it is that made her, to make her so perfect...
...for me.
"Khushi," I felt my breath starting to stagger. I knew she felt it too, as she boosted herself up on her delicate toes and calmed me with a brush of her lips. "Arnav..." she caressed my fortunate cheeks with her thumb,
"You're not your dad,"
"Never let yourself believe otherwise. No matter what anyone says."
I was left dumbfounded at her perfect choice of words. It always left me in awe to see how she in a way always read my mind. She always knew what to say, what to do.
How could somebody be so perfectly designed for someone?
What could I do to show her? "I love you so much," I whispered as I cradled her face in my palms. But even those few words fell short in describing this feeling which went way beyond love.
I felt sometimes as to just rip my heart out of my flesh and rest it in her feet. To show her that she was that heart, my heart. The one I would die without.
Before I could think further, the crazed, hungry lover in me got ahold of her lips again. I was surprised I didn't bruise her when we broke only for air.
To be quite frank, I'd rather die of suffocation then let go of her lips, but she too is human.
It was enough. I couldn't bare it further. I rushed to the side of the room and ripped the envelope apart like a caged madman. I needed to know. She needed to know.
"Arnav before we do this I have something to confess."
What? She accidently added a slight amount of sugar to the jalebies she fed me earlier? There was nothing worse than what she might have to face right now.
"Sweetheart, please... Do this first." I let my eyes bore into hers. "It's killing me slowly, deteriorating my soul from within. Just please..." I begged.
"But Arn..."
"Read it." I finally commanded against my clenched teeth. It felt treacherous but there was no easier alternative to which I could have uttered the words which commanded her to possibly ruin her life.
I couldn't bear to watch and so I turned away, not meeting her gaze. Eyeing the sun that shone through the window, unaffected.
I waited. I heard no sound. A minute passed by. Still nothing.
"Arnav..." finally I heard the first audible sound in what felt like eons.
"What does it say?" I asked, still not having yet built up the courage to face her.
"Arnav it sa..." I heard her voice waver and turned around to see her weak self-falling. Blood dripping down her mouth.
For a moment time froze. Nothing seemed to matter. Aarav. Sheetal. The reports.
Nothing.
My palm cushioned her head while I pulled her close to myself. Her eyes were threatening to close on me. However, they were not permitted to. And I would do bloody anything to make sure they followed their orders.
Her weak form molded against my arms as I felt warmth against my face only to see it came from a soft smile that had formed on her face.
"The only kids you'll ever are ours," she mumbled loud enough for me to hear as gestured over to the reports that fell forgotten next to her with her chocolate pearls.
I glanced at it to see the words "NEGETIVE" in big red boxy letters. A sigh escaped my mouth
But the relief of that nowhere compared to the fear of what I might have to face in the coming moments that might change my life, forever.
***
"I felt sometimes as to just rip my heart out of my flesh and rest it in her feet. To show her that she was that heart, my heart. The one I would die without."
And so I did.
***
A gentle piano melody enchanted the place. She slowly made her way over and rested her arms around my neck.
"I love you."
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