It's Complicated;Family Tree on page 100 - Page 43

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CHAPTER FIFTEEN:
REPENT AND REGRET

After many days, Akash is very excited today. The whole Singhania palace is happy. Even Khushi was feeling contented. Payal's godhbharai (baby shower) will be done soon.

She thought,

"Preparations will start now. I too will take part.

Only women are allowed here. I will engross myself in work and would keep away all my old memories.

But?

When the relatives will come and ask about me'what'what will I say?

What is she? Who is she?

What will I say?

What am I?

A Spinster?

A Married woman?

A Divorcee?

A Widow?

Or

A woman without any identity, who has no where to go and is living here as a burden at her brother's house.

What Am I ?

What is my Identity?

Who am I?

Hey Devi Maiyya.

Please show me a way.

Oh Devi Maiyya."

She got up suddenly. She remembered something. She opened the wardrobe. The clothes were kept nicely and were maintained well. She tried to find out, but she couldn't get it.

"Had Di not sent it here? Is it with Arnav? No. it must be here only. I had kept that in Anjali Di's table with the note. I know her. She will keep her words"

"It is with me Khushi. She has given it to me as you said. Arnav wanted it but he didn't take after reading that just to keep your last wish."

Khushi (turned): Maa

Neelam hands her a box.

Khushi opens the box and a silent tear escaped her eyes.

#### FLASHBACK ####

[She was crying vehemently in all frustration. Her marriage is finished. She packed her bags. She parted it from her. It has no meaning. She kept it in the box. She tore a page from her diary and wrote

Di,

Please give this to Maa. It has no more importance after all these incidents. Please never give this to your brother, even if he asks. At least for my sake. This is my last wish. Don't try to find me. I will be well. Be happy and tell him to enjoy his life, I will no more be there to be his problem. Forget my existence.

Khushi.]

Her mangalsutra.

She felt terrible. She realised what bond she had broken. She even understood what pain she had given him by not letting it to keep with him.

Khushi hugged her mother and cried.

Neelam (made her sit in bed and she herself beside her): you made such a blunder that none knows what will the consequences be. So forget your past and start moving forward. Khushi the more you will look behind the slower you would be moving forward.

Khushi: but Maa I am repenting for what I have done. Maa it can never be done right.

Neelam: who said you that? Don't cry and think rationally. Lamenting and repenting would give you only pain and no way to solution.

Khushi: so what would I do?

Neelam: rectify and move forward. Remember?

Khushi: but you were there with me last time.

Neelam: this time also I would help you. But you need to find the way out. I can only guide you. It is your life and you should make your own life in your own way.

Khushi: I love you so much Maa. Thank you. I was so blind that time.

Neelam: but you were blind by pride not love. That difference created this whole mess.

Khushi: Maa, what will happen?

Neelam: everything will be good. Keep hope and faith in Devi Maiyya.

Remember one thing Khushi, whatever happens, happens for the best.

Khushi: what should I do now?

Neelam: think with logic and take every step with great caution. Cause if you do a little mistake this time you will be nowhere. So behave like a woman and not a child. You are always a child to me, but not for all.

Khushi: I understood.

Neelam: good. Now what will you do in Payal's godh bharai function?

Khushi: what do you mean?

Neelam: I think you know what I mean.

Khushi: Yes. Everyone will say regarding me.

Neelam: yes. And most probably not a single good word.

Khushi: oh Maa, how would I face so many people? So shameful it will be.

Neelam (keeps her hand in Khushi's shoulder and with assuring eyes): you don't need to come in the function and you will hear nothing.

Khushi: but Maa.

Neelam: I could understand. But it will be good for all of us. You don't need to feel isolated. You need a change also.

Khushi: I didn't get you.

Neelam: you can go to some friend's house.

Khushi: Maa I want to go to Mumbai. I will return after her godhbharai.

Neelam: as you wish. When do you want to go?

Khushi: After completing the preparations and before the function.

Neelam: if you are happy, then go. But don't try to meet him. It would make things more complicated.

Neelam left.

Location- Mumbai

Anjali and Shyam are leading their life. Both are hoping that somehow Arnav meets Khushi and the rest will go in the flow. They contacted Akash to know Khushi's reaction. Unfortunately it was not as they hoped. Khushi was indifferent. She hadn't spoken a single word about Arnav after her return. Akash was surprised to see Khushi interacting with Payal so well. She is looking after Payal as her own sister. Akash also informed that Aman was also here'so they need to be very careful to know what his next moves are. Aman and (late) Armaan had made their lives miserable'and now the same mistakes and misunderstandings must not be repeated.

Anjali gave a try. She herself informed Khushi about Arnav to see her reactions. But Khushi didn't react much as she used to be. Anjali could feel her pain. May be she is full of guilt, or sadness or repentance. Whatever it is'it has now become the wall between the two.

At first there were people who were the wall between them''but that can be removed. But FEELINGS ???

The wall of feelings is much stronger than any wall''even the Berlin wall.

But every thing has a break point. May be, here is also a break point and it is very necessary to find it.

There was only one option left.

Though a very risky one.

A meet of Arnav and Khushi.

This meet will decide their fate.

.

Either, the relationship will fall apart

Or,the relationship will see a renaissance

Whatever will happen the result will be in extremes

Khushi was still thinking that what she should do.

"I must go in Mumbai for few days. A change will be better to start my work with a fresh mind.

It will wash away my past in that water and would start afresh.

It was the place where everything started and where everything ended. The best phase of my life was spent there. My worst days ended there.

Seas are strange. Good as well as bad. Nice waves as well as tsunamis.

Mumbai was the start of my life in a new phase and again it will kick start my life.

All my happiness started there.

I met Arnav there and fell in love with him there at the school-college fest.

I got to know about my baby

What a great similarity with those waves.

It's turbulence, the spin and then a huge uproar and crashing and everything calm and contented.

My life is measureless like the sea''''''.though I tried to look further I could see nothing except the blue waters''..nothing except uncomprehending ways.

Our relation was like

Bhool Bhulaiya https://wikimapia.org/17904742/Bhool-Bhulaiya-Labyrinth

She remembered how Arnav had taken her there after their marriage at her request. The guide there had said,

"The king and his queen used to play hide and seek there. There is only a single way out to come out of here. If it is missed, you are lost forever and none would be able to find you other than us who had studied and been guiding all the tourists."

Something struck in her mind.

"First I need to be logical and mature. To get back Arnav I need to use my brains more than my heart.

This brings the first dilemmatic question. Should get another chance?

Khushi's battle started within herself, between her HEAD and HEART.

HEAD: never. How can you think to get a second chance?

HEART: why? Why can't I get a second chance? Everyone gets.

HEAD: but everyone is not you.

HEART: I know. Everyone is not me. That is why I am asking

HEAD: you are taking it in a wrong way. Everyone can get because they are no one to him.

HEART: being close to his heart why can't I get a second chance?

HEAD: you only said yourself. Yes, you are close to his heart and so you shouldn't get another chance. You hurt him. You stabbed him deep in his heart. You didn't give him a SINGLE CHANCE and now you yourself is asking for SECOND chance? Great. Everyone should applaud for your shamelessness and guts to think so.

HEART: I didn't think. You think. I feel. I am sorry and want to rectify.

HEAD: you are too selfish. You are blinded by your pride and you are in a rush to get forgiveness.

HEART: no. I am not blinded by all these. I am blinded by LOVE.

HEAD: really? If it was so, then you wouldn't break your love. You broke faith."

LOVE IS FAITH.

&

FAITH IS FOREVER

She felt devastated. She could feel the same pain that she had been giving Arnav so long.

"I broke the relation without trusting or waiting for an explanation from him. It was really insane of me."

check page 84 for chapter sixteen

awesome... very nice way of explaining the emotions... m glad i started reading this story... else i would have missed an awesome piece of writing... continue soon dear 👏